Not So Deep Thoughts

12/16/04 11:06pm

Yay! I got the coolest card from my Amandakitty today. Good luck with your pie. I'm an apple or cherry gal, myself. But then I've never had blueberry, so I should shut up now. Much love, darling! ♥

Hope everyone's finals are going well. Good luck to those who still have some! ♣

I've taken the gauze out, but I'm still tasting blood. The dental dude called me a little before 8pm from his cell phone to check on me and ask if I had questions about anything. I just asked about the stitches (they do dissolve!) and he reminded me to sleep with my head elevated, if possible. I had some noodle soup for dinner, but I could kill for a pizza. Or Taco Bell. But I still have a few days before I can handle the sharp, pointy goodness of nachos. I wonder if I dunk them in milk whether I'm ready for Sausolitos.....

I was pretty sure my Bob was pissed at me for passing out and bailing on him last night, but he called me nonetheless to check up on me. I have the bestest friends, I tell you.

Nana called and was surprised I answered the phone. I feel a little uncomfortable, but otherwise I'm doing alright. Keeping the ice on and taking my Panlor every 4 to 6 hours like a good little patient. Watched some TV, read a bit, talked to Mihir ever so briefly, and now am bored. This Panlor stuff is supposed to make me drowsy, but I'm wide the freak awake. I should know by now when something says it'll make me drowsy I'll be awake all night. Maybe I'll rent some games and break out the Gamecube tomorrow. Or get some movies. I dunno. Something because staying at home is quite boring.

12/16/04 1:30pm

Went and got all four wisdom teeth yanked today. Took over an hour to do since the bottom two were so impacted and the roots were growing in opposite directions. He had to pop off the crowns then dig out the roots. I'm not the best patient, I know, but I was a real trooper. He tried taking the first one out before I was completely numb. When he realized what was happening, he let me numb up further, then when he came back in he had 3 assistants with him instead of the two from before. Kind of amused me that it took so many people. That's like a person per tooth. Dude.

Now the bottom part of my jaw is super numb, and my lower lip feels swollen. I'm not too puffy, but mom bought me an ice pack and will be back later with soup for me. I'm going to take a nap because that ordeal was exhausting.

I miss Mihir.

12/15/04

I've succeeded in getting rid of the icky boy smell in this apartment. I went to the store last night and bought 2 Renuzit air freshener things and a spray, all in the scent of Crisp Cotton. I also bought some carpet deodorizer to use when I vacuum. I used Fabreeze on the couch. I changed the shower curtain. I bought cinnamon rolls to make today. However, these boys have no baking sheets. What the hell? I swear, by the time they get back, it's gonna look like Martha Stewart exploded in here.

12/13/04

From now on all my posts will mention missing my boyfriend at least once. Sorry. I got to talk to him briefly this morning, but he had to go eat and shower. So I'm about to run and return this webcam I bought since I got the old one working on his computer. Yay! I'm wearing his clothes on and off while he's gone cause I miss him so much. Except the teal shirt I hate. I might hide it before he gets back. Like, in the dumpster.

Kim and I pigged out on chicken and mashed potatoes last night, then watched Desperate Housewives, followed by Cruel Intentions. I finished her Christmas gift, and am working on Melissa's next. I also cut Kim's hair last night. Took off about 3, maybe four inches. It looks so cute. She was surprised. Ye of little faith. I've been cutting Mom's hair for years. And coloring, too. Which reminds me, I have to touch mine up soon.

Yuck. Thursday is almost here. Not too psyched about that. My mouth hasn't bothered me at all recently. Is it still necessary to get all 4 wisdom teeth yanked out?

12/12/04

My dryer broke last night. It still heats, but it won't tumble. So I have a hot, wet mess of clothes. I might have to go the laundromat tonight or in the morning. I hate that place with a purple passion. Perhaps I'll search for one closer to the apartment.

I got to talk to Mihir today. I miss him SO MUCH. He text messaged my phone to see if he could call me, he called, then we got online and talked on Yahoo for a few hours. It was a little after 2am his time when he went to bed. I feel a lot better since I got this webcam working and we could see each other. It's not the same as him being here, but it's better than nothing. Chances are I'll get up early to talk to him in the morning before I go to work. Thank God for Brandon. He hooked me up with the disk I needed to run my program, so now I don't have to kill anyone or kick anything.

My hands are cold. I should turn the heat up. Or bring my gloves over when I go home. I have to go home for a bit to pack my bag, bring some stuff over since I'm spending the night tonight. I also have some more projects I need to start and some to finish.

I think I'll call Kim to see if she wants to go to KFC with me, cause I'm effin' starving and could use some greasy chicken.

12/11/04 The Gay Agenda

There's a rumor going around that we homos have an "agenda." I'm here to set the record straight: It's true, we do.

We are out to bastardize your marriages with concepts like love. We are corrupting your children with ideals like self-acceptance. We are toppling the very foundation of your society with ethics like equal rights.

We have stolen every color of your rainbow, so take that!

I personally have taken some steps to further our cause.

For instance, this man and woman were walking in front of me, in the middle of the sidewalk, holding hands! Can you believe this guy had the audacity to display a part of his breeding ritual right there, where children could see! Furthermore, his fashion sense made it clear he had absolutely no class, so I kicked his ass! What kind of sicko would choose to live like that?

In our top-secret homo headquarters you'll find the blueprints to turn every McDonald's into a nightclub, every Wendy's into a hair salon, and every Burger King into a coffee house . . . with poetry readings!

You will discover that we have in fact stolen certain geometric figures, laying claim to the triangle and coloring it pink.

The Christian Coalition is really one of our many puppets. After all, we had to make it seem like someone was opposing us. And God knows, queens do love drama.

Yes, GAP does stand for gay and proud, so fall into the GAP or I will push you! And yes, skittles? Tasting the rainbow? All us.

When people say "You are so gay," it's actually because we sneak into their homes while they're sleeping and brainwash them into saying it, in the hopes you will one day think "Hot damn, I am in fact so gay!"

We are breaking your stereotypes, becoming doctors, lawyers, construction workers, sports stars, so that your attention will be averted while our sissy-queer-fruit brothers attack you from behind, limp wrists pounding away.

So yes, we've got an agenda.

Oh yeah, and being accepted without struggling our entire lives is on the list.

But don't worry, it's closer to the bottom.

12/10/04

When I stay at Mihir's, I use Yahoo! Messenger cause they haven't downloaded AIM and I feel funny adding stuff to their computer like I live here or something. My screenname on there is Jelilia. So if I'm not on AIM, check Yahoo!

12/9/04

SO sad. Just dropped the boy off at the airport. Hearing a plane outside the window, wondering if it's his. I'm at his place right now since I don't have to be to work for another 2 hours. Most of my stuff is here since I've been staying over the last few days. The scene at the airport was really sweet. Neither of us cried (unless you count my panic attack when I got lost after parking the car and couldn't find him), but we hugged, and he kissed me in public. He rarely shows affection in public, and NEVER kisses me in public. I was like, "Whoa." I didn't leave him until he'd gotten all checked in and through security. They took him outside for a special screening. I don't know if it was because of his ethnicity or if there was something else going on, as I wasn't back there. But he made it through with no problems and gave me a thumbs up and blew me a kiss. I made my way out to the garage to find the car, and he called my cell phone to tell me he missed me already. I told him to let me get out of the garage and onto the highway and I'd call him back. When I did, he was already eating the lunch I'd packed him. Luckily, I packed two, because I know he can be a little piglet.

Last night's ultra romantic evening started a little late, and with me being slightly irritated, but it turned out no less than perfect. We had to finish the errands, and I was getting cranky because the only thing I'd eaten all day was a Snicker's bar. We got home about 8, maybe 8:30 and I started cooking. I made the stir fry, the rice and some egg rolls. I lit a candle and turned out the rest of the lights. We ate and talked and held hands. There was much romance following, but I'll omit those details. A little later, after we'd cleared the table, and he finished his packing, we went to his room where I'd set up all the blankets and pillows in the middle of the floor and surrounded the area with lit candles. I put the container of chocolate dipped strawberries I made in the center, and we laid on pillows and fed each other. We got to sleep rather late, and had to be up sorta early to get some last minute stuff done before leaving for the airport. All day today he kept using the word "phenomenal" to describe last night and thanked me over and over. I'm really going to miss him. Good thing: I get to use his apartment while he's gone so I'll have a bit more privacy than at home. Bad thing: I'm definitely going to have to clean in here. The place needs a woman's touch, for sure.

12/8/04

What. A. Day.

After we dropped our friends at the airport, he got us lost on the way home. Granted, I'm more native to the area than he is, but I haven't been to Detroit Metro for about 6 years, and he just took another friend on Monday, so I figured he'd know the way!! We went an hour and a half out of our way, and add to that the fact that he now has a flat tire, and you can pretty much guess my mood for the day. Though, it's his last day in town for some time, and I've really been trying to keep my temper in check.

I'm finally done with all the running and prepping I had to do for tonight. I am sitting in his apartment waiting on him to get here because he wants me to run to the store with him before I make dinner. I'm making my specialty tonight (chicken stir fry and fried rice), followed later by chocolate covered strawberries. I also have regular strawberries that I thought might be nice with champagne, but I'm neither one of us really digs champagne, so I dunno what to do with 'em. I have every pillow and blanket from the house in his room, and about a zillion candles. I even curled my hair.

