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LOCATION: Toronto, Ontario ARENA: Skydome DATE: May 13, 2002 REMAINING WRESTLERS: 13
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LOCATION: Toronto, Ontario ARENA: Skydome DATE: May 13, 2002 REMAINING WRESTLERS: 13
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(Ixon and Kurt Stone are playing poker in the back when Ixon begins to think.)
Ixon: Hey man, where’s Tommie?
Kurt Stone: I thought you had him?
Ixon: What do you mean I HAD HIM!
(Ixon flips the table then regains his composure. The two decide to go looking for their french-grade chum.)
Jimmy: Welcome everyone to UWA Survivor! Tonight, either Zang, Pain Express, Uluz,
Chris Copeland, or the Brotherhood of Chaos team mates Tommie Gunn or Ixon will be
eliminated in tonights! In a six man steel cage match! The only way out is over the top
of the cage! There is no door attached to the cage!
Rudolph: Yeah! And The Leader of the Brotherhood of Chaos goes up against Chris
Reynolds! These two men put their undefeated records on the line against one and
other!
Jimmy: There is a dirty ol’ triple threat match taking place tonight, and Hardcore
Hooligan, CJ Scott, and THE MORTICIAN are gonna be slamming each others heads in
like retatrds.
Rudolph: Cliff Knight takes on Chris Rage! This match is guaranteed to be the “hot
shit”
Jimmy: Rudolph, stop trying to use upbeat, retro sayings like “hot shit”
Rudolph: Ahh, shut up you little rascal!
(Pass the Courvoisier begins to chime as Kurt Stone saunters to the ring wearing a huge silk robe! He is wearing big glider shades and he has a fat stoagie burning between his sausage fingers. Kurt Stone has a feather boa wrapped around his neck and he spins in circles as he pounds back a big swig of Courvoisier!)
[What’s on the titantron: The camera swoops around “Tha Answer” Kurt Stone one time as he cockily smirks | cutshot to Kurt Stone pointing and talking to a figure in the microphone | cutshot to Kurt Stone signing a few autographs and rubbing a young boy on the head | cutshot to Kurt Stone performing True Impact – a suplex converted into a DDT]
(Kurt Stone enters the ring and hops up and down in excitement)
[What’s on the titantron: a camera swoops around Chris Reynolds three-hundred and sixty degrees | cutshot to Reynolds landing a top rope elbow onto the chest of an unknown figure | cutshot showing a figure tapping out from his modified sharpshooter – the Endless Abandonment | cutshot to Chris Reynolds with EWWF title on his shoulder as he taps it twice]
(Chris Reynolds heads to the ring -all business-. He is accompanied by a mysterious man. He gets into the ring and stares at Kurt Stone, who is dancing in circles. Suddenly, Pass the Courvoisier turns back on and Kurt Stone points to the entrance way.)
(Ixon heads to ringside. Tommie Gunn is still unacounted for. Kurt Stone uses this moment to his advantage as he burns Chris Reynolds with the cigar. Reynolds screams and recoils from the burny goodness.)
(Ixon points and laughs at Reynolds for screaming like a girl. Kurt follows up by choking Reynolds with the feather boa. Kurt cover Reynolds with the silk robe and begins to attack him before he can get the cover off of him.)
(Chris Reynolds falls to the ground and Kurt grabs him by the legs. Reynolds locks eyes with Kurt Stone before “Tha Answer” flies between his legs and delivers an elbow drop. Kurt lifts up Reynolds, but Reynolds ensnares him in a belly to belly suplex. Reynolds takes the moment to regain his composure.)
(Ixon climbs onto the apron and looks as though he intends to cheat, but Chris Reynolds main man barks like a rabid dog and performs a jumping tackle. The two collapse to the ground and the man is sitting on Ixon’s chest smashing him repeatedly! The Man pulls out a pair of handcuffs and cuffs Ixon to the guardrail as a terrified Ixon tries to escape the madness that is... THE MAN.)
Jimmy: Ixon is handcuffed to the railpost! I can't believe this!
(Kurt, upon seeing this, begins to break down like a small child who has had it’s candy stolen. Reynolds sneaks up behind him and delivers a reverse snapmare. Kurt looks pretty hurt and he tries the roll out of the ring, but THE MAN, stops him and rolls him back in. Reynolds laughs like a hyena. He proceeds to drop heavy boots on the leader of the Brotherhood of Chaos!)
