| Title: Do You Still Love Me? Rating: **R to NC-17** Summery: Angel left with the Judge's arm in the eppy Surprise. He comes back in the middle of season 6 (before the Spike and Buffy bullshit!) to find everything is different. AN: I don't this has been done countless times in the past, but I just couldn't pass up the chance to write my own version. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Buffy tossed and turned in her sleep. "Angel..." she murmured, her forehead and upper lip sheened with a light sweat. Then she snapped awake and sat up in alarm. Why was she dreaming of him after so long? He had been gone for 4 years. She looked over at her window and gasped, thinking she saw him standing there, but when she blinked the image was gone. "He's not coming back, Buffy, get a grip." she told herself sternly. She could still feel his lips and hands on her skin, the dream was so vivid, it was like he was actually there. But he was gone, she accepted it when she started her first year of college. He was never coming back. She felt her eyes brim with tears. "This is ridiculous." she scolded herself, then looked at her clock, an hour before she had to get up and get to work. It was humiliating, but she worked at the Double Meat Palace. At least it got the bills paid and fed Dawn. After laying in bed for twenty minutes, trying her damndest to get the sleep, she sighed and got up. She stepped into the shower and her mind wandered back to her dream. The dream was actually about Angel coming back with a bouquet of red roses, begging her to take him back. She had, of course, and they went up to her room and so on, you get the idea. She got out of the shower and finishing getting ready, putting in her idiotic work uniform, then went downstairs. She toasted herself and bagel and put cream cheese a generous helping of cream cheese on it. Then she sat at the kitchen island and ate in silence. Her thoughts still on her dream, she just couldn't forget about it. There was something in the air that told her to not just brush it off. There was nothing on tv, or on the radio, so she cleaned up after eating and left a note for Dawn saying that she left for work early. She walked down the dimly lit sidewalk on her way to work. She took the long way to kill time. Ever since Angel left, things had started to go downhill. She tried to have relationships, but the men she went out with wanted her to give them everything, but she was never able to do that. She couldn't let them ever touch her. She was a 20 year old virgin, 0.1% of the population make it to 20years without having sex. But she just couldn't let just any guy take her innocence. She wanted someone she loved to be her first. Because they always say that you never forget your first time, and she really wanted her first time to be something she would be happy to remember. She didn't want it to be cheap. Before she knew it she was in front of the Double Meat Palace. The Manager had already opened the restaurant and was bustling around inside, checking the tills. Buffy opened the door. "Hey, Meg." she greeted her boss. "Buffy? Why are you here so early?" the older woman asked. Buffy shrugged. "Couldn't sleep. I thought I might be able to give you a hand." she offered. "Sure. Can you sweep the floor over by the booths over there, and wash the tables as well." she said it as polite order, not a request. Buffy nodded and carried out her orders. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- It was 2 am when the cargo ship docked. The crew members lumbered around on deck, following their orders to swab the deck and clean the bathrooms before they went ashore. Down the in the storage area Angel was woken up by the sounds of the ship docking. He sat up on the small, by functionable, matress that the crew had lent him for the trip. He was so heartbroken when he was held up for four years in Asia. The only cargo ship had sunk and he had no way of getting back to Sunnydale. But now he was here. He stood up and climbed the ladder to the trap door. He opened it and climbed onto the deck, nearly getting run over by a busy deckhand. He thanked the captain then went ashore. It was weird having his feet on dry land after a 2 week trip. Everything looked the same at the docks, but as he walked through the streets he noticed big changes. One of the major ones was, the high school. It was rubble. He felt fear stir in his gut. What is Buffy had been in there when that happened? He went back to his apartment. He unlocked the door and stepped in the familiar space. There was a thick layer of dust covering everything, but not five years worth. He concluded that Buffy must have kept it clean while he was gone. He felt guilt surge