I'm all giddy and excited. He just called, and I'm meeting him downstairs so he can't see the apartment til we get back. Muahahahahaha!

12/7/04

He leaves Thursday; I'm not too thrilled, but I'm dealing. We're cleaning and packing tonight and I have an ultra romantic evening planned for tomorrow. But I can't divulge that information just yet as he has a habit of reading over my shoulder. I'm getting keys to the apartment to check the mail; I have big plans to clean in here and weed out the undesirables in his closet. Muhahahahahaha!

I ¢¾ Bree the best. Thanks for the email. Much discussing resulted. I'm not allowed to buy any of them here; he wants it to be authentic and from India.

I'm getting presents in January. Lots of 'em. But most importantly he'll be back. So yay for January. I wonder if I can just sleep through Christmas and New Year's....?

Ok, back to the packing and the list making. Tomorrow we have errands to run; luckily I'm off all day so he'll get stuff done. I'm super organized, especially compared to him. Last minute shopping, packing, key copying, arranging for bills to be paid and whatnot. Also, I have to run home and finish preparations for above mentioned romance. Woot.

12/6/04

Call me crazy, but sometimes I feel like certain friends and family members who should be there for me and love me unconditionally aren't living up to their end of the bargain. In some specific cases, I think it's due to resentment for having a boyfriend and being happy instead of wallowing in self misery like I used to. Sure, Mihir and I have our problems now and again, but who doesn't? It doesn't mean I don't love him. And by loving him, it doesn't mean I have less love for those friends or family members. It just sucks feeling like people who should be there are distancing themselves and not knowing the full reason why.

Yay. Now I get to go to work.

12/4/04

Night of a million exes....
Okay, just two.

Sometimes, I really don't know what to think.

Hockey last night was cool. The Storm won. I ran into Kelly, he asked for my number, I told him I'd give it to him later then successfully avoided him the rest of the night. Well, not so much avoided as he was sitting directly across the ice from me, but I was able to not run into him again.

After the game Kim and I went to McDonald's because she was dying for a double cheeseburger. Josh was definitely working. That's all I have to say on that.

I have to stick it out at the Crossings for the next week and a half. Then I'm free. The awesome part is my raise is still going into effect, so I'll be doing the same crap job for way more money. Woot! The shitty part is I'm still at the Crossings. Suck. In a way, I'm glad to finish the semester with the crew I have because we're all pretty tight. But I really am going to miss Carol, and Toni makes me nuts. She came in today chock full of attitude toward me. I just smiled and said, "See ya," and left an hour early. Went to the library, got a few DVDs, exchanged text messages with Mihir and Dinesh (they're at a conference I skipped), and came home to a clean house. I love when Mom has a day off.

I'm contemplating a nap now.

12/3/04

Wednesday I spent the day at South to kind of learn the ropes and see what I'd be doing. After lunch we had a manager's meeting, which was just as boring and pointless as I remember. Then I talked to Don and got myself a $9,000 a year raise. Woot! Things were fabulous.
Last night I worked with Pat to train her in my position at the Crossings. Since she'll be stepping into my current schedule, we decided it would be a good idea for her to close with me last night and open with me Saturday. Everything ran so smoothly and went so well. She was very positive, but slightly overwhelmed. I explained a few things to her, told the students pretty much knew what they were doing and if she lets them do their thing, she'll have no problems. Today, Carol calls and asks what happened with Pat last night. I have no freakin' clue what she's even talking about. Apparently, today, Pat went to Don and said today was her last day. Meaning there's no one to replace the position I'm vacating, meaning I don't get my promotion until there is someone. That's some shit right there. I'm so pissed I'm shaking. Of course, Don hasn't called to tell me any of this. Leave it up to me to get ahold of him and find out where my job stands.
Bullshit.

11/30/04

I finally got my promotion!

I start Monday as the new general manager of South Dining Hall. Tomorrow I'm renegotiating my raise. We'll see what happens.

11/27/04

Got a get well card from Nana today. Even though I've been better for about two weeks now. But it's the thought that counts. She finally got a copy of my senior picture and sent it back. Yeah. I graduated in 1997. And she just now was able to get a copy (because it's the only print of that pose I have). Why did it take 7 1/2 years years, you ask? Because that's how they treat her. When she asks for something they blow it off unless it's really important. Like her scrips or a doctor's appointment. Or something for them. She was supposed to get an oxygen delivery earlier this week. She had to call back because they never showed up! The woman is basically a shut in who lives on an oxygen machine. I'd think perhaps remembering to deliver her supply might be important?!

Waiting for the dryer to finish so I can have my jacket to go run errands. I have to stop at the post office to stamp and send my cards (you know, the ones I've had done for a week now), return movies, go to the bank, pick up my scrip, go to the library, and pick up lunch for mom and myself. Afterwards, it promises to be a beautiful afternoon of loafing. The only other thing I really have going on today is laundry. I told him to bring it over, not realizing he hasn't done wash in a month or so. I do believe every article of clothing he owns, with the exception of what he had on when he left, and what's in the drawer in my room in, is on the floor of my basement. Are all men this helpless? Or do they just forget how to do things when they're in a relationship?

11/25/047:32pm

Dinner went well. Mom and I made a trip to Kroger and got some stuff, and it took us all of half an hour (tops!) to make dinner. We had turkey, meatloaf, mashed potatoes and gravy, stuffing, corn, Nana's applesauce, and I made some chipotle rice for Mihir so he wouldn't complain that there was no spicy food. Just smelling the rice made my belly flop. Ick. I hate spicy food.

My pies turned out okay, except the crust on one kinda flopped and ripped, but the filling stayed in, so yay! If I ever finish the dishes, I'll cut the pie. No pie til dishes are done. Which might make one think perhaps a certain boyfriend would get his butt out here and help. But he disappeared promptly after taking his dish to the sink and is now watching my Spider Man DVD.

The man came to fix the wires in the backyard. But he said they needed to be clipped, and the neighbor lady would have to call an electrician. Because the electric company doesn't clip the fallen wires. Nice.

I really want pie. Which means I better get my hiney to the sink. *sigh* Whose stupid no dessert til dishes are done rule is this, anyway?

11/25/0412:09pm

Tuesday night was the UT/BG game. Huge rivalry, good game. I worked in the press tower instead of in a tent. I worked from 10:30 in the morning until about 11:30 in the evening. My legs still hurt from all the running I was doing. Once the game starts, the elevator goes up, stopping at each floor, and doesn't stop on the way down until it gets to ground. So to go down, you have to go up, then all the way down, then back up again. Or just take the stairs. Hence the pain. I haven't worked my legs like that in quite some time. A lot of really cool people were on our floor, and it was an easy night.

After I got off work, I went to pick up Mihir. While I was waiting in the car, a pizza delivery girl knocked on my window to ask me where 2726 was. I told her where I thought it would be, but since I didn't live in the neighborhood, I wasn't sure. She's walked up and down the street on both sides and couldn't find it, so she asked to use my phone. I let her. She called the number and it was a fax line. She called back to Papa John's and asked for the information again, but it was the same she had. Five pizzas for 2726 Alisdale (no apartment number) and a wrong phone number. She was so grateful to me for letting me use her phone, she gave me one of the pizzas. Which was awesome, since I was starving.

On the way home, he suggested we rent some movies. So we went to Family Video and rented Stepford Wives, Miracle, and Secret Window. Because Miracle was a five day Disney rental, I got a free Disney cup. I only heard three of the four options, because when she said Finding Nemo I cut her off. I didn't need to hear anything else. I love that movie.

It was hella windy yesterday. An all around shitty day, weather-wise. The huge ass pine tree in our backyard snapped and fell over. I heard the crash, but it wasn't until Mom got home and was calling the landlord and electric company that I realized what happened. The tree fell over the neighbor's fence, across some power lines, smashed the awning on her backporch and blocked her backdoor. That was around 2, maybe 3 in the afternoon. We made the necessary phone calls, and the electric company came about an hour later to say they were here, but changing shifts, so the next crew would take care of everything. They didn't come back til half past midnight. With a chainsaw. Good thing I was up watching The Wedding Singer on TBS.

I finally got to see the finale to He's a Lady. I was so happy David won! Yay for fat chicks!

Today is Thanksgiving. Mom and I have decided to forego the traditional turkey dinner and parade bullshit. We're just hanging out and doing whatever. I might bake a pie later, but prolly not since I'll be the only one to eat it (Mom hates pumpkin pie). We haven't decided if we're going out or just grazing here today. Jared and Salma will end up going to her folks' then to our dad's, so no reason for us to cook for just the two of us. It's all good.

11/20/04

I worked all morning. And when I say worked, I mean I pretty much sat around and read a book because we were dead. Even though there wasn't a lot of work to do, I'm so stressed out. There's a lot of shit going on over there, and the devil is supposed to come back after Thanksgiving. I can't work with her. She hates me.

I had eggs and toast for breakfast, and now every time I burp (which seems to be a lot) I taste sulfer. It's seriously making me feel like I'm going to throw up again.