(Reynolds immediately goes to the top rope and does a backflip onto Kurt Stone. Stone looks stoned as he stumbles around the ring like he’s drunk. Reynolds goes off the ropes to build up speed and rocks Stone with a spear to the lower back of Stone. Stone falls outside to recoup.)
Jimmy: Who is this man any how?
Rudolph: Is he one of Chris Reynold henchmen or what?
(THE MAN walks over to Stone to put him back in the ring, but Stone has grabbed his bottle of Couvoisier and smashes it over the head of the MAN! Kurt Stone kneels down as though he going to cry about the waste of booze. Stone touches his fingers to the spilled liquid and licks his fingers. Stone grimaces and begins to dance his cares away. Reynolds reaches over the top rope and pulls Stone onto the apron by his hair. Reynolds executes a reverse suplex back into the ring and signals for his finisher!)
Jimmy: Whose this coming? It's the Mortician! Why is this his business here?
(While this is going on, Mortician heads to ringside and begins to pummel Ixon, who is still handcuffed to the rail. Mortician delivers a big boot and Ixon’s wrist is nearly ripped off! Mortician gets in a few more shots before heading backstage.)
Rudolph: Mortician just beat up a handcuffed man!
(Reynolds lifts Stone’s legs as “Tha Answer” begs for mercy. Reyolds just shakes his head in a NO fashion and applies the sharpshooter then rolls Kurt Stone onto his belly. Kurt squeels as his air is expelled from the pressure on his body!)
(Kurt hangs on for a few more seconds, then taps out! Reynolds lets go shortly after and circles the ring, celebrating.)
Jimmy: Kurt couldn't take the pressure of the Endless Abandonment. This is quite a lethal finisher in the Ultimate Survivor!
Rudolph: Randy Johnston, Rex Butler, now Kurt Stone have all fell victim of the Endless Abandonment!
(Kurt looks sad that he lost and rubs his quad muscle, but then he put his robe back on and dances to the backstage area... Forgetting about Ixon.)
Jimmy: Wow, Reynolds is still undefeated.
Rudolph: What a tasty match!
Jimmy: I wonder if Kurt’s gonna go back to get Ixon later?
Rudolph: I wonder if THE MAN is okay after getting hit with that bottle of
courvoisier!
Hardcore Hooligan: Hey Rage!
(Pain Express arrives at the “Party Central” and he taps the shoulder of Chris Rage.)
Pain Express: What’s this loud music about? I heard you are quite a trouble maker here Rage.
Hardcore Hooligan: Hey, c’mon guys. None of us are fighting each other tonight. C’mon in! Beer and Courvoisier for ALL!
(Pain Express charges into the room and the stripper starts to touch Express’s beer belly. Chris Rage shakes his head and leaves the area only to be replaced by President Pondababa who has two German Sheppard dogs on leashes. Pondababa creeps into the room and grabs one of the assorted bottles of booze in Damage’s locker room.)
Jimmy: Wow! That looks pretty fun in there! It’s Party Central in Johnny Damage’s locker room! Rudolph, you take control!
Rudolph: Hey, you get back here… Boy.
(Jimmy leaves the commentary booth and tra-la-la-la-la’s in an enthusiastic haste to the Party Central. Jimmy enters “Party Central” along with several others; Pain Express, President Pondababa, two strippers and two dogs. The camera focuses in on Hooligan who is smiling with the stripper crawling on top of him. He yells doing that weird lip thing on his official roster photo.)
Hardcore Hooligan: THAT’S BETTA!
[What’s on the titantron: A camera swoops around showing the figure of Chris Rage from all angles | cutshot to Chris Rage walking down the aisle to his theme music | cutshot to Chris Rage performing a neckbreaker from the top rope | cutshot to Chris slapping on the Cobra Clutch | cutshot to Chris Rage on the turnbuckle with the UCW Tag-Team Championship as the scene fades away]
(Rage, with a look of downright disgust on his face he shuffles to the ring with “The Last Time” by Amen blaring through the Skydome)
Rudolph: Okay, it looks like it’s just me here. I can be “jiggy” like Jimmy. I am “hip”. I am “cool”.
(“THE Premier Athlete” Cliff Knight emerges from his locker room. The cameraman is backing up, doing a low shot of Cliff Knight until he pauses and rewinds to “Party Central”. Knight peers into Damage’s locker room and sees Pain Express, Pondababa and Hardcore Hooligan dancing with strippers. Knight glances over to two dogs licking up the ruminants of the alcohol that toppled over on the ground. He shakes his head in repugnance and further concentrates on his match.)