up inside him. What would he say to her? How could he expect her to take him back? Did she still love him as much as she used to? He decided to wait until morning. There was a sorceress that had placed a blessing on his soul. It had caused the demon to fade somewhat. He was able to walk in the daylight and could touch crosses and holywater without getting burned. He wasn't sure about the children thing, but he figured he was still unable to have them. He was still a vampire and was immortal, and needed blood to live. But it was a better situation then when he left. Much better. It was 10:30 am when Angel finished cleaning his apartment. It was free of dust now and he changed his sheets. He took a long shower and got dressed. He was really nervous, but he couldn't hold off seeing her any longer. Even if she didn't forgive him for leaving her here for so long, and even if she had a new boyfriend and was happy. He just had to lay his eyes on her again. He left his apartment and walked towards her house. When he got there he stood on the front step, suddenly loosing his nerve. Then remembering how badly he wanted to see her, he lifted his hand to knock. But before he could the door flew open the on the other side was, Dawn. "Angel!?" she squeaked loudly, then threw herself into his arms. She had always thought of him as the big brother she never had. "Hey, Dawnie. You've gotten so tall." he complimented. Dawn let him go and waved him inside. "Come in. Willow will be so happy to see you." she exclaimed, grabbing his hand and dragging him into the kitchen. Willow sat at the island sipping juice. "Willow, look who's back!" she said excitedly. Willow turned, her eyes going wide as saucers. "Angel!?" then she ran and hugged him tightly. "Where were you? You were gone for four years." she said. Angel noticed that Willow was so much older and her hair was short and she didn't dress in bright pastel colors anymore, but still the same old Willow. He also noticed that Dawn didn't say anything about Buffy being home. "I got stuck in Spain. The ship I was gonna catch sunk. So I was stranded." The red head moved out of the hug. "Why didn't you call. We really missed you." she said. "The people in Spain aren't really nice to vampires and I had no money with me. I wrote so many letters, but when I sent them, they got sent back to me." he explained. "Wow." then she looked out the window at the bright sunshine. "Wait a sec. How did you get here?" she asked. Dawn realized at the same time that Willow did. "It's daylight." she stated the obvious. Angel nodded with a slight smirk on his face. "How is that possible?" "I saved a sorceress from a werewolf, so she blessed me. I'm pretty much human, except for a few things." he told them. Willow nodded her understanding. Then she got really serious. "I gather you haven't seen Buffy yet." she said. Angel felt such relief, she was still alive, thank God. "That's what I came here for." he told her. "Is she around?" he asked, attempting and failing at casual. "She's at work." the ex-wicca told him. Angel gave her a weird look. "She works at the Double Meat Palace. Oh my God, Angel, everything is different now. Joyce is dead, and so is Jenny. Spike killed her, and now he's in love with Buffy." Fear gripped his silent heart, "Does she love him?" he asked. Dawn laughed and shook her head furiously. Willow gave her a stern look so the teen stopped laughing. "No, Buffy doesn't love him." then she got serious again. "She tried to kill herself after Joyce died of a brain tumor. Xander found her in time, and he died last year too." Angel's listened closely as Willow explained everything that had happened, the short version of course, and felt an even more powerful urge to see her. "Where's this Double Meat Palace?" he asked assertively. "It's just off of Vasser St." she told him. He nodded and then turned and left. He made great time getting to the fast food building. He nearly ripped the door off it's hinges when he opened it. He when to a closed till. "Excuse me." he called to one of the clerks. The skinny teenage boy walked up to him. "Yeah. I mean, can I help you sir?" the boy asked. "Can I speak to Buffy Summers?" he asked. He knew that she would probably kick his ass out of door, but he just needed to apologize, then he would leave. "Sure. Hang on a minute." he told Angel then moved into the back where the grills were. Angel couldn't see what was going on, but after a while the boy came back out and said, "She's got a few orders to fill, but she switching to the till in after she finishes the orders. If you would care to wait. Shouldn't be too long." he boy told him. Angel nodded and stood there while the boy tended to the costumers in the