I'm trying to get the rest of the laundry done, then I can take my bath and get ready for tonight. There's some light festival at 6:30pm, then a dance afterward. We haven't gone out and done anything in some time now. It will be nice to have a night out with my boyfriend. Even if I have to be home by 10 so I can get some sleep befoore going to work at 6:30am. Blah. I hate opening on the weekends. I hope I end up at Parks or South so I won't have to go in until 9am.

11/19/045:15pm

Cool. Got 4 loads of wash done, cleaned litter boxes, mopped the kitchen floor, had a bath, ate half of a leftover burrito for lunch, got my banking done, went to the library and got some minor shopping done. I called the vet about Ferris's medicine, but haven't heard back yet. I also finally returned a purchase I had made before Halloween. It's been sitting in the car for almost a month, and all I got was a lousy store credit because I couldn't find the receipt. Damn.

I get the feeling my boyfriend is going to stop over and "surprise" me this evening. I really need to get that key back.

I'm waiting for the floor to dry so I can go get another load of wash started. Hopefully Mom gets here soon so we can get dinner. That burrito was enough at the time, but I knew it wouldn't last long. Maybe we'll get that Chinese. Mmmmm...I could go for some green tea right now.

11/19/0412:31pm

I am off today. Wheeeeeeeeeeee! There's so much I need to do, and I probably won't do any of it. I had wanted to clean the house, do some laundry, and go to the bank and the library. I had wanted to sort through my mail and separate the junk from the important stuff. I need to do that title thingy for my car. There's a survey I should fill out for St. Charles. I also need a bath. And I'm hungry. I think after I hit the library and bank I'll go to my favorite Chinese restaurant and chow. Beef and broccoli or chicken fried rice? Oh, the decisions.

Right then, I need to dry my jeans if I'm going to leave the house. Oh, and I have to call Nana back

11/17/04

Didn't get my teeth pulled yesterday. They did an x-ray, determined it's not as serious as Dr. Doogie thought, and it can wait until December 16th. I have to use special mouthwash to keep the spaces cleaned out so as to not get infection. I don't have an abscess, as Dr. Doogie said. The oral surgeon was not pleased with the fact I don't have a regular dentist (no dental insurance, yo) and went to the er where "they don't know crap about teeth." Tell me how ya really feel, doc.

Tonight is the first night Mihir has stayed over in quite some time. Mainly because he fucked up his ankle, and I'm taking care of him. Poor guy. No idea what he did, but he used up his insurance quota at the med center when he went about his mouth (which was damn stupid on his part), so now he won't go about his ankle because he'll have to pay. *rolls eyes* He leaves on the 9th and won't be back til January 14th. In a way I'm looking forward to it, in a way, not so much.

Worked today. Candlelight Thanksgiving Dinner. Big event. Went well. My back and hip are killing me. I haven't worked that hard in weeks. Dammit.

11/13/04

I do love Bree. Thanks for the cheering message. I was napping when you called, and heard it this morning about 5am. Didn't reckon you'd still be up. I saved it because when I replay it, it makes me laugh. *HUGS* You are a good friend. Ah, brilliant day. I'm exhausted. I worked all morning, though I should use the term work loosely, as on Saturdays we are slow as hell and the only work involved is trying to stay awake. I was nauseated through most of the day, but was able to eat a pita and a piece of carrot cake. Yay for solid foods! After I got home, Mom and I went to see the new Bridget Jones movie, which I adored, of course. I love Bridget. There were so many funny bits, but the fountain bit had me about out of my chair I was laughing so hard. I love any scene with Colin Firth and Hugh Grant. After the movie, I called only to find out my boyfriend was on his way to Detroit, which I had known nothing about. And I was happy, because it meant I could have dinner with Mum and not rush. I forgot that not eating for a week resulting in the incredible shrinking of my stomach. I was full so fast.

11/12/04

I don't even know where to begin. I could start with my disappointment in the whole election thing. Of course, I wouldn't even know where to begin with that bullshit. Or I could start with the trip to the emergency room last Friday evening, where I spent three hours hooked up to an iv. They gave me an anti-biotic for the abscess and Vicodin for the pain of my impacted wisdom tooth. I called and made an appointment with an oral surgeon for this coming Tuesday, since they wouldn't even see me based on the infection in my mouth. Tuesday evening, I made a surprise return to the same er because I hadn't been able to keep food down and my mouth was not only more swollen, but there were sores all along my lips. Hey, you have mouth ulcers (aphthous stomatitis), have a popsicle. Since the mouth ulcers are a viral thing, I have to let them run their course, which mean I have swollen, purple lips, and when the sores break open, I gag. I can't brush my teeth, and mouthwash doesn't make them feel clean at all. I've drank a case and a half of Dasani in the last week and dropped about 15 pounds. Mihir keeps saying I look slimmer, I think he's just trying to keep me from screaming at him.

Bob called me at like 6am yesterday. What could be so damned important, I pondered. Well, I'm definitely still in shock. I don't think it's fully hit me yet. I mean, I was just with Jacob on Halloween, for God's sake. And now he's dead? It's too much. At least we were on good terms again. Or, we were in my mind anyway. I don't think now's the time to ask Ann if he said anything about Halloween night. She might sock me in the face. I should go to pay my respects and to be a friend to Ann. She was very close to him. I always forgot how young he was.

10/28/04

But I'm wired! I just got home from work, took my meds, ate some chicken and I still need to take my bath. I've talked to Shannon, Wendy, Amanda, Bob and Kristine since I left UT, which is more than the amount of friends I've talked to in the last week.

We had "the talk" last night. Good news: We're still together. Bad news: It's going to be a tad frustrating for the next few months with all the stuff that needs to get done and with him leaving in December FOR A MONTH(!!!!!!!) to go to home to India.

10/27/04

I've been on my medications for about a week and a half now. I'm not as tired all the time, and my clothes feel looser, though when I weighed myself it was about the same. My hand still tingles sometimes, and the Levoxyl is giving me some kind of acid reflux/heart burn feeling. However, overall, I am feeling much better.

I had a meeting last Wednesday to find out about the possibilty of a promotion. "At this time, we are not in the position to make the move. But we will definitely keep you updated and let you know when we are." That could be next week, or even next year. So why bother talking to me about it at all? Then I found out Toni makes about a quarter more an hour than I do. She's been there a year less and does half the work I do. I put in about 26 hours of over time last week helping out with Homecoming festivities. Carol called me today to tell me they're switching her and Crystal. I asked when we'll be making the move. If I go to South with Carol and they let Zelma move with Crystal, I'll be getting 20 hours OT minimum each week. Which I can definitely use.

Last night Shannon, Bob and I went to Amanda's to hang out. We played UNO and had jello shots and vodka lemonade. It was a good night. I'm glad I didn't punk out and go home like I had considered.

Today Bob and I went shopping and went to lunch. I bought a costume for the weekend, but when I got home I tried on my Halloween dress from last year and it fits better than it used to, so I was pretty excited about that. I'm returning what I bought today and fine tuning last year's costume. Which means I'll have to clean my closet and go to the basement to find everything.

I got my hair cut today. I keep saying I'm growing it out, but it gets kinda shaggy in the back, so I get it cut. But the front is growing, and it's getting long (long for me, considereing I've had almost boyishly short hair for the last 3 years!). My plan had been to let it grow out for the wedding, and then cut it afterwards if I felt so inclined. But things are kinda funny right now, so we'll see what happens.

10/16/04

I'm fixin' to go to bed here in a minute. I didn't go to bed until 2am, and had to be up and at work by 6:30 this morning. Then, I got to stay until 5:30 this evening. Good times. Not.

Had a great weekend at Nana's. As always, didn't really want to come back Tuesday evening, but when I saw Mihir, I was glad I was home. Bill is growing like a weed. I can't believe my baby is a senior in high school. He and Emily are going to homecoming this weekend, and he got a shirt and tie and modeled it for me since I wouldn't be there to see it. He's my favorite. Melissa, on the other hand...She always has a sarcastic word for everyone, and there were a few times this weekend I just wanted to smack her in her mouth. Uncle and I took Nana to the doctor Monday, we all went out to eat a few times, played tons of cards and I got to visit with Aunt Diane. Come to find out, she already had the operation to remove the cancer, and radiation starts next week. She looks awesome and says other than the blood clot in her leg and the diabetes she just found out about, she feels a lot better. We exhanged our new addresses, and I hope we keep in touch this time.

I went to the doctor on Thursday. As predicted, she ordered up a slew of bloodwork to be done. Since I'm such the genius, I'd been fasting since the night before because I knew a glucose test would be thrown in there (since diabetes runs in my sperm donor's family). When I went to St. Charle's, they took FIVE VIALS out of my arm. Yesterday, the doctor's office called me at work to tell me they called in my new thyroid medicine and glucophage to the pharmacy. AWESOME! So now I'm on all the meds I need to be on until November when I have my follow up. I hope I start feeling better by then.

I've been put in charge of games for a baby shower. One of our associates just had a baby girl, and a bunch of us gals are throwing a shower for her. The last baby shower I went to was my freshman year in high school, and we didn't play games, we just gave gifts. I went online last night and found a load of games that are possible, so we'll see what happens. At first, I was like, "Do you know who I am? And you still want me in charge of baby games?" Now I'm kind of excited. And I'm looking forward to seeing little Riya. Babies are cute for short periods, and after they fuss or poop, I'm cured of my "maybe I want a baby some day" syndrome.

