"Tell me if you feel the same way I do
And tell me that I'm not mistakenly taken with you.
You're all I ever wanted in a man
You see, all I need is everything you are to me
If you could somehow read my mind
You would see what I can't seem to say..."
-Read My Mind by Reba McEntire
Brad awoke to find himself alone in the double bed. Confused, he
called out to his
absent lover, but only heard the empty silence. The man's
clothes, strewn about the
room in their fierce lovemaking, were gone. The only thing
remaining was his lingering
scent in the sheets and a note on the kitchen counter.
-Brad,
I had some of your cold chicken and a
soda, then
had to scram. I'll see you at the MGM Grand when I get
there.
---Chip
Standing with his mouth agape, still clutching the scrawled note
on spiral paper, Brad
felt confused beyond belief. "He didn't want a
relationship." His voice sounded hurt and
crowded with tears in the small kitchen.
He picked up the cordless and sat heavily on the barstool that
was situated by the
breakfast nook. He'd hoped to be watching Chip sitting on that
very spot as he served
up scrambled eggs and sausage with fresh squeezed orange
juice...instead, he was
alone, one hand clutching the note and the other his purple
cordless phone. He didn't
know what to do next. His mind went between a total blank and
unorganized thoughts
of why Chip had abandoned him with a note just saying he'd see
him at the hotel a few
days before the big Super Bowl stage special.
On autopilot, he hit the fourth speed dial and heard the familiar
tune of Ryan and Colin's
phone number.
* * * * *
Chip awoke on the couch in his cramped downtown apartment when he
felt a furry
face pressing against his feet rather demandingly. He vaguely
remembered coming home
and thinking he'd have a beer and watch the rerun of Oprah, then
go to bed.
Obviously he'd never made it to the bed. Some news show was on
and the small
pyramid of Budweiser cans told him bed was never an option.
Squinting his eyes
against the morning light filtering through the windows, he
checked his watch...it was
already ten-thirty.
Groaning as he sat up and rubbed his eyes, Chip felt the first
ache in his back, then
farther down. He remembered the night before and felt his heart
sink. He couldn't
explain why he'd left, or why he'd come home and drank a
six-pack, or why it hurt so
bad to not wake up still comfortably intertwined with Brad.
Standing up and moving to close the drapes, he wondered what Brad
was doing, if he
was surprised that he had left, or was hoping for it. That
getting kicked out of bed first
thing in the morning always hurt...almost as bad as waking up
alone.
Barefoot and stumbling, Chip knocked over his 6 can pyramid and
made his way to
the small kitchen. He opened the fridge and remembered how
comfortable he felt at
Brad's place, just going through the fridge in search of a late
night snack. How
comfortable the soft bathrobe was, wrapped around his body...how
comfortable Brad
felt wrapped around his body.
Shaking loose the haunting thoughts, he retrieved an open can of
cat food and fed his
kitty, then stumbled to the bathroom for a piss. He remembered
the onion breath,
thinking Brad was joking when he was ordered to go brush his
teeth. As he applied his
own bristles, he remembered that the spare toothbrush in Brad's
bathroom had been
purple, and how he'd left it still wet and dangling beside Brad's
hot pink toothbrush.
They'd even looked kinda cozy side by side...the hot pink and
purple together.
"Oh, stop it." Chip yelled at himself as he spat out
the white foam, "Christ, you sound
like you're in *love* with him." He shook his head
violently, then toweled off his wet
face and examined his reflection in the mirror, using a well
trained hand to turn on the
'Hot-n-Foamy'. He looked like hell, red rimmed eyes, the
remainder of pressure
marks from sleeping on the leather couch...all tell tale signs of
his upset.
He heard the phone's shrill shriek from the living room and
almost ran to answer it.
* * * * *
"What do you mean, 'He left'?"
Brad sighed, a noticeable tremble in his voice as he held back a
breakdown. "When I
woke up this morning, he was gone. He left me a stupid note
saying he would see me at
the hotel in a few days and that he ate some of my chicken!"
