(Richard Lewis - Stand-up comic and star of sitcom "Anything but Love" July 1997)
Hear hear Richard! (Annie)
"Really, he called me that? Ellen DeGenerate? I'e been getting that since fourth Grade. I guess I'm happy giving him work."
(1997 Newsweek interview regarding Jerry Falwell's comments)
"Are you sick of me yet? I'm even sick of me. And I'm sitting down there next to Jonathan Taylor Thomas who keeps hitting on me. He has no idea..."
(1997 At Showest)
"I ask people why the have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it is such a beautifull animal. There you go. I think my mother is attractive, but I have photographs of her"
("My Point... And I Do Have One")
"It's so weird all the different names they have for groups of animals. They have pride of lions, school of fish, rack of lamb..."
(Ellen' stand up routine)
"I'm a Godmother. That's a great thing to be, a Godmother. She calls me God for short. That's cute, I taught her that"
("My Point... And I Do Have One")
"To tell you you're a fresh and clever & original, wich was all I ever wanted to be. I don't wanna be just good, I wanna be original. I wanna be myself and so that was amazing to hear from him.
(Ellen on Oprah Winfrey 1995)
"Why do woman have to get up and paint their faces? Who came up with that idea? What's wrong with washing and moisturizing?"
("My Point... And I Do Have One")
"My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today. We don't know where the hell she is."
(Stand-up routine)
"High heels should be outlawed (at the very least there should be a five day waiting period before you can buy them). It should be mandatory that the Surgeon General print a warning label on high heels like they do on a packet of cigarettes (i.e. Warning: These shoes can lead to lower backpain, aching toes and the illusion that you are taller than you actually are)"
("My Point... And I Do Have One")
"We all feel like idiots at one time or another. Even if we feel we're cool 98% of the time, that 2% doofus is poised to take over your body without any warning. It just takes a crack in the sidewalk - one little trip. We feel like fools, turning back to look at it. 'There's a pebble, someone better put up some orange cones to warn others.' Then we look back one more time to show the pebble who's boss, 'Damn pebble, why I oughta..."
("My Point... And I Do Have One")