10/8/04

Mihir and I were going to spend time together and just randomly road trip. But Jared called Mom and told her Aunt Diane has cancer (ovarian, I want to say but Mom couldn't remember, and when I called Jared to verify he was too drunk to recall). I'm waiting for my laundry to finish, getting my hair cut, oil changed, and picking up Kim since she lives halfway between here and Nana's. I'm presuming it's somewhat serious, as our evil grandmother took time out of her busy Florida retirement schedule to come to Ohio and stay with my aunt. Of course, Diane was always her favorite. Mine, too, in fact. She's the only one smart enough in that family not to get married and have kids.

Karen and Brian drunkdialed me at 4am this morning. I didn't get the messages til after 10, when I woke up. Luckily, I used my psychic abilities and turned the phone's ringer to soft so it didn't wake me up. Cause that would have been a really interesting conversation.

Mihir came over for the first time in a week last night. We sorted through a lot of stuff and I think things are better now. I love him more than ever, and I'm going to miss him these next few days.

Anyhow, I have, like, three hours to get the rest of this shit done, as I want to leave no later than 2. Everyone have a great weekend. If I miss anything fun, important or exciting, leave me a comment and point me in the right direction. *muah*

10/5/04

Feeling incredibly pissy this evening, even though I know it's stupid. But let's not talk about that.

Went out with Bob last night. Good times. I miss my Bob. Found out a Royal Flush is okay, but it's 10x better when dumped into my cherry Coke. And Mr. Beefy's cole slaw makes my insides quiver, but in that yummy, happy way.

I'm up for a promotion at work. Which is both exciting and nerve wracking. I hate the waiting. I want it, but we haven't discussed salary or when it will go into effect. I don't want to be salary again because the company works you to death if you aren't hourly.

I started taking my iron supplement and multi vitamins again today. My pee is neon yellow. It looks toxic, but in a neat way. Though, normal people get scared when their body dispels anything slightly toxic looking. Good thing I never claimed to be normal, eh?

We got our shipment yesterday. The kittens are having a fanfreakingtastic time playing with the styrofoam peanuts. Rocky is too adorable. He's getting so big, but Toby is (thankfully!) staying little. Mom thinks he'll be like Ophie and stay little. Yay!

9/27/04

Short entry as I'm due to work in a bit. Just wanted to update and say "Hi, I'm alive!" Things have been crazy busy for me lately. We went to Philly for a conference last weekend, and it was awesome. The business is going so well and bringing us closer together. That makes us both happy.

Last night was Ben's going away party. We started at Miss Cue then ended up at Skarlett's. Hilarious, let me say. An awesome night in all. Great sex followed.

The kitties are doing well. Ferris isn't sick anymore. Rocky is getting BIG, and Toby is still apunk. Much love, though, much love.

I got two $25 giftcards to Media Play in the mail last week, so I went and got season four of Angel. Naturally, I've only had the time to watch the first ep, but just knowing it's here, waiting for me makes me work that much harder to earn TV time.

Work still bites, but if I work the business right, I'll be able to retire in the next two years. How fucking awesome is that?! I'm so psyched.

Ok, gotta eat, bathe, and change over the laundry before I head to work. Hugs to all.

9/12/04

Work has been bordering between okay and sucktastic. On Friday, Carol called me on my day off and told me her boss came in and screamed at her for an hour and a half. She was crying on the phone and told me she quit and wanted me to come in and cover her shift so the place didn't go to hell before Toni came in. Which I found odd because if I were quitting I'd just walk out and be like, "Fuck you!" Don came in and told me I'd be working without a day off for the next week or more until they found a new manager. I had to hold back my laughter when I told him that wasn't happening. I'm not salary anymore. They can't MAKE me work unscheduled shifts. Plus, I'll be in Philadelphia next weekend, so there's no way I'd be able to work if I wanted to. They brought "Chef Bob" over to run the place til they get a manager, which means I'm basically in charge since he's new. Today, Carol apparently called to find out if Monday was covered because she wouldn't be able to make it in since she had to go to the doctor to find out when she can come back to work. Something about migraines. I don't really know, as I didn't get to talk to her.

I called the vet and got meds for Ferris. He seems to be doing a lot better. More energy, no more accidents on the floor. But now he makes this weird crying noise, and I do NOT like it. I'm going to have to break down and take him in, and I hate taking him to the vet because he goes effin' BALLISTIC and bites and shit. He bit my lip once when I took him, and they had to cover his head with a towel to calm him down. Rocky is getting really big, which is funny since he's the RUNT OF THE LITTER! Toby is all lovey dovey when I'm home, and if I call home to talk to mom, she puts the phone up to him. When he hears my voice he starts purring and rubbing against the phone. I left my bra on the desk the other night and he slept on it all night and morning. He's so cute.

Hugs to all my friends I haven't been in contact with recently. I apologize if I miss anything important. I've gotten a new cell phone, so for those who I may have forgotten to tell email me and I'll get it to you. I've been fighting the depression shit, and when I'm not at work, I'm with Mihir or helping Mom at I-House. She got a promotion and is the new manager, but of course, no one trained her how to do anything. I'm helping her out when I get the chance. She is kicking ass over there, but totally frustrated since she only has one supervisor under her and is working like 70+ hours a week. At least they haven't switched her to salary yet!

9/2/04

I've been having a shitty ass week. I think I may be scraping bottom, so things could start looking up anytime now. I'm not ignoring anyone, I'm not angry with anyone. I've spent the last week and a half at his place, where there is no internet connection. The funny part? I wasn't even going through withdrawals. I love you all, and I apologize for my lacking comments and whatnot. I'm just not in a good place right now, and I need to focus on getting to one. Funny thing that happened tonight: On the cell with Bob after work. I put it on speaker for a minute because I was eating ice cream. We were having a good vent session, getting stuff out, and he said something about needing some Britney. Being a good friend, I suggested the clip of Madonna and Britney kissing at last year's VMAs. Then he said, "I need to get intoxicated and go dance this erection away." Since it was on speaker, Mom heard it and snorted since she was laughing so hard, which in turn caused me to snort. Bob wasn't understanding why we were laughing so hard. I was like, "Dance your erection away?" He says, "Aggression! A-G-G-R-E-S-S-I-O-N!" Ha, my bad. Still funny.

8/24/04

As of Saturday, I am now a certified Skin Care Analyzer.

Kim came back this weekend, and promptly got into a car accident. Her car is totalled, one of the three girls ended up with amnesia, but Kim and the other girl are just scraped a bit. She met a new guy, so hopefully the whole Matt fiasco will be resolved.

Sunday was my and Mihir's anniversary. We spent it up at the hospital with Kim. When we got back to his place in the evening, he was achey. I told him to take a hot shower to relax his muscles, then I went out and got us pizza. We ate and talked and he seemed fine, until he got up to go to bed. He staggered a bit, and when I reached out to steady him, he was burning up. I stayed with him, but I was sweating just laying next to him because he was radiating so much heat! When I got up yesterday, I called him in sick to work, came home to grab work clothes, chicken noodle soup, Theraflu and Advil Flu meds. When I got home from work last night he was totally better, and I was glad. His back is still bothering him, though, and we're not sure why.

I came home this morning to do some laundry before work. Thanks, Kim, for using all my detergent and not bothering to let me know. I had about half a capful left. Just enough to do my work clothes.

Speaking of work...I hate it. I'm looking for a new job. Anyone want to hire me?

8/20/0410:18pm

I got my laundry started, I straightened the bathroom, freshened my hair and make up and changed my top. I went to the car to go to PASE and it wouldn't start. I turned the key and not even a click. Low and behold, I'd left the lights on early (you know, when it was rainy and gloomy). Mom wasn't home to jump start me. That was the straw that broke my back for the week. I called Mihir. No answer. I called Priya to tell her I'd not be making the meeting. I called Amanda. No answer. I sat on the front porch and cried. Then I called Nana and cried another half hour to forty five minutes. Bob called and invited me to a movie, but I have thirty bucks in my checking account until I get my paycheck next week. Rent is due. My car payment is due. I hate my job and want to quit (but that is NOT feasible at the moment). I want to move away. I'm so unhappy with just about every aspect of my life. I'm not quite sure how I got here, but I am sure it's my own fault somehow.

Anyway, in all the tears and frustration, I've done three loads of laundry, cleaned the bathroom and living room, and am about to start in the kitchen. Apparently, we're all hanging here tomorrow night. Which reminds me I've got to call Kari.

8/20/044:11pm

You remarkably scored 85%

You personally got 17 of the 20 people correct and were better at recognizing girls than guys. Overall, you guessed better than 94% of all test takers.

Test yours here!

Right, so I'm stealing out of Sara's LJ all the time now. But she always finds the most interesting memes and quizzes. And being friends with some of the people I'm friends with, I was curious to see how well tuned my gaydar is. It's much harder to just look at photos and guess than it is to see the actions and hear the speech.

Anyway.

