| August 6, 2003 Current Events --Everytime I hear “current events”, I think of Mr. Merrill’s 10 question current events quizzes every Friday. They sucked. • So I’m sure everyone thinks I’m going to address the whole gay Episcopalian bishop thingy. Well you’re wrong, but I’m going to address it indirectly because I’m tired of all the media. This whole fiasco should come as no surprise to anyone. America and its participants in general are heading (have been for a while) into moral decay. I call it the Third Law of Spiritualdynamics. And mark my words, this will not be the end of “churches” doing things like this. The Episcopalian church (at least the liberal sect) is only the forerunner to many denominations and other false religions suppressing the truth of Scripture in order to make way for happy and warm feelings. I guarantee you within the next 5 to 10 to 20 years, other denominations and Christian cults will begin to accept not only homosexuality (note I distinguished between the sin and the sinner) in their congregations but also in leadership positions. They will all the sudden have new “revelations” from Satan, err I mean God, to accept all peoples’ lifestyles (totally missing the point of addressing sin at its source) and will interpret Scripture to fit their emotions and experiences (not to mention their failing budgets) instead of using the inerrant, unchanged truth of Scripture as guides to live optimal lives resulting from amazing grace. So you can use your church’s stance on sins like homosexuality as a litmus test as to whether they are authentic or not. It seems to be the popular thing for some churches to “change” with the changing society. Last time I checked and tested, the Bible hasn’t changed since its inception; we’re still on the 1st edition, not a latter one. Christians shouldn’t compromise Scripture to do what’s popular or cave into peer pressure (see Romans 12:2). Now you realize why I’m anti-“church” and anti-denomination. My doctrine is the inerrant (provably so) word of God and only that. My church is the person of Jesus Christ, not of him, huge difference. Feelings, emotions, and experiences don’t come into play when you’re deciding whether to accept 2 + 2 = 4 as truth or lie. So I’m already tired of talking about this and I’d do my best not to bring it up again. All the faithful readers of Random Thoughts already know my stance. Let us reason... • Here’s another gay-related thing that’s perplexed me. Its seems the Bravo TV channel has come out with a show called Queer Eye for the Straight Guy (very popular I might add). The premise of the show is taking 5 or 6 gay guys, who seemingly have a superior fashion sense because of their gayism (huh?), and giving one poor heterosexual shmuck, who’s apparently living a fashion faux-pas lifestyle, a huge makeover. These gay guys supposedly come in and show him what’s hot and what’s not. Moralities aside, let’s investigate the underlying irony here. Apparently gay men are sexually attracted to men. So logically, being attracted to them, they would live their lives and fashion their world in a manner that would supposedly be attractive to other men. Same goes for heterosexual guys in the sense that they live their lives and fashion their world in a manner that would supposedly be attractive to females. Despite the fact that these gay men from the show may be experts in fashioning men to attract other men, what heterosexual male in his right mind would want tips and tricks from an individual only concerning in attracting its own gender?! Those straight guys on the show are truly poor shmucks. Why would he want a makeover from guys that have no motive to attract females, the very thing a heterosexual wants to do with his fashion??? Does anyone else see the obvious irony here? How can this show be a success? Are they trying to convert these straight guys to gayism? I just don’t get it. I’m truly vexed from a logical standpoint. August 6, 2003 Expedition 2003 --I must say I’m truly intrigued and enthralled at this expedition that archeologist Bob Ballard (the discoverer of the Titanic wreck) and his team are undergoing in the Black Sea at the moment. Check out the website here: Expedition 2003 They’ve been here before but they’re back again in this summer 2003 exploring and discovering even more cool stuff. The rare anoxic (no oxygen) waters of the Black Sea make for an archeologist’s dream in that the lack of oxygen has preserved artifacts almost perfectly for over thousands of years because no oxygenated corrosion agents and organisms can live in the anoxic water. Truly remarkable stuff! I recommend checking out the site and all the cool stuff they got there. Personally I’m addicted to that webcam they have set up. It’s like watching archeology in real-time! Indiana Jones would be jealous. August 1, 2003 Is infidelity ‘natural’ for men? --Ha......haha.......hahahahaha....oohe....hehe....wahowa....haha...oooo....ooo....heh.. Ok, my tummy hurts. Gosh I don’t even know how to exactly respond to this. I can’t even believe so much money was probably invested in these studies. I mean what a waste of money. That’s almost as much a waste of money as money spent on SETI (Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence). Well without further ado, I’ll answer that question with a resounding YES OF COURSE IT IS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A fruit loop from Easter Island could’ve answered that for you correctly. Heck, the contestants of Who Wants to be a Millionaire could’ve even probably got that right. Let’s set the record straight, men are sinful, we’re born sinful, and we’ll die sinful. Hence the word “damned”. Everyman (excluding homosexual men who apparently have the same sort of problem with the same sex) whether is be me, a police officer, your minister, a priest, a politician, a food critic, a student, a babysitter, a banana picker, a bum, etc. inherently wants to have sex with anything we’re attracted to that moves and has breasts. That is our natural humanistic inclination. And not only do we want to have sex, but as the article title suggests, we want to have it with as many possible women as many possible times. Yes, these sinful desires ebb and flow with age progression, but they remain always and are most potent during our youth. You might ask, Keith that can’t be true because not every man does what you say they want to do. Yep, but every man thinks about doing that in some shape or form, and everyman has the capacity to do that. So when you’re respected member of the community comments about how evil and bad that man on the TV convicted of rape is, politely remind him he has the same capacity to do that and probably (can’t give men’s minds the benefit of the doubt) has thought about it. Advise him to take the log out of his own eye before he comments on the speck in his neighbor’s. The only difference between man and animal though is our conscience. When “rape” occurs in the animal kingdom (I’ve never seen a male monkey ask permission to have sex with a female monkey), it’s displayed on the Discovery Channel. When rape occurs in human society, it’s on Court TV. There is a difference between men who choose not have sex with every woman you see, even though the natural inclination is to. You have two kinds of abstinent men: those that wish to please themselves and those that wish to please God. Yet both of these qualities are what distinguish us from animals. The quality of recognizing we have a conscience, a sense of right and wrong, and the quality of recognizing where that conscience came from. Many people, if not all, realize they have a conscience and live life according to it, perhaps, and most likely, suppressing that conscience to fit their needs and desires. And a few people realize that conscience must’ve come from something or someone, a higher power if you will. The problem with men that resist their natural inclinations without recognizing a higher power (aka God) is that they ultimately do it to please themselves, doing the very thing they thought they were abstaining from. Let me explain. When a person does a good work, or resists doing a bad one, there are two possible motives behind the action. Either they are doing it to feel good about themselves, or they are doing it to honor their God. The