ATF
“Why did the pirates buy
corn on the cob at the grocery store?” JD asked. Not waiting for an answer, he said, “It was
only a buck an ear!”
No one laughed.
“A peg-legged dog walks
into a tavern. He looks around and says,
“I be lookin’ for the man who shot my paw!”
Still no
response.
“Aw,
c’mon! That’s funny!”
Buck slapped his roommate
upside the head.
Ahead in the ticket line, Vin growled. “JD, I want to see this movie as much as you
do, but you tell one more Pirate joke, I’ll make you walk the plank!”
OW – (300 words)
“Okay, Ezra; high, low,
high, then a quick slash at the ribs. Buck,
you block. Swing left then
bring it down in a smooth arc to block the lower blow. Get under him, so his last hit
don’t disarm you, then jump back.”
Buck frowned. “I don’t attack?”
“Not yet. Just get out of the way.”
“Don’t seem right,” he
commented.
Nathan smiled. “If you ain’t there to hit, you don’t get
hurt. Ezra falls off balance, and that
gives you a chance to strike.”
“Sensible,” Ezra declared,
taking up his stance again.
Nathan’s defeat of his own
skills during Buck’s schooling to swordfight Don Paulo had inspired Ezra to request
lessons. It had been somewhat
humiliating, but he believed in learning from the best and Nathan had been
surprisingly gracious in agreeing.
After recovering from his wounds, Buck had decided to join them and it
had become an enjoyable weekly tradition; Buck and Ezra increasing their skill
and Nathan taking the chance to replace bad memories with good.
“Slow,” Nathan directed.
The two swordsmen obeyed, then repeated the exercise faster, then faster again. Buck whooped in triumph when he finally
scored a hit.
Rubbing a hand over his
ribs, which had been solidly thwacked with the flat of the saber, Ezra smiled
ruefully. “We’ll make a swashbuckler of
you yet, Mister Wilmington.”
“A
what?” Buck asked, brow crinkling in puzzlement at
the term.
“Swashbuckler. A blustering swaggering fighting man, expert at battling with sword
or fist.”
“Think he’s already got
that first part down,” Nathan quipped.
Buck looked vaguely
insulted as the other two laughed, but then he grinned. “The ladies do love a
little swagger.”
Watching Buck rotate his
pelvis in graphic demonstration, Ezra rolled his eyes. “Let’s
get back to work, shall we?”
Nathan agreed. “Okay, now . . .”
Little Ezra
“Aarrrr!”
Vin came quickly at the unexpected cry. “Ezra? You okay?”
The child turned, calmly
removing a cloth patch from his eye.
Beside him, a small dog wagged its tail; the only part not wound in
layers of clothesline.
“What are you doing?” Vin asked.
Pointing from an empty
soda bottle and pile of small change to the beagle, Ezra replied, “This knave
drank the rum and absconded with my treasure.”
“Gonna
hang ‘im?”
“No. Privateers are coming. I’ll need every
fighting man.”
Vin received a delighted grin as he picked up a
plastic sword and saluted. “Aye aye, captain.”
ATF
“A Boston Sidecar for JD,
light on the rum,” Josiah said, gaining a grin from the young
“For
Nathan, a LifeSaver.”
Nathan laughed and raised
his drink. “Thanks.”
Josiah continued, “For
Ezra, a Lucky Lady.”
“Always the best kind,”
the southerner quipped.
“Buck, here’s your Horny
Goat.”
JD spewed his drink as
everyone else guffawed.
“For
Vin, a Pirate’s Friend.”
Vin nudged Chris.
“Reckon that must be you.”
“And for
Chris and myself, a little Devil’s Poison.”
The seven clinked their glasses and drank, each enjoying the booty
from a case of smuggling evidence that had gone unclaimed.
Note: I know they
wouldn’t really be able to claim evidence, but it sounded like fun! <g> And for the curious, this is what the
boys are actually drinking:
Boston
Sidecar = light rum, triple sec, lemon juice, combined into an ice shaker
and strained into a martini glass. (Bittersweet and
mild.)
LifeSaver = coconut rum, melon liqueur, pineapple
juice, mix with ice and strain into a cocktail glass. Add cherry if desired. (Sweet and
tropical.)
Lucky Lady =
light rum, anisette, white creme de cocoa, cream,
blend with ice until smooth and pour into a margarita glass. (Rich and sweet.)
Horny Goat =
Bacardi Limon (rum), 7 up, splash of cranberry juice over ice. (Fresh and
tangy)
Pirate's Friend aka Grog = dark rum and water stirred together and served
in an old-fashioned glass. (Simple but strong.)
Devil's Poison =
half Jack Daniels whiskey, half Bacardi rum, shaken over ice and strained into
a shot glass (A basic knock-you-on-your-ass drink.)