OK well where to go first. It had to be something spectacular, something magnificent. Unfortunately we couldn’t find a room matching that description. So instead we visited Married Bored Women. Here is an excerpt from that room:
DaDrunkenDwarf : I came in hopes of talking with a married bored woman
FeelRealGood : now what
Vocephus : Hence the room name...
8RiCko4U has left the conversation.
8FeelRealGood has left the conversation.
Vocephus : I have a suggestion for all you MARRIED BORED WOMEN...go vacuum! Make a pie! Make some babies! HA!
8JimEagle10 has joined the conversation.
DaDrunkenDwarf : Now that is mean Vocephus
Vocephus : It's not mean...I'm trying to help.
DaDrunkenDwarf : You know they can only do two of the three at once
8Guest_Rose_441 has left the conversation.
8Guest_SassiPatti has left the conversation.
8Guest_iceman739 has left the conversation.
Vocephus : I never said to do them all at the same time...but making pies while making babies sounds like something I could get into...
As you can see, not only did the room suck, but we managed to annoy 5 people out of the room! I feel that deserves personal pats on the back. Now we were obviously bored, I mean, what else are chat rooms for. So our next stop would be to the Teen Poets room. Here is the next exciting chat:
Vocephus : Wow.
Vocephus : Packed house tonight, huh?
DaDrunkenDwarf : Hi room!!!!
huxleyvena : suffocating.
Vocephus : Watch out, it's a lively bunch.
huxleyvena : aye, that.
huxleyvena : too much of us is delirious.
cowboy_regular : the nice girls are gonna break every rule in the Book
DaDrunkenDwarf : I have been dying to hear some of my favorite poets
huxleyvena : better leave.
huxleyvena : the poets would probably appreciate you dying.
huxleyvena : they're sick like that.
cowboy_regular : the nice girls are gonna break every rule in the Book
huxleyvena : and they love it.
huxleyvena : cowboy. yes. ehm.
Vocephus : Is that poetry, or are you having trouble gathering your thoughts tongiht?
huxleyvena : it is the simultaneous combustion, ceph.
Vocephus : Right-o.
huxleyvena : but otherwise, "no".
huxleyvena : drunken dwarves are hideous.
DaDrunkenDwarf : I am not!
(As you can guess, I was upset. You don’t make fun of dwarves. Dwarves are people too….very short people…but people nonetheless)
Vocephus : Okay, I've been working on a poem, but I can't think of anything that rhymes with "Nantucket"..
huxleyvena : mobile gnomes are worse.
DaDrunkenDwarf : bucket
Vocephus : Ah! Perfect!
huxleyvena : suck it?
DaDrunkenDwarf : I have a friend who is a gnome! He gets around
huxleyvena : your friend deserves to die.
huxleyvena : i am sorry, but that's for true.
Vocephus : It's not easy being a gnome...not that I'd know.
huxleyvena : *firm nod*
DaDrunkenDwarf : Why do you harbor a hatred for my kind?
Vocephus : Hux, you seem like a right cheery fella, ain't ya?
huxleyvena : no.
Vocephus : Well, bust my zipper!
huxleyvena : that's madame to you.
huxleyvena : *thwap*
Vocephus : Ah...how could I not have know.
huxleyvena : i won't answer that.
DaDrunkenDwarf : wait wait wait
huxleyvena : and if not?
DaDrunkenDwarf : I am still stuck on the down with short people idea
huxleyvena : stuck on the down?
huxleyvena : *blink?*
DaDrunkenDwarf : On the fact you hate us...or find us disgusting
huxleyvena : i do not hate you.
huxleyvena : i just find you disgusting...
Vocephus : I haven't even read you any of my deep, moving poetry yet.
cowboy_regular : the nice girls are gonna break every rule in the Book(Personal note: This guy will NOT stop saying that)
huxleyvena : deep moving poetry drowns you in yourself.
huxleyvena : i bet you're great. :-}
huxleyvena : drunkendwarf.
DaDrunkenDwarf : Have you met me? Have you tasted my saliva? Have you looked down to find my head under your dress? I think not
huxleyvena : take heed.
huxleyvena looks down.
huxleyvena extracts a butterknife.
DaDrunkenDwarf : ???