problem with doing it because it feels good to do things is that is ultimately a selfish desire, much the same as rape. Rapists sure don’t rape women to make the women feel good, they do it to please themselves, selfishness. Yes that’s an extreme analogy but the heart of the issue is the same, pleasing oneself. The alternative is to do good works or not do bad things in response to the love Jesus shows/-ed us. That person doesn’t do good things looking for a reward, or to climb the ladder of holiness. Nope, it’s done out of thanks for when Christ died for all so we’d have the chance to avoid spending eternity in Hell. There’s nothing we can do or not do to deserve or un-deserve God’s grace. Anyways, back to the topic at hand. I know some women might be offended by my candid approach at this topic. Even a few guys might be offended or try to deny their carnal, sinful nature. Well to the women I say I’m sorry, but this is the truth. I GUARANTEE you all men you know have these thoughts and desires going through their heads despite what the outside of their lives may look like; hence Christ mentioning lust as the same infraction as physical adultery, furthering his mission to get to the heart of the matter. You might be saying, no way Keith, not Mr. Smith, not my wonderful father, or my great brothers, or my best friend, etc. They’re all truly nice guys Keith. (Queue the big error sound unfortunately) Sorry girl, but you do not know the male mind or how it works secretly. Believe me, I know, and I unfortunately have to live with it 24-7. The only real test of a Real Man is whether he has the humility to admit his damnable fallen-ness. If we had big screen TVs above our heads that floated around us wherever we went displaying what we were thinking, not only would you be utterly appalled and disgusted, you’d never talk to us again. Fortunately we’re all in the same boat spiritually (men and women being sinful beings just in generally different ways and sometimes the same) so we can still associate, talk to, be friends with, marry, etc. I’m sure us men would be appalled, maybe not disgusted (or maybe), if we saw the TVs above your girls’ heads displaying your secret, “nobody knows” thoughts. Point is the truth is we men are wired to not only want sex, but with many partners. Again, as humans though, we have the ability to gauge right and wrong and that which could entail grave consequences. For example, that’s why God admonishes against fornication and polygamy throughout the Bible. He knows that only a monogamous relationship, within the confines of marriage, is the most satisfying, pleasing arrangement spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically. And sheesh, you don’t even need the Bible to figure that one out too. It’s pure logic. Any Joe could figure out it’s most fulfilling and optimal to have one wife and to not have sexual relations with that wife till you’ve tied the knot. It’s the only way to develop pure trust in the person, and the only way for that person to display (through lack of action until the action that commences on the wedding night) that they really love only you, that they are being selfless instead of selfish, and that they would give and do anything for you. You’ll see most of God’s “commandments” (I like to call them “optimal living suggestions”) are just simple logical decrees such as a father telling their three year old not to touch the hot stove. It’s not out of tyranny, but out of love because he doesn’t want his son hurting himself. So in conclusion, yes, the study came to the right conclusion, but they sure wasted unneeded energy and dollars on getting there. I could’ve told you this since Adam and Eve ate that damn apple. You might be wondering why God would’ve even created things like sex and stuff if we abuse them so much physically and mentally. Well when he initially created the cosmos, he didn’t have to deal with a stubborn creation. But now, because we all ate the apple we shouldn’t have, we have a tougher time living. God gave us guidelines to follow in the meantime, and if men and women follow these logical guidelines, sex and marriage can be some of the most wonderful things we as humans can experience in this fallen world for the 80 or so years we’re on it. But I think we put too much wahoo in things like sex and marriage. I mean when the New Creation comes around, things like sexual desire and marriage will be such a distant memory and inferior product, we will be wondering why we wallowed in the mud so much with them. People need a more “eternal” perspective on things. Nothing we see now will stay. When you live with that perspective, things are much more peaceful. I just found it funny that they did so much to come to such an easy conclusion. Just look outside your window, read your newspaper, examine your own heart and you’ll see how easy it was to come to. Things like rape, infidelity, adultery, and fornication have existed since the dawn of man. They exist now. And I guarantee you they will exist till my man Yeshua comes back to chill. There will be no “Star Trek” peace confederation scenario, not human “enlightenment”. We will continue to sin, die, and make more babies that will grow up to sin; tis the cycle of a fallen world, falling all around me... Grace-induced honesty and humility is the only thing that can save us. “I waited patiently for the Lord He inclined and heard my cry He brought me up out of the pit Out of the miry clay” - 40 by U2 July 31, 2003 Random Thoughts • The summer sucks sans professional football, basketball, or hockey. • Hot chicks are a dime a dozen. • President Bush is so much cooler when he’s just himself, like when he was answering questions on the fly at his press conference yesterday. His pre-arranged speeches are too pre-arranged. • Girls probably become lesbians because of guys’ selfish sexual desires. Guys probably become homosexuals because of guys’ selfish sexual desires. • The United States of America will crash and burn one day, just like Rome did, just like Assyria did, just like Persia did, and just like Babylon did. I just hope I’m not around when the fallout occurs. • The last Bond movie, Die Another Day, sucked. Almost as bad as Denise Richards playing a nuclear physicist. • The difference between Christians and any other person is that a real Christian’s life ultimately revolves around only Christ. Any other person’s life ultimately revolves around that person. Christocentrism vs. Meism. • The problem with making the wrong decision is that you can later justify it as “it was meant to happen” instead of taking responsibility for making a stupid choice. Can’t argue because everything that does happen was in fact meant to happen. It if it wasn’t meant to happen, it wouldnt’ve happened. So we don’t have a choice to make a right or wrong decision, right? Well no because we don’t know where the chips may fall even though God may know. Ah, the advantages that must come with working outside the confines of this cursed 4th dimension. Can’t wait to relinquish it. • I find it better to stick to facts than to feelings. Feelings are untrustworthy and the source is always in question, facts are immovable, indisputable, and mostly importantly, honest. Even better when the facts and feelings agree with one another. • Why are some people so afraid to fall in love? Why are some people so willing to fall in love? Where’s the happy medium between security and accepting blessing? I can’t help but attribute patience as the most important factor governing love. • Communism would work if we weren’t human. It’s perceived existence is a moot thought considering the circumstances. July 30, 2003 ROTK Trailer --Um yeah. Some little movie called Lord of the Rings: Return of the King is coming out sometime this winter and some nerds think it’s like the best thing since the Atari 2600. Personally, this type of movie isn’t my kind of thing. Too long, too boring, and what’s with all these Harry Putter wannabe’s? Anyways, looks like New Line Cinema either leaked out or had stolen a trailer for the movie, being the first released. Here are some links to the trailers. No doubt these links are being inundated by the hordes of mollycoddles trying to get a glimpse of their beloved series. I don’t see what all the hub-bub is folks. It’s just a bunch