It's been raining all day. Gloomy and cold and wet. It feels like late Saturday or Sunday as opposed to Friday. I went into work today for Carol to tell me I had to leave after 3 hours because Don says I can't have overtime. Even though I worked my ass off for 14 hours on Tuesday. The only reason I worked 14 hours on Tuesday was because I was told it would put me into OT for the week, which at this point I desperately need. Fuckers. No wonder I hate my job. I want to blow the place up some days, really. I really shouldn't say that, though, because someone WILL blow it up someday, and since I wrote about wanting to do it in my LJ it must be me. I left at 2:15 today as opposed to 8. Not a horrible thing, I'mjust pissed about working so long on Tuesday. Now I can get shit done around here, if I so choose. I went to see Priya and discussed tomorrow's trip and gave her a check for my ticket. Now I'm doing laundry and thinking perhaps I should clean the bathroom. I might. This house needs to be cleaned. I think it might just be easier to move into a new one.

8/19/04

Last night I was supposed to meet up with the gang, but I opted out since I was so exhausted. I took a bath and crashed on the couch. I watched Paul Hamm take the gold in the men's all around in gymnastics, which was awesome. I realized last night how much more I enjoy the winter Olympics. While I do enjoy the men's gymnastics (*purrrrrrrr*), I love figure skating so much more. The music, the costumes, the flare...Ah, to be lithe and athletic.

Haven't seen my boyfriend in two days. We've been playing the phone tag. Something is wrong with his phone, so he used his roommate's phone to call, but I was missed it cause I was in the tub. I called back, but he had left. Where he went at 10:45pm is anyone's guess, but whatever. I've got some work to do, then I'm off to bed.

I'd really like some ice cream, but we only have chocolate and vanilla. I could go for something really outrageous, something totally Ben & Jerry's. Of course, I just brushed my teeth, so I have no real plans to eat anything.

I have to work tomorrow 11 to 7:30 again. Then PASE, then home to sleep before heading to Chicago on Saturday. When I get home Saturday night, the girls should all be back. I'm so excited my girls are all back for the fall! Yay! Sunday I open, and after that, Sagar will be over at the apartment, and apparently I'm supposed to go meet him. God only knows how long that will take. Last time, when I met P.K., we were there for like 6 hours. And I got a headache and became despondent.

I'd like a new job. I dislike the one I have. In fact, I'd really like to retire and not work anymore. I hate waking up to an alarm clock every morning, I hate having to take orders from someone who has no clue about anything. I hate that I worked 7.25 hours before being allowed to take my lunch break. I really fucking hate the fact that when the soft serve machine goes into a tizzy, I'm the one everyone runs to. I've never worked with one like this before, so leave me the hell alone and fix it yourself! Grrr.

I took a forty minute bath tonight. Lots of bubbles and hot water. Shaved, pumiced, and damn I feel good.

I can't wait for my first paycheck.

8/18/04 I feel like my legs are going to fall off. I've been back to work since last Tuesday. I got forty hours last week. Yesterday, I worked 14 hours for catering. I'm going to get OT this week. Woot! We open for business tomorrow, and I'm pretty nervous. I haven't done board ops before, just retail. And Carol is a total flake who hasn't given me ANY details I need to know. I'm basically just winging it. Amanda and Shannon came in today and filled out their paperwork, and they can start Saturday. I'm so thrilled!

I'm going to Chicago Saturday. That's cool as shit.

Mihir moved into his new apartment last week. It's so much nicer than his last one. In fact, I'm not afraid to use the bathroom in his new apartment! And his roommate (yes! just one roommate!) doesn't leave dishes in the sink to get crusty and smelly and then ask when I'm coming over. And they have a shower! Aslam went out of town, so I spent the weekend at the new apartment. It was so nice to just be the two of us. It was kind of like a little glimpse into the future. He's kind of a slob, but then so am I. We'll have to hire a house keeper or something.

8/10/04

I should be asleep. I worked 11am to 7pm today, came home with a headache, rented movies with Amanda, cleaned my room, wrote in my paper journal, did two writing prompts, and I should be sleepy. I'm totally not. And tomorrow I have a long ass day ahead of me. I have to get up early, go get my ID card from Michelle, work 11 to 7, come home, change for the meeting, and then I MIGHT get home by 11pm. Unless, by some twist of fate, my boyfriend wants to spend time with me.

After Amanda left, I cleaned my room and hung up cut out photos of wedding dresses I like and vacation spots I'd like to visit. All to remind me why I go to the J-O-B. I guess it shouldn't be too bad this semester. I have a good staff, I'll be working under Carol, and board ops are TOTALLY different than retail. Change is good, right?

So why is Kelly awake at this God forsaken hour? Well, upon cleaning my room, I unearthed some kind of many-legged insect thing. I ran in the closet to get the squishing shoe, and upon my return, the little beasty had disappeared. Now I'm petrified to sleep in my bed, for fear it will crawl over me, in my ear, in my nose, or in my mouth. I'm afraid if I sleep on the couch, I won't hear my alarm and get up in the morning. Or I'll wake up with a stiff neck or a headache. Sometimes I wish I could be like the cats and sleep in any position anywhere. Oh, to commit sloth. It's my favorite deadly sin.

8/8/04

Reasons Bob is my very best friend

* It's been almost eight years and he still puts up with my shit
* He has an extra blanket and pillow ready for me whenever (and the couch is really comfy)
* He lets me use his kitchen for my late night monkey needs
* Who else keeps a toothbrush at their house for me? No one.
* He always has a story or gossip about someone (normally someone we dislike) which makes my shit seem not as big as I blow it up to be
* He knows when I'm crying, even before the tears flow
* He has more photos of me/us displayed in his home than any of my other friends or relatives
* No matter how I feel, by the time Bob's done with me, things somehow aren't as black
* He stays up til 4am watching Ron White with me, just to be sure I'll be okay
* He's been through it all with me, yet he sticks around
* A bottle of Jose Cuervo and a box of Kleenex. 'Nuff said

8/7/04

Squeeeeeeeeeeee! I just checked on my cell phone order, and it's been approved. It should be shipped in the next 24 to 48 hours, meaning I'll have my brand new cell phone no later than Wednesday! Again with the squeeeeeeeeeeee!

Went to Troy, Michigan for PASE tonight. Not too bad, though my stomach started rumbling and hurting cause I was SO HUNGRY. Then on the way out, Dinesh let me rub his hair, since it was my freebie from Wednesday. I showed him the bruises on my knees from the dance and he was shocked. It was funny. I keep telling Mihir Dinesh is his competition so he'd better treat me right. Tomorrow we have a rally in Troy to get us pumped up for FED. I think Kristin might go with me, which would rock my socks right off. I haven't hung out with her in ages, and to hang with her in this new atmosphere where I'm totally comfortable and happy...it'll be like hanging with a whole new Kelly, for sure.

I'm coloring my hair. It's been awhile. I haven't colored it since before Mihir and I started dating. I'm using L'Oreal Couleur Experte in Caramel Glaze. I stopped at Kroger on the way home and picked it up. I had wanted to get a different highlighting kit, but the selection was sparse, so I went with this. I've used it before and it turned out okay. Plus, I've been contemplating going brunette instead or the auburn everyone knows me for. I've been needing to touch up for some time, but haven't had the money. Now I have a few extra and I spend it on hair color. No wonder I'm broke all the time.

Okay, time to go rinse and get some sleep.

8/6/04

Friday Five
1. What was the first concert you ever attended? How old were you? Where was it?

My dad took me to see Aerosmith when I was 15. It was at the Toledo Sports Arena. Virginia and I wanted to go, but I wasn't allowed unless my dad went with, even though her older brother and sister were all going.

2. What was the most recent concert you attended? Where and when?

I'm pretty sure the last concert I went to would have been Poison, 2 summers ago. I saw them once at the Blossom Music Center in Cleveland, and again here in Toledo at the Seagate Centre. They were with Winger, Faster Pussycat and some other hair band I can't recall.

3. Have you ever seen your favorite artist/band in concert? Did the show live up to your expectations or were you disappointed?

Thanks to the lovely Bree I got to see Bon Jovi for my 22nd birthday. Awesome, awesome, AWESOME! I cried like a baby, and I made a collage of the (illegal) photos I took.

4. Ever been to a concert where you were pleasantly surprised at the performance? Ever been to a concert where you were totally disappointed? Name 'em!

The Guess Who show on my 23rd birthday at the zoo was pleasantly surprising. Especially when they played "American Woman."

I saw the Goo Goo Dolls downtown a few summers (like 5 or 6) ago, and it was a bit disappointing. Could have been the atmosphere, or the way Johnny Rzeznick kept stopping the show because people were MOSHING.