"Wow." Colin sighed, "That's not right...I thought
for sure he liked you."
"So did I." Brad's voice dropped to a mewling whimper,
"We...we...we made love last
night, and it was...the...most...wonderful..." he broke off
into a trail of hitching breaths,
holding back the sobs as best he could. "I...I think I'm in
love with him!"
"Shh..." Colin soothed, "Just calm down, Brad. He
didn't say anything last night about
having to leave early?"
Brad sniffed and shook his head, "No, nothing."
"Okay, I'm going to ask you a question, and I don't want you
to be upset...okay?"
After sniffing once more, Brad replied, "Okay, shoot."
"Did he enjoy the sex last night?"
"What?" Brad raised his voice, "What do you mean
by that?"
"Remember, he wasn't even sure he was queer." Colin's
voice was soft and reassuring,
"Was there any indication that it wasn't what he
wanted?"
Brad shook his head negative and ran through the events in his
head. "Nothing...we
even cuddled for a few hours afterward...I've never been with a
guy that cuddles..."
Colin was now thoroughly confused. "Okay, I'm going to call
him up and three way and
we'll get this figured out..."
"No!" Brad's yell echoed in the apartment. "What
if he doesn't want me to call? The
note sounded like he didn't even want to talk about last
night."
"Well..." Colin was either annoyed or thinking, Brad
couldn't tell which. "Maybe he's
just confused. You remember how it was your first time."
Brad remembered his first time all-too accurately. After they had
slept together he'd
never spoken with the jerk again.
"Maybe you should just call him."
"I don't know." Brad sighed, "I don't think he
wants me to call. Maybe I should wait
and see if he calls."
"Brad, the way I see it, you can either confront this or
ignore it."
Afraid of confrontation and afraid of what he might find out,
Brad chose the latter.
Luckily, Colin figured Brad would rather stick his head in the
sand than take the risk of
knowing Chip was gone for good.
* * * * *
"Colin?" Chip was confused when he heard the Canadian's
voice over the other line.
Col had never called him before, Ryan had on a few
occasions...but it was all business.
"What's up?"
"Oh, not much." Colin sounded happy enough, "Just
thought I'd call and see how your
date with Brad went last night."
"Oh, that." Chip sighed, "It was...okay, I
guess." He sat heavily on his couch once more,
petting his cat as it came up and nuzzled his palm.
"Well that's nice...did you do anything...interesting?"
"You mean, 'Did we have sex', don't you?"
"Well, maybe."
"Since you'll hear it from Brad later I suppose, yeah...we
did it." Chip tried to act
nonchalant. There was no telling how Brad would talk of the
encounter.
"Great. If you don't mind me asking, how was it?"
"Not bad." Chip tried not to lie, "You know, it
was a first..."
"Yeah. Well, that's great. I guess you'll be calling Brad
about a second date pretty
soon?"
"I don't know." Chip half-laughed, "Oh,
look..." He lied, "I've got to get to the set for
some last minute shots...um, I'll see you in Las Vegas, though,
okay?"
"Yeah, sure." Colin didn't realize he was being brushed
aside.
"Later." Chip hung up the phone and leaned back with a
heavy sigh. "Well kitty face,
I've got a guy that I think I'm falling in love with who
apparently isn't ready for a
commitment. And, I'm too chicken shit to ask exactly where we
stand." He scratched
behind the cat's ears. "At least things can't get any
worse."
With near perfect timing, he heard an earth shattering pop and
hit the ground. When the
smoke detector didn't sound and the world didn't come to an end,
Chip cautiously
approached the bathroom and saw the exploded can and shaving
cream all over the
white tile. "I should never say that."
* * * * *
"I made some brownies," Brad smiled, bringing the
wrapped tray aboard the small
private plane. It was finally Tuesday and the first of the group
was boarding for Vegas.
