Prince Stefan
	“Steffie!” Stefan cringed at the sound of Brian’s high-pitched cooing. That tone was always indicative of some sort of terrible new fate. Like the time Brian had decided that they should get matching shirts that read: *Princess in Training*. Stefan winced at the memory. Or the bumper sticker Brian had gotten for Stefan’s car. His beautiful baby Jeep Commander’s bumper had been horridly maimed by the logo “*Homoironic*”. “What is it Brian?” “Steffie, love! I got you a present!” Stefan closed his eyes as his worst fears were confirmed, and put down the magazine he was flipping through. “What kind of present?” “A really great one!” Brian plopped down on the couch across from Stefan, holding a garishly bright lime green polka dotted gift bag. The tissue paper poking out from the bag was hot pink. “Why?” “Why not?” Having no reason he could say out loud without crushing the tetchy little midget, Stefan remained silent. “See!” Brian said smugly. “You can’t think of anything! So you have to open it now!” He stretched out his short arms offering the bag to Stefan. Fearing the worst, Stefan took the bag, and set it down in his lap. Brian looked on eagerly as Stefan poked at the lurid pink tissue, and then reached into the bag and pulled out an oddly rectangular and *pink* box…Stefan gaped at the white insignia on the box and then let his eyes fall to the name. It was a Barbie. It was a Barbie named Prince Stefan. “And look Stef!” Brian said excitedly. He pulled another doll out of the black bag he had and held it forward. It was a Barbie of the female variety in a puffy white 80’s looking wedding dress, but the hair had been mercilessly hacked off, and painted black with what Stefan assumed was magic marker. “It’s Repunzel, and she marries Prince Stefan, but her hair was all off so I had to cut it for her.” He beamed at Stefan. Stefan staring back down at the pink box didn’t quite know what to say. Of all the gifts he had received in his life…this was just—he laughed. Brian’s face fell, and the Barbie he was holding, dropped limply back to his lap. “I thought you’d like them.” He said sadly. Stefan tried to control his laughter. He moved the Barbie and extended his arms to Brian. “I do like them Molks. In fact I love them.” He laughed. “I think they’re brilliant.” Brian’s face lit up so fast, one would have assumed he’d just been offered sex with David Bowie. He scampered out of his chair and leapt into Stefan’s lap. Stefan hugged him and planted a kiss on his lightly glossed lips. “They go together.” Brian explained. “And see how they actually spelled your name right? I thought it was so amazing I just *had* to buy it for you! Unfortunately the Repunzel was very ugly…and quite slutty too.” Stefan laughed uproariously. “Why don’t you wear dresses like that in real life, Molks?” Stefan teased poking the Repunzel doll. Brian stuck his tongue out. “Very funny.” He paused and then giggled. “Do you know they had a black Prince Stefan?” Stefan snorted. “I almost got you that one, but then I thought Steve might get jealous…you know him wanting to be black and all?” Stefan dissolved into another bout of hysterical laughter. “It’s not funny!” Brian said sternly. “It’s quite serious! I’m very concerned about him!” Stefan shook his head, his eyes closed, and tears of hilarity seeping onto his lashes. Brian pouted at his boyfriend, putting his hands on his hips. “You’re so immature Stefan.” He sighed. Stefan’s eyes snapped open. “*I’m* immature?” He asked in astonishment. Brian nodded. “Yes. Very.” “Bri, honey, angel face…you’re the one who just bought me a Barbie doll.” Brian opened his mouth to retort but nothing came out. “Touché.” He said finally, shrugging. “So I think we should put them on the mantle. And that way everyone can see them when they come over! Oh and Steffy? I’ve decided we’re going to go as Repunzel and Prince Stefan to the Halloween party. Won’t that be great?” He beamed at him, and smacked his lips against Stefan’s. Stefan waited until Brian had leapt out of his lap and snatched up the Barbie’s, before smacking his forehead with the palm of his hand.
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