[What’s on the titantron: A camera slowly swoops around the figure of Cliff Knight one time, as at the end of the final rotation Cliff Knight bashes the camera out of order | cutshot to Cliff Knight winning the 56-man Cross federation tournament | cutshot to Cliff Knight signing autographs for the fans in his futuristic costume | cutshot to Cliff setting up an opponent for a pedigree and then lifting him up and planting his face into the ground with a fameasser.]
(His flashy spiked up yellow-bleached hair can be seen from the nosebleed sections as he struts his stuff down the aisle. He walks right by a hand-cuffed Ixon against the turnbuckle and chuckles in ignorance.)
Rudolph: Here’s a man that’s making a name of himself. He also thinks that he’s the best thing since wrestling. Without a shred of doubt Knight is one of the most talented young superstars to set foot on UWA soil. His hunger for achievements has led him to several other competitions at the time. Isn’t that right, Jimmy? (he looks to his left, but no one is there) Oh that’s right. Jimmy is partying with the younger crowd. He leaves my old withering corpse here. All I can do is just commentate. (singing the great oldies tune “By myself”) I am here… alllll byyyy myyyyself… Here I am.... all by myself…
(The crowd detonates as Cliff Knight extends his arms in the shape of a “V” in the middle of the ring. He points at Rage in the ring and gives him the big thumbs down as the bell chimes. Ding. Ding. Ding.)
(As the sound of the bell sounds Kurt Stone is charging to the ring with a saw in hand. Stone lumbers forward and begins going back and fourth with all his might to try and disconnect his brotherhood friend, the Ixon. After several minutes, the Ixon is detached. He’s a free man! He runs to the back patting Kurt Stone on his back)
(The two immediately attack each other like rabid animals. They grip each other shoulders but Chris Rage has the firmer squeeze. Knight drops on his knees and performs a fireman’s carry. Without a second to waste, he clenches in a standing side chokehold as Rage gasps for oxygen. Rage, with amazing power lifts his 200 plus pound frame only to be caught in a-reverse DDT.
Rudolph: That was Knight’s patented Knight Time. (Jimmy runs back to the commentating booth with Rudolph.
Jimmy: I heard you pouting… Well, I am back. Back Again. Guess who’s back?
Rudolph: Ok, you’re back. Let’s continue on the match, alright?
(Knight wipes off his hands and he grabs Rage by his long strands of greasy black hair. Knight Irish Whips Rage into the ropes and lowers his head for a back body drop. Rage flips into the air and sunset flips Knight with a pinning combination.)
1… (Cliff Knight kicks out!)
Rudolph: Knight kicks out of the sunset flip!
(Knight is the first up to his feet as he slugs Rage a few times with frequent jabs. Rage wipes the sweat off his brow as Knight comes out of nowhere with a running spear into the chest of Chris Rage. Rage falls flat on his face as Knight climbs the middle turnbuckle. Flash photography goes wild as Knight flies in the air like superman, flogging Rage with 10-foot knee drop.)
(Cliff Knight continues his assault by stomping a mud hole into the 3-pack abdomen muscles of Chris Rage. With no expression on his face, Rage innovates his offence with a rake of the eyes. Knight retreats into the ropes until sent straight to hell with a large clothesline by Chris Rage. Knight tumbles onto the proper padding on the exterior of the ring as Rage charges in with a baseball slide connecting into the pretty face of Cliff Knight. Flying back into the railing is a battered Cliff Knight. Rage mounts the top turnbuckle, as Knight in his futuristic clothing remains unconscious on the outside. The fans cheer as Knight’s face illuminates catching Rage with jumping dropkick in his ribs.)
Jimmy: Pllllaying POSSAM! Knight counters Rage’s flying elbow strike with a dropkick right into his ribs!
Knight arrogantly smiles with a smug look on his face throwing Rage into the ring like a lawn dart. Rage drops his head in the set-up position for the Premier Powerbomb. With an incredible burst of strength Rage feels a pain in his back after lifting the Premier Athlete with a back body drop. Knight flips backwards and lands onto the top turnbuckle. Rage turns around in astonishment as Knight jumps and drops Rage face-first into the mat with a-DDT! Knight hooks the leg thinking it’s over.
1…2.. ¼ (The stamina of Chris Rage kicks out!)
(Knight, in a fit of rage, places the head of Rage in the set-up for the Knight’s End. But Rage again flips Knight backwards but he stealthily lands on his feet again. Rage turns around again in awe as Knight boots Rage in the breadbasket. Rage leans forward and is set up again in the position of a pedigree. Rage shows his true power and again weasels his way out of the Knights End.)
