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| high school in Aberdeenshire, Scotland is to be closed soon, due to the recent actions of certain pupils. Last weekend, three of the school's most promising students broke into the headmaster's office, stole some government documents that shouldn't have been there in the first place, and proceeded to smash almost every window in the entire school. This frustrated the headmaster (who's name we cannot print due to legal, illegal, financial and criminal reasons) so much that he ran around the school, shouting gibberish while taking off all his clothes and trying to kill everyone with his bare hands. (D.C Wilson shall be sadly missed.) Here we have a picture taken while the mad head teacher was at it's peak of insanity. |
| Government to Close School "It's too Much" |
| Head Teacher After 5 minutes of Insanity |
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| Due to this unfortunate incident the high school will be closed by the government, as they cannot find a replacement that is willing to teach such a bunch of reckless children. There will be more news on this soon. |
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| :::Words of the Dictionary::: yellow streak > noun a tendancy to cowardice. shat > past tense, past participle of SH*T. shatterproof > adj made to be specially resistant to shattering. bunghole > noun a hole by which a barrel, etc is emptied or filled and into which a BUNG is fitted |
| Did You Know? The human heart creates enough pressure to squirt blood 30ft. You cannot kill yourself by holding your breath. In Texas, it is illegal to put graffiti on someone else's cow. In Cleveland, Ohio it is illegal to catch mice without a hunting license. According to British law passed in 1845, attempting to commit suicide was a capital offence. Offenders could be hanged for trying. 7% of Americans think Elvis is alive. The bible has been translated into Klingon. If you farted continously for 9 years and 6 months, you would have enough energy to build an atomic bomb. A cockroach will live nine days without its head before dying of starvation. In case you were wondering, all of these facts are true. |
| OR NOT |
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| Quote of the Month: "Oi've bin a moof-doiver far many a year, an' Oi've spent all moi money an moof-doiving gear" |
| STOOPID BOLLIX |
| Coprastasophobia: fear of constipation |
| New entries!!--------| \/ |
| Dunno why I even bothered putting that counter in: it's feeble. |
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| FEAR NOT! AS SOON AS I CAN BE BOTHERED ENOUGH TO GET THE FUNNY LOGOS I MADE OFF OF SOMEONE, THEY WILL BE POSTED WITH EXTREME VIGOUR |