The few days had seemed to drag on for Brad, but he'd spent most
of it either sleeping
or cooking and trying to think as little as possible about Chip.
He was on the first flight with Ryan and Colin and Kathy and
Drew. The rest of the cast
wouldn't be leaving until later that evening.
"Hey you!" Ryan smiled, patting Brad on the shoulder as
he sat between he and Colin
in his seat.
"Hey." Brad smiled, passing around the tray and rather
grateful when Ryan took the last
one.
"How are things?" Colin smiled hopefully.
"Not bad." Brad forced a smile, "I've been
busy."
"How about that boy of yours?" Ryan laughed gently
elbowing Brad in the ribs.
"Well, you know...I've been busy redecorating and all...I
guess I really haven't had time
to talk to him since Friday morning."
"You did call him, didn't you?" Colin raised a hesitant
eyebrow, suspecting the answer
that was about to come.
"Um, well, I promised myself I'd alphabetize my bookshelf,
and by the time I was done
with that and going through the cabinets and sorting through my
sock drawer...it was
almost dark out, so I just went to be a little early." Brad
knew instantly that he should
have just lied and said he called.
Ryan cleared his throat slightly and clutched his airsickness
bag, letting Colin take care
of the lovelorn man.
"Oh man..." Colin shook his head, "So you still
haven't talked after he left?"
"He's busy...I'm busy, it just never happened."
"That's crap and you know it." Colin put a hand on
Brad's shoulder. "You're afraid to
talk to him, aren't you?"
"I never said that." Brad pursed his lips.
"You don't have to." Colin wished he could get Brad to
look him in the eyes, if even for
a moment.
"New boyfriend?" Drew turned around as the plane was
steady in the air.
"It's none of your business." Brad looked down at his
hands as he absentmindedly
played with a tissue.
"Ah...I see...one of those." Drew returned to his
headphones.
"Brad, I know you pretty damn well..." Colin was
frustrated with his friend and decided
it was time for a little tough love, "It's time you acted
like a man instead of a frightened
little girl."
"What?" Brad was strangely unoffended, it was weird to
hear anger coming out of Colin
that wasn't jokingly.
"You heard me." Colin snapped, "You're acting like
a little girl with her first crush! 'Oh,
does he like me? Well I don't know if I should ask because he
doesn't know I *really*
like him.' I'm about sick and tired of it." He was on a
roll, "If you don't talk to him pretty
damn soon, you'll never know. Maybe he'll get a new girlfriend,
and *forget* about you."
"Bu...Bu..." Brad didn't know if he should get angry or
cry. The lump in his throat told
him he was strongly favoring the latter and when trapped in
midair with four other people...
crying was the least graceful thing to do.
"Don't 'but' me, mister. If you want to even have a *CHANCE*
with him, you'll march
right up to him the second you see him and demand that he tell
you what he's thinking."
Colin raised an eyebrow, signaling that it was appropriate for
Brad to reply.
"I...I..." Brad stammered, forcing back the lump in his
throat, then looked to Ryan, not
sure of what to do when he saw Colin put on his headphones and
tune out.
Ryan, face pale and eyes closed as he clutched the white paper
bag to his chest, was
no help.
* * * * *
Chip smiled softly as he boarded the small plane and took his
seat in the back. He was
sandwiched between Greg and the window, but didn't seem to mind.
As the plane took
off and Greg seemed to be lost in his book, Chip opened his small
bag and took out his
journal and a pencil and opened to the next blank page as he
started another poem.
It had been his way of release his whole life, writing stupid
poetry or making up song
lyrics or anything else that popped into his head. In the course
of the last three days, he'd
managed to fill half a brand new journal with musings, lyrics,
poems and scribbles trying
to get Brad out of his system. After drawing a dark, but
half-hearted, spiral, he felt
inspired and jotted the beginning of a poem.
