| Squinn. This ambiguous pervert is very proud to be a boner. It is safe to say that Sam is the worlds biggest ska fan. From the Aquabats to...any ska band that starts with Z, Sam loves it all. His favorite bands include The Slackers and the Rx Bandits. Sam doesn't discriminate against the different waves of ska either. He happily dives into each wave regardless of the contracting feeling of his acid-washed cut-off denim swim trunks. Some call Sam a genious...but, once you get to know Sam he really isn't all that smart. I mean, we're talking about a guy who attempted to eat an entire Reeses Peanutbutter Pie from Denny's. Well...at least it was for a good cause - gluttony. Sam shares his favorite pasttime with the likes of Augustus Gloop, Fat Albert and Chris Griffin - eating. Sam balances his gluttonous obsession with free food by playing basketball and skankin' around in his suite at Harvard. This is the same place where he plans to major in philosophy and astrophysics. Not a joke. Like, I'm not kidding about it. The way to Sam's heart is through his stomach, his mind and his ears. Or you could cut the crap and karate chop him in the chest and rip out his heart like a real man would. |
