Author’s
Notes: I realize that the prologue was rather bland. I was pushing for it to read like a history
book, but I don’t know if I succeeded. I
realize that the dates are a little hokey (for example, an economic depression
in
shat·ter (shăt’Ər)
Hyde was always a man of routine. Even with the onset of the “new order” he
kept things on a rigid schedule. He had
to. Else everything would fall out of
the perfect balance that it revolved in.
Get up. Take a shower. Wake Reiko up. Eat.
Kiss Megumi goodbye. Go to
work. Come home. Kiss Megumi hello. Help Reiko with any homework left over. Eat dinner.
Send Reiko to bed. Go to bed.
Such
was the routine.
He
was almost complete with today’s schedule, he reflected, as he put the key in
the lock. Swinging the door open, he
took off his shoes and stepped inside.
“I’m home…Megumi?” No
answer. That was odd. “Reiko?”
No answer. That was really
odd. Even if Megumi had gone out, Reiko
would have come home after school. She
was a good girl. She would have come
home and done her homework and would have waited for Daddy to come home
too.
The
hair on the back of his neck stood on end as he strode further into the
house. He turned into the living room
and –
Shattered glass.
Shattered picture frames.
Everything was smashed, shredded, torn to pieces. “Megumi?!” he cried, looking desperately
around the room for any sign of life. Good God, what happened here? He turned and bolted up the stairs, calling
out their names on the way. He turned
into the first room, Reiko’s room.
Broken toys, tattered drawings. No Reiko.
No Megumi. He ran into the next
room, and the next. Searching,
searching. Where?
A
muffled groan reached his ears. He
turned and stared down the hall.
No...
Running
into the so-called “Music Room,” he found Megumi. She lay sprawled on the floor, her hair
matted to her face in bloodied patches.
Her eyes moved to look on him. “Hidet...” Her voice
cracked, and faded off as she coughed.
Flecks of blood painted her lips.
No, God...no...
He
took her in his arms, brushing the dark strands out of her face. “Mei…what
happened?” Her eyes lulled. “Mei!”
She
blinked. She was so weak. “Hidetou…they
came. I tried to get away. I told Reiko to run...I told her to run
away. They chased her...Find her...” She started coughing again.
Laying
her gently on the floor, he stood and bolted down the hallway, looking for his
daughter. “Reiko! Reiko!”
He had checked all the rooms. He
knew he had. All of the
rooms...but...Hyde made turned into his and Megumi’s bedroom and almost
screamed. Almost. His throat had constricted too much to
breath, much less scream. There she was.
Reiko
lay sprawled on the ground, tangled in the sheet off of her parents’ bed, teddy
bear firmly grasped in her small hands.
Her
throat had been cut.
Hyde
rushed forward and took the child in his arms.
“No…no…” As tears streamed from his eyes, he rocked the motionless
bundle, hushing the lifeless little girl and murmuring words of comfort to deaf
ears. “Daddy’s here…it’ll be all better
now…hush. Don’t
cry. Don’t cry.”
He
stood and lay Reiko on the bed, brushing her bangs away from her closed
eyes. Turning, he headed back down the
hallway to Megumi. Hyde collapsed at her
side and took her into his arms.
“Reiko’s dead, Megumi. She’s dead.”
There
was a muffled cry, a cry of a distraught mother, a cry of a dying woman…and
then there was nothing. Looking down,
Hyde found himself alone.
*****
“Has
the Jury reached a verdict?”
Hyde
didn’t need to hear the ruling, he already knew: they had found him
guilty. He was going to prison for a
crime he didn’t commit. His lawyer had
been bought out by the prosecution, he was sure. The
jury probably has been too, he thought, glancing sidelong at the people
sitting behind the tribunal.
All
things considered, he couldn’t blame them for the charge - it was a shoddy
defense. They only had his word to go
on. Any jury would rule against him. His criminal law and justice class in high
school had been enough to teach him that. Found at the scene of the crime, weapon used
for the murders found in the house, hidden in a likely spot, hadn’t called the
police as soon as he found Megumi and Reiko, fingerprints everywhere…
“Will
the Defendant please rise.”
It
changed nothing. Megumi was dead. Reiko was dead. And he was guilty.
And
then it dawned on him: he was
guilty. He hadn’t played by their
rules. Megumi was dead. Reiko was dead. All because of him. He hadn’t sold out.
