For_you17

                                            A WORD FOR MOMS

           Motherhood. We praise it. We write poems about it. Once a year we send flowers and cards to honor it. But in this day of day-care centers and professional “care-givers” do we understand how important a mother really is? Moms, no one else can do what you do in the life of your child. No one on earth can influence your kids more than you can. In fact, humanly speaking, there is no greater power on earth to change lives than the power of motherhood. You see, mothering means more than house-keeping. Mothering means more than doing laundry. Mothering means more than cooking and car-pooling. A mother isn’t a person who just changes diapers. A mother is a person who changes destinies.

            Do you want to see how that works? Do you want to see how eternally significant the work of mothering is? Look with me at 2 Timothy 1:5. In this verse Paul talks about the eternal impact one mother had in the life of her daughter. And the, in turn, the influence that daughter had in the life of her own son. Listen as I read 2 Timothy 1:5. To a young pastor named Timothy Paul writes, I have been reminded of your sincere faith, which first lived in your grandmother Lois and in your mother Eunice and I am persuaded, now lives in you also.

            Do you see the impact one mother made? As a mother Lois didn’t just change diapers, she changed destinies. By passing on her faith in God, Lois changed the eternal destiny of her own daughter Eunice. And then, when Eunice became a mother, she passed on the faith she had received from her mother to her son Timothy. And now, in turn, Timothy who grew up to be a pastor and a companion of the apostle Paul was used by God to bring many more people to Jesus Christ. And then, those who Timothy led to Christ in turn shared their faith with still others. And it all started with one mother leading one daughter to faith in Jesus Christ.

            Do you see how it works? Mother’s don’t just change diapers, they change destinies. Any mother who knows Jesus Christ and takes her calling at home seriously has the power to transform every generation that follows her. No job is more important than mothering. There is no higher calling. If you are a woman with children don’t buy into Satan’s propaganda that degrades the value of motherhood. If you are a mother, take your calling seriously.

            But exactly what does God call you to be when He calls you to be a Christian mother? In order to effectively shape the destinies of your children God calls you to be present. Successful mothering requires you to be present in your children’s lives. First, let’s talk about physical presence. Today, many women—maybe most women—work outside the home. For younger children that means day care. For older kids that means coming home to an empty house.

            So what impact does a mother’s physical absence have on her children? Studies show that, in general, young children who spend more than 20 hours a week in day care tend to have lower self-esteem, tend to be more hostile, and tend to have more problems developing intimate relationships with others as they grow older. I tell you that because I want you to understand that your physical presence as a mom is important to your child. But I don’t what you to believe that your physical presence is important just because some secular study says it is. Our final authority is God’s word. So what does the Bible say about moms? Well, there is no verse in the Bible that directly says, “All mothers must stay at home with their children.” However, the Bible does clearly communicate that when a woman becomes a mother, the task of mothering takes priority over any other occupation that lies outside the home. Look with me at Titus 2:3-5. Listen to what Paul says about God’s calling on the life of married women. Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.

            Now there’s a lot in that passage, but today I just want us to see the place where a wife and a mother’s ministry primarily takes place according to God’s plan. Paul says a woman is to be busy at home. The New American Standard translates it to say they are to be “workers at home.” Now when a woman is at home guess what that means? It means she is physically present in the lives of her children. Please understand how important this is. Home is where character is shaped. Home is where saving faith is passed from one generation to the next.

Home is where eternal destinies are shaped. And the one person probably has the most influence in shaping eternal destinies at home is you moms! That’s why it’s so important for you to be there is you possibly can. All the material things we can buy with that extra income are going to burn up some day. Our children are going to live forever. If you’re in a position to make a choice between extra income and your kids is there any question about what choice you ought to make. But you say, I don’t have a choice. I have to work outside the home to make ends meet. That might be true for some here today. It’s not true for most of us. Most of us can choose to have our wives and the mothers of our children home if we are willing to sacrifice to make it happen. The bottom line is this, no mother can shape eternal destinies at home if she’s seldom there.

For those of you who really can’t be at home with your kids, don’t despair. Do what you can do. Pray hard. Trust in God’s grace. He can pull you through. And he can pull your kids through too.

But being present for your kids involves more than being physically there. You must also be emotionally present for them. Moms (and dads), it’s possible for you to be at home physically with your children and still be emotionally distant from them. We all have a limited amount of emotional energy. Sometimes we fail to save some of that energy for our kids.

When we run out of gas emotionally because of all we do outside the home it’s easy for us to forget that our kids are gifts from God. It’s easy for us to begin to treat them as though they are intrusions. Face it, kids have a way of coming to you or calling for you at the most inconvenient times. They’ll come when that novel is really getting good.   They’ll call for you when there’s only 20 seconds left in the ballgame and the score is tied. Or the first time today you finally get a chance to sit down and relax—that’s when they flush the ball down the toilet and create a major flood in the bathroom. Those are the times we really need to be emotionally present for our kids. Those are the times we must remember that our children are blessings and not intrusions.

