The Honorable Judge Frump I Horatio Curmudgeon Frump, beloved Gavelmeister and Mayor of Grimy Gulch, do hereby declare that I am totally miffed at the present state of affairs: Too long has this fair city been scorned by bustling, nearby Hogtown, snubbed by upscale Kinky Springs, and overlooked by Rand McNally...too long burdened with the same old local rabble day after day! Ergo, in the interests of justice, and being in a rare lenient frame of mind,

I DO HEREBY PROCLAIM GRIMY GULCH TO BE IN AN URBAN SPRAWL MODE, AND AUTHORIZE THE ISSUANCE OF TOWN CITIZENSHIP CERTIFICATES TO THE GENERAL PUBLIC! *

*This offer subject, of course, to a sudden or eventual mood-swing

To become an Honorary Citizen of Grimy Gulch...
Email us your First and Last name along with your "nickname".
Your Grimy Gulch citizenship certificate will be sent out immediately.

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