BACK		Where You Lead I Will Follow

I sighed as I sifted through some photographs. There was a picture of Mark and I at my 19th birthday party and another one of him putting a headlock on Rowen a year ago at Rowen?s 21st birthday party. I let them drop to the floor when I couldn?t take it anymore. Love wasn?t supposed to be based on waiting, that was what every single one of my friends told me. I always replied, ?It doesn?t have to be like that. I know I trust him completely and that?s all I need.?

Knowing you the way that I do
I only wanna be with you
And I will go??
To the ends of the earth,
?Cause darling, to me, that?s what you?re worth

?God Mattie. They might be right.? I whispered to myself after staring at the pictures that had fallen to the floor. I could still see Mark smiling through the teardrops that had fallen on top of them.

***** Flashback ? Five months ago *****

?You?re leaving again?? I asked Mark in surprise when he came home for a short vacation.
Mark sighed in reply. ?Mats, what else am I supposed to do? It?s my living.? He reached out to touch a loose curl.
I shook my hair away. ?It?s affecting our relationship. I don?t know what the hell I?m doing when we?re so far apart,? I started to say and Mark?s face fell. His blue eyes stood out brilliantly and I could see his lips quivering. ?But I love you more than anything.? I finished.
?Oh Mattie,? Mark whispered and pulled me close to his tall frame and hugged me tightly. ?I wish I never had to put this burden on you.? I felt him kiss my forehead and pull away from me. ?I love you too.? He said breathlessly in a broken voice.

Where you lead
I will follow
Anywhere that you tell me to
If you need, if you need me to be with you
I will follow
Where you lead

?I know Mark, I know.? I whispered back and kissed him tenderly on his full lips. I let him wrap his arms around me as we sat in silence on the couch in my condo.

***** Present day *****

I smiled to myself as I thought back to the day when Mark was so honest and yet so fragile. He wasn?t an emotional person, and neither was I. What we said to each other would forever remain in our memories.
I bent down to the wooden floor and carefully plucked the pictures away from the hardness of it. It was all I could possibly have left of Mark, for I hadn?t seen him in five whole months. When Mark left to go on another promotion tour, I made a vow to myself that I would never let anything come between us and he promised to always be there for me.
?Funny how life turns out,? I thought bitterly and stuck the pictures on my mirror above my dresser. ?You fall in love with someone and you still can?t let him go.?

If you?re out on the road
Feelin? lonely and so cold
All you have to do is call my name
And I?ll be there on the next train

The phone rang as soon as I let go of the pictures on the mirror. To my surprise, I calmed down and picked up the phone. ?Hello?? I said quietly.
?Mats.? A soothing Irish accent rang out in my ears.
My heart melted as soon as I realized it was Mark. ?Mark? Oh God. I was just thinking about you right now.?
I heard Mark chuckle on the other line. ?Me too Mattie. I was just looking through some pictures you had given me a few months back ? the ones from your birthday party.?
I gasped the moment Mark finished his sentence. It was all I needed to hear. He still thought of me the same way I thought of him.

Where you lead
I will follow
Anywhere that you tell me to
If you need, if you need me to be with you
I will follow
Where you lead

?I miss you baby.? Mark whispered after a few minutes of silence.
My eyes started to well up. ?I miss you too Mark. I?m still there with you, you know??
I heard Mark sniffle a teeny bit. ?I know. I?m coming home this weekend and I will do anything to make sure that nothing will prevent me from coming home.?

And I always wanted a real home
With flowers on the window sill
But if you wanna live in New York City,
Then honey, you know I will

?You don?t know how this makes me feel Mark.? I spoke into the phone as I wiped my eyes. I was so happy to hear what Mark was saying.
?I know Mattie. I love you.? He spoke clearly.
My hands trembled when he spoke the three words to me. I was glad that I made the decision to stay with Mark, despite the distance issues and the time problems. He was truly the only man I ever loved.

Where you lead
I will follow
Anywhere that you tell me to
If you need, if you need me to be with you
I will follow
Where you lead

?Oh honey.? I sighed and slowly sat down on my bed, listening to every breath that Mark was making and I bit my lips. ?You know I?ll always be by your side, no matter what.?
?Thanks.? Mark replied and I could hear him fidgeting with the telephone cord.
I giggled a little bit after my eyes dried. ?You?re becoming a hapless sap Mark.?
Mark chuckled. ?That?s between you and me Mats.?

Where you lead
I will follow
Anywhere that you tell me to
If you need, if you need me to be with you
I will follow
Where you lead

?I gotta go baby. We have some things to do, but I?ll see you this weekend.?
Mark said in a sexy voice.
I smiled and glanced up at the picture of us on the mirror. ?Yeah Mark. I?ll see you soon.? I whispered and hung up the phone, but not taking my eyes off Mark?s beautiful blue eyes. ?You never have to wait for love. It?s already come.? I said to myself, remembering the promise I made long ago.

Oh baby, ohh, I?m gonna follow where you lead
I?m gonna follow where you lead
I?m gonna follow where you lead
I?m gonna follow where you lead
I?m gonna follow where you lead??

~ Lyrics ~ Where You Lead, I Will Follow ~ Carole King & Louise Goffin in the ?Gilmore Girls? soundtrack