All that happened 5 years ago. And now I'm leaving him again. The reason? I've just found out I've got cancer and I can't let him see me suffer. You're probably wondering what type of cancer it is right?

I've got a brain tumour and there's nothing the doctors can do about it. Sure they can remove it, but that would mean that I would have to spend the rest of my life in a wheelchair, and I can't do that. I'm far too active to spend the rest of my life rotting away.

Our son, Samuel Peter (Sam) is almost five now and he looks just like his father, dark brown hair and gorgeous hazel/green eyes. We were married 6 months after Sam was born and have been happy ever since, until I found out about the cancer.

I have asked Shane's mum, Mae, to look after Sam for a while so he should be fine. Anyway, I had better go, I have a plane to catch; I'm going to go to Australia where I have relatives and will stay with them for a while.

It'll be hard but I have to do it for Shane's sake. I know Shane will try to find me; but I don't care if he does, in fact I might as well end it all now. Goodbye and I'll see you soon,

Caitlin."


"That was an extract from Caitlin's diary, the last part was the last entry she made before taking an overdose of pain killers. I found her lying on the floor as I came in after managing to get on an earlier flight from America to celebrate our 5th wedding anniversary.

As you all know, she was pronounced dead on arrival to Sligo General Hospital. Caitlin, if you're listening now, which I know you are, we all miss you terribly and can't understand why you did what you did, but as you would say, 'Carry on or quit.' I think we'll carry on, but until we meet again, I'll always remember the good times and the bad times we shared together."

Shane, along with Kian, Mark, Bryan, Nicky and all Caitlin's close family and friends as well as Shane's family follow the coffin outside to the cemetery.

"I love you Caitlin and I always will." Shane whispered as the coffin is lowered into the ground.