of little people and old people and guys in tights prancing around like ponies. Trailer link 1 Trailer link 2 Trailer link 3 Trailer link 4 July 30, 2003 Tough Choices --This topic is sometimes avoided in social circles, but I must address it head on. You can never be too careful because this could happen to you one day and its best to be at least mentally prepared to face these challenges. Let’s dive into it, shall we? The question in question is whether you would rather face a great white shark out for your blood in the middle of deep waters, or would you rather face an adult lion out for your blood in the middle of a wide open, flat plain? You have no weapons save your bare hands and there are no objects to hold onto or use as projectiles. It is mano e sharko, mano e liono (Thundercats anyone?). Of course there are no wrong answers but the right answer here is to face the lion. Face it, you have no chance whatsoever against the shark in his domain, you are totally outmatched. Against the lion, you have a glimmer of a chance, being that you’re on your natural turf. Let’s weigh in the pros and cons of each life-threatening scenario. Shark scenario: Pros: - The shark is out for blood, but usually its seal or dolphin blood its out for. It’s possible that after taking a bite out of your leg or torso, it might realize its mistake that you aren’t in fact an 800lb juicy seal. - Studies have shown that if you punch a shark in the nose it sometimes leaves you alone. - The shark may see you, the sitting duck, as too easy a prey. Being that sharks of a sporting nature, it may give you a head start or allow you to swim away entirely. - Being that the movie Jaws gave great whites a bad name, the shark may want to prove to you it is of a caring and non-threatening nature. It may even bring a sand-dollar as a sign of friendship. Cons: - The shark is out for blood. Human blood is blood. The shark will utterly tear you apart until every last ounce of your hemoglobins are digested. - Studies have shown that if you punch a shark in the nose it sometimes leaves you alone. (Yeah right! Haha, tell that to your arm when its 10 feet away from your body in no time flat.) - Being that you have no vantage point, no solid ground in which to garner a defensive position, and no ability to see clearly underwater with the naked eye....need I go on? - Have you ever seen Shark Week on the Discovery Channel?...I rest my case. Lion scenario: Pros: - Stories do tell of men that have bested lions. It’s been done before so that means it can be done again. - Lions have low endurance. If you can hand around till about round 9 or 10, you may have a fighting chance to outlast it. - Being that you’re on solid ground, you can prepare a defense against the lion as it attacks you. A lucky solid first blow to a vital area could end the fight before it starts. - Lions have lots of hair. If lions have as much problem as girls do when you pull their hair, you could use this to your advantage. - A lion’s mouth is much smaller than a shark’s mouth. Even though you may lose a hand, you might still have a stub of an arm to still attack. - Use the lion’s weight against itself. Think Judo. Cons: - Lions maintain the legend as “kings of the jungle”. There’s a reason for that. - Lions eat much more frequently than sharks. Chances are when it sees you, it’s hungry. - The lion may have to put food on the table for the family back home. Never underestimate the desire of a parent to provide for their children. - The lion has more ways in which to assault you compared to the shark. Not only does it have a mouth with sharp teeth, but the sharp claws and powerful paws make Mike Tyson’s punches look like Raggedy Ann's. - We’ve all seen The Lion King. Mufaso was one tough mo-fo. So there you have it, the analytical approach to these ever-present, life-threatening scenarios. But please, for your own pride, select the best choice when an employer asks you this question at an interview. Remember, it could be the difference between getting the job or not. July 29, 2003 Coming to an EbbWorld near you!... --The Adventures of Pfitternook Pfisterbrook! From the famed writer of The Scattered Few and American Virgin comes an engaging exciting story about a boy who learns about life, love, and why on the high seas of Veronia! From his humble beginnings as a fisherman’s apprentice, you’ll be swept into a world of wonder and beauty as Pfitternook journeys into the unknown along with his band of friends known as the Ocean Adventurers. Thrust into a world peril and danger, the Ocean Adventures must defy all odds to survive the harsh realities of life! Join in their adventurers as they battle nefarious enemies, make the unlikeliest of friends, and uncover the mysteries of the world! You’ve never delved into your imagination until you’ve tagged along with Pfitternook Pfisterbrook and one of his amazing exploits. Jump on the boat! July 28, 2003 Weekend = good --I had a good weekend. There was a little scary part on Sunday morning when I thought I had lost my wallet, but turns out it was in my car the whole time (silly Keith). Just thought I’d let Random Thoughts know I had a good weekend. Spent some cool time with cool people. I even went shopping and bought $209 worth of clothes on Sat. night! Can you believe it? I can’t either. You can thank fashion buff Marit for matching things and giving me pointers. I’m starting to realize the advantages (many) of having a girl with you. I played video games at an arcade too Sat. night which is just cool anytime you do that. Got to hang with the fam and kiddles on Sunday. Always fun, well until the kiddles get too rowdy and cry. Anyways, just thought I’d reiterate to myself that I had a good weekend. Although my penny is leaving me :( but she’ll be back :) She made a promise like Samwise Gamgee, and I’m gonna hold it to her like Gandalf the Grey. July 28, 2003 More videogame stuff --Hey y’all. I wrote a little tidbit concerning video game lifestyles and religion on a message thread over at www.gamespot.com. Might be for interesting reading. Here’s the link to the thread. My input is below. May have to rebut some rebuttals though in the future. Does religion affect your gaming lifestyle? Guess it depends on what "religion" you subscribe to. Most world religions, cults, etc. require a certain status quos you must live up to to "earn" your place in heaven, nirvana, etc. So violating certain precepts to your religion would most definitely "affect" your spiritual standing within your fellowship of believers as well with your god/gods. These precepts, principles, laws, etc. usually relate to all forms of life whether it be entertainment, social issues, etc., so I'd think video gaming would be included. It also depends how zealous you are within that specific faith. And ultimately it comes down to responsibility for your actions. If you subscribe to atheism for example, your supposedly aren't eternally responsible for any of your actions because you believe there is no god, ergo no eternity. You die, become worm food, and that's that. Video game lifestyle hardly would come into play when considering your moral compass. In contrast, if you subscribe to something such as Christianity, you believe in a supposed divine moral code that should direct your every move, aka Holy Spirit (conscience if you will). And you believe that death is indeed not the end and that you will be responsible for your actions. You not only are subject to a written code, but also a heart code that supposedly dwells inside you, resulting in "guilt" if you fail to meet the standard. How this relates to video gaming is vastly different than the examplary atheistic gamer who has no one to answer to spiritually. So when a Christian gamer sits down to play Dead or Alive Beach Volleyball, he may remember his God, Jesus, say that "whoever looks looks at a woman lustifully commits adultery in his heart". He then has the choice to continue playing, committing adultery, a sin, or to stop playing and free himself from the "guilt". I understand the question is "Does religion affect your gaming lifestyle?" and that nobody asked for a disseration on philosophy of life, but I think a background was necessary to delineate between whether you believe in absolute right or wrong or whether you don't. If you