Jimmy: That move does not seem to work on Rage; he better have something up his sleeve.
(Rage commences a flurry of elbow strikes of his own and bashes a tired Premier Athlete into the corner. Knight takes shot after shot of bony elbows until he Rage releases the threshold. Knight looks woozy for the moment as Rage raises his hands like he won the match. With dazzling resiliency, Knight starts his engines by trampling the healing body of Chris Rage with a few rights and lefts of his own)
(The fans go wild as Cliff Knight hoists Rage up with a running piledriver! Rage’s skull bounces on the canvas)
1…2…3 (Cliff Knight is victorious over Chris Rage!)
Jimmy: The Knights End wouldn’t work on this chap!
Rudolph: But Knight still managed to defeat the impermeable Chris Rage.
Jimmy: Cliff Knight is winning the undefeated streak race here in the Ultimate Survivor being a total of 4 wins and 0 losses.
Rudolph: Reynolds, CJ Scott, Johnny Damage and The Mortician all remain competitors in this competition!
(Kurt Stone and Ixon show up at the meeting ground…)
Kurt Stone: Okay, we are missing one-third of our brotherhood.
Ixon: Where is Tommie? That’s the question.
Kurt Stone: I suggest we start a search party. Ixon, you search on the east side of the arena. I’ll search on the west side.
(Ixon nods his head and goes in an eastward flow. Kurt Stone rushes in the opposite direction)
Johnny Damage: Hey Pain Express, Cheers to Hardcore, brother.
(Pain Express smiles and departs party central)
[What’s on the titantron: A stationary camera swoops three-sixty degrees around CJ Scott as it shows features such as his long brown pony-tail and his moustache and goatee | cutshot to the current champion of the RWW CJ Scott with the Global Heavyweight Championship belt around his waist | cutshot to CJ Scott signing a few autographs for the fans | cutshot to CJ Scott applying a katai-jamai to a figure that is definitely struggling and hurting from it | cutshot to CJ pinning a figure for the easy 1-2-3]
Rudolph: CJ Scott has a 2-0 record so far! He is one of the big contenders in the undefeated streaks!
Jimmy: Très bien!
(Scott struts down the aisle giving high fives to the anticipating crowd. He shows off the Singapore Cane that he stole from Johnny Damage. He crawls into the ring and flexes his bo-flex muscles to the camera. The girls ooh and awe this muscular man. CJ Scott starts doing the moonwalk all over the ring with Hardcore Hooligan’s Singapore Cane. Hardcore Hooligan gets out of his drunken rage and realizes that his match is starting within minutes! He begins to watch a monitor that is crosshaired in the top corner of his locker room. [On the screen is CJ Scott moonwalking with Hooligan’s Singapore Cane] Hooligan frowns in sheer rage and violently pushes the stripper off his lap.
Hardcore Hooligan: You think that’s funny?!? You think that’s funny CJ Scott? I’ll show you something funny when you ante up my Singapore Cane!
(Hardcore Hooligan grabs his soccer ball receiving an itty-bitty shock from Pondababa’s implanted electrical device. He licks his finger from the ouch and he walks down the aisle with the rugged voice of “Hardcore Hooligan” by Business blaring through the Toronto Skydome)
[What’s on the titantron: A camera swoops around the Hardcore Hooligan as he looks extremely angry. He swats the camera like a fly | cutshot to Hardcore Hooligan is on the top rope with a barbed wire wrapped around his body as a figure is laying upon a table. Hooligan jumps 15 meters out of the air and annihilates the figure by causing extreme pain from the barbed wire | cutshot to Hardcore Hooligan with his WCHW Hardcore belt around his waist | cutshot to Hardcore Hooligan angrily looking at the camera guzzling on a beer | Hardcore Hooligan getting rocked through a table | cutshot to Hardcore Hooligan kicking a barbed wire soccer ball]
(Hardcore Hooligan charges to the ring with a front first baseball slide into the ring. CJ Scott, as if he saw a grizzly bear, rolls out of the ring to take a hiding spot. Johnny Damage is in the center of the ring when the light turns into complete darkness. Smoke is all over the place! The lights flicker on again and Mortician is choking the life juice out of Johnny Damage! CJ Scott smiles on the outside of the ring and he cunningly rolls back into the ring and lays the beats to a staggering Hardcore Hooligan. All of a sudden, Mortician spins 270 degrees and clocks CJ Scott across the neck. Scott does a backwards somersault as Mortician grabs a head full of hair!)
