Consummate
You want to know a funny thing? I’ve made an appointment to be kissed. Yeah, how scary huh? Then again, scheduling is looking to be more important than ever these days, what with Yamato’s band rehearsals, my soccer practices and sporadic upheavals in the digiworld. Hell, I was lucky enough to find a good half hour of free time between the two of us.
You want to know something else? It’s my first kiss. Yamato says it’s a big deal for him too cause it’ll ‘consummate’ our relationship, whatever that means. Sure, I could look it up, but that would be well…effort. Completely unacceptable. So I’ll take his word for it and maybe I’ll figure out what it means when we do it. Or maybe I won’t and I’ll end up pretending that I know what it means and bullshitting my way through. Sounds like a good plan, ne?
Can you tell I’m nervous? Well, I am. Mr. Cool has officially become a walking, stumbling, air headed, menace to society. It’s all I can do to stop myself from absently running into the randomly placed trashcans, students and teachers in the halls not to mention the occasional support column. If this were some half thought out American comedy, there’d be two guys holding a large plate of glass ahead of me, spanning the width of the hall just so I could conveniently smack face into it and end up dazed and bleeding on the ground. Of course, then I’d need the nasally, ‘ow, my nose!’ comment or the scene would just lose its novelty value. But I’m getting off track…
I guess you can say it’s strange that we’re doing this on school grounds, on the roof to be exact. I’ll be the first to admit that it’s not romantic or that kind of stuff, but I’ve never really had the heart for romance, or the stomach either. Yamato took me to a fancy restaurant once, and we all but ended up having a food fight; fortunately, short-grained rice doesn’t fling too well. Don’t tell the waiter that though, he thought it was a very good threat I made. Got us quick drink refills too; score one for me and my idiocy.
You know, kissing has always been one of those strange things that you sort of want, but not really. Okay, that didn’t make much sense, but it’s true. The kiss is basically pressing mouths together, maybe a tongue or two and then some exchange of spit. Disgusting, isn’t it? But then it’s supposed to be this great, perfect thing and you can’t help but ask ‘why?’ Of course, Yamato says that it’s a pleasurable intense feeling, an important part of any relationship. He should know, being the womanizer he is. To think, if I hadn’t spilled my guts to him, he’d probably be groping some girl right now instead of gearing up to make out with his best friend. Funny, how things turn out right?
Now, Yamato. You know him; the kind of looks and personality that could very easily be classified under ‘naturally seductive’. They say opposites attract, part of which I guess could be true. I have giant unruly hair and his has that ‘not even a monsoon will move this’ quality. Then I’m very loud and annoying and he’s quieter and charming. But we’re both very social, me in my in-your-face way and him in that ‘I’m so mysterious’ way. Still, a far cry from looking like soulmates. I always wondered what he really saw in me besides unabashed sexiness. That’s right, you heard me. He laughed at that too, a little insulting if you think about it, but he has a beautiful laugh so all was forgiven. He said I had all this kindness and loyalty and that junk. Really, I never knew I was such a great person. I’ll have to keep that in mind next time I say something really, really tactless. Mental note: don’t give Mimi an honest answer when she asks about her hair…again.
So back to why I’m currently staring at myself in the boy’s room mirror. Well, that should be obvious. Trust me, it’s nothing to do with any last minute preening, as if I could possibly do something with my hair, or my face anyway. Nope, it’s just reinforcement. Still trying to work out all this relationship stuff. Emotional attachment is a very frightening thing when you have no idea what the hell you’re doing. It just about killed me to learn to hold hands, and that’s like child’s play in the whole scheme of things. So just why am I staring at my reflection? It’s nice every now and then to look at myself and see that I haven’t changed too much, like mutated into some simpering schoolgirl or something. God, that would suck a lot.
A quick glance at my watch and I’ve got another ten minutes. Time for last minute confessions. The appointment was made over a week ago. Since then, I’ve had this alternating recurring daydream/nightmare haunting me. The daydream involves me kissing Yamato deeply. We’re hugging each other and kissing, normal stuff you see everyday. All together a very good image. Then the twisted part of my psyche retaliates by changing Yamato into a giant mouth that picks me up between its teeth and bites me in two. Yeah, um, that could be something important to a psychologist later on.
Another admission. I’ve been very methodical over this kiss. I’ve actually made a list; very professional of me don’t you think? Just ignore the fact that it’s written on two-ply school regulation toilet paper. Anyway, the list is on what I think the kiss will be like. There’s ‘warm’ and ‘wet’ and some stupid part of me put down ‘magical.’ I still blush when I think about that moment of irrationality. What the hell happened? It must be Yamato. Always reaffirming his feelings for me. Damn, if I can’t help but feel loved. Stupid warm, sappy emotions.
Okay, last secret. I’ve been abusing chapstick this whole week. So it’s not too big a deal, but I needed to tell someone. I’ve never used it before. Kami-sama knows how strange it is, that warm oiliness and the self-conscious feeling that it’s a very girly thing to do. Plus it’s cherry flavoured and red. Couldn’t go for a manly, yellowish unflavoured, could you Taichi?
Alright then, all confessions have been made. Time to go do this. Wish me luck, won’t you?
So he’s late. Like five minutes, but still… And he criticizes me on punctuality, the hypocrite. And like the lovestruck teenager I am, I stare at the roof door and fantasize about how he’ll look when he opens it. Which is rather stupid when you realize that this is just after school and he’s probably wearing his uniform like I am. Green blazer, white shirt, gray slacks…well, that ruined the mood.
I turn around to look out over the grounds again, nothing but…uh, school. When I turn back, he’s suddenly standing there in the doorway. Green jacket? Check. White shirt? Yep. Gray slacks? Affirmative. I wish I didn’t have to be right so often. Oh well, my list never said anything about fashion. “So Yama, you ready to blow my world?”
His mouth curves into one of those smiles that makes my insides toasty and gooey. Man, if he could patent it, we’d be so fucking rich. He’s suddenly right upon me, face inches from mine and smiling and looking dazed. At least, I’m not the only one. He talks and his breath is moist against my cheek. “I’ve waited a long time for this Taichi…”
I don’t answer because he leans forward and kisses me. It’s open mouthed, warm, tingly, fuzzy, lots of little things that I hadn’t thought of to put on my list. There’s the faint taste of cherry chapstick and I can swear I know what he ate for lunch. I’ll never think of fries the same way again. The feeling goes beyond our mouths too, his arms circling around my waist, mine snug around his neck. We both move our fingers in tantalizing circles. Mmm…that’s good. Damn, I’m gonna cut this short. Got better things to do, right?
So how’s the kiss overall? I think it’s just plain magical.
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