by: VanessaSky
disclaimer: Joss Whedon lucky bastard
distribution: Amnesia, Anybody else Want Take let me know you Have
paring: b/a
rating: pg I guess
summary: What if forever wasn't the point?
lyrics: What Might Have Been by Little Texas. Lyrics in Italics.
an: ok no I repeat NO Dawn, Connor, Riley, or Parker, and Buffy didn't sleep with Spike. When Angel left he really left. He never came back. It's Buffy's 26th birthday. They made a pact to meet in the middle.
feedback: I need it like candy.
------------
It was a clear night. Very beautiful. This was the night they had waited for for 8 years. Just to see if they could make it. If they could live without the other. More he wanted to see if he could live without her. It proved very difficult.
"You came." She nodded. "You too." He shrugged. It was somehow awkward for them to be in this position. To be in this close of range to each other. They had both forgotten. The power. Love.
He opened his mouth then closed it again. "You look..good." She tired to smile. "So do you." The awkward silence came upon them again. "Have you been thinking about me or this." He wanted to know if she had been waiting for this. Counting down the seconds like he had.
Sure, I think about you now and then,
But it's been a long, long time.
"Yes, I have." He finally met her eyes, and realized the reason he had been avoiding them. Her tears flowed freely down her cheeks. Cascading down the tip of her nose and chin, and landing either on her shirt or the ground.
"I've been trying to do what you asked me too. The moving on."
I've got a good life now, well, I've moved on
So when you cross my mind,
"Oh, have you been...how's that coming along." She hurriedly wiped her tears away. "Not as well as expected." He looked away from her guilty.
I try not to think about what might have been
'Cos that was then and we have taken different roads
We can't go back again, there's no use giving in
And there's no way to know what might have been
"Why did you leave?" that question had been on her mind for 8 years. She wasn't sure she wanted an answer now.
He wasn't prepared to give her one. The reason's he had so forefront in his mind all that time ago now seemed to vanish. He couldn't remember why he left her behind. Why he didn't come back for her.
We could sit and talk about this all night long,
And wonder why we didn't last.
"I thought we where forever," the tears returned not only to her eyes but his as well. His lack of breath caught in his throat. "So did I."
"But weren't we happy? In love?" She had to lean against her car as she asked him these things. These things she had buried under her heart so she would never think of them again. Of him again. Isn't that what he wanted.
He looked down feeling ashamed and guilty. More so than he had in years. "We where."
Yes, they might be the best days we will ever know
But we'll have to leave them in the past.
"But I couldn't let you..." Her hand rasing up effectively stopped his speech. She didn't want to hear the reason's he had used so long ago for why they couldn't be together now.
I try not to think about what might have been
'Cos that was then and we have taken different roads
We can't go back again, there's no use giving in
And there's no way to know what might have been
He walked over to her. Making it there in 3 strides, and grabbed her by her shoulders. He pulled her roughly against him. "Do you think I've been happy away from you? You think if I wasn't next to you, and something where to happen that I could stand it?"
"I didn't think you loved me anymore," she replied while wrenching herself away from his grasp. "What was I supposed to think when you left. You didn't want to stay then, and what if you had? Do you think about that?"
"What might have been? Did you think about that when you walked away?"
He looked away from her, and stared at the beauty of the moon. "No."
That same old look in your eyes;
It's a beautiful night,
I'm so tempted to stay.
Click to Continue
Click to Return to Buffy/Angel Index
Click to Return Home