NASCAR:  "Neck - Tel Series"
		As if you haven't noticed already, the latest controversy in the ever popular Nascar's "Neck-tel" series, is that Tony Stewart is being accused of breaking some of the rules in the Tropicana 400 at the Chicagoland speedway ran on July 11, 2004.  When I heard this I had to sit down.  "Tony Steward is accused of breaking rules"  I couldn't fathom this.  For heaven's sake I thought everyone was clear on the basic "RULES" of Nascar.  They are as follows: 1)  Drive Fast 2)  Turn Left And that pretty much sums up the controversy of ..........  WAIT WAIT, this just in.  I have just been handed a memo with the  amendments for the  new Nascar rules, and they are as follows: 3)  A mullet 4)  No more than 5 teeth in your grill 5)  A relative on your arm So, after all if worse comes to worse Stewart will be put on probation, and fined 3 cases of Paps Blue Ribbon, 2 cans of Skoal, and a gun rack.  Oh well, race another day, and remember do not look directly at your children.
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