line. Then he checked his watch and went around to the back again. Then she came out. If he had breath it could have been taken away. She had grown into her body so beautifully, she was a lot thinner, but she still had that aura that made him want to worship her into oblivion. Her lovely hazel eyes she downcast when she stepped up to the till. "Can I help..." she looked up and froze, this had to be a dream, he was here, right in front of her, "...you." she finished. After five years he hadn't changed a bit. His face was pretty much the same, but it had a sexy tan to it now. But it was daylight. "W-what...h-h-how..." "Buffy, can I talk to you outside for a minute?" he asked her. He couldn't figure out why she wasn't getting angry at him and beating up on him for staying away for so long. Realizing that her mouth was hanging open she closed it and walked around the counter, following him to the door. He opened it and held it for her, then followed out after her. Buffy was down being incoherent, she wanted answers. She turned to face him, trying to ignore the downlow tingle at the sight of his hard, muscular body in the sunlight. "Explain." she said, the only word that came to mind. Angel curved the impulse to drop to his knees and beg for forgiveness. "I got stranded in Spain." he told her. She nodded and looked down because she couldn't look at him anymore, she didn't want to forgive him and the sight of him made her want to. "For four whole years?" she asked firmly. "Only one cargo ship stops on the west coast of Spain. It sunk in the Atlantic Ocean." he told her. "I wrote to you, but the letters never went through. I stayed with a sorcery camp, they were the only people that accepted me and believed that I had a soul." he explained. Buffy pressed a hand to her forehead, she didn't want him to see that she was crying. "I thought you were dead." she said brokenly. Great going Summers, she thought to herself, know for sure he knows your crying. When he didn't make a sound she looked up at him again. "Is this a dream?" she asked him desperately. Angel took a tentative step toward her, and she closed the distance, sinking into his warm embrace. He knew he had a lot of explaining to do about the whole walking in the sunlight thing. For now he just held her as she cried into his shirt. She kept whispering 'this must be a dream'. He placed a kiss on her crown, "This isn't a dream, Buffy. I came back to you, if you'll have me." he said. Buffy stopped crying almost right away and pulled away enough to look up into his eyes. "I've missed you so much. But I just need a few days to process all this." she told him, then hugged him one more time before stepping away. "I gather your not allergic to sunlight anymore." she said. "A sorceress at the camp blessed me when I saved her life. I can walk in sunlight, touch crosses and holy water too. But I'm still immortal." he said. Buffy nodded. "Do...do you still love me?" she asked. "Did you ever doubt it?" he asked with a his crooked smile. Just then the teenage boy opened the door of the restaraunt. "Yo, Summers. You got a shift to finish here!" he yelled. Angel fought the urge to growl at the boy for talking to his beloved like that. He was surprised when Buffy just took it. There was something different about her. She wasn't the tough a lively girl anymore. Her eyes looked older than they ought to be and tired as well. "Yeah, Rodney. I'll be right in." she told him then to Angel she said, "I get off work at 8 tonight. Can you meet me at my house?" she asked. Angel nodded. Then she looked down and walked past him to go back to work. Angel watched her, someone has taken his Buffy away and put a emotionally drained Buffy in her place. He would do everything he could to get his Buffy back, even if it meant burning down this wretched building. He would save her. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- When Buffy's shift was over she changed back into her street clothes. She had gone through the rest of her shift in some sort of trance. She couldn't believe that after all this time, he was back. Four years of missing him, now he was back in Sunnydale, waiting at her house as she walked home. Now she stood in front of her house. She could see him and Dawn was acting out some weird skit thing for him. She heard him laugh and felt the tingle in her gut intensify and go lower. Angel sat inside on the couch as Dawn did an impression of Mr. Bean. He laughed because he didn't want Dawn to know how much was on his mind. He could feel her coming as soon as she left work. Now he knew she was standing outside. If she wasn't gonna come inside that he would go outside. "Hey, Dawn. I need to go get something from my apartment. I'll