5. Name five bands that would headline your own personal festival. (Along the lines of Oz Fest or Lollapalooza)

1. Bon Jovi 2. Poison 3. Godsmack 4. Alter Bridge 5. Def Leppard

8/5/04

1. I have a cell phone.
2. I am obsessed with new things.
3. I am the youngest child.
4. I am a chocoholic.
5. I love my gauged ears.
6. I love clothes.
7. I love margaritas.
8. I love the weekends.
9. I can't live without lipgloss.
10. I can't live without music.
11. I lived in Tahoe.
12. I spend money I have.
13. I'll be/was in college for over 4 years.
14. I like designer wallets.
15. I get annoyed easily.
16. I eventually want kids.
17. I loved the Backstreet Boys.
18. I have more than a couple horrible memories.
19. I'm addictied to Degrassi.
20. I am a sensitive person.
21. My first kiss was unexpected.
22. I start school on Jan. 4th or 5th.
23. I love taking pictures.
24. I hate people who are fake.
25. I can be mean when I want to.
26. My dreams are bizzare.
27. I am bisexual.
28. I have way too many pairs of shoes.
29. I've seen 'She's all that' at least 50 times.
30. I dress how I feel that day.
31. I love Charmed.
32. Sometimes I cry for almost no reason.
33. I hate when people are ridiculously late.
34. I procrastinate.
35. Winter is my least favorite season.
36. I have too many clothes for my closet.
37. I love to sleep.
38. I wish I were smarter.
39. Brad Pitt is the hottest guy ever.
40. I have/make a lot of drama.
41. No one knows the full story of my life.
42. I love my hair.
43. I sometimes fight with my parents.
44. I love the beach.
45. I have had the chicken pox.
46. I'm excited for the future.
47. I can't control my emotions.
48. I can't wait till New Year's.
49. I love the show 'Newlyweds'.
50. I love my friends.
51. Christmas is my favorite holiday.
52. I can be very insecure sometimes.
53. I have had a broken bone.
54. I hate ignorant people.
55. I love my laptop.
56. I love guys that play the guitar
57. I state the obvious.
58. I am a happy person.
59. I love to dance.
60. I love to sing.
61. I hate cleaning my room.
62. I tend to get jealous very easily.
63. I like to play video games.
64. I love John Mayer.
65. I hate when I see animals/people getting hurt/abused.
66. I am a vegetarian/vegan.
67. I don't like to study for tests.
68. I love Play-Doh.
69. I am too forgiving.
70. I have a good sense of direction.
71. I like/d high school.
72. I have a talent of sweet talking my way out of things.
73. I don't drink enough to get drunk.
74. I love kisses on the forehead.
75. I love the color blue.
76. I don't sew.
77. I am not addicted to drugs.
78. I love the Olsen twins.
79. I am gonna try out for the softball team.
80. I become easily stressed.
81. I hate liars.
82. I like comfy sweatpants.
83. Bam Margera is awesome.
84. I love the smell of fresh laundry.
85. I love my family.
86. I don't mind getting shots.
87. I am a perfectionist when it comes to certain things.
88. I always wanted to learn how to play the harp.
89. I hate the feeling of failure.
90. I love hugs.
91. I would love to have my own fashion line.
92. I can be quite selfish.
93. I still act like a little kid.
94. Above all I despise dishonesty.
95. I can stay on the computer forever.
96. I love country music.
97. I wish I was more motivated when it comes to school.
98. I love getting stuff in the mail.
99. I have problems letting go of people.
100. I hate the feeling of being alone.

8/4/04

Happy 21st to Kari. I didn't post about it on Monday cause I haven't posted shit in a few days, but I left her an IM. Would have called if my cell worked in Lorain. Good thing I'm getting a new one soon. Cricket sucks my will to live.

This pissed me off like nothing else. Perhaps I'm overly sensitive. Perhaps it is bullshit. Whatever.

I promise I'll get all caught up on shit and update properly by the end of the week. Just have a whole lot of shit going on right now and am having difficulty focusing and keeping up.

Bree, I'm sorry. It sucks, and it made me cry. *hugs*

Toby has decided he enjoys shredding the Yellow Pages. What a mess that would have been to clean up. Good thing I only heard about it, as I'm at Kim's. Bwahahahaha. Poor Mom.

I have to go finish getting ready to leave.

7/31/04

Been in a pissy mood all day, so I called off work. The schedule isn't made for next week, so if he puts me on for tomorrow, I won't know since I'll be in Lansing, MI all day.

I made dinner again tonight. Enchiladas, Spanish rice, pico de gallo, bean dip and chicken fajitas. I ate too much. Of course, I hadn't eaten anything else the rest of the day.

Shannon will be in town tomorrow til Thursday, and I'm so excited. Kim is coming in tomorrow night just for the night, and I think she's bringing her boyfriend.

I'm getting a new cell phone, but I think I'm keeping my current number. We'll see how that works.

7/30/04

I've been kind of out of it lately. I haven't really wanted to be around people, or talk to people, or do much of anything. I've just felt BLAH. I haven't even been spending much time with the boyfriend. Though, now his family knows about me, and his sister calls him everyday asking a new question about his "American girlfriend" and wanting photos of me. *wrinkles her nose* I sort of feel like a freak show.

We had a supervisor meeting at work (AVI) yesterday morning. I found out instead of the I-House, I'll be working at the Crossings. Which is fine. As long as I'm out of retail and out of the Student Union, I'm happy. I'm currently planning to work my bar tending schedule around my AVI schedule and see how long I can last with both jobs. Though the bar tending hasn't been very fruitful at all. The restaurant is generally pretty dead, so if I make $20 in tips a night, I'm jumping up and down. I get so bored sitting there waiting for people to come in. I've been taking books to read, but I feel guilty reading when I'm on the clock (damn my work ethic). When I work in the back bar, I stand for 8 hours on a concrete floor. My legs have been aching all day long. It started in my feet last night. They were throbbing when I got home. Then I went to bed, and it moved up my legs. I need to remember to stop at Rite Aid on my way to PASE tonight to get something for that.

Speaking of PASE, I'm a scheduled speaker AGAIN tonight. I'll be doing a 10 minute presentation on oral care. Why oral care? Because they all love my smile and thought I'd be best suited to talk about the importance of taking care of your teeth and whatnot. Flattering, yes. I've got to run to Kinko's before the meeting to make some copies of the little thingy I put together. Look at me, all professional and stuff. I'll be printing out my business cards just as soon as I get my new cell phone. Because I thought it would be pointless printing out cards with my current number if I'm going to be switching companies and plans and will most likely end up with a new number. They're gonna look sweet as hell, too.

I should probably work out a bit now. I've been back to eating bad things late at night, so I'm gaining back the few pounds I've shed. Time to get serious.

7/27/04

I want to paint my bedroom, and maybe lay down carpet. But I don't know how to go about doing that stuff. Maybe I'll look for a community on home renovations or something. God, I wish Thom would come redecorate my home. Another reason I should have been a gay male.

I don't have shit to write about, so I thought I'd post some funny things I've been receiving via email.

Dear Tide: I'm writing to say what an excellent product you have! I've used it all through my married life, as my Mom always told me it was the best. Now that I am in my fifties, I find it even better! In fact, about a month ago,I spilled some red wine on my new white blouse. My inconsiderate and uncaring husband started to berate me about how clumsy I was, and generally started becoming a pain in the neck. One thing led to another and somehow I ended up with a lot of his blood on my white blouse. I tried to get the stain out using a bargain detergent, but it just wouldn't come out. After a quick trip to the supermarket, I purchased a bottle of liquid Tide with bleach alternative, and to my surprise and satisfaction, all of the stains came out! In fact, the stains came out so well the Detectives who came by yesterday told me that the DNA tests on my blouse were negative and then my attorney called and said that I would no longer be considered a suspect in the disappearance of my husband. What a relief! Going through menopause is bad enough without being a murder suspect! I thank you, once again, for having such a great product. Well, gotta go. I have to write a letter to the Hefty bag people.

Geography of Men and Women

Geography of a woman

Between 18 and 22, a woman is like Africa, half discovered, half wild, naturally beautiful with fertile soil.

Between 23 and 30, a woman is like America, well developed and open to trade, especially for someone with cash.

Between 31 and 35, a woman is like India, very hot, relaxed and convinced of her own beauty.

Between 36 and 40, a woman is like France, gently aging but still warm and a desirable place to visit.

Between 41 and 50, a woman is like Great Britain, with a glorious and all conquering past.

Between 51 and 60, a woman is like Yugoslavia, lost the war and haunted by past mistakes.

Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Russia, very wide and borders are now unpatrolled.

After 70, she becomes Tibet. Wildly beautiful, with a mysterious past and the wisdom of the ages....only those with an adventurous spirit and a thirst for spiritual knowledge visit there.

GEOGRAPHY OF MEN

Between 1 and 70, a man is like Iraq - ruled by a dick.

7/24/04

Reasons I love my boyfriend:

He spends the day in bed with me.
He feeds me cake.
He runs a bath for me.
He tells me I'm beautiful, even when I've got bedhead.

Our anniversary was Thursday. I had to work. He came over even though I didn't get off until 3am. He's the best. Bob, Ann and Troy came to the bar the other night to visit. Apparently I'm more amusing behind a bar.

Ah, work. Yeah, it gets better with each passing night. The tips are increasing, I'm better at making drinks, and I have a few regular customers. I need to get more white shirts, though, as right now I only really have two. And one of them is long sleeved. I work tonight. I don't want to. I'd rather stay in bed with him.

Embarassing thing happened last night. Remeber the OPD incident? Yeah, similar situation. Funny as hell, though. I'm still laughing about it.