don't, ideas like religion and guilt are no-shows in your daily life and this question is moot for you. If you do believe in absolute wrong and right, well you have a choice to make about whether you want to live your life according to that standard or not. Personally I think religion sucks in the man-made sense. I think denominations divide instead of unite. And I think anybody's attempt to "earn" favor with a perfect God is silly. I follow a Palestinian Jew from the 1st century, and I like to read the book that talks about him. My heart's desire to is live for Him, because I know He paid a dear price for me just so he could have the chance to hug me and show he loves me more than I could imagine. In the grand scheme of things is playing Grand Theft Auto or Dead or Alive going to determine whether you go to Heaven or Hell? Heck no. I think it's pretty clear no matter what we do wrong and no matter what we do right, we'll still never live up to the standard of perfection that God requires. So in terms of my gaming lifestyle, It's not like I don't play certain games because I think I'll go to Hell if I do. Just the same as I know my eternal destination isn't dependent upon whether I do a certain number of good works or get baptized or whatever. All I know is that I'm a damned sinner and I deserve the depths of Hell for my continual infractions. But I'll do my best to honor my God who paid such a price for me by trying to stay away from things that I know will hurt me. If certain video games violate my conscience, I'll try to stay away. But I'm only human, and my humaness usually gets the best of me. The only thing saving me from hellish perdition is amazing grace....oh how sweet the sound. Thanks for listening to my blabbing. I think this is a hot topic but a lot of people may refrain from speaking because they're fearful of what people might say. I'm not tryin to bash any one religion or any non-religion. I encourage everyone to search out truth themselves, never believe something just because someone says it, and always ask questions. I also encourage you to listen to your conscience when it comes to gaming. Don't succumb to peer pressure, be your own person, and do what you know is right inside. I prolly got too much into "religion" and I'm sorry. I tried to tie it into gaming as much as possible. I think gaming lifestyles are a "heart" issue, not a "religious" issue. It is our wonderful form of entertainment, whether with friends or alone. But usually with all things originating from pure motives like video games, man seems to find a way to tarnish and degrade them. Just gotta know how to sift through all the trash to get to the treasures :) Peace and love fellow gamers, from a member of the church of the dropouts and loosers and sinners and failures and the fools July 25, 2003 Keith’s Virginia Tech True/False Trivia Challenge Answers --My trivia challenge has been a success of sorts. Got some interesting feedback and it seems I have some people on the edge of their seats. People want answers people! So here they are. 1. True- Most guys would have no problem with these scenarios. And not to say I had a problem either, although it was a bit surprising a couple of times. But my dorm was nothing compared to another dorm on campus called Pritchard, Playboy magazine’s 1999 highest rated “sexually active college dorm in America”. 2. True- As uncharacteristic of me as it may seem. No I didn’t party hardy or anything. I was down there for a intramural soccer tournament and one of the guys on my team had a friend that said we could crash at his frat house that night. 3. False- Despite my hefty college appetite, the feat was never a reality. 4. True- They knew me by first name down at the rec hall. I was a legend in those times. I may not had a girlfriend or been a huge partier, but I sure had a lot of fun playing arcades by myself. And who wouldn’t want free arcades?! 5. False- Completely false, never occured. 6. True- I was just as dumbfounded as you. We actually did talk some and hung out a couple of times. But she was looking for more than a friendship, I wasn’t. A couple months later, she was in a serious relationship with another guy. The story of every college girl. 7. False- I think the only person that would remember this stat would be my dad. Actually the last official game I played was the last game of the Spring season 2000 against Radford University. I played really well in the 15 minutes I got. It’s sad to think back about how it didn’t work out. I could’ve been a major contributor. Guess ya move on. 8. True- None other than thee Michael Vick folks! Haha, he was pretty cool. Real chill guy. In fact, I had a close friend that was in his “enterage” and reportedly had a thing between them at some point. She’s a really cool girl. Haven’t seen her in a long time though. 9. False- I think I substituted this fictional girl with a real girl I knew. My mind wanders sometimes. 10. False- mmmm Hawaiian Tropic Girls bikini contest......mmmm 11. True- Yeah, I don’t know what I was thinking either. I think I was in a bit of an insecure stage at that point like a “what have I got to lose?” phase. Maybe I was hoping to get selected so I could meet the “Girls of Virginia Tech” calendar girls. I don’t know. Was kind of weird having like 5 people looking and taking pictures of you in a closed room with your shirt off. 12. False- But my roomate and friend did. They invited me too. I thought they were crazy. They left on Sat. and got back Monday morning. Crazy guys, but what an adventure to tell the kids. 13. True- Well I guess it depends on your definition of “party”. But I really only went to one party where it was like a big one. The guys spilling beer on me wasn’t very fun. The girls acting like insecure sluttos wasn’t fun. And the bass-filled music wasn’t fun. Same story, different faces. Arcade games are fun. 14. False- But I did open the door to things I probably didn’t want to see. You always have to be careful before you open the dorm room door of a college male. 15. False- When I wrote this I thought it was true, but I remember I only got one ticket and I sold it to my RA for $100. Made $15 on the deal though. 16. True- The Legend lives on! 17. True- Grades smades. I was good friends with the backup quarterback to Michael Vick, Dave Meyer. He was about to hook me up. Looking back, I should’ve really pursued it. Football players get more chicks than soccer players. But soccer players “have good legs” according to most girls. 18. False- Hey I’m alright at beach volleyball. I got the height thing going for me. But yeah, I knew guys that spent like all day playing on the beach volleyball courts. That’s all they did! Well at least while there was light. 19. True- Happened pretty quick. But my stupendous driving skills (err God) saved me. 20. False- Ok, I’m being a little sarcastically hard on myself here. Although it could happen one day, but very, super unlikely. Almost as much a chance as Lord of the Rings: Return of the King not winning the Oscar for Best Picture this year. Well I hope you had fun taking my challenge. How’d you score? I guess I was reminiscing about the good and bad old days of Virginia Tech. I used to hate the place, but now I’m indifferent to it. Time does heal some wounds. Good day. July 25, 2003 Cyclic nature of gaming and online economic models --I submitted this article to Gamespot.com recently. Hopefully they’ll pick it for their guest article column. Might be a boring read. Oh well. Personally, I like to consider myself a cyclic hard-core gamer. Let me explain. I'm a hard-core gamer that plays games in cycles. No I don't play certain games for three months straight (don't know if anyone does) but I will play a game hard-core for a couple days straight, maybe even a week or two. Then that same game that I was so zealous about will sit for a period of time and collect dust. I'll pick it up again a few weeks or months, maybe even years later, and go through the same type of binge. That seems to be how it is with me and I'm sure many of you are the same way. This cyclic nature I believe could be integrated into many companies' online financial plans wisely. Take for example FFXI. I'm currently a beta tester. The game is great, intriguing to play, wonderful visuals, and just a good, new console