Chapter 34
Later that evening...
"Well, I'm gonna head up to bed." Nyla announced standing and stretching.
They hadn't really done much, spent most of their time downstairs. Nyla did a little reading and writing and Nick did some work on writing for the guys' new album and other things. The time seemed to go faster than either expected. They ate a little and soon became so caught up in their activities they didn't realize night had fallen.
"Me too, god, I think my leg fell asleep." Nick moaned standing and shaking his leg out.
Nyla struggled not to laugh, "It's your own fault ya know, I don't know how many times I told you not to sit like that, but you do anyway."
"Yeah yeah." Nick muttered, gathering his stuff and starting upstairs after her. "Well, I hope you sleep well."
"Thanks, you too. Night Nick."
"Night Nyla."
Nyla turned and walked into her room and froze, literally. It was extremely cold in her room, so cold the windows were fogged up. Walking over, she checked to see if there was some crack or anything letting the cold air in, but there was nothing. It was cold before, but never like this, it had to be below zero.
She could already feel her body starting to shake, her teeth chattering. She had to get under the covers. Staying fully dressed, she slipped under the covers and called out in shock, the sheets were even colder than normal. She exhaled loudly and was shocked to see a plume of smoke escape her lips. "I-I can't...b-believe this. I'm gonna freeze." She moaned, shivering harder. There was a soft knock at the door and she struggled to respond, it seemed to take too much energy to talk.
"Nyla?"
"C-come in." She called out weakly.
Nick opened the door, a blanket wrapped around him and smiled at her. "You look how I feel. I just heard the weather, the temperature has dropped below zero."
She groaned, her eyes drifting shut. "I don't think I've ever been so cold in my life Nick."
"I know. Look Nyla, I was thinking, why don't we sleep together?"
Slowly she opened her eyes, looking at him.
"For body heat, it'll help."
At this point she didn't care, she just wanted to get warm. "O-ok."
Nick nodded and made his way over, lying down on top of the covers.
Slowly Nyla rolled over looking at him in confusion. "Nick, what are you doing?"
"What do you mean?"
Now that he was closer, she could see that his teeth were chattering softly as well. "Why are you ontop of the covers?"
"I didn't wanna ya know...just assume anything, make you uncomfortable." He shrugged.
"H-how would we get w-warm if you're out there Nick? Now c-come on, we're mature adults, we can be mature about this. Now get under the covers."
"Nyla..."
"Under the covers Carter." She insisted, moving back a bit, giving him room. He hesitated a moment before pushing the covers back and slipping under, setting the other blanket over them and snuggled under.
"Ok, t-that's better. Whew" She managed to breathe, her eyes drifting shut.
"Wow, didn't think it'd be this bad." Nick whispered, turning towards her, unable to stop himself from looking at her.
She nodded; slowly opening her eyes, their gazes locking. She felt her heart drop, all those familiar feelings came rushing back. She swallowed hard, fighting back the urge to reach out and touch his face, and she wanted to so badly.
His mouth had suddenly gone dry, how long had it been since he'd looked into her eyes? Really looked? It felt like it'd been an eternity. Just when he thought it was gone, that connection was still there, not as strong as it used to be, but there nonetheless. He felt something, that wall around his heart starting to break and it was just like old times, laying there, looking into each other's eyes, talking with their hearts.
You look in my eyes
And I get emotional inside
I know it's crazy
But you still can touch my heart
She wanted to say that she wasn't shocked that after all this time, he could look at her and she'd still feel that nervous fluttering in her stomach, but she was, she truly was. It was as if nothing had changed, like time had never passed. It felt so natural to be here with him right now, looking into his eyes and him into hers. It felt comfortable; it felt like...home.
It was still there after all this time, but he wasn't surprised, he knew it would be. Nothing had changed like she said it had. It was just a matter of time before they both saw that all the feelings were still there, stronger than ever. And he knew that the time would come where they'd have to face up to them. And after all this time
You'd think that I
I wouldn't feel the same
But time melts into nothing
And nothing's changed
"Nick...I..." She started.
"Yes?"
What could she say? What could she possibly say right now to him to make him understand? "I just...I just wanted to thank you for earlier, I didn't mean to spaz out on you like that, I'm just a bit frustrated."
"It's ok, nothing to thank me for, I understand, it's starting to get to me too." He smiled.
She groaned, rubbing at her forehead. "Thank you Nick."
"You're welcome Nyla." He whispered.
She looked up at him, licking her lips, her breath caught and she stilled when she saw his gaze drift to her lips.
I still believe, someday you and me
Will find ourselves in love again
I had a dream, someday you and me
Will find ourselves in love again
"Nyla...are you...happy? Seriously happy?" Nick murmured, slowly bringing his gaze back up to her eyes.
"I...I am happy Nick, I'm really trying to be."
He nodded, "I want for you to be happy Ny, I really do."
"I want for you to be happy too Nick."
He started to say something then stopped, reaching out to brush a stray piece of hair from her face. "I know."
Each day of my life
I'm filled with all the joy I could find
Why did she feel like there could be more? That they had another chance at...what? She shook her head; it was too late for that now, much too late. Too much time had passed and they were different people now, they had moved on with their lives and they both had someone else. That aside, she felt herself longing, desperate for something else, something she couldn't define. Something that lie in the eyes she stared into now.
If only he knew there was some guarantee, something that let him know she felt the same way, that maybe it was wrong, that they'd find their way back to each other again. He'd hold on to that hope, hold tight and never let go, it was all he had.
You know that I am not the desperate type
If there's one spark of hope left in my grasp
I'll hold it with both hands
It's worth the risk of burning to have a second chance
"I guess, we should try to get some sleep then." She whispered, looking down briefly then back into his eyes.
"Yeah, ok. Are you warm enough?" He asked softly.
She hadn't even realized that she'd stopped shivering, she was now surrounded by welcomed heat. "Yes, I'm ok thanks."
He nodded.
"Well, good night Nick." She whispered.
"Good night Nyla."
No, no, no, no, no, no I need you baby
I still believe that we can be together
If we believe that true love never has to end
Then we must know that we will love again
They both rolled over, their backs to each other. Each wanting desperately to be in each other's arms, but that wasn't possible and it wasn't right.
Nyla closed her eyes, trying to relax enough to sleep, but she was too aware, to aware of the man lying next to her. Too aware of his body, of his scent, of him to let herself relax enough to sleep. No, she need the comfort of his arms, the comfort of him, but she wouldn't have it, she'd never have it again.
Nick groaned inwardly, his arms ached to hold her, he needed her to sleep he realized. He was aware of everything. The way her body stretched out along the bed, he knew every inch of her body, had memorized it. Her sent, her touch, everything, this was torture.
He'd run off hope, that hope that one day they'd be in love again, maybe years from now or maybe even in another life, they'd find each other again, he believed in that.
Finally a short time later, they both drifted off.
I still believe, someday you and me
Will find ourselves in love again
I had a dream, someday you and me
Will find ourselves in love again.
I Still Believe- By Mariah Carey