7/22/04

Age: 25
Born On: May 21st, 1979 at 1:47 pm.
Celebrity Crush(es): Jon Bon Jovi, John Cusack, Drew Barrymore and Liv Tyler
Dream Job: Mid wife or massage therapist
Erratic Behavior: I hate going over someone's house and finding dirty dishes in the sink
Funniest Memory: Probably the Oregon Police Incident. "Ma'am, please step to the back of the car when you're decent."
Good Friends: I have a lot, but the best are Mom and Bob
Height: 5' 6¨ö"
Interesting Tidbit Nobody Knows: Everyone pretty much knows everything they need to
Job: Currently part time tending bar for sister-in-law's family's restaurant
Kindled Emotion Last Experienced: Wanting to be with someone I love with all my heart
Love Interest: Mihir, the love of my life
Movie You Last Saw: In a theater? Anchorman
Name: Kelly
Outward Appearance You Are Looking For: Doesn't really apply since I'm with Mihir now. He fits everything I've ever wanted or needed
Pet Peeve(s): Stupid crap, like people who don't use turn signals or people who stop in aisles RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU in the supermarket
Reason for Completing Survey: Bored out of my skull
Song That is Your Favorite: Probably "Wish You Were Here" by Pink Floyd or "The Reason" by Hoobastank
Television Show: Since Angel and BTVS are no more, I don't watch much tube
Underlying Phobia(s): I'm afraid of heights, spiders, and sometimes the dark.
Vision/Dream You Recently Had:Um, I haven't been having many dreams lately. The last one I remember involved my impending (did I just make that word up?) wedding
Weather You Like Best: mild and sunny
Xtreme Outfit You Own: Every top I own is pretty much super low cut cause I have a great rack. I used to have leather pants before I got fat.
Y: Y not? (I JUST realized each question is a consecutive letter of the alphabet. I think I got thrown off because some are left out. Plus it's after 7am and I haven't been to bed yet. So sue me!)
Zodiac Sign: Taurus on the gemini cusp

7/21/04

I woke up at 7:30 this morning. Alone. I had this empty feeling. I hate when he doesn't stay over.

Karen and I had tentative plans to hang out during the day yesterday, but she left a message saying she wasn't feeling well. Which worked out well, as I slept til almost 2pm! Later in the evening she was online, we talked for a bit and decided to go to Olive Garden. The food and company were outstanding, though I didn't expect anything less. Karen can hold a conversation, no doubt about that. We talked about lots of different things, and it was good. Since I hadn't eaten all day, I chowed on salad, breadsticks, and I tried the Chicken Alfredo. Good stuff. Since I got there early, I had myself a strawberry daquiri to relax, but I drank water the rest of the meal. And I skipped dessert. Yay me!

My first night at the new job! It was a Monday, it was slow as hell, but it was still fun. I got to meet some of the people I'll be working with on a regular basis, some of the regulars, and some guys who will be staying for the next month. One guy, Bill, about talked my ear off for the first 2 hours of my shift. Nice guy, rough life, lousy tipper. Mihir came up and brought me some of his birthday cake from the party I missed. (Reason #529 I have the best boyfriend ever) One of the guys, Maestro, bought me a shot to "break me in." He's excited that I'm working Thursday night because that's going to be "the true initiation." Thursdays thru Saturdays they do karaoke in the front bar, so I'm pretty psyched about that. For you locals who wanna come visit me at work, it's super easy to find. You take I-75 to the Miami St exit (exit 199A), at the first traffic light, turn right, into the Days Inn parking lot. Go into the side door, up the stairs and to the right. The place is called the Rose Garden Restaurant. If I'm not in the front (non smoking) bar, I'll be in the back (smoking) bar.

7/19/04

I've been up for over an hour already. He always wakes me before he leaves for work, and today, instead of going back to sleep, I got up and was productive. I washed the dishes from the weekend, I cleaned litter boxes, I ate breakfast, AND I talked to Josh for about 5 minutes. He's going out of town for the next few days to visit his grandparents.

I have to go to PP today, for real this time. I've been putting it off too long already. I already feel the changes in my body, and I don't like it.

Jared and Salma came over Saturday night and made Mihir and me vegetarian chili for dinner. It was so yummy. My brother is a surprisingly good cook. A man of many untapped talents, I'd say. We hung out for a good while before Salma had to go home and take a nap, as she was working third shift that night. After they left, we cuddled on the couch for a bit before getting ready to go out with Bob. The drag show wasn't as great as it normally is, but they had a guest performer from Detroit by the name of Troi Shannon. I gotta say, WOW. Incredible. I saw Natalie and her bridal party there (Nat's wedding is next weekend), and we danced our asses off between the shows. It was a good night. Mihir was tired, so he wouldn't dance with me. I told him next time we go out, he's taking an XS before so he'll be FULL of pep.

Tonight I start my new part time job. I'm tending bar for Salma's father in his restaurant. I haven't tended bar in a long ass time. I hope no one asks me for anything too hard to make. I start at 6pm and get off at 2am. Which sucks ass because Mihir's birthday party is tonight, and we both totally forgot about it when I was talking to Salma's mom. He asked me if I really needed to work this job, and I had to explain why I'm doing it. I hope I helped put it in perspective for him.

7/17/04

*sigh* I'm really happy right now. I've been reconnected with an old friend I'd fallen out of touch with. I'm hoping this time we can stay in each other's lives despite the distractions of everyday life. Mihir's birthday is Tuesday. I have no clue what to do for him. When I ask what he'd like or what he wants to do, he just kisses me and says, "I just want to be with you." *heart melts* I made him dinner last night. I made my infamous chicken stir fry and fried rice. He ate 2 platefuls, so I guess he liked it! I put some stir fry and rice in containers for Jared and Salma to take home when they come over tonight. Jared is making us vegetarian chili. I've never had anything my brother's ever cooked, so it should be delightful. They're bringing Kya, and I don't think I'm locking the cats up in my room. That should be exciting. Now would be a good time to put away my breakables.

7/14/04

I have to leave here in about 20 minutes for the open meeting. I haven't heard from Amanda, so I don't know if she's going. I've got my bracelets on, done my hair and makeup, and I've got my black tights on since I'm planning to wear a skirt. But I'm still wearing my nightshirt. I don't wanna get dressed til after I eat dinner. My head hurts. So do my abs. I took some Excedrin, so we'll see. It's probably this damn headband, but I've been told headbands are a good look on me. Beauty is pain, right?

I worked out today. Did the first half of my belly dancing DVD. I always feel ridiculous doing it, even though I'm the only one around. I know my movements look nothing like Neena's or Veena's. I also did about 60 crunches and lifted some weights. I feel good about it. Let's see if I can keep it up, though.

Mihir and I met up with Jared and Salma last night at the bar. It was a good time. We played some pool, drank some beers, and they got to know the man I'm planning to marry. Jared didn't even threaten him with the over protective bullshit he's pulled on all my other boyfriends. Mom is leaving tomorrow to go to Nana's for the weekend, so Jared and Salma will prolly come hang with me sometime this weekend. In the two years we've lived here, I've never been home alone an entire night. The idea kind of freaks me out.

07/13/04

First, I have to say, since Bree and Jesse got married, I keep forgetting to look for her new address under R instead of D.

I got some awesome stuff in the mail recently. The newlyweds sent Mihir and me our first engagement card and gift. Mihir says to me, "I suppose this means I need to gt your ring fixed so we can have a proper engagement?" We watched Bend it Like Beckham the night I got it in the mail, and it was a cute movie. Even cuter was the commentary I got throughout the movie as he tried to explain different Indian aspects to me. Thanks, you two.

I got my product sampler and catalogs in the mail yesterday and today. I love packages and envelopes of various shapes and sizes. Except bills. I hate bills.

Yesterday Kim, Amanda, Andy and I went to the zoo. I took tons of photos, and we had a great time. I got more sunburn, but not as badly as last week's. Last week's sunburn finally turned to a nice golden tan, and then began to peel away. So I feel pretty gross right now. I have pieces of skin falling away and I can't reach them as they're on my back. *shivers* I feel nasty.

Mihir got his car yesterday. A white '92 Honda Accord. All the doors and windows work, so he's one up on me. It's a really cute car, and he got a fab deal on it. I'm really excited that now I don't have to drive all the way out to Kenwood to pick him up and take him home. Not that I minded, but getting up early in the morning so he can get to work when I don't have to....it's rough. Neither one of us is a morning person. Trying to wake him up yesterday was funny. I stayed up all night talking to Kim and watching movies and doing stuff online. I made everyone apple cinnamon pancakes (from SCRATCH!), bacon and chocolate milk for breakfast. I went in to wake him up, and I had to go in three times because he kept rolling over and going back to sleep! Kim ate pancakes and said to me, "If you continue cooking and doing stuff like this, I'm moving in with you guys after you're married!" It's funny how I've changed (positively) since he and I have been together. My house is pretty much always clean now, I always have food in the fridge, and I'm losing weight, and I'm damn happy. *beams*

07/07/04

I worked a little today. By that I mean I went in, served lunch while laughing and chatting with Milosh, ate, then filled salad dressings. Then I came home. I worked like three hours or something. Woo friggin hoo. On the plus side, since I bought that shrub (Dwarf Burning Bush, for those who care) last night, I weeded both the front flower beds and mowed the lawn. Then I pulled all the weeds from the cracks in the sidewalk. The front of the house looks AWESOME. I'm calling Kim to see if she wants to come up on Sunday and help me scrape the front porch and repaint it. It looks like shit, and if I'm going to be staying here, I want it to look nice.

Tomorrow I am off. Big plans to do the back yard. I have to cut down the tree like weeds by the shed, weed along the side of the house and in the flower bed behind the porch, and mow the back. I hate mowing the back because we have a huge tree that sheds twigs everywhere, so before doing anything, I have to go on a twig hunt. Effin' annoying is what that is. I got a bit of sunburn on my shoulders and neck today, and I'm planning to get some sun tomorrow. I refuse to be the whitest white girl for the rest of the summer!

