Male abuse is a real problem for men although law enforcement
authorities, other people, even the men themselves do not admit
this exists. Men usually do not report abuse either because they
are not aware of what abuse is or because they are embarrassed.

Men and Physical Abuse by Spouses or Girlfriends.
Many men do not report abuse rather than deal with the
examination of their masculinity.. They choose to "grin
and bear" the abuse unless they are severly injured.

How would you guys like to don a dress and then ride a
donkey backwards down the main street of your town?
Everyone could line the street snickering and making fun
of you.

I doubt if you would even consider it.

Yet, in medieval France, a man who had been physically
abused by his wife was forced to do this so everyone
could see how weak he was.

Male abuse by women? Why not? We accept the "hen-pecked
man." This passive man, abused by his wife, has been the
brunt of jokes and cartoons forever.

Male abuse by women: is it real?

We probably all accept the fact that both men and women
can be the victim of emotional abuse. The "hen-pecked"
man abused by his wife has been the brunt of jokes and
cartoons forever.

Physical abuse is another story. In our society we think
of women as the victims and men as the aggressors in physical
abuse.

But that is not true. Equally as many, if not more, men are
assaulted by their girlfriends or wives as vice versa.

A 1997 survey conducted among dating couples showed almost
30% of women admitting that they had used some form of physical
aggression against their male partners within the dating cycle.
This runs counter to official documentation of female abuse
against men.

Why?

1. Less men report abuse. They are ashamed to report being
abused by women.

2. Health care and law enforcement professionals are more
likely to accept alternative explanations of abuse from a man.
They will believe other reasons for the presence of bruises and
other signs of injury.

3. Our justice system sometimes takes the word of the woman
above the word of the man in abuse cases. It is just more
believable that the aggressor was the man, not the woman.

4. Men will tolerate more pain than women. They are more likely
to "grin and bear it." And again, many are ashamed to seek
medical help for abuse.

5. Unless a woman uses a weapon (and many do), a woman usually
does not have the strength of a man to inflice serious injury
by abuse.

Our society still sees women as nonviolent peacemakers,
the victims of men, perhaps, but not as aggressors against men.
The fact that women are more likely to be severely injured in
domestic violence adds to the problem of recognizing male abuse.

Health care professionals often do not even think of abuse as a
potential explanation. When they see an injury, they accept even
a fairly lame explanation. For example, on seeing a bruised man,
they are quick to accept a work-related accident or "a week-end game
of football with the guys."

Men find it harder to discuss pain then women and even harder to
admit to being a victim. In addition, men often have more hazardous
occupations than women and certainly show more physical aggression
to each other than women show to other women. All of this makes it
easy for the health care professional to accept an injury explanation
other than domestic violence.

Even a mugging might be more acceptable than a female beating. Unless the
report is of a woman wielding an iron skillet or throwing a flower pot, of
course. The so-called humourous side of abuse is more acceptable to a male
ego.

When a man does report domestic violence, he often encounters law
enforcement professionals who are quick to believe his female aggressor
rather than him.

If it seems pretty unbelievable that a single female would stay in
an abusive relationship, why would a single male?