            But there’s still more. Moms, shaping destinies for God not only means being physically present and emotionally present—it means being spiritually present too. Let me show you what I mean. Look with me at 2 Timothy 3:14. Here Paul is reminding Timothy of the spiritual influence his mother and grandmother had on him. Speaking of Timothy’s faith in Christ Paul writes, But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of, because you know those from whom you learned it…

            Do you hear what Paul says there? Timothy came to know Christ not only because his mom was physically and emotionally present—Timothy’s mom was also spiritually present. Eunice’s life was a spiritual life. Every day, in his mom, Timothy saw a living example of what it looks like to follow Jesus.

            As parents, our primary calling is to pass our faith in Christ on to our children. Well, the only kind of faith we can pass to our kids is living faith. It’s doubtful that God is going to be real to your kids if He’s not real to you. Moms and dads, are you spiritually present in the lives of your children? Do they see that Jesus makes a difference in your life? Do your kids see you pray? Do they hear you talk about Christ? Don’t get me wrong. None of us are perfect Christians. But we do need to be growing Christians.

            Are you growing as a Christian? Here’s some good news. Being a parent is a great way to grow in Christ. Look with me at Galatians 5:22. In Galatians 5:22 Paul defines the fruit of the Holy Spirit. In other words, these are the character traits that ought to be growing in our lives as we raise and interact with our kids. Paul writes, But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

            Moms and dads, think about it. Is there any occupation that gives more opportunity to develop patience than parenting? How about peace? How about kindness? And what can top being a mom or a dad when it comes to opportunities to learn gentleness and self-control? The great thing about being a mom is this—at the very moment God uses you to train your children, God is using your children to train you. As you mother your children you grow in Christ. And the more you grow in Christ, the more you will be spiritually present in the lives of your kids.

            If you are a mom, God calls you to be present in the lives of your children. Be present physically. Be present emotionally. Be present spiritually. But there’s more to a mother’s calling than just being present. If you intend to shape the spiritual destinies of your children you must be intentional. Look again with me at 2 Timothy 3:14-15. I want you to see something about how Timothy’s mom influenced his life for God. Speaking about the influence Eunice and Lois had on Timothy, Paul writes, But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of, because you know those from whom you learned it, and how from infancy you have known the holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus.

            What do you see there? We see that Timothy’s mother systematically taught her son God’s word from the time he was a baby.   You see, Timothy’s mom had a goal. Her goal was to introduce her son to God. Her goal was to lead him to faith in Christ. She knew that the best way to make that happen was to intentionally teach her child God’s truth. The results from a study done last year at Purdue University should not surprise us at all. The study showed that if you want your kids to share your religious beliefs its not enough to model those beliefs. You must tell your kids what you believe. In families where both parents shared the same religious belief and where that belief was carefully explained, children tended to adopt that belief when they grew up. It’s not enough for us to live what we believe in front of our kids. We must intentionally teach them what we believe. Like Eunice, we need to systematically teach our children the word of God.

            What are your hopes for your kids? Do you hope that they’ll trust Christ as their Lord and Savior? If so, what are you intentionally doing introduce them to Jesus? Are you sharing your faith with them? Are you teaching them the Word of God? The movie-makers and TV writers are intentionally promoting their beliefs to our kids. Shouldn’t we be doing the same?

            Moms, biblical parenting means being present. It means being intentional. And finally, biblical parenting means persevering. Galatians 6:9 says, Let us not grow weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.

            Moms, don’t grow weary in what you do. Don’t give up. Seldom does a child say thank you for what you do. Seldom do they recognize the sacrifices you make. Still the benefits of faithful mothering do come. Our children grow up. Down the road they begin to recognize the sacrifices you made for them. And even if they do wander away from God, in the end—because of your influence—they very often come back to Christ. So don’t grow weary. Persevere. Remember, you’re not just changing diapers. You’re changing destinies.

            Moms (and dads), when God entrusts you with children he calls you to be present, to be intentional, and to be persevering in the work you do. One thing He doesn’t call you to do is to be perfect. Moms, when you fail to be the mother you long to be, leave room for grace. If you just can’t be at home like you want to be, leave room for grace. If you lose your temper like you ought not lose it, leave room for grace. If you did the best you knew how to do and your children aren’t following Christ, leave room for grace. Leave room for grace and keep on praying because the final chapter isn’t written. The story hasn’t yet come to an end.

            You’re never going to be a perfect mom. You’re never going to be a perfect dad. The good news is you don’t have to be.   Hebrews 4:15-16 reminds us that, as believers, we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet without sin. Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. And if parenting isn’t a time of need I don’t know what is.

            Moms, you mean so much. In God’s strength you change destinies. Be true to that call. Be present for your children. Be intentional as you point them to Jesus. And don’t give up. And most of all—every day—leave room for grace. Leave room for grace because unless the Lord builds the house, you labor in vain.