So
he had unwittingly sold their lives.
“How far?” Hyde muttered. Apparently he had underestimated how far a
solitary voice carried in a silent courtroom – After all, the acoustics are fabulous – as he felt the eyes of the
attorneys, the Jury, the judge, and the spectators turn to stare.
“Excuse
me?” questioned the judge, removing his reading glasses.
“How
far do they have to go?” he looked up.
“How many innocent bystanders do they have to slaughter? How many little girls do they have to
kill? How many of you,” he gestured
wildly to the members of the court, “have been bought, have sold out?”
He
felt his attorney touch his arm, most likely to silence him. Hyde wrenched himself from the other man’s
grip, knocking over chairs in his haste to escape the man’s grasp. “Don’t touch
me! Filth! How much was it for you? At least three times, I’m sure. Bastard!
And you!” He turned to face
the startled Jury. “How
much for you? Whores!
Monsters! My wife and daughter
are dead and the man who did it walks
among you. How much longer before you
piss someone off? How much longer before
that someone makes connections? How much
longer before they kill yours? Fools!”
He
knew he had lost it. He stared wildly
around him.
From
the galley, Gackt watched catastrophe unfold.
Hyde was known amongst friends to have a temper, but nothing like this. This was madness. He would know, after all. He had seen it in the mirror more than
once. Hyde turned to stair at the door
which led outside to the free world and Gackt watched the other man’s eyes go
wide. Hyde’s legs folded underneath him
as he collapsed to the floor screaming.
The
spectators jumped to their feet, frightened by the turn of events. Gackt rose and shifted to move to his fallen
companion’s side, but was stopped by an iron grip around his wrist. Looking to his right, he stared into Ren’s warning gaze.
The other man’s eyes spoke to him.
Don’t. Move.
Gackt
blinked, acknowledging the unspoken command.
He glanced back at Hyde who was being dragged kicking and screaming out
of the courtroom. Turning on his heal,
Gackt stared at the door. He squinted
and tilted his head, feeling the air beside his ear shift as Ren leaned
forward.
“What
are you doing?” the shorter man whispered.
His voice betrayed how unsettled he was in reaction to the recent
goings-on.
“Trying
to see what he sees…” Gackt threw over his shoulder.
After
several minutes, the courtroom filtered out the door into the rain and cold
air. Gackt and Ren huddled underneath the
expansive shield of the black nylon umbrella.
They walked in silence to the parking garage and slid into the car. It was only then that Ren spoke. “So?”
“What
do you mean, ‘so’?” Gackt winced, knowing the shudder
in his voice betrayed how unsettled he was in reality.
“You
saw something. What was it?”
“I
didn’t see anything.”
“Liar.
Tell me.”
“Honestly,
Ren. I didn’t see anything…That’s what
scares me.”
“What
are you talking about…?” Now it was Ren’s turn to sound unnerved.
At
a stoplight, Gackt turned to face his friend.
“There was nothing there.” He
watched as the other man’s eyes widened in realization and then turn quickly
away to stare straight in front of them.
When the light turned green, Gackt shifted his foot from the break to
the gas pedal. The rest of the ride was
spent in silence.
*****
Gackt
sat on the couch staring at the muted television. Kai [1] had long since gone to bed, Ren
wasn’t home – he had probably gone out with Cha and his boyfriend [2] – and You was in the shower, so for at least another five minutes,
he was alone with his thoughts.
The
court had assembled again today as the Jury had requested to reconsider its
ruling of the day before. Gackt hadn’t
gone this time. He didn’t need to be
there to know what the ruling would be.
His suspicions were confirmed on the news tonight anyway.
Hyde
had been found guilty of accounts of a double murder during a bout of temporary
insanity. In all honesty, Gackt would
never have believed it had yesterday never happened.
But yesterday had
happened. And, as ashamed as
he was to admit it, Gackt believed it now.
In the courtroom the day before, he had tried with all his might to see
what Hyde saw, to have peace of mind if nothing else. But there was nothing – no vapors, no
shapeless blurs, no bending light, no ethereal shapes, nothing. Hyde was traumatized, that was for sure, and
most likely in shock and disturbed, perhaps, but mad? Gackt didn’t want to
think about it.
Looking
over his shoulder, he found You rubbing his hair dry
with a towel.
“I
have to see him.”
You
merely nodded.