(I was pretty surprised. I mean she was virtually trying to attack me. It was a first. But I hope not the last.)
Vocephus : It goes like this...*ahem*..."In the forest, there was a tree. The tree, you see, represents me. The tree got cut, the tree fell down. No one picked it up off the ground. I've fallen, and I can't get up."
huxleyvena chases the mobile dwarf.
huxleyvena : ahaha, ceph.
DaDrunkenDwarf : I am drunken!!!
(Why she was insistent on the whole “mobile” thing is beyond me.)
huxleyvena : damn. i am. moved.
huxleyvena : deeply. aye.
Vocephus : I just had a movement myself...ugh..that brisket is NOT siting right.
DaDrunkenDwarf : I have a poem
Vocephus : Oh, joy!
DaDrunkenDwarf : I will not drink vodka in a cup, I will not drink it with a pup, I will not drink gas and beer, I will not drink it you rainbow deer(Personal Note: I am a fan of Dr.Suess…can you tell? Well actually I am not…anyways…)
Vocephus : Wow...I mean....wow....I'm wiping away tears over here.
DaDrunkenDwarf : It is some of my best work
8huxleyvena has left the conversation.
Vocephus : What a shame.
Vocephus : I guess we out-poeted the poets, eh?
DaDrunkenDwarf : I have more!
Vocephus : Alas, they fall upon deaf ears, friend.
DaDrunkenDwarf : ..........
Now wasn’t that pure, edge of your seat excitement! I need to create a book of poems. That might be a side project. Vocephus did promise me a whole page of my own. I am…so honored…I…I am speechless. Anyways, if you think this is the end then you are sadly mistaken. I have more chats to go! Next stop on the chat room express, Guys and Girls That Sleep With Family! Here you go:
FootballjockSHS : i need my fucken cock sucked ladies
DaDrunkenDwarf : who doesn't lol
8one_and_only_train has joined the conversation.
Vocephus : That's one way to put it...
8ÇÅÑÐÄ€Ê has left the conversation.
Vocephus : Didja ever try asking nicely?
8one_and_only_train has left the conversation.
8texas_mike1 has left the conversation.
8loverguy_2 has left the conversation.
(If you haven’t guessed, it seems that when we enter chat rooms, people leave. I can assure everyone, we are not leperous…well, maybe Vocephus)
FootballjockSHS : that was nice i said ladies didnt i
DaDrunkenDwarf : I guess...
Vocephus : Oh, yeah...I'm sure you're a real hit with the women.
Vocephus : Then again, what do I know?
stevn0 : my girl friend wants to know how big footballjock
Vocephus : Dwarf, you gettin' any yet?
DaDrunkenDwarf : anyways...Who is sleeping with family?
DaDrunkenDwarf : no....
8playaz_6363 has left the conversation.
FootballjockSHS : only 7and a half
Vocephus : I hope you're talking about width...
stevn0 : she doesnt believe ut
Vocephus : As well she shouldn't.
Vocephus : Let me tell you all something about the internet...
FootballjockSHS : that's actually true
Vocephus : It's a meeting place for Fat Chicks and Small Dicks.
FootballjockSHS : but im not very fat
FootballjockSHS : lol
DaDrunkenDwarf : .........
Vocephus : Yeah.
luv2tri : m 31 here....l like to suck cock
Vocephus : This is just a regular swingin' joint.
8The_King_of_Ice has joined the conversation.
Vocephus : Fook this.
Vocephus : Let's blow...and not in THAT way.
OK…I am truly sorry about that last chat room. I only included it because, hey, I was in the room and I am just the best. OK well enough about me. Let’s talk about the next room, the best room, and the final room(I hear you guys cheering! I am offended), Madam Tada – Psychic! Let us see what the world holds for our brave heroes in our final room of the night.
Vocephus : I thought she was talking a break, or do you posess some ability yourself?
Angyl1999 : can I really talk to a psycic?
JoyBoyWG : I might
JoyBoyWG : Try me
Vocephus : Alrighty then...what color shirt am I wearing right now?
DaDrunkenDwarf : I am waiting for my turn with Madam Tada
JoyBoyWG : Yes Angy, But she is taking a brake right now
Vocephus : Just as a test...
