I thought I had found the perfect friend,
But it only took about a week for that to end,
I thought there was hope left in my life,
But as it turns out, it was only added strife,
I thought for once I had done something right,
But I quickly corrected that oversight,
I thought I wasn’t useless or a bore,
But I was all that and even more,
I thought there was a purpose to my days,
But that was only a very short phase,
I thought you weren’t like all the rest,
But like those before, you failed the test,
I thought you would stay with me, at least for a bit,
But you decided it was better just to quit,
I thought life was worth living for a moment in time,
But the life I wanted could never be mine,
I thought the hunger inside had been fed,
But now I know, I was just being misled.
And now I think I’ve found another perfect friend,
How long before my heart is broken again?

"NO FRIEND AT ALL"

~I once had a friend, who was a wonderful girl
Being her friend was like haveing a bright, new pearl
She was the best, she was so much fun
But then one day she decided that she was done
She would not talk, She would not play
So I was left alone, left alone all day
To tell her how i felt.. Well i didn't have the guts
Yet everyday the pain got worse like big paper cuts
This girl would get mad even when i would try to call
I had a friend, A really nice friend, a friend that was no friend at all

WE ONCE WERE ONE

The day that we first met,
in my mind I still see,
you sitting in the lunch room, looking for some company.
I alone myself, sat down with you that day,
neither of us knowing what the hell to say.
But we got through the awkward times, and quickly came to be,
the best of friends to eachother, we could ever be.
The closer we grew, the more we left, the other world behind,
just me and you we jumped into a new place totally blind.
We prayed together our friendship forever, and always would stay the same,
but time has passed, only memories last, and little friendship remains.
WE ONCE WERE ONE! I screamed at you, I want my best friend back!
But we both realized at once it was that bond we lacked.
You think it doesn't hurt me, to see us back to two, looking to my left and right to see there is no you.
But we both are moving on now, lets do it gracefully, I hope our friendship still lives on in you memory.

WALKING AS ANGELS

We laid back and let it all flow out
the topic of trust never once had a doubt,
for within my mind and heart as well
was an image and vibe as clear as a bell.
You were very special to me and more
I had a feeling inside I never felt before.
A trust so great and strong
I wanted this trust to take away all the wrong
and return to me a mended soul.
My mended soul would then release a new angel beside the other one
and together we would stroll the heavens,
our times are over and done.
For we have then won the battle within
and now we rest for created we have a personality twin,
Think alike, talk alike, say the same thing.

FRIENDSHIPS LOST

I see your smile
I know your mind
No words need be said
I understand.

Focused on each other
We listen and we care
Laughter ripples like water
Together, we are.

Others are here, yes,
And we value them, yes,
But a special bond remains,
A line between us two.

Each friendship is special
Each is unique
And so is ours
We know.

And then time begins to roll
and rear it’s ugly head
Change begins
Now a little less than before.

Slowly, surely,
Not knowing why
Faster, stronger, without care
Our world shifts and shimmers and splits.

Shattered shards cascade down
Spurred by angry, lashing words
Contorted faces, stone deaf ears
Outside the whirlwind,
We die inside.

The scars run deep
Jagged clefts in our souls
We have suceeded in hurting
And hurt ourselves.

So you move on
And I remain
We keep on living
Turn our faces apart.

Now I glance across
At you from outside
Shaded eyes dry with tears
New friends, new life.

Laughter, smiling (clenched teeth)
The flippant toss of the head
The enclosure surrounds you
I cannot come near.

From behind my glass window
I know more than those within
I see the hurt in your eyes
I know the pain in your smile
I have been there before - I love you
Why do you pretend?

I hate to see your pain
And I cry inside
Tears deep within my soul
I cannot help you anymore.

What we had once
We can never have again.

The scars run deep,
But I still care.
You were my friend.

FRIENDS NO LONGER

Sorry I forgot to tell you
That as my friend you must be true.

As that I went to say,
No more were we at play.

I meant to tell you the future looked bright,
But all of a sudden we got in a fight.

I went to tell you we should be friends,
That I will be here untill the end.

But you would not listen to me,
So friends no longer shall we be.

LEAVING YOU

Leaving you will be so hard
I know that we will be scarred.
Through the years we have grown up
Now we are about to split up.
It hurts me inside
To know that you will confide
In someone else who isn't me
But they will never be what I try to be.
I'll always be there for you
And I'll always stay true.
You are a part of me
That everyone will see.
You are my sister and friend
And we'll be that way until the end.
Don't ever let anyone take my place
Because they will never face
All the times that we've shared
Even when we never really cared.
All our memories will be locked up tight
Even all our stupid fights.
The laughs, the tears, the cries, the fears
Have built up through the years.
I'll never let us be apart
And you will always remain in my heart.

