Bad News' Bad Lyrics!

Heh Heh Bad News
Masturbike
Drink Til I Die
Warriors of Genghis Khan
Bad News
Cashing In On Christmas
Pretty Woman
Bohemian Rhapsody
Heh Heh Bad News

(Written, composed and arranged by V. Fuego)

Are you ready to rock?
Are you ready to roll?
Because we are Bad News
You gotta kick away the blues
So you me hear you say heh!

(Audience Chant)
Heh Heh Bad News
Heh Heh Bad News
Heh Heh Bad News
Heh Heh Bad News

Heh you're looking good
We're all having fun
You gotta kick away the blues
So sing heh heh Bad News!

(Audience Chant again)

Lead Break

(Audience Chant again)

Heh! That's what I say
This is metal!
And we ain't never gonna die, never gonna die, never gonna die!
We're so heavy!
Heavy Metal!
And we ain't never gonna die, never gonna die, never gonna die!

Are you ready to rock?
Are you ready to roll?
Bad News are here!
They're gonna save out souls! (Arseholes more like)



Masturbike
Fires of hell, doomsday bell,
Prison cell, bloody hell!

On my Masturbike!

See the cat, on the mat, it has shat, stupid twat
Look out we're going to hell!
Eat my brain, go insane, eat my brain, go insane
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!

Ride the rat, nightmare man
Ride the rat, nightmare man
On my Masturbike

Lick my hump, Kiss my stump
Burst my lump, Bloody pump
Look out we're going to hell!
Eat my brain, eat my brain, eat my brain, eat my brain
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!
Hello Bill! Chernobyl!
I feel Ill! Hospitil!
On my Masturbike!



Drink til I die!
Give me another drink Mr. Bartender
If you don't I'm gonna stick yer dick in a blender
Coz I, oh I, I'm gonna drink til I die
I'm gonna drink til I die

All I want to do is drink as much as I can
That's why I'm a member of a heavy metal band
Coz I, oh I, I'm gonna drink til I die

Lager makes me happy, vodka makes me mean
I'm a heavy metal drinking driving alcohol machine
Listen to me drinking, drinky, drinky, drink.
Listen to me when I go Bleuuuuuuugh!

I get up in the morning, drink a bottle of gin
40 pints of lager and a babycham
Coz I, oh I, I'm gonna drink til I die
I'm gonna drink til I die



Genghis Khan image Warriors of Genghis KhanGenghis Khan Image - he looks meaner in this one

I'm a warrior, the bloody won't wash away
I'm a warrior, I'll kill myself one day!

Burning looting, raping shooting
Burning looting, raping shooting
Burning looting, raping shooting
Burning looting, raping shooting

All this I do, I'd kill for you

Come on pretty baby won't you take my hand
Come and fuck the ? in a rock and roll band
Baby baby baby baby baby
I want to see your bloody all over the land. All this I do, I'd kill for you

Coz I'm a warrior, of Genghis Khan
Coz I'm a warrior, of Genghis Khan
I'm a warrior, the bloody won't wash away
I'm a warrior, I'll kill myself one day

Coz I'm a warrior, of Genghis Khan
Coz I'm a warrior, of Genghis Khan
I'm a warrior, the bloody won't wash away
I'm a warrior, I'll kill myself one day



Bad News

Bad News Bad News Bad News
For you and you and you and you and you
Bad News Bad News Bad News
For you and you and you and you and you

Can't you see Black Leather?
Can't you hear Devil Woman?
Can't you see Screaming Virgins?
Don't you know bloodlust paranoid metal!

Bad News Bad News Bad News
For you and you and you and you and you
Bad News Bad News Bad News
For you and you and you and you and you

Can't you see heavy rainbow?
Can't you hear metal fury?
Can't you see demon lager?
Don't you know Megawatt Winged Avenger!


Pretty Woman [Bad News]

Pretty Woman

(Words and Music by Orbison/Dees)


Come along then, let's play....
Why do we have to be playing Pretty Woman
We don't even know the lyrics to Pretty Woman

Yeah, you just go Pretty Woman a lot, don't you?