I'm about to take a bath. I'm filthy. From a distance, I look tan. Upon closer inspection, it's just dirt from the yard. After our meeting tonight, I might run to Meijer to check out what kind of sales they have on annuals. If things look shitty, I guess I'll be shopping at Frank's tomorrow. Right now, if you look at the front of the house, on the right side of the front steps I have the one bush. I want to flank it with some pretty annuals, then I want to get another burning bush for the other side of the steps and do something similar with the annuals. I'm not sure if I want to leave the dirt the way it is or put down mulch or rocks. I guess I'll priuce things out when I shop tonight. Why am I waiting so far into the season to do my planting, one may ask? Because I didn't think I'd be in the house til the end of the summer. But it looks like I'll be sticking around til he gets a job somewhere else or we get married. Whatever comes first.

07/06/0411:59pm

I totally didn't get about half my list done. I did the garbage, finished laundry, cleaned my closet and the bathroom, but I couldn't convince myself to do yardwork. And by the time I'd bathed, he called me to come over, so I never took my car in for the oil change. I did get to Meijer to buy wiper blades. Naturally, I could only find the replacement blades for the passenger side. They didn't even have BACKTAGS where the driver side blades SHOULD be. I was getting pissed. As usual, he calmed me.

He taught me a simple vegetarian dish tonight consisting of peas, tomatoes and potatoes with various spices. It was really good. Of course, I could only eat a little bit because since I've been on my diet, I've been eating less and feeling fuller faster. I washed the dishes and cleaned the sink, even tho he and one of the roommates protested. I said it was only fair. Plus, my OCD wouldn't let me be still knowing there were dishes in need of washing.

We went to Frank's, where I bought gardening gloves, weed and feed, a burning bush, and filled out an ap for part time work. We'll see how that goes.

07/06/041:33pm

Arg. I took a nap after taking him to work this morning, and now my headache is worse. Stupid neighbors and their firecrackers. I have a lot to get done and like, no time to do it. He's supposed to call me when he gets off work, and I'm supposed to go to his place so we can cook dinner for his roommates (they all take turns; today is his turn; he wants to teach me to cook some simple Indian dishes). Until then, in no particular order, I need to:

* change the garbage in my room and bathroom
* finish the laundry I started at 9am
* mow the lawn
* pull up the dead weeds
* take my bags to the Salvation Army
* get my oil changed
* get my wiper blades changed
* take a bath
* get started with "the business" we're getting into (more details on that later)
* clean the toilet
* clean my closet

I've already fed the cats and kittens, paid my cell phone bill, and done a load of clothes. Tomorrow I have to go to PP for my pap and pills.

Oh, the picnic! It was fun. I let Aslam drive my car there so I could sleep in the backseat. When we got there I was feeling rather shy because I knew so few people, but everyone was SO NICE. It was odd because when we were playing games or whatever, the girls went off into a group and the guys in another. I've always had the tendency to hang with the guys, but the girls kept saying, "Kelly, come over here with us." We played Frisbee and mock volleyball, and I learned some traditional dances. I tried a lot of Indian dishes, and they were pretty tastey. Hella spicey, but tastey. I drank a lot of water. The combination of the spices and my nerves gave me an upset tummy, though. On the way home, Aslam slept in the back, and I let Mihir drive home.

He always amazes me, and I'm so lucky to have found him.

07/05/04

What a weekend! I took Mihir to meet Nana and the rest of the family. They, of course, adore him. Mel marched in the 4th of July Parade, and afterwards, a bunch of us cooked out at Karen's. I cooked. I made baked beans, corn on the cob, made lemonade and strawberry shortcake, and I made the marinade for the chicken. Mr. Bob grilled the dogs (PORKLESS!), burgers and chicken for me. Everyone was impressed with my sudden domestic skills, and everyone kept commenting that they've never seen me so happy. It was a really great day, and it made my heart sing.

We're going to Chicago tomorrow for some picnic. Never been to Chicago. Never met these people we're going to hang out with. Very nervous.

We went to Kroger about an hour ago to get chicken to take with us tomorrow. On the way out to the parking lot, he stopped, turned and said to me, "You are looking so beautiful tonight." Then took out his camera phone and snapped a photo. God, I love that man.

6/29/04

Sorry, I've been seriously slacking ont he updating and keeping up on journals. I've been a busy gal. Making calls, being giddy, fixing my car.

After the best weekend I've ever freakin' had in my life, I got up Monday (alone) to go to work. When I walked out the door I noticed the back door window on the driver's side was smashed to hell. I walked around the perimeter of the car and saw no other damage, then I crawled in the car and noticed my CD player was missing. Someone fucking busted out my BACK window, crawled in the car, stole my CD player (and later I realized they stole my book of CDs as well), got back out AND LOCKED THE DOORS. The hell?! The kicker? The Cd player was a Sony Discman from like 1998.
And I totally wasn't pissed. I've been in such a good mood and so ridiculously happy, I couldn't even be mad. irritated, of course. Mad, not really. I was pretty irritated today when the guy came out to replace the window and I found out my insurance deductible is $500. So i had to pay the $187 out of pocket. Sucktastic.

Mihir and Bob met yesterday. Bob gave me my birthday pressie, FINALLY! He got me a gorgeous Italian charm bracelet with a Yin Yang charm. Hooray. My Bob always comes through for me. Tonight he made us baked penne and I brought red wine. But then he ended up watching Chloe, so we're drinking that carb free Pepsi, which is surprisingly good. Chloe is really cute. I keep playing with her teenty toes. I think I'm being swayed......

Called Jared and Salma today to share the exciting news. Jared first asked if it was for a green card, then whether ot not I wanted him to tell dad. I said, "One racial remark and I'll shoot the bastard in the kneecaps." So far everyone has been really happy for me. At least, the ones who BELIEVE me. Kim thinks I'm trying to punk her. Heh.

6/27/04

Last night was perfect. More than perfect. The most romantic evening I've ever experienced in my years of dating.
We got there about 11pm, checked out about noon, then we got food, and I just got back from dropping him off. All in all, we just spent seventeen hours together, and we're not sick of one another. I think that's a first for me. He made me a mixed CD and wrote an inscription on the disk, and it totally made my heart mushy. We talked about everything, made plans, and when I told him mom and I aren't moving as soon as we planned, he got the happiest look on his face. He's concerned about my relationship with my father and cannot fathom not inviting him to the wedding. Mom's like, "I don't want to tell you you're moving too fast." I've never understood til now that you can't put a timeframe on emotions. In past relationships I've always been like, "Ok, I can't say I love you intil such and such date, and we can't have sex til this day," blah, blah, blah. But you can't stop or change how you feel about someone. And if it makes you happy, then why should anyone else judge it?

Now I have to unpack all my boxes and reaarange my room. I have so much cleaning to do today, and all I really want is to lay down. Mom and I dedcided to stay in Toledo, if only for a hort while longer. Just until we've got more money set aside for a move and we're sure we'll have jobs. Because Todd is totally dicking me around about transfering.

My roses look so pretty. I should crush some aspirin and put it in the water so they last longer.

Wow. I really do not want to clean this house.

6/26/04

When I called to book the suite for tonight, I had to give my name. When the lady typed it in, not only did MY name pop up, but my brother's name was tagged on as well. She says, "Kelly and Jared?" and I was like, "uh, hell no."

When Jared and Salma had their one year anniversary, I booked a heart shaped jacuzzi suite for them. I used a credit card, so it was in MY name, and I had them put Jared on there because he and Salma would be checking in. I guess that kind of stuff haunts you forever.

She's taking my information, and while she's waiting for the computer to process, she says, "So you don't want me to come in after check-in and say, 'Hi, Kelly and Jared'?" I laughed. I like staying somewhere people have senses of humor as opposed to pencilled in eyebrows and bad attitudes.

6/25/04

We went to see The Terminal last night. It wasn't bad, and it had some cute parts, but all throughout the movie I had the overwhelming urge to slap Catherine Zeta-Jones' character, and I wanted to beat the hell out of Stanley Tucci's character. Surprisingly, I didn't cry. Normally, I sob at movies. I'm a very emotional person.

After the movie we went to the bay again. But it was freezing! We had blankets, but the sky was cloudy so we didn't see any stars. The waves were crashing hard, and though it was romantic, Tuesday night's setting was much better. He says the sweetest things to me and makes me feel giddy. Last night he says to me, "I'd never have imagined this could happen." And when I asked him what he meant, he said, "I've had a crush on you for some time. I never thought we'd actually be together." My heart totally melted. When I'm with him, I don't feel the nagging insecurities I normally feel. We can talk about anything, and I'm learning a lot about his culture and where he's from. He's going to start teaching me to speak Hindi, which will be really cool.

I have gotten little to no sleep all week. Today I came home and napped from about 4 til 8:30, then I got up, cleaned the bathroom, cleaned my room, took the bags of stuffed animals and clothes I'm giving to charity and put them in my car, and now I'm ready for bed. Except I need to take a bath.

I let the kittens roam out of the bedroom on their own today. They're so cute the way they check everything out, and Toby reminds me of a wind-up toy when he runs. Too cute.

6/17/04

Big Thanks to John. You're my buttermilk, baby.