*****
A
few days later, Gackt found himself in an all-to-familiar asylum. It hadn’t changed much. A new staff – thankfully – and a new paint
job, but that was about it. He checked
in with the guard, who gave him an intercom in case he “needed anything” and
pointed him in the direction of Hyde’s cell.
The Red Ward.
He had never been down these hallways before, the hair on the back of
his neck standing on end. This ward was
for the criminally insane and those who were a danger to themselves and others.
[3] Gackt
shivered.
Reaching
the specified door, he flashed his ID to the guard who waved him inside. What met him on the other side nearly sent
him into tears.
Hyde
sat cross-legged on the ratty cot in the corner of the room, moving hands
quickly in folding motion, staring intently at empty air between hands. Gackt looked at the intercom, then back to
Hyde and decided to leave the intercom by the door. He’d pick it up before he left. As he knelt down to the floor, he saw Hyde’s
eyes follow him. Standing up again,
Gackt asked, “Haido?”
The other man went back to his hands.
Gackt crossed the room and knelt before the shorter man. “What are you doing?”
“Origami.”
The
simple answer was enough to crush any and all of his hopes in one fell
swoop. Gackt felt his face screw up in a
grimace. “Oh, Haido…”
“Don’t
cry.”
Startled,
the other raised his eyes. “...what?”
Hyde
let his hands drop to his lap and stared straight ahead, avoiding his friend’s
dark eyes. “Tears aren't worth it. Not
when there's any mourning to be done. I should be crying - I've lost my wife,
my daughter, my life, my apparent sanity...all within about a week or so.”
Gackt
paused at this monologue. Hyde didn’t
speak like a madman. “Apparent?”
The
other man finally dropped his eyes to meet Gackt’s
and echoed his thoughts. “You were mad
once. What was it like?” Taken aback, the man’s lips moved without sound,
searching for the right answer but failing miserably. Hyde sighed, sounding unimpressed. “It doesn’t matter much anyway. The guards seem to believe me, so they leave
me alone for the most part. That's why they gave you just the intercom. If they really thought I still had a head on
my shoulders, they would have given you a guard in the room and a gun.”
They
talked idolly for some time, daring the other to
speak the unspeakable first. Hyde
stared, stone-faced at Gackt, who finally gave in and asked in hushed tones,
“Did you do it?”
“WHAT?!”
Hyde’s resolve cracked instantaneously and he jumped to his feet, which
in turn knocked Gackt to his back on the floor below his unbalanced
friend.
Scrambling
to stand, Gackt pleaded. “Haido, please. I need to know.”
“You
think I could even raise a finger
against Megumi? Or my
own daughter? Oh, God Gackt,
tell me they brainwashed too…”
Collapsing back to the cot, Hyde hid his face in his hands. “If that's the case, I think I really will go
mad…”
Gackt
leaned forward and wrapped the other in his arms, burying his one face in the
other man’s shoulder. “I knew it. I knew there was no way you could have done
it. Haido, the world has gone mad.”
They
remained like that for what seemed like hours. Hyde slowly withdrew from the other man and
placed his small hands on Gackt’s shoulders. “Listen…”
He wouldn’t meet the dark eyes before him. “Listen…you have to get out of here.”
“…Why?”
Hyde
snorted derisively. “As if I’m not
enough proof…” he muttered, but continued before Gackt could protest. “You have to get out of here. Take Kai and leave. Take all of them and leave. It’ll only get worse. This is just the beginning.”
[1]
Kai = Gackt’s daughter. Let me explain her history. Gackt runs into
(literally) Woman at coffee shop. They
fall in love (he doesn’t tell her who he is, she doesn’t make the
connection). They woo, romp in bed, etc,
etc, etc. Gackt tells Woman who he is.
Woman suddenly makes the connection, feels like an idiot, tries
to push him away. He’s infatuated with
her. She realizes she still loves
him. They get hitched. Up to a year later, they’re still in secret
and come out to the Dears first at a Dears-Only-Party-Tour thingie
and then later in an interview. In 2004
their daughter, Kai is born. Seven years
later, Woman dies (don’t know why).
Currently, the little girl is about ten, same age as Hyde’s daughter. Expansive history, I know. …Sorry.
o.o;
[2]
Yes, Cha is gay in this story. =^.^=
[3]
Yeah, I definitely don’t know anything about psych wards or insane
asylums. I’ve never been in one. I count that as a blessing.