SEATTLE, Nov. 30, 1999 --- Militant pacifists attacked anti-WTO protesters in the streets today, acting in concert with violent mobs of black-clad, bomb-throwing police.
    In at least six reported incidents, non-violence advocates attacked people who violated part four of the Non-Violence Code, which forbade protesters from engaging in "property destruction," a euphemism for economic sabotage.  Yet, despite aggressive action against window-breakers and graffiti-writers, $1.5 million worth of damage was done to banks and chain-stores on the first day of protests alone.
    In one incident this reporter witnessed a man attack a masked graffiti-writer with a telescoping metal baton, striking the writer in the back of the head in a brutal and unprovoked assault.
    "Good," commented one peaceful(?) protester witnessing the attack.  "Somebody has to enforce the Non-Violence Code."
    Anarchists in the crowd quickly pulled the pacifist off of his victim and stopped the fight.
    In several similar incidents pacifists defended police interests with their own bodies.  In one case, non-violence advocates linked arms to form a human wall around police cars when protesters tried to deflate the tires.
    "We had to protect those squad cars because police might have needed to go pick up more tear-gas or pepper-spray," explained one self-appointed pacifist spokesman.
    In another incident, militant pacifist, seeing that police were outnumbered by protesters, formed a human wall in front of the Niketown store because people wanted ot break the windows.  Their efforts were noted by grateful authorities.
    "I want to thank all of the pacifist who assisted police and protected windows," said Seattle's Chief of Police Norm Stamper in a press conference the following day.  "If it weren't for them, I would have had to move a whole squad in to protect Nike, right at a time when my boys were desperately needed a few blocks away to help beat and gas unarmed protesters."
    "The pacifists make my job twice as easy," added officer Randolf Berger, who cracked three skulls, broke two ribs on two different people, and kicked another man in the balls.
    Many peace-advocates collaborated directly with the violent police gangs prior to the protests, informing them of action plans and march routes, which allowed the police to better coordinate their attacks on the protesters.  Some peace-thugs further facilitated police violence by convincing protesters to sit down in the streets when police attacked.  This ensured better aim for officers who shot people in the face with plastic bullets.  Others screamed "Non-Violence," attempting to intimidate anyone brave enough to defend themselves from the viscous police assaults.
    "Resistance only causes more repression, not the other way around," explained one pacifist delegate.  "The bad protesters deserve to be captured and punished by the police state.  I hope they all get raped in prison," she said.
    Some people complained that they had never agreed to nor were even consulted on the Non-Violence Code, which was handed down by a secret tribunal in an un-democratic and non-transparent process.
    "Until the police agree to the terms of the Non-Violence Code, it remains meaningless," said one young woman as she smashed an ATM machine with a hammer.