You made me feel like fire
Felt like I needed ice
Your scent, your touch
So very nice
I think I love you
But I can't be sure
You seem so innocent
You make me feel so
He began another spiral on the facing page as he waited for a
rhyming word to fit in
place.
"Pure." Greg smiled, reading over Chip's shoulder.
"Hmmm?" Chip looked over at his friend, drawn out
of his creative zone.
"I couldn't help myself." Greg smiled sheepishly.
"Pure fits." He pointed to the space
where the last word should go.
"Oh." Chip blushed and scribbled the word, then closed
the book and slid it back into
his bag. "Thanks."
"No problem." Greg's sheepish grin slid into one a
little more suave. "I didn't mean to
start reading over your shoulder, but I was curious."
"It's okay." Chip half-smiled, running a nervous hand
through his hair. "You know, just
some stuff I had to get out of my head."
"Oh, I hear you on that." the man nodded, "Looks
like you've got a crush..."
"Uh, no." Chip uncapped his water bottle and took a
sip. "Just a fling."
"Ah, fell for a one night stand?" Greg nodded
knowingly.
"Not really." Chip shook his head. "Just something
I thought would work out...but it...
uh...didn't."
Greg nodded knowingly once again. "Women, eh? Go
figure."
Chip couldn't help but smile when he remembered what Brad had
said about women.
"Yeah."
"It was a woman, wasn't it?" Greg smiled wickedly,
dropping his voice to a hushed
tone.
"Oh, of course." Chip nodded, trying not to choke on
another swallow of water. "Yeah,
I mean, it wouldn't
be a *guy*."
"Why not?" Greg leaned in, "I've seen the way you
look at Brad...I know there has to
be something there..."
Immediately, Chip straightened up, clearing his throat. "Oh,
no. I mean, Brad? Never.
He's so wrong for me."
"How? He's cute, smart, funny...if you aren't hung up on the
gender thing, he'd make the
perfect boyfriend."
"If you like him so much, why don't you date him?" Chip
tried to get out of the
conversation.
"I have my reasons." Greg replied smartly, "What
about you?"
Chip shrugged, "I just like women too much."
"Okay, let's say you didn't say that and really think what I
know you think. We both
know that all people are created bisexual and it's a choice. So,
say you could go either
way...would you date him?" He raised an eyebrow, sipping off
his own bottle.
Chip finally caved, "He's just not what I'm looking for. I'm
looking for a commitment
right now, and he's just out to have fun and get laid. I'm
through that phase."
Greg had to struggle to keep from spitting out his water as he
let out a guffawing laugh.
"You're kidding, right?"
"No, why?"
"We're talking about Brad *SHERWOOD* here, right? "
"Yeah."
"And you think he doesn't want a commitment? What kind of a
cardboard box have
you been living in?"
"What are you talking about?"
"That's all he ever wants, a *relationship*. I swear, it's
like he's got a wedding dress
picked out with every guy he likes." Greg managed to quell
his laughter when he noticed
the other people staring at him.
Chip ignored the stares when he processed the words. "Are
you sure? I mean, he still
wants a relationship?"
"Confidentially..." Greg continued when the curious
stares were gone, "I talked to Colin
last night and he said Brad's all heartbroken over this guy he
spent a night with. Says he
doesn't even want to date anymore because they're all out the
door before he wakes up
the next morning."
"You're kidding." Chip's voice held a serious tone as
he realized *HE* was the fling.
"Oh yeah, Col says he was all head over heels for this guy,
they did it once and he was
out the door. Didn't call or anything. Of course, being Brad, he
was too chicken to even
call the guy afterward."
Chip blinked several times and felt a blush rise in his cheeks.
"Well, I guess it was that
guy's loss."
"Sure was." Greg laughed, "But Brad's on the
rebound now..."
Chip laughed slightly, "Yeah, you can have him."
Greg shrugged as Chip ended the conversation by sliding on his
headphones. Once
again going back to his rather dry mystery novel, Greg couldn't
help but smile secretly.