Pretty woman, walking down the street
Pretty woman, kind of girl I'd meet
Pretty woman, la la la pretty woman

Pretty woman, walking down the street
Pretty woman, walking down the street
Pretty woman, walking down the street
Pretty woman, walking down the street
Oh pretty woman, walking down the street
Oh pretty woman, walking down the street
Probably getting quite tired now, done such a lot of walking
Fucking woman keeps on walking down the fucking street

Oh look, do we have to have the swear words

Woman, pretty woman, walking down the fucking street (keep it clean)
Woman, woman, walking down the beep street
Why's she walking down the street

Pretty woman

Bass break (keep playing)

Pretty woman
Pretty woman
Pretty woman
Ugly woman, walking down the street
Ugly woman, probably Colin Grigson's girlfriend

But she's probably not Colin Grigson's girlfriend because if she was she'd be much more attractive than that

Oh, I'm bored with that



Cashing In On Christmas [Bad News]

Cashing In On Christmas

Words and Music by Vim Fuego, Colin Grigson, Den Dennis and Spider Webb


Cashing on on Christmas
Hear those cash tills ring
Jingle bells make money
Everybody sing

Queuing up at Woolworths to get our christmas hits
We're after peace and love and joy and jingle bells on it
This is our Christmas single, please make it number one
And give us all your money, to make our christmas fun

Cashing on on Christmas
Hear those cash tills ring
Jingle bells make money
Everybody sing

Cos we are rocking
Every christmas we're rocking
Say Santa Claus and we are rocking
Oh jingle bells and we're rocking
Well every Christmas we are rocking
We're rocking all the way to the bank

Cashing on on Christmas
Hear those cash tills ring
Jingle bells make money
Everybody sing

I want to wake up on Christmas morning with the snow all over the ground
There's Bad News's Christmas single in my stocking
It only cost just over a pound

Hello, this is Den Dennis. I hope you're all having a very merry Christmas. This is our Christmas single, please buy it and make it number one. All our Christmas fun

Hello everybody, it's Vim Fuego here. Sorry I can't be with you this Christmas but I'm in the Carribean with all your money, having a good drink and a laugh. Have a lot of fun, merry Christmas

Cashing in on Christmas
Christmas girls and boys
Cashing in on Christmas
Let's make lots of noise

Cos we are rocking
Every christmas we're rocking
Say Santa Claus and we are rocking
Oh jingle bells and we're rocking
Well every Christmas we are rocking
We're rocking all the way to the bank

Cashing in on Christmas
Christmas girls and boys
Cashing in on Christmas
Let's make lots of noise

Hello everyone, this is Colin Grigson. Please give as generously as you can to Bad News this Christmas because, remember, there are people in the world who are much better at spending your money that you are, and that's us. Ha ha ha, merry Christmas.

Cashing in on Christmas
Christmas girls and boys
Cashing in on Christmas
Let's make lots of noise

Hello, I'm Spider Webb.

No credit cards thank you, and no cheques, just cash, thankyou. More and more cash.


Bohemian Rhapsody

(Vim coughs)

Vim:	MAMAAAAAA! I just killed a man.
	I put a gun up to his head, I pulled the trigger, now he's dead!
	MAMAAAA! Life had just begun
	But now I've gone and thrown it all away!!!
	MAMAAA! OOOH OOOH OOOH!
	I don't wanna die! I sometimes wish I'd never been born at all!

(Guitar solo with copious wrong notes.)

Vim:	I see a little silhouetto of a man
All:	Scaramouche, scaramouche, will you do the fandango?
	Thunderbolt and lightning, very very frightening me!
	Gallileo! Gallileo!
	Gallileo! Gallileo!
Colin:	Figaro!
All:	Gallileo! Figaro! Magnifico-o-o-o-o-o-o!
Vim:	Easy come, easy go, will you let me go?
Spider:	(falsetto) Let me go!
All:	Bismillah! No, we will not let you go!
	Let me go!
	Bismillah! We will not let you go!
	Let me go!
	Bismillah! We will not let you go!
	Let me go! Will not let you go!
	Let me go! Will not let you go!
	Oh let me go-o-o!!
	No, no, no, no, no, no, NO!
Colin:	Absolutely NOT!
All:	Oh mamma mia, mamma mia, mamma mia, Figaro
Spider:	(falsetto) Mamma mia!
Vim:	Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me...
All:	For me, for MEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

Vim:	NO!

Vim:	So you think you can stop me and spit in my eye?
	So you think you can love me and leave me to die?
	Ooooh, baby! Can't do this to me baby!
	I just gotta get out! I just gotta get right out of here.

(Another poor guitar solo.)

Vim:	Nothing really matters, anyone can see,
Colin:	Nothing really matters!
All:	Nothing ever happens to me!!!

(Song ends.)

Spider:	Brilliant!
Vim:	Right.
Colin:	I thought that was good.
Vim:	I thought that was pretty good.
Colin:	I thought it was VERY good.
Vim:	Blow Queen off the fucking stage.
Colin:	Yes, absolutely!

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