Short intro from the webmistresses: This story is the product of a tandem writing game we played on The Wayne Brady Message Board. The names of everyone who helped write it are listed above their various contributions. That being said...enjoy!
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Nikki_Lynn A long long time ago, (Ok, fine, a few weeks ago then.) a message board was born where those of us who loved Wayne Brady could fawn and obsess without fear of ridicule from our non-Whoser friends. One day, as Wayne's fans (does anyone else think we need a name here?) were hanging out on the board... |
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Mel (my continuation now!) ...An imposter Wayne showed up! At first no one was sure if it was really him. He kept coming back and trying to trick all of Wayne Brady's *real* fans (I agree...we need a name here!). After a few days Wayne's fans finally realized something was wrong. Something wasn't right. It wasn't until Mel finally noticed something that proved he wasn't the real Wayne Brady. Mel said, "I know you're not Wayne Brady because....." |
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Nikki_Lynn "...the real Wayne would never pour Redi-Whip on Colin's head and make him dance the Macarena, as YOU claim to have done!" So Mel emailed Nikki_Lynn, who was hanging out on the Ryan Stiles board instead of studying for her Biology exam, (Everyone knows WL is much more important than college.) and told her... |
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Holly "Quick! We have to get the girls together to stop this imposter!" Nikki_Lynn didn't know how to respond. "Do you mean like the gang on Scooby Doo?" Mel replied, "No. More stylish, like Charlie's Angels. Hey! Let's call ourselves Wayne's Angels. Or how about the Mistresses?" Nikki_Lynn reminded her to stick to the subject. Soon after, Holly posted a strange message. "They are saying some mean things on the ABC board. One rumour is that Brad and Wayne are looking for a record deal and Chip is trying to sabotauge their plans. And that he's in league with Josie. What can we do?" Then, Linz had a great idea... |
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Nikki_Lynn "We'll dress up as Monkeys and sneak onto the Whose Line set. They'll think we're Brad's relatives come to visit! Then, we'll break into their computers and find out who the imposter is! ('Cause everybody knows that ABC is really just a front for a huge network of spies. They know everyone online.) Are you girls with me?" "Yeah, Ok," said the Wayne fans. (I guess we could call ourselves the Brady Bunch... *g*) So they all put on their Monkey suits, and... |
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Mel Managed to sneak onto the set no prob! And what was even better was that Brad really believed that they were his relatives. Mel took on the role of cousin, Nikki_Lynn was sister, Linz was niece and Holly was aunt. So, the Brady Bunch (we might as well use that for now until we vote officially *g*) wandered around the set for a while. Suddenly they spotted... |
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Holly ...Chip and Josie whispering in a corner. And Laura Hall was with them! The Brady Bunch approached them and Aunt Holly shreiked, "So it is true! You really are plotting against Wayne and Brad!" The conspirators looked at each other confusedly. Laura asked, "What are you talking about? We're planning Wayne's birthday party." "Aha!" shouted Mel. "We know that his birthday isn't coming for a couple of months!" The fury showed on Josie's face as she.... |
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Nikki_Lynn ...whispered harshly, "I know that, but it's gonna be BIG!" The Brady Bunch looked at each other. "I don't believe her," said Linz, "They're up to something! I know it!" The Brady Bunch stalked menacingly up to the two performers, and grabbed them. Mel pulled out a rope that she had conveniently decided to bring, and the Brady Bunch tied them up. "What are we gonna do with them?" said Nikki_Lynn. Just then, the entire studio began to shake... |
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Holly ...Drew was jumping up and down, shouting, "I did it! I did it! I'm Kathy Lee's replacement!!!! Bye! I have to go see Regis." With that, he left. "Now, what are we going to do? Who is going to host now?" The Bunch asked among themselves. "How about me?" a voice came from behind them. They spun around. "It's Clive!" Wayne, Brad, Colin and Ryan screamed together. "He's here to save the day!" "That's right. And I am also the president of Hair Club for TV Celebrities. My first job here is to... |
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Nikki_Lynn "...to warn you guys about these creepy girls that somehow managed to sneak into the studio." Clive turned to the Brady Bunch. "Oh, hello. You must be Brad's family!" The girls looked at each other and grinned. This was going better than they could have hoped...but they still had to find the Wayne Brady imposter, so they... |
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Holly ...snuck down the hallway to where the dressing rooms were. Wayne and Brad's were at the end. "Should we knock?" Linz asked. Mel replied, "Sure. We're family, after all. We have a reason to be here." Nikki_Lynn knocked three times. They heard a faint voice from inside say,"... |