JoyBoyWG : Hello Dwarf
JoyBoyWG : Howdy buddy
DaDrunkenDwarf : Hi!!!!!
Angyl1999 : do you know when she will be back?
DaDrunkenDwarf : Finally a friend!
Madam_Tada : ok im back
Vocephus : Gee...thanks a pan load, dwarf..
(I felt bad…I had finally found a friend, maybe someone to spend those drunken nights with. But I overlooked my good buddy Vocephus. I guess I hurt his feelings. But if you read on further, you will see that there will be more people in his life other than me)
JoyBoyWG : yes ! I see her comming back ....... Just now
Madam_Tada : i had to refresh
Vocephus : Ha!
DaDrunkenDwarf : Yay!!!! I will stop drinking for this occasion
JoyBoyWG : See I was right
Vocephus : To bad it's real time text, JoyBoy..heh.
Angyl1999 : welcome back
8Shaymee1 has joined the conversation.
JoyBoyWG : Pooof and she was here
Angyl1999 : can i be next?
Shaymee1 : hiii i am back
JoyBoyWG : hey angy
Vocephus : I believe I got here before you, Angyl..
JoyBoyWG : you can
DaDrunkenDwarf : so did I...I think
Vocephus : But then agian...
Vocephus : Let's let the psycic decide.
Shaymee1 : ok
Angyl1999 : ok, can i go after whoever?
Vocephus : After all, she's doing all the work, right?
Angyl1999 : yep
Shaymee1 : where is she?
Madam_Tada : ok let me talk with one person at a time here
Angyl1999 : sounds kosher
Vocephus : Agreed.
DaDrunkenDwarf : kosher....
Angyl1999 : me nxt! me next!
Angyl1999 : lol
Vocephus : It's a jewish thing...you wouldn't understand..
(I will have to ask Vocephus to explain the whole kosher concept…damn jews…I hope none of you are Jews. If you are I am sorry but what is up with the word Kosher?)
Shaymee1 : lol
Madam_Tada : wait
Angyl1999 : just kidding
Madam_Tada : let me talk to jayboy first
Shaymee1 : JB!!!!!!!!
JoyBoyWG : Here I am oh ! great lady
Vocephus : Fair enough.
Madam_Tada : what was your question
JoyBoyWG : Hi Shame
Angyl1999 : i'm actually not jewish
Shaymee1 : hiii sweetie
Angyl1999 : but oh, well
Madam_Tada : quiet everyone
Vocephus : It's okay. I still love you.
JoyBoyWG : My question was "Why did U want my name and date of birth"
Shaymee1 : shhhhhhh
Angyl1999 : yes ma'm
Madam_Tada : cause i need to get a little infor about you in order to give you a reading
Shaymee1 : yes ..get vibration
Angyl1999 : thank you vocephus
Madam_Tada : now first off
DaDrunkenDwarf : me too
JoyBoyWG : Okay here is a big one, Will I ever get to see my dream girl and who will she be
Madam_Tada : i cant give you exact answers
Madam_Tada : i can only guide you to the truth
JoyBoyWG : Guide me , Oh ! Great Lady
Madam_Tada : ok
DaDrunkenDwarf : cause that would be real fortune telling
(As you can see, I could already tell she was a quack. I like that word. I hope it made sense. Anyways I decided to go along with it.)
Madam_Tada : now what is your dream lady
Madam_Tada : is this some one you dream about or what(Personal Note: Duh!)
8Angyl1999 is away.
JoyBoyWG : Well...... yes
8Angyl1999 has left the conversation.
Madam_Tada : hmmmmm
Madam_Tada : so you havent met her
JoyBoyWG : not in person
DaDrunkenDwarf : I want to see the Tada part come into play
Madam_Tada : well do you think she would like to meet you(Yet another Personal Note: ………Now who is the psychic?)
JoyBoyWG : Ha Ha I hope she does
Madam_Tada : well what qualities do you offer
Madam_Tada : why should she like you
JoyBoyWG : Well, That is for U to tell me I guess
DaDrunkenDwarf : speak my brotha!
Madam_Tada : now i cant tell you everything
Madam_Tada : but wait
Shaymee1 : gosh
Madam_Tada : i sense someone else in your life
JoyBoyWG : Gee
Madam_Tada : someone you have not met yet
JoyBoyWG : met....???? no
DaDrunkenDwarf : then how is she in your life...