Wayne had told him he caught Brad and Chip together, so when he
talked to Colin the
night before it all fell into place. Colin never mentioned any
names, but he was almost
sure the poem was about Brad.
* * * * *
Brad sighed as he ran over the room service menu. He knew Colin
had a point back on
the plane, but what Colin didn't understand was how hard it was
to confront a situation
that looks bad...especially when you want it to turn out well.
Giving up on food and deciding mixing with the crowd was his best
option, Brad
managed to find his way to the casino.
"I thought you didn't gamble." Ryan smiled softly at
Brad as he took a seat at the ten high
blackjack table.
"I normally don't, but I had to get out of the room."
Brad put a twenty on the table and
took the stack of dollar chips.
"I can understand that." Ryan nodded, "I'm sorry
for the way Colin got on the plane...
you know how he can be, though."
"Yeah." Brad nodded, hitting on sixteen and sighing as
a ten was dealt. "But I think he
has a very valid point...I just...I don't think he wants the same
things I'm looking for."
"You know, since I moved in with Col full time, I've learned
something I never would
have learned with the ex-wife." Ryan smiled, taking his
winnings when the dealer busted.
"You've got to give and take. And, I don't want to sound
like an asshole, but you're
being pretty damn selfish sitting around and whining about how
you 'just don't know'
and all that."
"What do you mean?" Brad put down his bet.
"Well, it took a lot to talk him into bed, Brad. He gave
quite a bit making that leap from
totally straight to sleeping with you." Ryan hit the table
for another card. "And you
haven't sacrificed anything. Yet you expected him to just fall
into your pattern. You
should know by now that it's not that easy. You have to work for
love."
Brad nodded, taking in the sage advice as he stood on his
nineteen. "So, you think I
should talk to him about it?"
"I know you should have talked to him about it when he
wasn't there Friday morning."
Ryan shrugged, watching his bet be pulled away when the dealer
showed blackjack.
"And since you didn't, I highly suggest mending that by
talking now."
"You're right." Brad nodded slightly, then turned to
the dealer to cash out his chips, "I
think I'm going to go find him."
"Try the bar." Ryan sighed.
"Which one? There's like three in this place." Brad
shook his head, sensing it wouldn't
be as easy as he thought to find the man.
Ryan shrugged, "I don't know everything, contrary to popular
belief." He laughed
victoriously as he landed twenty on a ten dollar bet. "Tell
you what though, why don't
you let Colin and I take you out for some dinner tonight? Meet up
at our room around
sevenish?"
With another sigh, Brad smiled and nodded an affirmative, then
pocketed his cash from
the dealer and went to the task of finding Chip.
* * * * *
"Heineken." Chip signaled the bartender for beer as he
took a stool at the end of the bar.
The place was almost empty, not unusual for a bar on a Tuesday at
just after six, but it
was still a bit unsettling. Chip sipped his beer when the
bartender set it in front of him.
He didn't quite know how he was going to handle things.
He and Brad would be performing on stage together, and that
wouldn't be a problem
because they were both professional enough to slip into a mode
while on stage...but in
the copious amounts of free time they would have, it was obvious
they were bound to
run into each other at some point or another.
"Long Island tea." Colin smiled, taking a seat beside
Chip. "Hey, fancy running into
*you* here."
"Yeah." Chip drank deeply once more, "How was your
flight?"
"Not bad. Ryan actually took it rather well." Colin
half laughed, cutting his drink with
water when it arrived. "You?"
Chip shrugged, "Had to sit by Greg."
"Ah." Colin smiled knowingly, Greg could get very
talkative on flights.
"It wasn't too bad, he just kinda said some things that
worried me a little." Chip picked
absently at a bowl of honey roasted peanuts. "You know,
about Brad."
"You haven't talked to Brad yet, have you?" Colin
sighed.
"I don't know what to say." Chip couldn't help but be
honest, "I want a relationship so
badly, but I don't know what he wants."
