Get an education online

I've noticed over the past few years that I'm becoming more and more like my father. Out of sheer lack of patience, I usually find myself

flipping through the T.V. channels at 90 mph until I find a cooking, home improvement or animal discovery show. Then I hit the brakes on the remote control like a 15-yr. old pulling out of the garage for the first time. For example, the other day I was whizzing through the channels so fast that the picture was nothing but a blur. All of a sudden, amid the warped and scrambled pictures, I saw what appeared to be a show on the East African Whoopersnizzle. Desperate for mental stimulation, I slammed on the remote control brakes so fast I sent my dog flying off the couch and across the room. To make matters worse, I even find myself listening to talk radio just so I can get involved in a good debate with my car stereo. Now I'm no specialist, but I think these are all signs of learning withdrawal. When I graduated Chiropractic school, I swore that 9 years of post-high school education was enough for me in one lifetime. Lately, my lifetime seems to be getting shorter. To help score a fix towards my need for a cerebral challenge, I've found a couple of mentally stimulating sites.

I mention these first sites, not because of any great tutorials on how to build your own dune buggy using just three toothpicks and some

Bond-O, but because it's a great resource for anyone looking to go to college. One is called The Education Index and it has links to a college search, and financial aid/scholarship page. The college search covers just about any school in the U.S. and gives you several criteria to search by, such as major of study, religious affiliations, student body size, etc. The Financial aid page answers questions about types of financial aid, planning, loans, determining costs, and even has a section that allows you to apply for aid. The other site for checking out scholarships is called FastWeb. They seem to have a more intensive scholarship search. Thinking of going to college? Check out these sites first before you sell your antique lint collection and take out a fourth mortgage on your house.

The next three sites really get down to the meat and potatoes of learning something new. Freeskills has over 200 full online training courses, and it's all free. Another site that has over 7,000 free courses is called Hungry Minds. This site has courses on everything from first aid to HTML. If you're asking yourself, "Garsh, what the heck is HTML?" then maybe you should think about going here before they find it in your drinking water and you grow a third eye. Lastly, check out

SmartPlanet.com. I love these three sites. Every time I go to them I spend half the day deciding what I want to learn next. By the time I

decide, I'm too brain dead to learn anything and the sun is just about coming up over Smiley.

The Librarian's Index to the Internet has links to just about every topic you can think of, including jobs resources, cultures, law, reference desk, religion & philosophy, etc. Hometime is for the Tim Allen in all of us. At this site you can get step-by-step instructions on any kind of home improvement, remodeling, and repair, including how to build your own log cabin.

Need another word for antidisestablishmentarianism, or better yet, a definition? If so, go to Merriam-Webster's Collegiate Thesaurus and Dictionary. How about learning more about that Whoopersnizzle?

Britannica.com is where you'll want to go.

I hope you get the chance to check these sites and do a little learning. After all, if we stop learning, we stop growing. When we stop growing, our minds shrivel up into little blobs of plasma and pretty soon you find yourself working for the government. Besides, who wants to be just

another 45-yr. old guy covered in toothpicks and Bond-O?