INDEPENDANCE TURD!!!!
		This...is the legend! On the 27th October 2003 at approximately 7:17pm Lee Craggs entered the bathroom of House Thirteen Zero claiming he was going to "take a sh*t". After leaving the bathroom at approximately 8:32pm, Marc Fretwell heard nature call.  "Oh dear" claimed Marc to himself, "Lee doesn't appear to have flushed the lavatory" and took it upon himself to carry out the task.... FLUUUUUUUUSHHHHH!!!!!! "There we g..." Marc stops himself as he sees that the enormous turd is still there, in full force. "Jesus Christ Craggsy, we've got a floater!" he shouts. In a moment of sheer pride, Lee rushes for his camera to capture the moment. After all the comotion dies down, Marcus remembers he still needs the toilet. FLUUUUUUUUSHHHHH!!!!!! But wait...it's STILL there! After two flushes the amazing floater will not be budged. It doesn't even look affected by its ordeal. The guys observe it and realise that this is no normal turd as it seems to resemble a samosa. Jamie, sitting downstairs, has now been informed but it slightly sceptical about the whole story. "Look" he says.... FLUUUUUUUUSHHHHH!!!!!! "Oh my god!!" he claims as this third flush also fails. Lee is jumping around with glee and pride and Marc is with amazement as he's never witnessed such an awe inspiring sight in all his life. However...all is not well...Traces of the film Independance Day are beginning to show. After the initial excitement of the appearance of this alien lifeform, it is beginning to seem like the whole human race is at risk by it.  Action must be taken. "Let's nuke the bastard" FFFFFFFFFFFFFLLLLLLLLLLLLUUUUUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSS SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The guys jump around with joy as initially it looks as they have saved the world. But...confirmation is required. "Can we get confirmation that the target was destroyed?" asks Jamie as the mist clears. Nothing in sight. Job done. More celebrations. However, Lee who has been watchin closely spots something coming out of the mist....its the turd...."Negative" he replies in a shaky voice, "target remains. I repeat, target remains". The only option is to make piece with the turd and hope that it does not actually become hostile.... SSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! Lee cautiously approaches the toilet to make piece...but cleverly tricks the turd as its guard is down and uses the full force of military action to dispose of it...he pokes it with a stick! And... FLUUUUUUUUSHHHHH!!!!!! The house rejoices as they have brought the bastard down! The Human race lives on!