"You want a relationship?" Colin was actually half
shocked by the revelation.
"Well, yeah." Chip drained his mug and signaled for
another, "You know, settle down...
maybe start a family."
"Why did you leave?" Colin dropped the big question.
Chip looked into his fresh beer. It was a question he'd been
asking himself since he
woke up Friday on his couch. "At first I thought that maybe
he didn't want a relationship,
but I'm not sure anymore."
"Do you think that it being your first time could have been
a factor?" Colin tried to play
therapist.
"I think so." Chip sighed, "I mean, honestly
Colin, I don't know why I'm telling you all
this...but I was scared. When all this crap started, it was about
sex. That's all I wanted.
I would have settled for a mercy fuck if I could get it...but
when it happened...I felt like
it was something I needed. Like he was someone I needed. I don't
think I've ever felt
more at ease in my life, than when I was him."
Colin nodded, "Do you think you're in love with him?"
"I think so." Chip looked back up at Colin, "After
we did it...it was like...he was the
only person I wanted to be with. I mean, was I right to be
scared? When I felt myself
getting comfortable with him like that...I didn't know what to
think. Can I fall in love
with someone just like that?"
Colin couldn't help but smile as he put one hand over Chip's,
"I think you can...and did."
He went back to sipping his drink, "You know Brad feels the
same way."
"I do now, Greg kind of helped me figure everything out on
the plane." Chip sighed.
"That's why I'm here...trying to drink out the courage to
actually talk to Brad about this."
"I promised Ryan I'd be his good luck charm at the blackjack
table." Colin smiled,
standing up and taking his drink, "But I hope you have good
luck with Brad...I know
everything will work out in the end, it always does."
Chip melted with the warm smile and stood, sliding his arms
around Colin in a gentle
hug. "Thanks, I needed to hear that."
"I know." Colin gave a quick squeeze, "Feel free
to call my room if you need anything,
okay? Why don't you go get a massage or something and meet Ryan
and I for dinner?"
Chip nodded, pulling away. "I'll do that."
"Okay, around seven, meet up in our room and we'll decide
where to go then." Colin
smiled, leaving the man to his beer.
* * * * *
Brad sighed as he checked the time, it was already six thirty and
he hadn't seen hide
nor hair of Chip in either of the casino bars or at any of the
tables.
He knew if all else failed, he could easily get Chip's room
number and go there...but
part of him wanted any confrontation to be on neutral ground, not
in either of their hotel
rooms.
A couple minutes early, but ready for the break, he knocked
gently on the door to Ryan
and Colin's room.
"Hi." Colin smiled broadly as he opened the door and
let Brad in. "You're early..."
"Yeah, I wasn't doing anything *important*." Brad
rolled his eyes and took a seat on
the plush blue couch as Ryan came out of the bathroom wearing a
towel around his
waist.
"Hey Brad." Ryan smiled, running a smaller towel over
his wet hair. "I wasn't expecting
you for another fifteen minutes or so."
"Well, I hope I didn't interrupt anything..." Brad
started.
"Oh, no." Colin shook his head. "I've just been
watching a little television."
"I was showering." Ryan shrugged.
"So, where do you want to go for dinner?" Brad changed
the subject.
"Actually, there's this big place down in Laughlin that Ryan
wanted to go see." Colin
shrugged, "They're running a pretty large auto show..."
"After we do a walk through, I thought we could get
something to eat right there, and
then maybe go bowling or something...they've got a bowling alley
right in the casino."
Ryan added.
Brad nodded, "Oh yeah, out at..." He tried to remember
the name, "The Riverboat?
Something like that."
"Riverside." Colin picked up the brochure Ryan had
picked up somewhere or other as
he sat on their huge bed.
"Either way, I thought we could go on ahead and pick up a
rental car and do that,
maybe stay until late and come back to sleep off our
hangovers." Ryan laughed.
"I won't be drinking, of course." Colin rolled his
eyes, he'd become the usual designated
driver when the guys went a little overboard.