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Nikki_Lynn "...Mmmmmmph! Mmmmmm!!!" Then there was a crash from the other side of the door. The Brady Bunch decided that waiting for an invitation to enter would be a bad idea, so Mel opened the door. What they saw inside horrified them. Brad and Wayne were tied up to back to back, while a third person grinned with an evil look in his eyes. But what really scared the Brady Bunch was that the third person looked just like Wayne! "So you're the Wayne imposter who posted on our board!" said Mel. "Yes," said the imposter. It was all part of my plan to..." |
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Mel ...take over the world!!!" the imposter shouted. They Brady Bunch was starting to become afraid. This man looked almost identical to Wayne, and he also seemed dangerous. "What are you guys doing here?" Brad asked, still believing that the Brady Bunch was his family. All of a sudden Linz, Holly, Nikki_Lynn and Mel tore off their costumes to reveal their real selves! "We're not going to let you get away with this, imposter!!" they shouted as they... |
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Nikki_Lynn ...descended upon the Wayne imposter. Linz and Mel grabbed him and held him down while Holly and Nikki_Lynn untied Brad and Wayne, and then proceeded to use the rope to tie up the imposter. "Hey...You're not my relatives!" said Brad. "Thank goodness you got here when you did," said Wayne, "He was about to..." |
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Mel ...dress Brad and I up in balerina costumes and make us do the show wearing them and singing in opera style. His plan was to make us look like such idiots, that all of our fans would be so disgusted with us they'd never come to our message boards ever again. At which point, he'd start in on his plan to take over the world by.... |
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Holly ...taking over everyone on the show's lives. Even Drew's. Then, as Drew, he would make ABC do his evil bidding. Then, on to Disney. Eisner is no match for him!" "How could you do such a thing?" Linz demanded. "Easy. I am Wayne's twin, Wax. I didn't have the things he had growing up. Now, I take my revenge!" Just then, Mel came up with a brilliant plan... |
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Nikki_Lynn ..."Quick everyone," said Mel, "Let's lock this imposter in the closet! He'll never escape!" So the Brady Bunch quickly locked the imposter in the closet. "Good job," said Wayne, "Who knows what would've happened if you gals hadn't shown up when you did!" "I still don't get it," said Brad, "If you're the Brady Bunch...Where's my family?" Just then, Josie and Chip entered the room... |
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Holly ..."Brad, what happened to your family?"Chip asked. "Never mind," Nikki_Lynn said. "We know what's going on. You're in league with Wax." "Hey, I just got it!" Holly shouted. "Wax and Wayne. Like the moon! That's sick." Wayne shrugged. "Hey, my parents were into astrology. The moon influences the sign of Cancer. What can I say? They're hippies." Nikki_Lynn interrupted, "Holly, let's stick to the point. The jig is up. You're plan for world domination is exposed. What do you have to say for yourselves?" Josie said, "We don't want to take over the world... |
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Mel ...we just want to take over the station." Holly, Nikki_Lynn, Mel and Linz glared at Josie as if she was insane. "What do you mean?" Holly asked her. Josie looked sheepishly away from the group. "Don't you know how hard it is for Brits to get good jobs here in America?" she cried. "It is so hard for me that I decided the only way to make things better was to get Chip and Wax to help me. But somewhere during our plan to take over ABC, Wax got his own idea and turned against us in order to fullfill his plan." The Brady Bunch turned to look at Wax. "Explain yourself Wax." He had an evil look in his eye. "Well, you see... |
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Nikki_Lynn "...I have always been jealous of Wayne. He got all the attention when we were younger!" said Wax, "Just 'cause he was a better singer than me." Wax burst into tears. "I only wanted to feel loved!" he sobbed. The Brady Bunch weren't entirly sure what to make of this new development, so they... |
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Linz Demanded Wax take them back to his place. Defeated, he did so, and when everyone got there they saw a machine in the corner. Wayne and Brad went over to it. Wayne started fidgeting with one of the Buttons, and in a flash of light there stood before one and all, 2 Brads! to which Nikki_Lynn screamed . . . |
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Nikki_Lynn "...Oh my God! There's two of them! Quick, someone get Ryan over there! Now!" After Mel succeeded in calming the overly excited Nikki_Lynn, Wax explained his plan. "I was going to clone myself so that I'd have an army that felt the same as me," said Wax, "Then I would rule the world and everyone would love me, and not him!" He pointed at Wayne. Wayne walked over to his twin and put an arm around him. "I never realized you felt that way," said Wayne, "From now on..." |
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Holly "..." Wayne started singing. "We are family. I've got my brother with me." Everyone joined in. "We are family!.." And they all lived happily ever after. Or did they? |