| Instructions for the Man I'm Spending My Life With I think the nicest thing I can do for my lovey is tell him about those cute little things about myself that make me so charming. It makes life easier for both of us! 1. I'm repetitious. I will state an opinion or feeling or instruction until you acknowledge that you heard me and you convince me that you will keep it in mind. I also have a repertoire of about 100 stories that I like to share. I will share these with you. Again. And again. And again. It's part of my charm, so just accept it. 2. I want you to enjoy a full range of hobbies that will make you a well-rounded, interesting, happy person, and that will also keep me interested in you. I will give you time and space to cultivate these, but you have to give me the same so I can develop mine. 3. None of these hobbies, however, should ever take precedence over me or our family. If someone is sick, you need to be there. If there's a family event of some significance, you need to be there. If I want some quality time, you need to be there. Trust that I won't abuse this "power," but understand that in order to be with me, your family has to be your priority. 4. Reagrding money, we'll most likely never have enough of it, but we should be able to make ends meet, and have some luxuries, just fine. I worry enough about money as it is. Leave that to me. I'll need you to help keep me rational. 5. I need to feel, on a regular basis, that you adore me. Even when we fight, I need to know you're still in this with me. Don't ever take for granted that I just know how you feel. I may know, but I still want you to fawn over me like I'm the greatest thing on earth. This goes with my needing to be your priority. I need to know that you see us as a team and that my needs and desires are as important as your own. And without question, I will be the same with you. 6. Although I will want to spend a lot of time with you, I will need alone time on a regular basis, mostly to shop and to write. These are activities I can thoroughly enjoy only if I do them alone. All that I require is that you give me the space to enjoy these things, without any strings attached. 7. At the same time, there may be instances where I will either want or need you to run errands with me, and if I do, just consider yourself lucky that I want you around me the whole day and go with it. Either you will be helping me make critical decisions on the redesigning of our home, or you will be carrying heavy shit that I can't. Again, trust that I won't ask this of you all the time, but that if I do, there's good reason for it. 8. I don't do dishes. And if I have to, you can bet that I will bitch and whine and sigh the whole way through. 9. It appears that I ask a lot of questions, especially during movies and TV shows. I will fire away a slew of questions until I'm exhausted. Sometimes, I know you don't know the answer, but I will ask anyway. The thing for you to do is to just let me ask. If I feel you can provide an answer, I will ask again when the show's over. And then you better answer. 10. I'm repetitious. I will state an opinion or feeling or instruction until you acknowledge that you heard me and you convince me that you will keep it in mind. I also have a repertoire of about 100 stories that I like to share. I will share these with you. Again. And again. And again. It's part of my charm, so just accept it. |
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| Image copyright DC Comics 1979 |