experience. But alas my fairweather nature wins again. After playing the game profusely for about two weeks, I haven't touched it in about a month. Not that I don't like it, but the "novelty" sort of wore off. I can guarantee you though that I will be back at it sometime soon. This brings me to my point. Most companies, and I believe Square-Enix will implement this, charge customers of online games monthly fees to play. Yet I hardly think the majority of hard-core gamers, and especially the general gaming public, play a game for a month straight. And because we know we won't play a game that long continually, we are reluctant to plunk down a flat $10-15/month for the subscription. This in turn reduces the companies' potential profit and ability to obtain subscribers. I guess what I'm proposing is that companies offer "minutes" plans, similar to phone companies. We should have the option to basically pay what we play for. They could easily develop some financial strategy that would charge a player up to the minute or hour. This way we wouldn't feel slighted for paying for time we don't use. They could still offer monthly plans for those that don't want to hassle, but why not give the consumer more account flexibility? Or maybe give us "time allotted plans” that we could buy, like a prepaid calling card. Say $5 for 50 hours, $8 for 80 hours, and so on. And taking a queue from Cingular they could allow rollover minutes, even further increasing the consumers trust in getting what they pay for. I think game companies could learn a lot from they're cellular counterparts. Lots of people want to play games online, but lots of people don't want to pay for fees they won't use. This brings me to my final point and basis for this little dissertation. I really like FFXI. I will want to buy it went it comes out. I won't mind paying $50 for the game itself, that's usual. But to be perfectly honest, I'm not going to want to pay $15/month just to be able to play it. (I'm even complaining despite the fact I won't have to buy a HDD courtesy of the beta test.) But before you suggest that I don't buy if I'm not willing to pay the price, I will admit that I'd be willing to pay a more personalized subscription fee, that fits my lifestyle better. Maybe I'd pay more, maybe I'd pay less, but at least I'd have more control over my financial resources. Anybody else think more personalized subscription fees would be more beneficial to not only the consumer, but the companies offering the product, and just the community as a whole? July 24, 2003 The Passion trailer --I guarantee you’ll be seeing a lot of articles from me concerning Mel Gibson’s directed and produced movie called The Passion in coming months. The movie portrays the last 12 hours of the life of Christ and events surrounding it. The movie is a labor of love from Gibson, a devout Catholic, and reportedly accurately enacts the correlating Gospel account from the Book of John down to a T. Right down to the spoken Latin and Aramaic sans subtitles (although reports are that some subtitles will be shown). Refuting comments that without subtitles the audiences will be totally confused, Gibson says the visual images, the willing sacrifice, and the ambient tone will transcend language for all to understand. Also refuting claims that the movie is anti-Semitic, Gibson claims he is not anti-Semitic and his goal is to tell the truth through this movie. The movie is directed by Mel Gibson and the part of Jesus is played by Jim Caviezel (Frequency, The Count of Monte Cristo). Monica Bellucci plays the part of Mary Magdalene. A trailer has been released for the film, which has yet to garner a major distribution company. (right-click and “save as” if you want to download to your hard drive. read precaution below) Trailer link 1 Trailer link 2 I must warn you that this trailer depicts violent and graphic scenes. Knowing that the violence is willingly taken makes it all the more potent. I fully admit that I shedded tears the first time I saw this trailer. Just the trailer folks! This short preview is so engaging and powerful it drove me to tears. I’ve heard of movies that cause people to cry, but a three minute trailer? I’m scared at how emotional I’ll get when I actually see the full movie. And I don’t get emotional very often, at least on the outside. That scene where they throw the coins at Judas made my skin crawl... Personally this is a very important aspect of my life, the life and death of Jesus Christ. In fact it is my life. Yes, billions of movies have been made on the life of Christ, but none apparently come close to the captivating appeal of this one. It’s all real, its all authentically inspired, its a labor of love and its the truth. And damn the man that says that what Jesus did on that fateful day wasn’t enough to completely obliterate the barrier between God and man created by ourselves. When you see this movie you will see the original Gospel account acted out, word for word. The truth, from word to screen; a story of suffering, of sacrifice, of grace and ultimately....the greatest story ever told. *You may be wondering who that scary evil looking woman is. Apparently she represents you know who. The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you all July 24, 2003 Discipline and lazy --I’m not a structured person. I don’t keep personal schedules, don’t write down appointments, and don’t have a PDA. I don’t have too much going on so I figure I can just remember it all. And despite the fact that just because you have a schedule doesn’t mean you’ll actually do what’s scheduled. Anyways, I’m just saying I wuss out a lot on what I plan to do and I do the things I don’t want to do a lot. Call it the human condition. Call it sin disease. Call it whatever, but either way it’s why I’m kind of sick and tired of being stuck in this human costume. Here are some examples of how I try to justify my sin and/or not doing what I should and/or how I have pity parties. I’ve got all tomorrow to study, I don’t need to study now. (Fool) My boss won’t even know if I’m late, I can sleep in a little longer. (Talk about abuse) I can look at this webpage. Sheesh, I deserve this considering how I’m so much better than all my peers who are having sex and stuff. (Keith are you a freaking idiot? Don’t you know none are righteous? Click exit and run away as fast as you can.) I was wronged today so I’m not gonna be loving to my parents when I get home despite they had nothing to do with me being wronged and that they love me and would do anything for me. (Talk about abuse) I’m a victim of my society (Cry me a river why don’t you Keith. People are hurting, go help them.) Man I got all these great ideas in my head. People should respect me for how creative I am. (So Keith, got any books, screenplays, poetry published lately? Thought so. Can the ego and show me the money.) Nobody will know that I’m mentally undressing that girl over there. She won’t even know, so if I’m not hurting anyone, it can’t be wrong. (Chalk up another nail being nailed into your Savior’s hands Keith) Well God, I’m tight on finances these days ya know. I’m sorry, but I just can’t spare any change for you this month. (Hey Keith how’s that new video game you just spent $50 on playing? Or how about that new car part that you didn’t need that you bought for $150? You comfortable Keith? How bout another pillow?) As you can see, I’m a majorly sinful being that will try every escape route, every scapegoat to avoid being responsible for my actions and thoughts. I’ve even seen commercials lately about this drug to treat some phantom disease called AADD (Adult Attention Deficit Disorder). Can we get more irresponsible for our actions? When are people gonna start facing the music that they don’t have some sort of freakin chemical imbalance but a sin disease that only God can fix? When am I gonna understand that 24-7 instead of only Sunday mornings? Sheesh, we are truly a helpless race. July 24, 2003 I’m like mad and frustrated --So I’m walking into work and I need to get something in my bag. I take my sunglasses off and put them in my pants pocket, or so I thought. Anyways I’m walking past two men seemingly doing nothing (I won’t go into a further description for the suspects’ sake), I get the thing I need out of my bag and move on. Not more than 100 feet later I go to get my sunglasses that aren’t in my pocket anymore. In retrospect, I did remember hearing a clicking sound like sunglasses hitting the ground, but I attributed it initially to the construction site nearby. Well as you can probably guess, when I got back to where I thought my sunglasses would be, the two men were no where to be found as were my sunglasses. So I can make two three logical conclusions here. 1. The sunglasses did fall out of my pocket when I was walking but my 10+ minute search for them afterwards was not sufficient. They may still be on the wide open 12 feet of sidewalk and I just failed to see the black, very obvious, sunglasses. 