| * * Secret Talk... * * |
| ...Boy friend, boy friend, boy friend, everybody asking me, "where is your boyfriend?" What kind of answer you are expecting from me? How do you want me to answer it? I don't know!!! I am wondering where is he also... Those who are cuter than me got a boy friend, those who are not as cute as I am also got a boy friend....but where is mine? I'm wondering about that too....I really don't know how should I answer your question.... People say I'm cute always, but I doubt about it... I don't think I'm cute, but how come you guys do? I can't see the upper part of my locker because I'm not tall enough, that's why I have to jump, and there she is, a girl who running all the way from the other side of the hallway and hug me, she said, "oh my god, you are so cute~~~" What? Cute? So that's the definition of CUTE!! "Oh, you are so cute, you should have a boyfriend, why don't you go get one?" that's what people always say to me, but I really want to ask...what's the relationship between cute and a boy friend? Because I'm cute, so I should get a boy friend? Don't you think this assumption just a little bit too strange? I'm just a bit short, it doesn't mean I'm weak; I can't see the sight where you are looking at, it doesn't mean I am blind; I don't talk, it doesn't mean I don't care...people judge the others with their own rules, what about mine? When my dearest younger sister and I holding whole bunch of bags and stuffs on our way home, "are you okay with those bags?", she tends to ask me that every 10 min, just because I'm shorter than her...hold on for a second, isn't it I should be the one who take care of her? Thanks for those who are worry about me, but can you guys trust me at the same time? If once in a while, I would be glad that there is someone who is really cares about me, but please don't treat me like I'm 8... ...oh my...I think...I am getting a bit crazy these few days..lots of stuff just happened on me...what's wrong with me..? I can't really tell what's the feeling inside...maybe I am a bad girl...or because of getting know more about the world..? I think I am really growing up...outside of my mum and dad's roof..I start to understand more about this little world...more about the people..more about life...and more about the relationship between people... But at the same time...those things are messing my own little world up...and I don't really like it...Is that all the payback of growing up..? All the things are totally different as what I thought before...and mostly...they are shocking me...why...? Learning from a book, is totally different feeling as really heard it form your friends...It really hard for me to tell I hate it or not, but they all seem different as what I thought before...am I judge the others also...or maybe I don't know them really well..? I know these are not really my concern, but...really shocking... And I really have to say it...eventhough...I still love u guys...as usual... .....25-4-2004..... I am having my new life... and i am glad that... I found it finally... it's all coming to me, I'm gonna love this...I am pretty sure... .....5-9-2004..... |
| Last update: 5-9-2004 |