Mother - a true freak of nature, takes 'fussy' to a whole new level, has no real 'friends' as such, just people she can tell rumors about to other 'friends'. Doesn't like her two sons to have real friends because it interferes with study/work and she wants to be able to brag about us. My brother and I are never 'good enough' for her and there are constant arguments.

Graham - another, totally different, freak of nature, thinks that drinking is bad (if he knew about the things my bro and I take...) he's an old 'eat your liver, kidney, brain and other tripe' fat, egotistical, arrogant prick who thinks everyone but him is a dickhead (which is probably true). It takes a hell of a lot to impress him, or just my mother who he uses for sex but she's too wrapped up in him to see it.

My Brother - a sports nut, druggo, tall, handsome (not in the gay way) basket ball player. Has one job at the moment but is usually juggling three. Stressed out all the time because he lives with Mum and Graham and can't have parties or have fun in general.