WHOLE RELATIONSHIP ASTROLOGY

 

“To thine own self be true, and it must follow as the night the day—thou can’st not then be false, to any man.”
        --Shakespeare

 

      Just as astrology is a gateway to self understanding, it is an excellent source for understanding our relationships with anybody else. By investigating our chart and comparing it with the charts of those we love, we can understand what brings us together and find our own path to relationship fulfilment.

     While individual people have souls, relationships between people also have a special energy of their own—a “synergy.” When people relate, there is a spiritual “chemical” reaction between souls, and an all-new energy is produced. This reaction is mirrored by the synthesis of the astrological charts of the relating individuals.

     In my version of Whole Relationship astrology, the birth charts of each individual in the relationship are analyzed separately, for how these people relate with others in general, and also together, as a single “synastry” chart for a view on the interpersonal synthesis. In a synastry chart, one horoscope is placed on top of another and we examine the new aspects between horoscopes made by the planetary positions.

     By discovering the squares, oppositions, and quincunxes between horoscopes, we will unearthe those embryonic areas in the relationship which are seeded with potential for expansion and heightened understanding. We may find areas which are potentially in conflict and transform challenge to opportunity through the power of awareness. We will also examine the trines, sextiles, and conjunctions in order to celebrate the strengths already inherent in this relationship.

     One important thing to remember when studying compatibility in astrology is that astrology cannot tell you whether or not you are “meant to be be” with a certain person. No chart can possibly determine whether or not two people can or can not get along. For example—my best friend is my brother, and our traditional synastry chart is loaded with squares and the so-called “difficult” aspects—and the chart’s right! As you would expect, we are very different from each other. But we love each other and are great friends; our differences compliment one another. These “difficult” aspects speak of potential for exciting growth and development.

     The wonderful thing which relationship astrology proves is that two well-developed, authentic souls can be COMPLETELY OPPOSITE each other and love each other passionately and devotedly. People who are very similar can also get along beautifully—however, if people are undeveloped, they can be nearly identical and still have a high conflict, antagonistic relationship and may not be able to get along.

      My attitude is that if you love one another, for real, and are honest about what kind of a relationship you want to have, you can get along and make it work, no matter WHAT the astrological differences are. Maybe I’m just a hopeless romantic, but I think that real love is the ONE thing in this life which is 100% guaranteed. The idea is to know exactly what a truly loving relationship means to you, and what it means to your partner, and to work out a working commitment based on these perceptions. If it’s an honest and real commitment between two loving people, and if you’re willing to stick with each other through thick and thin, it’s gonna work.

     Real compatibility is not based on how many squares or trines are present in a synastry map, or even on how “easy” the relationship is. True compatibility depends directly upon the level of self-honesty of the individuals involved, and upon the love present between the individuals. It’s not about how similar you think or talk or do, it’s about how well you understand each other’s needs and about how willing you are to put up with intimacy with other authentic, real human beings. That’s why astrology can really help you out!

     My job is to tell you what difficulties might arise between you, what your strongest resources are, and what you can do to maximize harmony between souls. The wonder of relationship astrology is that it can reveal a working picture of what you and your loved one can do to honor each other and show your love for each other in harmonious ways. It can point out differences in emotional style and thought process, and show you areas which could lead to either conflict or growth.

     I will not be able to tell you how basically developed a person is by looking at his or her chart. Horoscopes do not reveal how “well” a person is actually doing with their life curriculum; only you can truly know how well you are doing, by examining who you are and deciding for yourself if that’s what you want to be. (Astrology CAN tell you what areas of your chart personality may need brush work and what areas are basically fulfilled.)

      To truly know someone is to love that person; everyone, at their core of being, is lovable. But no one on this Earth (that I know, anyway) has perfected the art of showing their own authentic selves all of the time; there is always room for growth and development. That’s where astrology can help out. By studying our own chart, we can learn the art of self-intimacy, which is—of course—a prerequisite for true intimacy with anybody else.

      Once we are intimate with ourselves we can better broadcast who we truly are and attract other people on the authentic frequency wave-length. We are also prepared to understand the people we love, and their relationships to us. We can attune to the highest frequency of particular relationships by understanding the authentic souls of our loved ones, and by tapping into the authentic synergy which permeates our relationships.

     Relationship astrology serves as the blueprint for revealing the whole which is locked within every relationship. It is a map for mutual unfoldment.

      This is what relationship astrology is really all about.

 

 

Some really good books which deal with relationships:

Journey of the Heart by John Welwood, Ph.D.

Care of the Soul and Soul Mates by Thomas Moore