NO CLUE

MY TOP FRIEND, MY ONLY SISTER
WE WERE ALWAYS TOGETHER BUT NOW I MISS HER
HAVING SUCH A CLOSE FRIENDHSIP, IT'S HARD TO LET HER GO.
SHE'S LEAVING US ALL AND DOESN'T EVEN KNOW.
HE'S SWEPT HER OFF HER OWN TWO FEET.
WHEN I WALK INTO HER HOUSE SHE NVER THERE TO GREET.
SHE'S NEVER HOMW AND BLOWS THE GOOD TIMES AWAY.
IT MAKES ME MAD, BUT IT'S STILL THOUGHT ABOUT NIGHT AFTER DAY.
I HAVE HAD THE PATIENCE TO TALK TO HER, BUT HER HEART IS GONE
SHE ROLLS HER EYES AND DENIES THAT NONE OF THIS IS GOING ON.
HER WEEKEND NIGHTS ARE SPENT DIFFERENT THEN MINE.
PROVED SHE'S CHANGED BUT ONLY THE FIRST SIGN.
ALL FRIENDSHIPS HAVE THIER BAD AND GOOD.
OURS WAS DIFFERENT... IT NEVER WOULD.
MANY YEARS AGO WE FOUGHT THROUGH THE SAME HASSLES.
THOUGH, I THOUGHT WE'D BE TOGETHER TILL THE DAY WE BOUGHT OUR TASSELS.
MAYBE WE WILL. AT THIS TIMES NO ONE'S TO KNOW.
I'LL UNITE THE BOND WE SHARED AND WATCH HER GO.
THERE'S NOT MUCH I CAN DO OR BEGIN TO SAY.
BUT I AM SO SURE WE'LL MEET UP SOME OTHER DAY

A FRIEND’S EXISTENCE

Will you remember all the days
when I was there with you,
remembering my smile and my laughter?

Or will you forget
and dwell in the lost instead,
mourning for your friend’s farewell?

A portrait of my existence
lies deep within your heart,
cherishing the memories we once shared.

Or will you decide
nothing is worth keeping,
losing the special dream you once held?

Love will never die.
Love is deep inside.
Friendships are forever.
Remember my love for you.

I am always there,
watching over you.
To give inspiration
and strength when you may fail
in a world of fears.

Will you continue to dream
and breathe the wonders of life,
striving to be who you want to be?

Or will you succumb
to the defeats in life,
failing to never overcome?
Dreams will never die.
Strength is deep inside.
Friendships are forever.
Remember my faith in you.

I am always there,
believing in you.
To give encouragement
and love when you may fail
in a world of fears.

FOREVER SEALED YESTERDAY

Understand
the wave of sorrows
flowing through
Life’s many rivers

Listen to
the sound of sad teardrops

Realize
the rain of sadness
weeping with
Love’s many heartaches

Feel the tide
of wanting a true love

The ocean is full and wide
Treasures everywhere
Lakes and seas will join together as one

Accept Love’s
truest form,
Pure since Time’s first beginning

Renew Life’s
promises,
Unbroken until Time’s death

Remember
Childhood vows
forever sealed yesterday

Cherished words
Never will fade
Impressions will always stay

Motivate
the search for tomorrows
streaming through
Life’s different waters

Listen to
the sound of new heartbeats

Visualize
the cries of laughter
smiling with
Love’s different bondings

Feel the joy
of living a romance

The world is full and wide
Treasures everywhere
Hope and faith will join together as one

Remember
Childhood vows
forever sealed yesterday

Cherished words
Never will fade
Impressions will always stay

REMEMBER

As I sit alone
With the warm sun on my back
I realise something’s missing
A part of me which lacks.

Could it be the trees,
Reaching for the sky?
Or could it be the children,
Walking home, who pass me by?

Perhaps, I miss the birds,
Chirping sweetly above my head?
All I feel is restlessness
A part of me is dead.

I know now what it is.
Now I realise what is wrong.
It’s the feeling, they call solitude,
All my friends are gone.

Of course I know,
That as we grow,
We have to make our way,
We all must plot a different course,
To go by everyday.

I always thought my friendships,
Would be round,
Just like the moon
But you see,
I am not ready,
For it all to end so soon.

I miss their happy laughter,
Floating on the wind.
I miss the many secrets,
That circulate within.

The only way to keep,
Our friendships woven tight,
Is to keep in contact always,
And then we’ll be alright!

WHAT IF?

Friends tell you their secrets
Friends are meant to share
Friends are meant to cheer you up,
What happens when they’re not there?

Is it hard when you don’t have
Someone to lean upon?
When you need a friend to care,
but they, your friends, have gone?

What if you were split
Up from your best friend?
Do you think you’d care
If your friendship ends?

Would you slowly drift apart,
Go in separate ways?
Or would you both grow closer
Grow closer day by day?

What if your friends started
Saying things behind your back?
Would you stand and face them,
Or would your courage lack?

