House of 1000 Corpses
[DVD Info]
On the night of October 30, 1977 we meet four youths Jerry Goldsmith (Chris Hardwick), Denise Willis (Erin Daniels), Mary Knowles (Jennifer Jostyn), and Bill Hudley (Rainn Wilson) who are driving cross country stopping at funky roadside attractions and taking notes on them so they can write a book. Running low on gas, they stop by a place called “Captain Spalding’s Museum” which has all kinds of horror movie type things in it. Since they’re there they decide to go on the “Murder Ride” and learn about different types of serial killers. One of the killers they learn about is Dr. Satan. A man who used to work at a mental hospital and he’d do experiments on the patients while trying to form some sort of super human (how that would work is beyond me…). One day he’s caught and they hang him from a tree (conveniently not too far from where the gas station) but the next day his body is gone. Jerry decides it would be cool to go look at the tree he was hung on and look for the body. So off they go. On the way the see a girl hitchhiking and they pick her up. Jerry asks if she knows where the tree is and she says yes and she’ll take them. While they’re driving (and it’s pouring rain) a man in a bear suit shoots out one of their tires. Baby (the hitchhiker) brings Bill to her house and then sends her brother out to get the others. It’ll take a couple of hours to fix the car so why not join her and her (weird) family for dinner. When Mary insults Baby by calling her a slut for hitting on her boyfriend Bill, all hell breaks loose and they’re all help captive and tortured. Will they escape? Can they even survive?
People named "Tiny" are never as such.
Sheriff's tow trucks are pink.
"It's true....the boogeyman is real, and you've found him." ~Earl.
Phew...that girl who played Baby was OB-NOX-IOUS. Sweet lord.
Wow…well…this movie was totally brutal…and depressing. But y’know…that’s probably how things honestly turn out in those situations. There’s no real hero or anything like that. You really don’t get attached to anyone in the movie because you know them for about 5 minutes before the sheep hits the fan. I liked Tiny because he was funny in his own way (sure he didn’t talk or anything but he’s just amusing). Hrmm…I dunno what to think about this movie. It reminded me a lot of the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre because of the grainy camera and such and how a family of inbreds kill people as a family activity. Anyway, although this movie was a little EXTREME Mary kinda deserved what she got…you just don’t call crazy inbreds sluts. You just don’t. Ah well. Wasn’t a terrible movie but I wasn’t a fan. Because of this, the jury gives this flick:
(Unsure)
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