| Yaarrr, Maties, I'm Sinking Your Pretty Little Ship Late Spring 2004 Sometimes you have to learn which battles to fight. Not because some battles may not be worth the fight, but simply because some things you don't have the right to fight for. I've thought long and hard about this, because many times I've found myself fighting for things that in end I really had no right to fight for. I was fighting simply because I was willful or stubborn or proud -- qualities that are fine in their time and place, but were not in these cases. And yet, I think I've been able to do something most people can't or won't: I realized what I was doing, grew the fuck up, and let go. I mean, at this point in my life, I can look at a situation and evaluate if I should fight for someone or something, and if I even have the right to do so. I may be an extremely proud person, but I'd like to think that I no longer behave like I did in high school and college. Life's taught me a few good lessons about humility and the fact that no amount of pride or sense of righteousness can make something mine if it's not my business to have it. So from my perspective, people in situations that they should have long ago let go of, but refuse to do so, constantly fascinate me. I mean, why are you fighting a battle you will never win? If you're 5'5" and have never even modeled for a catalog before, why do you insist you're thisclose to being discovered as the next big model? Because someone told you you were pretty and your mom had some headshots done when you were a kid? If the guy's already told you that he's not interested in being with you, why continue to proclaim him the love of your life that you will fight to the death for? Because he liked you for two seconds and put his dick in you? If you never studied politics and have very minimal experience in it, why persist in running for a high office you can't possibly manage? Because your teacher told you had good leadership skills and you heard God tell you the world needs your vision? Let it go, people. No matter how fervently you believe otherwise, some people/careers/accomplishments are not yours to have. Because you never did enough to deserve them; because they belong to someone else; because you're not talented enough; because destiny is just not on your side. And you know it; deep inside, you know it. This concept may be hardest to accept in matters of the heart. But well, too fucking bad. It's so pathetic to hear about people who either get completely hung up on what is basically a brief, meaningless thing, or who manipulate their way through a relationship (and then get pissed when the expected results don't show), and yet stubbornly insist that the other person is THE ONE. Bull shit. You're just fixated because your feelings were not reciprocated or all your clever little tricks failed. Here's a tip: if it doesn't last, or if you have to resort to childish games (with or without any real provocation), it's not love and it's not meant to be! There just some times when the only smart thing to do is hang the white flag from your door -- and go down with the ship. |
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| Image copyright DC Comics 1979 |