2. A huge wind came down and swept the sunglasses into the Potomac River, never to be found again. 3. The two men just standing there noticed my sunglasses fall out of my pocket, and noticed that I didn’t notice. They reached down, stole my sunglasses, and walked away before I realized it or which way they went. I have nothing more to say and I really hope I’m wrong, for my human stereotypically-inclined sake. July 23, 2003 C.S. Lewis saves the day....yet again “If Christianity was something we were making up, of course we could make it easier. But it isn’t. We can’t compete, in simplicity, with people who are inventing religions. How could we? We’re dealing with fact. Of course anyone can be simple if he has no facts to bother about!” –C.S. Lewis You know, if there were three people I could have lunch with, they’d be C.S. Lewis, Blaise Pascal, and Paul of Tarsus. My boy Clive Staples’ (C.S.) simple quote above has solved one of the greatest intellectual spiritual conundrums I’ve had to deal with in my adult life. Why do people reject Biblical Christianity? And consequently, why do people accept all these other religions and spiritualism that come out of the woodwork? Well to be blunt, Christianity is hard, and people want the easy way out. Christ was even blunter when he said, “For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it.” Huh J.C.? Watcha you talkin about Willis? I mean J.C. was always blunt about the price to pay but then he goes on to tell us that we have no ability to save ourselves and the only way to Him is through Him. Whaa? We don’t like that notion as humans. We like our stock portfolios, our security deposits, and our 401k’s that we built ourselves in order to secure our future. We want to be able to work towards our rewards so we can look back and say I deserved this reward. We don’t want someone telling us there ain’t anything we can do to further ourselves from the cliffs of hellish perdition. Well duh Keith, no wonder so many people reject Biblical Christianity; the price to pay is too much for many. And no wonder people grab on to so many other religions and ideals; because their doctrines (at least the fuzzy ones they tell the laypeople. They like to keep their deep, dark secret ones locked up in the closest) are easy and understandable to the human mind. No person in their nefariously right mind would claim their god was three in one, that doesn’t make sense dude. Despite the fact some major Biblical doctrine that is paradoxical (not contradictory mind you) and demanding to us humans only displays its transcendental, yet loving origin, people still feel the need to latch onto what makes them feel good instead of what is truth and makes them feel peaceful. C.S. Lewis hit the nail on the head. Christianity is hard and it surely can’t compete with the simplicity and accessibility of other faiths, but when you do have facts to bother about with, emotion, feelings, and human creativity take a backseat...fortunately. Now I understand what the rich young ruler was thinking when he “went away sad”. Heck, now I know what I was thinking when I was fighting letting Jesus drive my car. July 22, 2003 Play the Keith’s Virginia Tech True/False Trivia Challenge! --Decide whether the events below were actual events that happened to me, or were just a figment of my imagination. Answers to come in a later edition. So without further ado....True or False? 1. I was changing in the bathroom of my “all guys” dorm after taking a shower in the morning only to see a female exit one of the showers next to me, on more than one occasion. 2. I once slept under a pool table in a frat house at Clemson University on a Saturday night . 3. I once ate 14 hot dogs in one sitting at the main cafeteria on campus (we will not describe events afterwards). 4. I won four arcade machines in high score contests held at the student union recreation hall. 5. After breaking up a fight between two drunk friends one night, I was cut on my hip by a broken bottle requiring 12 stitches and my one and only trip to the local hospital. 6. After driving away about a hundred feet from me, then backing up, a girl from Radford University, whom was looking for parties with her friends, gave me her number after me only saying to her that I didn’t know where any parties were going on that night and that I think college parties suck. 7. My last soccer game as a member of the VT men’s soccer team was against James Madison University. 8. I had the same study hall time as Michael Vick (ex-collegiate football superstar and current NFL superstar) twice a week one semester at school. 9. I once went on a date with a girl named Brittney that represented Tennessee in the Miss Teen USA pageant when she was 17. 10. I won a guest judging spot for the Hawaiian Tropic Girls College Tour bikini contest when it came to Virginia Tech. Ironically it was the same weekend as a soccer tournament. I’m sure you can assume which I chose. 11. I auditioned for the Men of Virginia Tech calendar photo shoot. Despite being called back, I did not make the final cut :( 12. I once drove to the Grand Canyon and back with two friends in a span of two days just for the fun and adventure of it. 13. I officially attended only one party during my tenure at VT. 15. I sold my two tickets that I won in a school lottery, to the National Championship game at the Sugar Bowl between Florida State and Virginia Tech in 1999, on Ebay for $225 each. 16. I had a full size arcade machine in my dorm room (beat that Absolut Vodka!). 17. The only thing that held me back from making a serious run at becoming the new punter for the Virginia Tech football team was my grade point average. 18. My friend Thomas and I made it to the finals, but lost, in the campus-wide 2-on-2 beach volleyball tournament held Spring 2001. 19. On a trip back to Tech from Charlotte, NC, my car hydroplaned at 70 mph during a storm, did three 360°s, and ended up in the median, unscathed. 20. I graduated with honors from Virginia Polytechnic Institute and State University. July 22, 2003 Pirates short review --I saw Pirates of the Caribbean over the weekend and I must say I was quite pleased. It was all the swashbuckling adventure I’d hope it would be. The shining star was of course Johnny Depp as Captain Jack Sparrow. His eclectic acting was so magical (Disney pun intended), that it was a pleasure just to watch him do his thing onscreen. Orlando Bloom (Legolas) played his part well. Unfortunately he was a little too “tight and proper” in his role, but I he loosed up a bit towards the end which was welcome. Kiera Knightly played Elizabeth very well. Not only was she beautiful throughout (i wonder what she looks like in the morning though), her commanding presence as a young actress around a male dominated movie was admirable. Geoffrey Rush played the evil pirate pretty good. He was a little too immobile I’d say though. I think a younger actor to play his part, one with more nefarious energy and physical ability, would’ve been more appealing. The only acting part I was slightly disappointed with were the semi-supporting roles. I just felt that the non main characters were as forgettable as Men in Black II. The father/governor was just a generic old guy (i never liked that guy anyways, ever since seeing Ronin). The “stuck up” boyfriend character that the main girl character was betrothed too but didn’t really love (ala cookie-cutter love triangle) was a little to plastic and not even mean and stuck up enough if you ask me. The comic relief characters were fairly forgettable also. Aside from a forgettable supporting cast, some cookie-cutter plotlines and jokes, the