"Sounds like a plan." Brad stood up, smoothing out his
black and blue zipper shirt. "We
can go pick up the car while Ryan gets ready..."
"Oh, I'll be right out." Ryan disappeared back into the
bathroom after plucking an outfit
out of an open suitcase on the bed.
"Besides, we're waiting for someone else I invited."
Colin smiled softly as Brad sat back
on the couch.
"Oh, who else will be joining us?" Brad was a little
surprised, Ryan hadn't mentioned it
would be a group activity.
Almost as if on cue, a knock sounded on the door.
"That should be him right now." Colin smiled, getting
up to answer the door. As
expected, it was Chip.
"Hey Col." Chip beamed as the Canadian let him in, the
felt his stomach sink when he
saw Brad. "Hey." He managed a small wave at Brad.
"Hi, Chip." Brad forced a smile and nod.
"Well, are we ready to blow this joint?" Ryan smirked,
exiting the bathroom before
things could get even more tense.
* * * * *
The ride in the rented convertible had been happy enough, the
four of them belting out
oldies as they went. Dinner had been a little more tense, but
only because small talk
was short.
By the time they made it to the car show, it had become quite
obvious to all four that
someone was going to have to say something.
Colin escorted Ryan a little bit ahead of the other pair, making
sure they were still in
earshot in case a rescue was needed.
Brad knew this was his chance. He figured it had all been
orchestrated by Colin and
Ryan either way, but if he was going to say something there was
no time better than the
present
"Wow, the DeLorian." Chip smiled, only really half
amused by the car that had been in
'Back To The Future'.
"I've always been more of a Cadillac man, myself." Brad
smiled, running his hands over
the thick felt ropes as he eyed a large purple '52. "There's
just something about them
that screams permanence, stability and luxury, all in a sturdy
family boat."
Chip laughed under his breath, the sound almost harsh in the
nearly empty room. "My
dad used to have a Cadillac. Always told me that when I meet the
girl of my dreams, I
should settle down and buy a large car like that."
Brad felt his smile droop as he continued to nervously stroke the
plush rope. "Do you
ever sometimes think that you'll never meet the right
*girl*?" He couldn't bring himself
to look at Chip.
"Well, I think when I meet the right person...girl or guy or
whatever...I'll probably just
mess it up. I have this weird tendency to read people *so*
wrong." Chip realized what
Brad was leading up to. "But I would hope they'd give me a
second chance to tell them
how I feel."
Brad took a deep breath, then turned to Chip, smiling slightly,
"Wanna cosign on a loan
for a Caddy?"
Chip couldn't help but laugh as Brad took him in a strong hug,
each dissolving into a
puddle of giggles.
"Only if you'll let me stay the night." Chip let
his eyes lock on Brad's as their laughter
tapered away.
"I've still got your toothbrush." Brad smiled
softly, just absorbing the feel of Chip's
arms around his middle as his own locked around the other man's
shoulders. Being
close to the same height had its advantages.
Chip sighed softly, letting his head rest comfortably on Brad's
shoulder. "I'm sorry I left
the other morning...I just..."
"I know." Brad ran his hand down the smooth cut of
Chip's hair. "You were just as
scared as I was."
Chip let one arm stay looped around Brad's waist as they walked
through the exhibit,
paying close attention to the Harley's at the end when they
caught back up with Colin
and Ryan.
"So, what do you want to do now?" Colin smiled softly,
glad to see both appeared to
have worked things out.
"I don't know." Brad half shrugged, "Any
ideas."
"We could go back the hotel." Ryan raised an eyebrow.
"We can drink just as easily
there and won't get as lost when we have to drunkenly stumble
back to our rooms."
Chip laughed. "I think we could go back to the hotel. I've
got some...uh...lyrics and
stuff I'd like to show Brad."
Colin smiled knowingly, "The hotel it is, then."