Madam_Tada : she is about your height and age
8Angyl1999 has joined the conversation.
Shaymee1 : hiii angy
JoyBoyWG : I have not seen her
Madam_Tada : and very pretty
JoyBoyWG : so I would not know
Angyl1999 : i'm back, can i have my turn yet?
Madam_Tada : but you will meet her
Vocephus : Nope.
JoyBoyWG : where ?
Vocephus : Yer after me, kid.
Angyl1999 : can i be next, i need to go soon
(Don’t worry, Angyl did this for the entire chat. But after awhile she grows on you…like a fungus, a green slimy one)
Madam_Tada : just a sec angry
Angyl1999 : ?
Madam_Tada : do you still go to school
JoyBoyWG : nope
Angyl1999 : please....i will love you all
JoyBoyWG : passed that age
Angyl1999 : [flower picture]
Angyl1999 : [kisses]
JoyBoyWG : [flower picture]
Angyl1999 : [assorted pictures]
DaDrunkenDwarf : You don't bring me flowers...(Personal Note: Damn Barbra Streisand!)
Vocephus : Hey, I'm in the hospital, and I need to know if I'm going to get a spleen donor or not.
Madam_Tada : there is this place that you like to go to a lot
Angyl1999 : wahy not?
JoyBoyWG : yes
Madam_Tada : you will met her at this place
Angyl1999 : can't i bring you flowers?
Vocephus : That, and next Saturday's lotto numbers..
DaDrunkenDwarf : you can...you just don't...
JoyBoyWG : where ?
Angyl1999 : don't you like my flowers?
Angyl1999 : don't you like my flowers?
Madam_Tada : too many questions
Vocephus : They're very...digital.
Shaymee1 : gosh
JoyBoyWG : I like your flowers
DaDrunkenDwarf : they were for Tada...not me
Vocephus : Oh.
Angyl1999 : spleen donor my a**
Angyl1999 : lol
JoyBoyWG : a little thing in exchange for your flowers [present picture]
Angyl1999 : thank you
Vocephus : It's a bomb!
Shaymee1 : gosh, nice
Angyl1999 : no
DaDrunkenDwarf : nobody loves me...you all drove me to drinking!!!!
(I couldn’t help me, they drove me into a bitter drunken rage. Well, I would have done it anyways…but now I had an excuse)
Angyl1999 : !!!!!!!!!
Madam_Tada : but jayboy you have to watch for her
Angyl1999 : BS
JoyBoyWG : I am
Vocephus : Okay, okay...settle down, kids...yer mussing up the vibrations.
Madam_Tada : ok thats all i can say right now
JoyBoyWG : but hsmae won't help me in "Watching her"
JoyBoyWG :
Angyl1999 : are you about done joyboy
JoyBoyWG : yup
Madam_Tada : ok next person
Angyl1999 : i need my turn so i can go
Angyl1999 : me!!!
Vocephus : That'd be me.
Vocephus : nope!
Madam_Tada : vocephus
Vocephus : Ha!
Angyl1999 : noooooo!!!!!
Madam_Tada : name and birthdate
Shaymee1 : lol
Angyl1999 : ur mean
Angyl1999 : lol
Vocephus : *ahem*...okay, now what do you need from me, Madam?
Madam_Tada : patience
DaDrunkenDwarf : He's mean? You don't bring me flowers...anymore(Personal Note: Barbra just wouldn’t get out of my head! I swear it was evil subliminal messages! The bitch must be stopped)
Angyl1999 : Heather Jan 4, 1982
Vocephus : Right....(winks at Angyl)
Angyl1999 : lol
Madam_Tada : vocephus
Vocephus : Yes'm?
Madam_Tada : name and birthdate
Angyl1999 : go ahead(she says begrudgingly)
Madam_Tada : first name only
Angyl1999 : *sigh*
Angyl1999 : lol
Vocephus : Fair enough....Shaun, April the 29th, in the year of our Lord 1981
Angyl1999 : but i want to be next......please
DaDrunkenDwarf : nope!