movie definitely exuberated pirating very nicely. Lots of gold, lots of adventure, high seas, big boats, cannons, and women in tight clothing is what makes a pirate flick tick. It’s rumored that Disney is already working on a sequel. I’ll probably see it, but only if Captain Jack Sparrow is at the helm. July 22, 2003 Incompleteness --You may not know this but lots of random thoughts never actually make it to the Random Thoughts page. I’d say for ever random thought that does get published on EbbWorld, there’s about five that don’t. You don’t want to know how many articles, thoughts, etc. that I start writing but never finish. Whether it be lack of motivation, motivation lost, or I just get sidetracked, there a tons of random thoughts that only inhabit my upper room and are lost to liturgical oblivion. It’s funny too sometimes when I go back and read some of these files that I started. I’ll start reading them and have no clue what I was thinking when I originally wrote them; kind of like when you go back and read your old journals or diaries and start laughing at your past mentalities, usually immaturities. Anyways, maybe one day I’ll continue all those lost thoughts. July 18, 2003 Coincedence? --Just as I referring to Looney Tunes cartoons in past iterations of thought, Warner Bros. recently announced the future release of the Looney Tunes Golden Collection, packed with 56 restored, remastered, uncut shorts. You can be certain I will buy that set because I love to laugh and old skool comedy like that usually makes me laugh a lot. I need to venture to my local Best Buy and pickup Cowboy Be-Bop: the Movie. The great anime series makes its way to the silver screen, neato-bandito. Read a review from IGN.com here. July 16, 2003 Blockbuster --You ever notice how when you go into the video store looking for a movie to rent, you either come up empty handed or you get a movie that don’t have much desire to see, and all this after about 48 minutes or perusing the isles? It seems when we’re presented with so many different choices in life, such as a video rental store, we get sensory overload and end up not being able to choice anything at all. I’ve noticed also when I go into a Blockbuster knowing exactly what I want to rent, that I spend too much time in the store anyways. Even though I have the exact movie I wanted to get in my hand, I still walk around the isles looking at other movies even though I know darn well I’m not gonna rent anything else. Go figure. The worst is when you go into a Blockbuster knowing exactly what movie you want to rent and when you get to it, all the copies have been checked out. That’s like a steak to the heart. It’s so frustrating knowing someone else it enjoying the movie you wanted to enjoy that very night. You’re forced to walk around like an idiot for another 48 minutes eventually coming up with nothing or something you have no real desire to see. Talk about flustering. Either video stores are unconsciously nefarious or we’re all just a bunch of indecisive wusses. July 16, 2003 Shake Ya Tail Feather --You might be wondering about the polar opposite type title I have here compared to my other recent topics. Well I must admit, this Bad Boyz II soundtrack song, performed by Nelly, Murphy Lee, and P. Diddy, was not very attractive to me till I heard two very intrepid lyrics. See if you can spot the great song writing capabilities in these artists from the Verse 3 example below. [Verse 3: Murphy Lee + (Nelly)] Yo, I'm the big booty type I like them thick with their mind right (Awe) Banging personality conversate when the time right (Naw) I'm not hard I've got women to handle that They be like he the man when I'm really a Thundercat Come on you know the tics connect like Voltron Collect so much grass popo thinking we mow lawns My gohans don't match that But it matches her head wrap and the seats that I got in the lap I'm just a juvenile (Wha) Because I be about G's Keep your women wizzy man they say they have my babies I'm young like Tucker like the cash and the money (I'm going to eat my money) Man, I'm that damn hungry See I'm starving like Marvin girl I've got sixteen bars of fire is what I'm starting Plus my rats come in packs like Sammy and Dean Martin And I got so many keys you'd think I was valet parking July 16, 2003 Enough already --My writings of late have been of the more serious and spiritual nature. Sometimes it gets me down, sometimes it gets me up. Just read Psalms if you wanna know how that goes. Anyways, I’m gonna take a break from writing about stuff I’ve been writing about recently. Sometimes I don’t mind it because it encourages me that my life has purpose and that we matter, but sometimes it can get overwhelming. I need a respite of sorts every once in a while from the battles that takes place where no human eye can see. On a side note, I haven’t seen Pirates of the Caribbean yet, so I’m a little bummed about that. I’m hoping my Gamespot E3 2003 DVD comes in the mail today. I desire very much to watch it. July 16, 2003 Drive, He Said On a desert road that steamed the sky With the windows up and the air on high I was off the stage, I was on the mend With a solo drive to a holiday weekend My thirsty car came to a stop at the Reptile Gardens Curio Shop When a wind came hissing through the vents, And I felt my sneakers growing tense My forehead broke in a cold, cold sweat-- In the rearview mirror was a silhouette Then I heard the doorlocks take a dive And a whisper screamed "Don't turn around, just drive" Scratch! Dressed in red--pointy tail and horn-rimmed head And a widow's peak like Eddie Munster I sat frozen in my seat--"We haven't had the chance to meet... Are you a singing telegram or something?" He just flashed a hellish smile--"Let's go driving for a while" He held something in his hand I'd never seen before It was my Chevrolet's pink slip Scratch! Evil eye "Step on it, boy, if you want to stay alive" he said "Don't look surprised, you know what I want I've lived for years inside your trunk, so drive" he said "Let's get talking business, son--you ain't fooling anyone I know just what you want to be--now it's time to work for me, so drive" If this is a nasty dream I'd prefer to wake up here I believe the point is clear... Scratch! Out of my car! He said "Ha! I've come too far... Besides, I kinda like the velour seatcovers" God, help me! What do I do? "Shut up boy, it's too late for you...now drive! All you phonies get it wrong--double lives take half us long Should have kept your windows clean--now I'm part of this machine You've got a good 80,000 miles left Before the recall..." If this is a nasty dream I believe the point's quite clear I'd prefer to wake up here I started humming Amazing Grace He said "Come on, boy, give me a break" So I hit the brakes with both my feet And sent two horns through the bucket seat Then the locks shut up as the grace came down I said "Here's the keys--I'll be walking back to town..." -song written by Steve Taylor, circa 1985....download it or ask me for it July 16, 2003 More observations of Satan -I’m realizing Satan’s key method of misdirection is deflection. I mean what better way to pull people into Hell than to deflect their interests away from the only thing that can save them from Hell (Jesus Christ that is). His sole motive is to cut that direct connection to God by placing barriers between it (money, sex, power, religion, pride, etc.). Originally all these barriers were caused by the Fall of Adam and Eve; later perfected by us damnable humans by our sin (I’ve yet to meet anyone that hasn’t sinned. If that’s the case, how could anyone possibly have the audacity to suggest they can get to Heaven, consequently avoiding Hell, through means other than the blood of Christ? Mind boggling I tell you. Makes no common sense whatsoever if you take a hard look at it and are honest with yourself). Before they sinned we had perfect fellowship with Christ, after....well we all know the result of what happened after...just take a look at the front page of any newspaper and you’ll see the state of our fallen world after. It doesn’t take a nuclear physicist to conclude that we’ve been going downhill ever since. Anyways, it only makes common sense, Satan’s methods that is. I mean only an idiot would come in a red devil suit with horns and pitchfork, that’s