Jimmy: What is CJ Scott thinking? He’s stealing artefacts from the Hardcore Hooligan. Rudy, in terms of strategy, why would CJ Scott do such a thing.
Rudolph: Half the match is fought before the match Jimmy.
Jimmy: Point being?
Rudolph: Well, CJ Scott shows that he has a mental advantage over Hardcore Hooligan because he can steal the Singapore Cane and get away with it.
(Hardcore Hooligan is slowly regaining his composure in the ring as Mortician is brutally laying the boots on CJ Scott. But Hooligan, thinking quickly, hits the big Mortician in the throat. Mortician catches his breath, as Hardcore Hooligan irish whips Mortician into the ropes. It’s reversed and consequently Hooligan is tossed into the ropes. On the return, Mortician places his hand on the throat of Hardcore Hooligan. The Mortician pierces his eyes into those of Hardcore Hooligan and Damage drops to one knee. He squeezes even harder, trying to choke the life out of Damage. Mortician throws Hardcore Hooligan into the turnbuckle as CJ Scott chuckles in the corner.)
Jimmy: I can tell that Hardcore Hooligan wants a piece of CJ Scott this match.
Rudolph: All CJ’s doing is laughing in the corner.
Jimmy: Hardcore Hooligan has to get through the roadblock known as the Mortician to get to CJ Scott!
(Mortician rushes in and immediately grabs the tender throat of Hardcore Hooligan. Hooligan's eyes light up with panic, and he pulls away quickly before the Mortician can follow through. Hooligan lunges forward and rocks the Mortician with a huge lariat. Mortician looks shaken but he kneels down as CJ Scott comes in out of nowhere and stomps the Hardcore Hooligan in his spiky-blue haired skull. Mortician starts his onslaught on CJ Scott who is panicking in the corner. Mortician swiftly comes in and attacks Scott with a full-scaled spear! The crowd roars as CJ Scott tumbles to the mat like a leaf in autumn.)
(Hardcore Hooligan is sneakily crawling to the outside and he begins to chug and power-up by drinking an ice cold Labatts Blue! He swishes the bad-tasting fluid all over his cheeks like a hamster as Mortician is delivering a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker to an unhealthy CJ Scott. Hardcore Hooligan is snarling as he grabs the Mortician just like a bully would and he spits the alcohol in his eyes!)
Jimmy: That’s the Hardcore Hooligan we’ve learned to love!
(Hardcore Hooligan yells “CHEERS, TO HARDCORE”. As quick as the wind, he rushes outside and he chucks a table and a single chair into the ring. CJ Scott looks and rolls out of the ring in a frightened manner. Hardcore Hooligan is quick and experienced at setting up tables and chairs so he does it in a jiffy. Mortician is slowly getting back up to his feet as Hardcore Hooligan raises his hands in the air. Hooligan slaps Mortician across his pale face one time and then he folds up the chair. Mortician holds his hands out and gets whacked with the chair. He stumbles all the way into the corner with the table wedged into the corner.)
Jimmy: We’ve seen this before!
(CJ Scott climbs up onto the ring and starts to yell at the Hardcore Hooligan with his slick British accent talk. Hardcore Hooligan, like a cow with the mad cow disease, folds up the chair and shocks the World by smoking CJ Scott across the forehead! Scott falls like a 20 pound bag of potatoes to the ground as blood oozes from the forehead! He sets up the chair in the ring and he runs with the fans one hundred per cent behind him. Mortician sees it coming though and he scatters in the nick of time of Hooligan’s vaulting body! Hooligan splinters the table and immediately stands on his feet like nothing even happened!)
Rudolph: Did you see that Jimmy! He just crashed into the table and it didn’t even stun him!
(Mortician thinks that he has the advantage until he turns around and notices the Hardcore Hooligan on all twos. Hooligan hoists the goliath up into the air and does a one hundred degree powerbomb crashing the Mortician into the folded chair! Mortician lies in the ring arms flat out as CJ Scott rushes into the ring trying for the official backstab of the century on Johnny Damage. But Damage turns around and flogs CJ Scott in his bare chest. Scott backs up as if he was just hit by a freight train!)
Rudolph: The ring looks like it was hit by a tornado or an earthquake! Triple Threats are lethal here in the Ultimate Survivor!
