| Quotes from the TV Show F.R.I.E.N.D.S |
| Chandler: Okay, well Janice said, "Hi, do I look fat today?" And I looked at her... Ross: Whoa, whoa, whoa! You looked at her? You never look! You just answer; it's just a reflex. Do I look fat? Nooo! Is she prettier than I am? Noo! Does size matter? Rachel: Nooo! Ross: And it works both ways. |
| Chandler: Hey, Joe, I gotta ask. The girl from the Xerox place buck naked (holds up one hand) or, or a big tub of jam (holds up the other hand). Joey: Put your hands together (smiles). |
| Chandler: I think for us kissing is pretty much like an opening act, yanno? I mean, it's like the stand-up comedian you have to sit through before Pink Floyd comes out. Ross: Yeah, and it's not that we don't like the comedian, it's that that's not why we bought the ticket. Chandler: The problem is, though, after the concert's over, no matter how great the show was, you girls are always looking for the comedian again, yanno? I mean, we're in the car, we're fighting traffic.. basically just trying to stay awake. Rachel: Yeah well, word of advice: Bring back the comedian. Otherwise next time you're gonna find yourself sitting at home, listening to that album alone. |
| Joey: It's never gonna happen. Ross: What? Joey: You and Rachel. Ross: What? Why not? Joey: Because you waited to long to make your move, and now you're in the friend zone. Ross: No, no, no. I'm not in the zone. Joey: Ross, you're mayor of the zone. |
| Ross: Do you know the word crapweasel? Paolo: No. Ross: That's funny, because you know, you are a huge crapweasel! |
| Ross: Wow, you guys sure have a lot of books about bein' a lesbian. Susan: Well you know, you have to take a course. Otherwise they don't let you do it. |
| Phoebe: You know, I think I want to write a song about all this. Rachel: Oh yeah? Phoebe: Yeah. Oh, except one of the strings on my guitar is broken. Hey Chandler, can I borrow your G-string? Chandler: How long you been waitin' to say that? Phoebe: About 20 minutes. |
| Chandler: You're little men are gonna get scored on more times than your sister. Joey: Woah, woah, woah! Which sister? |
| Chandler: Does anyone else think David Copperfield is cute? Monica: No, but he told me he thinks you're a fox. |
| Phoebe: No, Mr Heckles. No one is making any noise up here. Mr. Heckles: You're disturbing my oboe practice. Phoebe: You don't play the oboe. Mr. Heckles: I could play the oboe. Phoebe: Then I'm gonna have to ask you to keep it down. |
| Rachel: I brought reinforcements. Ross: You brought Joey? Rachel: Well, I brought the next best thing. Chandler: (entering) Hey! Ross: Chandler?! You brought Chandler? The next best thing would be Monica! Chandler: Yanno, I would be offended, but Monica is freakishly strong so... |
| Monica: And dad, you know that mailman you got fired? He didn't steal your Playboys, Ross did! Ross: Yeah well Hurricane Gloria didn't break the porch swing, Monica did! Monica: Ross hasn't worked at the museum for a year! Ross: Monica and Chandler are living together! Monica: Ross married Rachel in Vegas! And got divorced! Again!!!! |