come back and you can show me the turkeyhead one, ok?" he told her. "Okay, just hurry, you're gonna die when you see it." she said. Buffy saw him get up and give her little sister a hug. She felt a pang of jealousy, but scolded herself for being ridiculous. Then he moved away from the window and the door opened. She froze in position as he came closer to her. "I don't understand it, Angel." she said once he was standing at a comfortable distance to have a conversation. "If you loved me so much, how come you left in the first place? Do you know how many times I needed you and you weren't here? Like when my mother died, when I was brought back from the dead? When the mayor turned into a big snake at grad? When Xander got turned into a vamp, and I was forced to kill him? Did you know that I had to go stag to Senior Prom?" she practically attacked him. "You know why I left, Buffy. I had to get rid of the arm, and I did. The judge never was brought to life because I did the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life." he told her calmly, that last thing he wanted was this talk to turn into a shouting contest. "I left the one woman that I have ever loved, not knowing if I would ever see her again. You really have no idea how much I love you, do you?" he asked, but it was more of the statement. "I..." she trailed off. Then she tryed again. "I've always known. But..." she trailed off again, unsure of how to word it. Angel stepped closer, invading her personal bubble partially. He heard her heart speed up and her breathing increased. Four years of longing was coming rushing back. "But what?" he proded. Buffy looked up at him with innocence in her eyes. "You wouldn't make love to me before you left." she said. **Flashback** "I love you." he told her, holding her close. "I try not to but I can't stop." Buffy didn't fight the tears and let them spill down her cheeks. "Me too. I can't either." she buried her face in his chest and inhaled his wonderful scent. Then she looked up again. "Angel, make love to me before you go. Please." she almost begged. She felt like an idiot standing in his arms and practically pleading for him to make love to her. Angel was speachless. He was about to say yes, when the crewmen on the boat started to untie the ropes the held the boat to the dock. He kissed her a final time. "I'll be back to take you up on that offer." Then he kissed her forehead and picked up the box and boarded the cargo ship. Unknowingly leaving her behind for four years. **End Flashback** She let him know with her eyes that she hadn't let another man touch her. She hoped he understood why. "So I've always known that you love me, but I've just never been shown." she crossed her arms to block out a chill that traveled up her spine at the memory of that night. His eyes grew dark with lust. "You want me to show you that I love you?" he reached out with his hand and pulled her flush up against him, he delighted in her gasp of surprise and pleasure. "I can do that." he said, then lowered his head to kiss her, giving her plenty of time to refuse, but she met him halfway. When his lips touched hers she let out a tiny whimper. He tasted exactly the same. Sweet and a little bit spicy. And his smell...oh his smell was intoxicating. She moved her arms around his neck and lost herself in the wonderfully familiar sensations and scents. She could drown in the cologue he wore, it was the perfect scent for him and when it was mixed with him own natural scent is created the perfect aphordiesiac. She was lost in him, and god, she missed him so much. Angel deepened the kiss, pulling her closer. He was still aware that Buffy's little sister was probably watching, so he curved the impulse to lower her to the ground and show her just how much he adored her, but that wasn't what he had planned. He broke the kiss and pulled away just enough to looked into her lusty eyes. "You want me to show you how much I love you? Come to my apartment tomorrow night at 8:00." he said cryptically. She smiled and nodded. "Okay. You're on." her whole body was tingling at the knowledge that she was finally going to be with him physically. She could hardly wait. He grinned at her, kissed her passionately one more time, and pulled away. "I'll see you tomorrow night, then." he said hoarsly. The tone of his voice sent shockwaves straight to her nether regions. He kissed her forehead and turned to walk home. Buffy watched him go, obviously going to prepare whatever seduction plan he had cooked up for her. She smiled anxiously before rushing inside to update her best friend on the Angel situation. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- To Be Continued... |
| Part Two Coming Soon |