Alone
Little Joe sat quietly on the hearth trying to listen to what the doctor was saying, but only able to catch bits and pieces. He knew they were talking about him and that his brother was real worried, but he couldn't understand why. It was his pa that needed worryin' over, not him. Why couldn't they see that? He looked over to the still, silent figure seated in the leather chair. His pa was so sad now and all's he ever did was sit in that chair and stare at the fire. Sometimes Joe would try and talk to him, but his pa never answered; he'd just sit there and look right through Joe like he wasn't there at all.
"Thanks, Doc, I don't know what we'd do without you." Adam smiled a sad little smile as he and the doc walked toward the door.
"Don't hesitate to ask if there's anything you need," the doctor said. "Keep your chin up, son."
Time seemed to stand still for Joe as Adam reached for the door handle. A current of panic rippled through his body causing him to shudder. His chest felt tight, constricted, and the back of his neck seemed both hot and cold at the same time. He stared at his brother, at his brother's hand as it pulled open the door -- and with all his might, Joe willed him to stay.
"I'll stop out
tomorrow to see how you're all doing." Doc Martin patted
Adam on the shoulder. "Don't worry, things will get better." Maybe that
meant his pa would get better, too, thought Joe. Quickly, he chanced
a glance in his father's direction, but to his disappointment found him
unmoved -- and unmoving, still staring vacantly into the fire. Then he
heard the door close and suddenly nothing outside of his body
existed. Only the thundering of his heart, the soft, soothing fabric he held
pressed to his cheek and the warm, familiar thumb in his mouth kept
him tethered to this world.
"Joe?" He
heard a voice calling his name, but he wasn't sure if he was dreaming or not.
He felt strange; his ears were ringing and his thoughts were fuzzy and he
couldn't bear the possibility that he might open his eyes and find himself
alone. "Come on, buddy, it's okay. I'm right here."
It took a moment for Joe to convince himself that the voice was real and then another to gather the courage to open his eyes. Instantly the world came back into focus, everything centering on the dark, earnest face before him. He tossed the blanket aside, needing both arms to cling tightly to the only solid form in this desolate sea. It was okay, for now. Adam was still there.