DaDrunkenDwarf : I am
Angyl1999 : hey
Angyl1999 : ur mean
DaDrunkenDwarf : :P
Madam_Tada : ok vocephus what is your question
Shaymee1 : lol
Vocephus : Angyl, I do have mild psychic ability...you can ask me stuff. I mean, that too. A tarot card lady in L.A. said I did, and so did my psychic friend Laura at my college...
(Could Vocephus be telling the truth? Doubtful. Have to ask him sometime…)
Vocephus : Okay, Madam...gimmie a sec to think of a good one.
Shaymee1 : gosh
Madam_Tada : and dont ask about your spleen
Madam_Tada : just a general question please
Madam_Tada : no lotto numbers
Vocephus : Alright, is the girl that sits next to me in Film Class the girl for me?
Madam_Tada : no
Madam_Tada : but she likes you
Madam_Tada : and you may date her a while
Vocephus : Dammit! Okay, how about the girl in the coffee shop?
Madam_Tada : but there is someone else
Vocephus : Really?
8Angyl1999 has left the conversation.
JoyBoyWG : coffe shop ?
Shaymee1 : lol
JoyBoyWG : ooooooohhhh
JoyBoyWG : I know her too
Madam_Tada : yeah, but you have not met her yet
JoyBoyWG : LOL
Vocephus : There's a girl that works in the coffee shop in the mall I work at.
Shaymee1 : lol
Shaymee1 : is she cute?
Madam_Tada : well she likes you too, but she is not the one
Shaymee1 : gosh
JoyBoyWG : Hey Vocephus, That is the dream girl that I was talking about
Vocephus : I have not met here...okay, let's test a theroy...where will I meet this girl?
JoyBoyWG : on earth
Madam_Tada : well not in school, and not at the coffee shop
JoyBoyWG : J
Vocephus : Golly. Thanks JoyBoy.
Madam_Tada : wait
JoyBoyWG : You are welcome
Madam_Tada : do you like to take walks
Vocephus : Yes, as a matter of fact I do.
Madam_Tada : in the park or somewhere
Vocephus : ...something like that.
8Angyl1999 has joined the conversation.
Angyl1999 : my comp. screwed up
JoyBoyWG : WB ANgy
Madam_Tada : you may meet her on one of your walks
Angyl1999 : but i'm back now
Madam_Tada : but it will be a while
Vocephus : Okay...what's she gonna look like?
JoyBoyWG : Yup, U R back
Madam_Tada : dont rush it
Angyl1999 : and i want to be next
DaDrunkenDwarf : L
Vocephus : Ah...so in the mean time, should I date the girl in my Film class?
Angyl1999 : please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
8mizsk0 has joined the conversation.
Vocephus : Yer dissin' Dwarf, Angyl!
Shaymee1 : hiii mizky
Madam_Tada : you can, but dont forget about the other girl
Madam_Tada : that you will meet later
Angyl1999 : you have to wait your turn mizsk
Angyl1999 : i'm next
DaDrunkenDwarf : Voce gets all the luck with girls
(See this is what I meant by his other people. The guys is the pimp with ladies according to Madam Tada. I hope I get a good reading)
Vocephus : Alright...so I take it I shouldn't explain this to the girl in Film class..."I'm only dating you until I meet a girl while taking a walk someday. I hope you'll understand."
DaDrunkenDwarf : You are forgetting about me "Angyl"
Madam_Tada : no dont look at it that way
Angyl1999 : no i'm not
Shaymee1 : gosh, nice idea voce
Angyl1999 : you can be after me
Angyl1999 : lol
Madam_Tada : just date her and have fun
Shaymee1 : fun
Vocephus : But she likes me, huh?
Madam_Tada : and dont worry about the other girl
Madam_Tada : that you will have to find out
mizsk0 : my turn
Vocephus : Can I get one more question in?
Angyl1999 : no way
Vocephus : It's a quickie.
Madam_Tada : i really need to get to the others
mizsk0 : deby 12/10
Angyl1999 : you have to wait your turn
Madam_Tada : ok real quick
Angyl1999 : get in line
DaDrunkenDwarf : my turn
Angyl1999 : i'm after dwarf
Vocephus : Okay...I just got a new job....where do you see it heading?
mizsk0 : taking too long
Shaymee1 : up
Vocephus : Cry me a river, mizsk.