(Splinters of board are scattered gingerly in the ring, a broker chair is on the ground, Mortician’s body is resting on the mat, ruminants of Hardcore Hooligan’s beer ooze down the white canvas; these are all the observances that a fan would see. But this isn’t what’s important. What’s important is that Johnny Damage is grabbing his Singapore Cane that CJ Scott stole from him! CJ Scott is shaking his head in mercy as Hardcore Hooligan suspends the Singapore Cane across the throat of CJ Scott! Scott squeals as Johnny Damage performs a front leg sweep causing much more damage then a strepped throat ever would!)
(Two bodies lie in the ring, as Hardcore Hooligan ponders to himself; what should I do next? A lightbulb appears above his blue spiky hair as he lightly grabs the soccer ball primarily made of barbed wire. He receives a little shock as he puts it in the center of the ring. He drags the decrepit corpse of CJ Scott and lays him out on the turnbuckle. He grabs his Singapore Cane and he licks his finger once to check the measurements of wind speed and wind direction. Like a golfer would do it, Hardcore Hooligan swings his Singapore Cane into the barbed wire soccer ball at a CJ Scott lying in the corner of the ring. Mortician is out of the way as the Hardcore Hooligan connects with the soccer ball! The electrical current Pondababa placed in the soccer ball erupts and shockwaves Johnny Damage and CJ Scott! Hardcore Hooligan falls to the ground as the electrical current of the soccer ball explodes in the ring and he is knocked out… The ball rushes forward into CJ Scott and he is lightly hurt by the barbed wire and he tumbles forward almost knocked out from the electrical shockwave!!!)
Jimmy: (the audience is almost covered in sparks from the modified soccer ball) What the hell!
Rudolph: (cannot talk)
Jimmy: The shockwave may have short circuited our own microphones or something. This is pandemonium!
[Cutshot to Pondababa robotically laughing at the occuring anarchy in the ring...]
(After several minutes of three wrestlers on the ground in pain and suffering, Mortician-battered and bruised- pins CJ Scott.)
1…2…3 (CJ Scott is pinned, he goes onto next weeks IME)
Jimmy: THIS IS CHAOS AT ITS BEST!
(After a short rest, these wrestlers get the treatment they rightfully deserved with the free health care system of Toronto, Ontario. They all leave with a couple of bruises and are okay to fight in the future…)
(Backstage: Kurt Stone and The Icon JT Dolar are wandering around searching for the missing Tommie Gunn. After a thorough search, the two head back the the Brotherhood locker room.)
Stone: Man, I guess Tommie was too scared to go out and compete on his own tonight.
Sure, I went out alone, I got beat, but who cares. I like drinking alcahol.
JT Dolar: I don’t know man. Gunn wouldn’t just run out like a punk bitch.
Stone: yeah, he has “Special Effects” flowing through him. He wouldn’t leave.
Dolar: Listen, I’m just gonna grab my gear and get ready for the match.
(Dolar opens his locker and inside is TOMMIE GUNN! He is hung upside down, and barely conscious. He mumbles a few incoherent words and Dolar quickly unties Gunn. Tommie flops to the ground and there is a note attached around his neck. Stone screams when he sees Gunn lying on the floor. Dolar grabs the note and reads it.)
JT Dolar: For those who decide to cross a man who knows no boundaries when revenge is concerned. Tommie Gunn just another victim at the hands of the Mortician.
(JT Dolar crinkles up the paper and turns to Kurt Stone.)
JT Dolar: Kurt, you have to go find Mortician and exact revenge while me an’ Tommie
go out and bust a few heads in the cage match tonight.
Stone: [Gulp] Okay JT, I’ll try and find that bastard. No promises though, he probably
got scared and left the arena.
Dolar: Whatever... You find him, and you break his head off.
(With that, JT Dolar turns to his locker and says: “It time to kick a little ass.” JT helps the injured Tommie Gunn put his wrestling trunks on and the two head to the entrance area.)
[The Pain Express, Tommie Gunn, JT Dolar, Zang, Uluz, and Chris Copeland head to ringside and wait for the cage to lower down and become affixed to the ring.]
Rudolph: There is so much great talent in the ring here tonight. It’s a shame one of these
men will have to go home with a thirteenth place billing, and two-thousand dollars in his
pocket.
Jimmy: Yeah, Pain Express came into the UWA Survivor late and he is forced to
compete in the Immunity Main Event because of the man he replaced.
Rudolph: I think the edge here tonight will go to the Brotherhood of Chaos team mates Jt
Dolar, and Tommie Gunn, but bear in mind, Mortician exacted revenge on both of these
men tonight, he beat on JT while he was handcuffed to the guardrail, and we found
Tommie severely beaten in a locker tonight. Does Mortician have something in store for
Kurt Stone tonight?
