| Reasons Why It's Great To Be A Guy (Besides that wonderful manly physique girls love) |
| ~A 5 day vacation requires only one suitcase ~Bathroom lines are 80% shorter ~We can open all our own jars ~Phone conversations last 30 seconds (yeah right) ~We know useful stuff about tanks and airplanes ~Old friends don't care if we've lost or gained weight ~When surfing channels, we don't have to stop on every shot of someone crying ~Our last name stays put ~We can leave a hotel room bed unmade ~We can kill our own food ~The garage is all ours ~We get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness ~We see the humor in "Terms of Endearment" ~We never have to clean the toilet ~We can be showered and ready in 10 minutes ~If someone forgets to invite us to something, they can still be our friend ~Our underwear costs 6.50 for a pack of 3 ~None of our co-workers have the power to make us cry ~We don't have to shave below our neck ~If w'ere 34 and single, no one notices ~Chocolate is just another snack ~Where and when we pee doesn't effect our emotional well-beind ~We can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger seat ~Flowers & duct tape - we can fix everything ~We never have to worry about other's feelings ~Three pair of shoes are more than enough ~We can say anything and not worry about what people think ~We can whip our shirt off on a hot day ~Car mechanics tell us the truth ~We don't give a flip if someone doesn't notice our new haircut. ~We can watch a game in silence for hours without our buddy thinking "he must be mad at me" ~One mood, all the time ~We can admire Clint Eastwood without having to starve ourselves to look like him ~Same work. More pay. ~Gray hair and wrinkles add character ~Wedding dress: $2000, Tux Rental: 100 bucks ~We don't care if someone is talking behind our back ~We don't pass on the dessert and then mooch off someone else's ~If we retain water, it is in a canteen ~The remote is all ours ~We need not pretend we're "freshening up" to use the bathroom ~We can go to the bathroom alone ~If we don't call our buddy when we said we would, he won't tell our friends I've changed ~The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected ~If something mechanical didn't work, we can bash it with a hammer and throw it across the room ~New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle our feet ~We think the idea of punting that small, ankle biting dog is funny. Really funny. |
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