so obviously nefarious. We’re not that stupid. But we are gullible enough to believe a pretty looking guy giving a pretty sounding message (see random thought below). Nope, the real smart ones come as a wolf in sheep’s clothing. His subtle, non-threatening ways to deflect people’s relationship away from only Christ have worked wonders in the world. Damn him and his f*$*#’n minions... July 15, 2003 Sheep, Dog ‘n Wolf --That old Looney Tunes cartoon comes to my head when I think of Satan. The smartest wolf doesn’t come as himself, but as a sheep, non-threatening to the eye and warming to the heart. It’s how a lot of bad things pervade our society. You don’t see Winston cigarette ads portraying decrepit patients dying in a hospital bed of lung cancer. Nope, you see 20-something chiquitas prancing about some lively scene. You don’t see Budweiser commercials showing beer belly fat men beating their kids with a Bud in their hand. Nope, you see 20-something chiquitas prancing about some lively scene. And when that kid offers you a joint behind the playground, he forgets to mention the scene of you in a dark alley sometime down the road, prepping a needle with the heroin you just bought with the money you got from selling your 2 year old daughter to some guy interested in kinky sex. Nope, Satan is a smart scammer. He’s kind of like that salesman that promises “The Evapo-Clean 9000 will take any stain out of any piece of cloth!” Are you telling the truth mister scam artist, a-hem, I mean salesman? Of course I’m telling you the truth, would I lie to you, my valued customer? After he’s doped you of your hard earned $49.99 because you didn't test his jive, Susie’s meatball stain just won’t come out after dinner. He’s like that politician that comes to your door promising great things for you and your family. And how could his promises be false? I mean he’s got that really nice suit on, the well-groomed hair, and that demeanor just says “honesty”. Come election day, he’s all smiles, you’re all smiles, life couldn’t be better. Come tax return day, that $200 tax return check you were promised by that politician, the very same check you were going to pay this month’s bills with, turns out to be a $392.92 bill. Nope, Satan is one clever cookie. In fact, I’d say he’s the second smartest “being” that exists, from an intellectual standpoint. Well then Keith, how could such a smart being be considered bad? “He (Satan) was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.” -Jesus Christ, John 8:44 Pretty harsh words from a guy that wouldn’t hurt a fly. Well my main man and best bro seems to agree with me. And why not, he created him, I’m sure he knows Satan’s propensity just like he knows our natural human inhibitions to please ourselves. In fact, Satan is worse than spam e-mailers and late night infomercials, he never tells the truth. Whereas Johnny Gottadealforyou sticks in some truth here and there to buy his product, Satan always tells a lie. Granite, gotta hand it to him, they’re good, well-thought out lies, but lies nonetheless. But just like they always say for the true and false section of the test, “If one part of the statement is false, the whole the whole thing is.” Ok Keith, you’ve made your point, Satan is one nefarious mo-foe looking only to kill, steal, and plunder my soul. So what’s your anti-Satan-spam bill? How can we sift out the wolves from the pack? Glad you asked my friend! If you’ll feast you’re eyes on the OEM (original equipment manufacturer for all you non gearheads) version of this shiny brand new Bible....only $19.99. Hehe, kidding aside, that would be a good purchase to be honest. That’s definitely a good toolbox to test to see if all those spam emails, infomercials, and sales pitches are authentic offers. But that book just reflects a lot of common sense ya know. I mean when a salesman offers you a seemingly great and shiny product, don’t just accept it without first examining it, test-driving it, researching it, and discerning its source. Only a fool would buy without testing. You have no idea if that great and shiny product could be the evil Most Fabulous Object in the Universe (props to a great movie called Time Bandits). Point is, you have no idea with just a surface analysis whether that great and shiny object is a Cadbury Cream Egg, or a Photon Gravitizer that will incinerate you if you touch it. So when that salesman comes up to your door with the Super Coathanger Z-200, be careful, be mindful, don't let him manipulate you, don’t let your guard down, and just be cool. You have no idea if that sheep has a long tail and pointy teeth under that costume of white fluffiness. I recommend watchin some of those old Looney Tunes cartoons with the Dog (Jesus-figure), the Wolf (Satan-figure), and the unsuspecting sheep (us-figure). Not only will they get ya to laugh a little, they might teach you a valuable lesson, one that could save your soul. Don’t risk your life on face value, check under the hood before you buy the car. Peace out hommies and little fries. Consider this scenario: You’re a mother of a 2 year old and a 4 year old looking for daycare for the two. You hear of two places locally that fit your price range. You go to each establishment, meet the owners and talk to some of the employees. The facilities are good and the atmosphere seems safe. Fellow parents of kids that attend the centers only have good things to say about them. You’re torn between which place to send your children to; they seem equal. You only want the best and safest place for your kids, as any loving mother would. You then call a local social worker organization to get an un-biased view on each of the daycare centers. The social worker only has good things to say about each of the centers also. Before you’re ready to flip a coin to decide which center to send your children to, the social worker informs you that one of the daycare centers you are interested in employs an ex-convict, convicted of child molestation on 2 accounts and rape on 5 accounts. Because of legal issues, the social worker is not allowed to disclose the convict’s name or the establishment they work for... Solution 1: After hearing this news and considering the great testimonies you’ve heard from employees, owners, and customers of each daycare center, you decide the only way to decide is to flip a coin.... Good idea right? (que the big loud error sound!) Which mother here would send their two children, ages 2 and 4 to a daycare center that could have an employee convicted of child molestation and rape in a court of law?! Let’s correct this mother’s steps. Solution 2: After hearing this news and considering the great testimonies you’ve heard from employees, owners, and customers of each daycare center, you decide the only way to decide is to find out which daycare center employs ex-cons, and to NOT send your children to that center. It may take some time, and it may take some effort, but a loving mother would go through all that for the safety and well-being of her children. If she had based her decision without researching and finding out all the facts about these establishments and their staff, her children could’ve potentially been in real harm’s way. Which mother solution loves her children the most? That’s a rhetorical question if you were wondering... “Test everything. Hold on to the good.” -1 Thessalonians 5:22 "The universe rings true wherever you fairly test it." -C.S. Lewis, Suprised By Joy July 14, 2003 Desire --Have you ever desired something for someone so badly you can’t sleep....can’t eat....can’t think about anything else but that thing? Have you ever wanted to save someone from an impending doom so badly you’d risk walking across a raggedy old bridge over a pit of screaming vipers? Have you ever been willing lay your very life on the line just to prove your authenticity? Have you ever.....been hurt so badly....you can’t sleep....can’t eat......can’t.... “Nothing hurts you like the pain of someone you love, There ain't nothing you can gain that prepares you enough Nothing hurts you like the pain of someone you care about, If I could take it all myself, you know, I sure would, Without a doubt Nothing hurts you like the pain of someone so close to you, I feel so broke inside, but I'll devote my life to lovin' you...” -Spiritualized |