Jimmy: Well Mortician is definately proving that you don’t want to mess with him.
Rudolph: Uluz, the great African prodigee has his back against the wall again
tonight.
Jimmy: Plus Copeland is in the ring with him. Will they work together? Or turn on each
other?
Rudolph: Last but definately not least, Zang. That guy flew from Washington to Toronto
in a stolen police chopper. Apparently he dropped The Old Man off at a hospital before
getting to the arena, so that means he’s all on his own for tonights match.
(The bell rings and Copeland backs into the corner. He watches as people pair up and begin to battle. Zang is confronted by Tommie Gunn and JT Dolar. The two pummel him against the corner and Pain Express uses this chance to attack the already sore Tommie Gunn from behind.)
(Two Brotherhood men go round Zang outside, round Zang outside. JT Dolar taps into his alter ego Ixon and begins to stomp. Guess who’s back? Back again, Ixon’s back, back again. Ixon’s back, Ixon’s back, Ixon’s back...)
(The two larger men collide in the center of the ring trading blows like two rabid grizzly bears. Tommie decides to rest against the ropes, but Pain Express decides to take advantage as he lands a solid elbow ot the base of Gunn’s skull. Pain follows up by whipping Gunn against the steel cage.)
(Meanwhile, in the other corner, Uluz and Chris Copeland seem to be having a heart to heart. Uluz looks upset, and Copeland looks as though he’s trying to explain something to the African gentleman. Gunn’s tumbles into the two and Pain Express chases Gunn into the corner and stomps him down. fueling his fire, he gives a disturbingly strong backhand to Uluz’s chest and Uluz falls to the ground. Uluz is in shock on the ground on all fours, when Chris Copeland runs and uses Uluz’s back as a large step. In two graceful moves, Copeland gets to the top of the cage and waves goodbye to the other wrestlers as he easily escapes the madness in the steel cage.)
[Chris Copeland is the first to escape the Steel Cage!]
Rudolph: I must say, I am so impressed with Copeland’s gameplan. He has successfully
avoided even being touched over the course of two cards.
Jimmy: He will be very fresh for the next card!
(The other wrestler’s didn’t even notice the stylish escape of Chris Copeland as he struts backstage. All except for Uluz, who shakes his head in dissapointment. As his attention is focused on Copeland, Pain Express hammers him from behind as well. Gunn is glad that Pain Express has shifted attacks to someone else.)
(In the middle of the ring, Ixon and Zang have each other in bearhug’s, and neither refuses to give the extra leverage to the other.)
(Uluz mimics a snake and coils around Pain Express applying a sleeper with his legs, while balancing upside down against the ropes. Gunn boots Pain Express in the gut, and the beefy man seems fazed. Uluz continues to choke Pain Express and the big man falls to his knees. Gunn continues to kick away at Pain Express’ belly. Eventually Pain Express falls and Uluz releases his grip. The African Import turns to Tommie Gunn, and rushes in like a rhino. Uluz forces Gunn into the corner and when the impact occurs, Uluz uses the momentum to flip himself in a sommersault up Tommie’s body and wraps his leg’s around Tommie Gunn and then reverses polarity to deliver a hurricaranna!)
Rudolph: I’m more and more surprised by Uluz as each week passes.
Jimmy: Well there’s no doubt, there will be many dissapointed fans if Uluz doesn’t win
this whole shebang!
(Pain Express snickers to himself because no one noticed him get to the top of the cage. But with the speed of a cheetah, and the agiltiy of a monkey, Uluz gets to the top of the cage and delivers a reverse Huricaranna to Pain Express as the Indiana Terminator as the big man plummets onto Zang and Ixon! Zang gains the upper hand after the bump and delivers a judo-style takedown! Ixon’s is crushed to the mat and his air is forced out.)
(Uluz had hung on to the steel rungs, and mounted himself back to the top of the cage. Uluz performs the African Swallow Dive - a spinning missile dropkick- as Pain Express makes a feeble attempt to rise to his feet. Pain Express falls back to the ground and Uluz begins to hammer the canvas like an ape.)
(Tommie Gunn tries to climb the cage but feels too weak to make an escape. Uluz looks like he has rabies as he contiues his warpath. Pain Express now climbs the steel cage again, albeit a lot more hurt from the last few moments of carnage at the hands of Uluz. This time Pain Express gets up and over the top of the cage, but loses his grip and falls 15 feet to freedom. Some fans laugh at his misfortune, but Pain Express is still the second man to earn freedom.)
