38. Fantasizing about sex can be good if you do it realistically. That is, you should fantasize about a woman who is available and with whom you might have a chance. Also, you should only think about such fantasies when you can give them your full attention. Half-thoughts and vague wants concerning sex will only break you down, tire you out, and make you look old. They also destroy your ability to think in crucial moments. What's more, fantasies should rarely be thought about while you're speaking with her (though it's OK to think about them while you're fooling around with her).

    When you are alone and your mind is free of other concerns, use your imagination to picture how an encounter might naturally play out. This is the only way a fantasy can lead to an actual event. Imagine the event in real time, including things you might do or say to make it better for her.

    Someone up there is listening. That would be Nelly, the whore-goddess. If you imagine it well, the pleasure of the actual event will be granted. Just try it. You'll see.

39. On the first kiss . . .

    Here we have perhaps the most awkward moment in man-woman relations. Please try to understand that if I were to give you specific guidelines on how to carry this off, these guidelines would always appear cliche. They would always sound dated.

    But understand the nature of the cliche. Things are cliche not in and of themselves. They are cliche because so and so did it. If so and so is a dork, everything he does is cliche and cheesy. If so and so is relaxed and calm, everything he does is cool. Yes, it's as simple as that.

    So my general recommendation to you is to always go for the first kiss as soon as possible. For the awkwardness will only grow as you wait for it to pass.

    Hot women are very sparing with the "windows of opportunity" they afford. And once they open it, you better jump through, or she will punish you by opening it for someone else -- and by never opening it again for you.

40. Never try to initiate physical affection with a massage. This of course is one of the oldest tricks that never works. A massage is quite welcome after sex, but given before it's a weak move, exposing your lack of balls. You're too timid to try anything real, so . . . Hating it. Also, since it's such an old trick, it always comes off sleazy.

41. Remember, you will never be able to assess a woman's thoughts by what she says. The fact that she is talking is all you should care about. If she is talking a lot, you're in good shape. If she's not, you're not.

    In general, a talking woman is more akin to the beautiful song of a bird than to a read-out of a particular thought pattern.

    But there are a few things to remember . . .

    • Never ask "How are you" or "What's wrong?" or "Are you alright?" to get her talking.
    • If you find she is silent for a long period of time, it is better to act foolishly than it is to try interview questions.
    • If you must speak, speak in praise of someone or something, not her though.
    • Listen with playful ears. Encourage her to speak favorably of others by doing so yourself.
    • If she mentions other men, this is a good sign. It means she's trying to impress upon you that she is desired. Do not be distressed about it. If she praises another man, she is only doing so to tell you what she likes in a man. Join in the praise of this fellow if you know him. Remember: it's you she's hanging with.

42. You wig = you lose.

Questions? You can contact me by clicking here or by writing to me at "whoremanual@yahoo.com"

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