Ways to Reduce Tension in Your Life

While everyone experiences times of stress, the truth is that stress does not have to be so stressful. Here are some ways to help you cope:

Diversify your life.

The most stressed people are those whose interests are narrow and limited. Consider diversifying your life so that you have several interests and commitments. Here is wisdom from Dr. Bruce Munro, Doctor of Behavioral Medicine at the Institute of Stress Medicine, Jackson Hole, Wyoming. "It is important not to focus only on one or two areas of interest. All of us need a variety of diversions, so that if one interest area becomes stressful or goes sour, there will be others that are doing well and can take up the slack."

Let a friend in on your life.

Cultivate a high capacity for intimacy. Psychologist know that people who have a number of close friends and confidants cope better with stress than those who do not have such friends. By confiding in a trusted friend, a crisis becomes a source ofchallenge rather than an overwhelming exhausting event. Jenny Steinmetz, a psychologist at the Kaiser Permanente Medical Center in Hayward, California, explains: "Having one or two close friends that you feel free to say anything to is invaluable. Often when you are overwhelmed, you don't trust your own judgment enough to realize that you're okay. But an objective view from a friend helps validate your opinion."

Learn to weather disappointment.

Life will not always deliver us everything we wish and hope for. There will be times when a colleague forgets a lunch date with you, a long-promised promotion does not happen, or a friend fails to come through for you. Whether it is a minor letdown or a major disappointment, learn to weather life's blows. To do that successfully, remind yourself to avoid self-blame. Don't fault yourself or what life brings your way. Many times events and circumstances are out of your control. Also, life's disappointments are easier to weather when we avoid "catastrophizing." Try reminding yourself that one sad event does not mean you will never be happy again.