A kindergarten pupil told his teacher he had found a cat.

She asked him if it was dead or alive. “Dead” she was informed.

“How do you know?” she asked her pupil.

“Because I pissed in it’s ear and it didn’t move.” answered the child innocently.

“You did WHAT?!?” the teacher exclaimed in surprise.

“You know,” explained the boy, “I leaned over and went ‘Pssst!’ and it didn’t move.”