[Pain Express earns Immunity.]
Jimmy: Somehow after recieving a reverse huricaranna off the top rope and a spinning
missile dropkick, Pain Express has made it over the top of the cage!
Rudolph: That guy can sure take a beating, he even fell off the top of the cage to the
outside! WHAT A GUY!
(Pain Express folds up a chair and tosses it over the top of the cage with a snicker. It lands beside Tommie Gunn, who considers it a gift from god. Tommie holds it up and prepares to whack whoever gets in front of him. Uluz sees an opening and performs a spinning kick, which whacks the chair into Gunn’s head. Uluz grabs the chair and places it over by the corner.)
(Uluz is in one corner with Gunn, and Zang is in the other corner with Ixon. Gunn and Ixon try to Irish whip Uluz and Zang together, but the two reverse it and the two Brotherhood of Chaos members crash together. Gunn hits the ground, but Ixon is still on his feet. Uluz and Zang charge at him. Ixon ducks down and Uluz jumps up, he jumps off of Ixon’s back, then off of Zang’s head to the top of the cage! Uluz shimmies down to the ground and avoids elimination!)
[Uluz earns Immunity!]
Ruolph: Is it me? or did Uluz just run off of Ixon and Zang like stairs!?
Jimmy: Yeah, that crazy man is sure agile!
(Zang is alone in the ring with the two Brotherhood members! Ixon grabs the chair and smashes Zang with it. Zang tumbles back like a stunned beast. Gunn clotheslines Zang and and Ixon nails Zang with the chair again! Zang gets up, but looks shaken to his innards, JT quickly applies his finisher, a cobra clutch side russian leg sweep and Zang goes motionless! Ixon gets another cheap shot in with the chair and commands Tommie Gunn to perform his finisher The Special Effect of the top of the cage!)
(Tommie Gunn gets to the top of the cage and flies through the air like an eagle. Tommie executes the frog splash to pinpoint perfection as he crashes down on Zang’s body!)
(Ixon and Tommie Gunn tiredly begin to climb the cage as the fans begin to cheer! Tommie Gunn turns to Ixon halfway up the cage.
Gunn: They like us... They really like us!
(Ixon looks looks back and his face looks like he just bit into a lemon! The fans cheer louder as Gunn turns around... Zang is on his feet waiting for the two to turn around! In a panic, Ixon backhands Gunn and climbs to the top of the cage! Gunn is helpless as Zang grabs his by the back of the neck and delivers a spinning reverse chokeslam! Tommie Gunn convulses on the ground as Zang lifts him up and props him in the corner! At this time, Ixon touches the ground outside.)
[Ixon earns immunity!]
Rudolph: It would appear that Ixon has just turned his back on the Brotherhood of
Chaos!
Jimmy: And look at the result! Zang is going to end Tommie’s career!
(In the ring, Zang delivers a huge backbreaker that nearly folds Gunn in half! Zang grabs the chair and smashes it over Tommie’s head! The chair folds to a ninety degree angle and Gunn isn’t even conscious anymore! Zang grabs Gunn by his feet and begins to spin in circles! After the momentum has lifted Gunn off the ground, Zang releases and Gunn collides against the steel rungs like a crash test dummy. People are unsure if Gunn is even breathing in the ring.)
(Zang climbs the ring and gets out.)
[Zang earns immunity!]
Rudolph: Good god, I think Tommie Gunn is dead!
Jimmy: Paramedics are rushing into the ring to check on the state of “Special Effects”
Tommie Gunn.
Rudolph: Zang should be fined for his action in the ring tonight, that was completly
unnecessary!
Jimmy: The paramedics seem to be hesitant to move Mister Gunn is case of a spinal
injury.
Rudolph: Two-thousand dollards hardly seems adequate for Gunn after what he has just
endured, that was like being mauled by a bear.
Jimmy: We send a heartfelt farewell to Tommie Gunn. God help you.
(Backstage: Stone is searching around the darkest corridors of the arena and he only has a candle for light. Suddenly, the light goes out and Stone screams and begins to run. As he runs away, his feather boa gets caught under his feet and he tumbles to the ground. He appears in the light where a camera can see him ans Stone sighs as he reaches the light again. Then, Motician appears out of the shadows and pulls Stone back into the darkness. A slight struggle can be heard as Stone flies back out of the shadows as he recieves the Death Penatly, an inverse powerbomb onto the concrete. The Cameraman is frozen with fear as Mortician rushes in and delivers a big boot to the camera and the show goes off the air.)