if I let you go

chapter four

The party was still going on strong and it was already near midnight. Mellie and Kian were sitting on the bench again, looking at the dark, empty backyard. Kian took off his jacket and put it around Mellie's shoulders. "Are you reminiscing about our first kiss?" Kian asked slowly, not taking his eyes off the dark, empty yard. Mellie nodded and smiled, "It's such a sweet memory. I love every single minute of it and it was just the best moment. The best I've ever had."

That day was Mellie's 24th birthday and her family and close friends had thrown her a party. Seven years had passed since Mellie and Kian's first kiss and so many things had changed. Nicky and Georgina had been happily married for almost two years. Their little daughter, Erica, was already a year old. Mark was now engaged to an Italian girl, named Francesca, whom he had met while touring. Shane also had a girlfriend named Claire and they'd been going out for almost two years, while Bryan was still single. He was getting a reputation as the next Robbie Williams of pop, but he kept saying that it was because hadn't found the right person yet. Susan passed away five years ago in a car accident when her car crashed into a big truck. Mellie was devastated and mourned for months, along with Bryan, but they both eventually recovered and continued with their lives.

"There's been so many changes, hasn't there?" Kian said while holding Mellie's hands. She held his hands tight. "So many," she said faintly. They didn't say anything else; they just sat there and looked blankly into the dark empty yard from the bench.

"Mummy!" a little boy screamed while running fast towards her. He ran into her arms and she scopped him up into a hug. "Mummy, mummy .... daddy said that everybody is already inside waiting for you to blow the candles out!" he said in an excited baby voice, "Can I help you blow out the candles, mum? Please, I want to blow out the candles again, please mum. I wanna blow out the candles!!!" He pleaded with her and pulled at her dress. "Of course you can sweetie. We will blow out the candles together, Ok?" She bent over and kissed his forehead, "Now go inside .... come on .... it's cold out here and you're not wearing your coat, come on." She guided him back to the house. The little boy ran fast back into the house with a big grin on his face.

"Nathan has grown fast, hasn't he?" Kian smiled watching him until he was out of sight, "How old is he now?" "He turned two last month." "Kyle is one lucky guy to have a wife like you and a great son like Nathan," Kian said. "And I'm one lucky girl to have a great husband like him and a son like Nathan, I should say," Mellie smiled.

"Mellie, I was so lucky when I had you in my arms. I knew what it was like to have you close to me. I kept seeing your smile and your eyes as you'd look back at me. It was the most brilliant time of my life because everything was just so perfect for me." His hands were getting colder as he spoke, and Mellie tightened her grip. "If I let you go...I would never know what my life could be like, holding you close to me." Mellie smiled bitterly. "If only you didn't go .... you never realised the pain you caused me. Do you have any clue how much I've missed you?" she said faintly, tears dropping from her eyes. Kian's hand was getting colder every minute. "I'm sorry, I never meant to ... I'm sorry ..." His voice faded out.

She stood up. As she was standing there, Bryan walked out the door and came towards her. He looked at her with a sad look on his face. Mellie looked up into his eyes and cried on his shoulder. "He shouldn't have done that, Bryan. He left me ... he left me alone!" She punched him harmlessly, but emotionally, "What good is a ring if he's not here to share it with me?" she cried harder. "He didn't leave you, Mellie. He didn't. He couldn't ... and he wouldn't ever leave you," Bryan said sympathetically, "We've been through this, we've talked it through. It was an accident, an act of God. Susan and Kian didn't survive, and there's nothing we can do about it. It wasn't his fault." He pulled her tighter into his arms and she cried.

"Live your life now. I'm sure Kian will be happy if you are happy," he said, pulling away and kissing her forehead. He turned and walked inside the house. Mellie turned around, looking at the dark empty yard, looking at the empty bench she had just been sitting on, looking at the blue sapphire ring in her left ring finger. She slowly took it off and kissed it, tears streaming down her face. Kian had bought the ring for her just before the accident, but he never had the chance to give it to her. He never came back home, he never lived to place that ring on her finger. She put the ring on the bench. "Will I ever see you smiling back at me?" she whispered faintly.

She turned around and walked inside the house, towards Kyle. He hugged her and kissed her while little Nathan ran fast towards them, reaching for his parents' wide opened arms.

~ End ~

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