* * * * *
Brad entered his room, watching Chip disappear into his own to
grab a change of
clothes and anything else he might need for spending the night.
After letting the door
slide closed, Brad let a happy screech out of his throat,
sounding not unlike a teenage
girl. It was more than a relief to know things were good with he
and Chip. That they
were going head first into a relationship, even.
Falling to the bed in a gale of happy giggles, Brad curled up and
sighed contentedly.
Things were finally starting to feel good. Slowly getting back to
his feet, he went to
where he'd left his travel case open and managed to find his
apple scented lotion and
rubbed it on his hands, twirling off his ring. He contemplated
calling room service for
a bottle of champagne but heard Chip's slight knock first.
"Hey." Chip smiled broadly, meeting Brad in a slow kiss
as he was let into the room.
"Mmm...minty." Brad pulled away, a smile painting his
face.
"I know how big a pet peeve it is for you." Chip
laughed, sitting easily on the bed and
kicking off his shoes.
Changing the subject, Brad tried to set some plans for the next
day, "Sigfried and Roy
are doing a show tomorrow night. We can go if you want."
"I have to go shopping first, I need some new shoes."
Chip hung his head, "But I hate
going alone."
Brad raised an eyebrow, "You're here with Mr. Shopaholic.
We'll go shopping."
"Maybe we'll get a shirt for you to wear on stage. Something
we pick out together."
Chip laughed slightly.
"Would you be interested in having room service bring up
some wine? Maybe
champagne?" Brad changed subject again as ran his fingers
over Chip's forehead,
bringing forward a few small sections of the soft brown hair.
"Well, I'm not exactly a connoisseur, but if you want it, I
could go for some wine."
Chip took Brad's hand in his own as it caressed his cheek
lovingly.
"Maybe a soft red?"
Chip smiled softly, pressing his lips to the hand he clasped
tightly. "If it's what you want."
"I've already got what I want." Brad was in Heaven as
Chip's face was pressed to his
chest. "The rest is all for show."
Brad gently massaged Chip's shoulders as he sank to the bed. A
pensive look crossed
his face as he tried to anticipate Chip's next move. He was
knocked for a loop when it
came.
"I think I'm in love with you." Chip's words were soft,
but sure, as he let his cheek rest
on the massaging hand to his left.
Brad swallowed roughly, it was strange to hear the words. He'd
heard them said a
thousand times in TV shows and movies and love songs, but never
in his life had they
been said to him. He didn't know how to reply, other than
honestly. "I think I'm in love
with you too."
"There's something I need to tell you before we do what I
think we're about to do."
Chip's voice took a rather haunting soft tone.
"You can tell me anything." Brad tried to be sure, but
was scared of what the man
might have to say. It could really be anything at all, Chip was
all surprises for him.
"That first time, in my apartment, I...I was scared half to
death." an almost foreign
sounding laugh lighted his speech, "But I was so attracted
to you, I would have risked
never seeing you again just to have sex with you."
Brad took the information in. He didn't know how to respond, so
he let Chip continue.
"I don't know if I could have turned away had something
actually happened, but I
wanted you to know that if I could have...I would have." His
voice shook with fear. It
was something he had to get off his chest before he could even
think of going on
normally with Brad.
"What made you change your mind?" Brad was honestly
curious after the shock
subsided.
"I don't know." Chip's response was slowed, as he
searched for the answer himself.
"The other night I seemed to want more the second I saw you.
It was like this hole deep
inside of me had filled with who you are...and who I am with you.
You were that piece
of the big, cosmic, puzzle that never seemed to be whole. At the
risk of sounding
horribly cliché, you complete me in so many ways."
"Kiss me." Brad's words were soft, without a hint of
demand behind them. "Make love
to me, I love you more than anyone I've ever thought I loved
before."
Chip smiled, turning towards his new conquest and stripped Brad
like a Christmas
present. Only, he was sure years after that day was gone he'd
still playing with *that*
particular toy.
*****
END
*****