Dear Josh Pace,
I want to personally thank you for completely fucking me over. If it was not for your magnificent personal effort to lose toAlabama I would be in first place in my pool and having a good chance at winning $500. But instead I'm now mathematically elminated from getting first place. Plus, maybe if you hadn't thrown the ball away so much or made a shot Syracuse would be playing for the final four.
Listen Josh, normally I like you alot. I don't care that you don't have a jump shot or look like a paraplegic when trying a free throw. In fact I like the fact that all you can do is the same left handed jump hook in the middle of the lane. I understand why you do it .At one point in my life, when I was under 5 feet I too couldn't hit anything outside of ten feet and when playing all the kids that were bigger I had to throw up awkward shots close to the basket just so they weren't swatted away. I know the feeling of what it is like to play a down low game when you're the lowest to the ground.
But for God's sake, could you have tried harder to lose to Alabama? How could you lose to Alabama? You should have been able to play like crap and still beat them. Instead you played like you had money on Alabama. Could you have thrown one more ball away? Every possession seemed like you were doing something to prevent Syracuse from winning. Also, I'm not one to really critique someone's else basketball skills, but if you're going to play division I basketball please learn to do something with you're weak hand. I would start with dribbling but anything would be good.
Finally, I hope you have a great summer and 'cuse is going to win it all again next year.
See you in the car,
Zach Pike
P.S. Tell Edelin I hope he feels better.