1. There'd be slumber parties at the White House, and all the leaders of the free world would eat ice cream and braid each other's hair.
2. Half-price clothing and shoe sales across the country once a month--on president's orders.
3. Tampons would be free.
4. Rather than attack rogue nations like Iraq, the president would give them a "time-out."
5. Eating a minimum daily amount of chocolate would be a law.
6. Women would make equal pay, man!
7. When a guy says "I'll call you" and doesn't, he would be punished by jail time and additional fines.
8. There would be more bathrooms everywhere.
9. You'd get the week you're PMSing off from school.
10. The State of the Union address would only be shown on Lifetime --Television for women.
11. The president's husband, the first gentleman, would graciously escort the press around the White House to show off the efforts of his East Wing remodeling efforts: neon beer signs, a big-screen TV, a lazy boy chair and posters of dogs playing poker.
12. Executive order: Yoga replaces baseball as the national pastime.
13. The evening news would be reported by young hunks without shirts (buh-bye, Dan Rather).
14. Schools and kids would be prioritized over bomb-building and campaign financing.
15. The White House would be pink and covered with pretty sparkly stuff.
16. New term in the American lexicon: "Pre-menstrual veto."
Check out these site's with the future Prez's approval: toostupidtobepresident.com, and nogop.com. |