Angyl1999 : misk has to wait like the rest of us
mizsk0 : oh shut(Personal Note: Can’t finish sentence)
Madam_Tada : that will take too long to answer
Angyl1999 : build me a bridge.....
Vocephus : Aw, really?
Madam_Tada : lets do it some other time ok
Angyl1999 : and get the f**k over it!!!!!!!!!!!
Madam_Tada : drunken you turn
DaDrunkenDwarf : Yay!!!
(Finally my turn! The whole night was winding to a close so why not go out with a bang)
Vocephus : Alright, go Dwarf!
Madam_Tada : name and birth day
Angyl1999 : we've been waiting too long for you to butt in front
DaDrunkenDwarf : My name is Al and I was born 8/8/81
Madam_Tada : you are next angry
Vocephus : Oh, yeah....5 minutes is an eternity.
Madam_Tada : ok
JoyBoyWG : Angry it is
8mizsk0 has left the conversation.
Shaymee1 : lol
Madam_Tada : what is your question
Angyl1999 : thannk you
8Funky_Chook has joined the conversation.
Madam_Tada : drunken
DaDrunkenDwarf : My question is there is this bartender that I see often...does she like me?
Shaymee1 : hiii funky
8cpf_munkey has joined the conversation.
Shaymee1 : hiiii ceepee
cpf_munkey : what
8cpf_munkey has left the conversation.
Funky_Chook : hi
Angyl1999 : everyone has to wait their turn
Madam_Tada : she likes you, but not in the way you expect
Angyl1999 : i'm next
DaDrunkenDwarf : I mean...I am short...she is tall...we are from two different worlds...but the one thing we have in common is alcohol
DaDrunkenDwarf : what do you mean?
Vocephus : haha....alcohol; the cause of, and solution to all of life's problems.
Madam_Tada : well alcohol may not be the best thing here
Madam_Tada : do you go to the bar to just meet her or what
DaDrunkenDwarf : I go there to drink as well...it is a bar
Madam_Tada : i sense that you might meet someone at another place
Madam_Tada : but not the bar
DaDrunkenDwarf : hmmmm
Angyl1999 : are you about done dwarf?
DaDrunkenDwarf : no
Madam_Tada : you need to find other places to go
Angyl1999 : ok
DaDrunkenDwarf : like?
Angyl1999 : just asking
DaDrunkenDwarf : the internet?
Angyl1999 : i'll go wait in the corner like a good girl now
Shaymee1 : lol
Madam_Tada : maybe work or a secret place you go to
DaDrunkenDwarf : the internet?(Personal Note: Why can’t I find love on the internet?)
Vocephus : Hey, I was serious when I said I have some mild psychic abiity, Angyl...I'll talk to you if you really want, while your waiting.
Madam_Tada : the internet is not good either
DaDrunkenDwarf : oh....
Madam_Tada : you need to find a new hobby first
Madam_Tada : thats all i can say right now
8Awesome_Rabbit has joined the conversation.
DaDrunkenDwarf : what kind of hobby?
DaDrunkenDwarf : I need answers!
Awesome_Rabbit : hello madam tada
DaDrunkenDwarf : Hey Angyl...you are next...and you know that I love you
Angyl1999 : first off.....
Angyl1999 : wait ur turn
Angyl1999 : love you too
Madam_Tada : ok angry
Madam_Tada : your turn
Shaymee1 : lol
DaDrunkenDwarf : but Madam Tada said it would never work...I'm sorry
Madam_Tada : name and birth date
Angyl1999 : Heather Jan 4, 1982
Angyl1999 : lol dwarf
DaDrunkenDwarf : I guess a drunken dwarf has no luck on the internet
Madam_Tada : ok what is your questin
Madam_Tada : question
Vocephus : Say Drunken....you wanna keep in touch after this session is over...?
Angyl1999 : is the guy i'm with now the one i'm meant to marry?
Angyl1999 : '
DaDrunkenDwarf : sure..I could use a buddy
So overall a great night. I am sad to say though that if anyone who read this fell in love with me, it won’t work cause Madam Tada said I won’t find love on the internet. But if you email me or leave a message on the WOV Message Board, I will give you my address so we can “bump into each other.” I am kidding…not really…yes I am…well no. Oh well. Until my next exploit…Happy Chatting!