Perhaps it would be safer
To let your friendships mend,
Push these thoughts behind you,
And make the questions end.

GOOD TIMES/BAD TIMES

Many broken pieces
Shattered, now apart
What can I do to mend it?
To mend by broken heart?

I walk along the beach
Leaving footprints cold and bare
How can I enjoy the sunset,
When there’s no one here to share?

There used to be a pair,
Of footprints next to mine.
But they washed away with waves
And the shifting sands of time.

All I can do now,
Is remember how things were.
The good times, not the bad times,
Which caused my heart to stir.

To live to die,
What does it matter?
While I am in this state.
I didn’t know how much I loved,
Until it was too late.

TOGETHER

Together,
Within a smudge of blue,
I walk the footpath.

Together,
With only ourselves in a group,
We are content.

Together,
We talk about the important things
Of our lives.

Together,
We are somehow complete,
Needing no-one else.

Together,
We hear the voice behind us,
Interrupting our private world.

Together,
As if one person, we glance back,
Seeing the face that spoke.

Together,
We try to accommodate the person,
Losing the closeness we had.

Together,
The conversation we make
Is of mindless events.

Together no longer,
We become smatters of blue
That once made a beautiful smudge.

I CAN SEE THE PAIN

I still see your face in my dreams
It hurts and it doesn't help at all
I still want you in my life as crazy as that seems
I want you to catch me when I fall

I still remember the first time we met
There was something so different about you
Your friendship was something I wanted to get
That smile when you said hi to me was so new

Out of no where you called me on the phone
I wanted to sit there and talk to you forever
You were so new, so crazy and unknown
I just knew that our friendship would never sever

Two years and we are barely holding it together
What happened to the way this all used to be
I never wanted you out of my like ever
I sat there for a long time pretending not to see

We decided to go out and make it all all right
It didn't work out of course we knew it couldn't
We couldn't even really stand each others sight
It shouldn't end this way but it did and I shouldn't

I miss you and everything you were to me
Ten years from now we will look back on it all
We will be older and finally be able to see
That love will stand the test of time and never fall

The Forever Friend

On my own, but mostly the savannah,
Where the tumbleweeds fade away and die,
Before the glassy sun burns a summer of crystals,
The glistering waters of the high seas
Of which was so far a place as of where vultures roam.
I looked around but you weren't anywhere...
You used to say that you would never die,
But I took the wrong meaning into my heart.
Now the sea is wild with despair,
Deep blue like a prairie of flowers blue,
Where all children of God rest in eternal peace.
I saw you at the end,
You and I, brother and sister of nature,
Brother and sister of heaven and earth,
Your usually calm and heavenly eyes full of tears,
Bitterly falling one after one into a river,
Then the river of life turned red in blood.
My eyes watched in horror.
Slowly and deadly your heart became poisoned,
You disappeared without saying good-bye,
Not a word came out of your mouth.
You became like desolation in its grave.
When once the skies were a realm of stars
And the sun shone brightly in summer skies,
You were there to share the calmness;
But now I stand here in midst of the tall grass
And only the savannah remains.

Lost And Found

There is a storm in my heart
It tears my inside apart
I am bleeding and I am hurt
Like a wingless little bird

Then it turns dark
And for a moment I see
The pain that was inside of me
And on a journey I embark

In search of answers
In search of truth
In search of understanding
In search of you

My guiding star in darkness
Like a little stream in the desert
Everything about you seems flawless
But that is what causes the hurt

Your perfect features do not belong to me
You do not deserve my chains
You need to live and see
What it means to be free

So spread your wings and fly away
For I can not fulfill your dream
But if you should fall one day
I'll guide you and be that little stream

So go and discover it all
And know that wherever you go
Whatever you do and might feel
The only thing you need to do is call

You Were Always There

Whenever I needed someone to talk to
You were always there.
My eyes filled with tears, my heart filled with pain, and
You were always there.
There was no time when I had doubt
to come to you because
You were always there.
I could see in your eyes you wanted to help, and that you really cared.

Whenever I was down and blue
You were always there.
No matter my problems, are what was wrong
You were always there.
Whenever I felt like nothing matters
You were always there.

Now your gone, and I don't know what to do
I close my eyes and think of you, and how
You were always there.
It's hard to look at the pictures, and get memories of you
Can you hear me now
At night I pray, and I speak to you
I guess you were right when you told me no matter how far you were
You would always be there.
I know one day I'll see you again, but till then I have to say goodbye

Even though it hurts to hear your name, and speak of you
One thing I will always say is
You were always there.

For Almie

Just by the thought of you
I find myself all sad again.
I've lost you, but also gained.
I know I must be grateful,
but my soul is sad for you.

I'll remember you always
for the good you have done,
for the seed you have sown,
for the faith you have given me
and for the example you set.

Yet, I find myself all sad again,
in my thoughts,
in my joys.
My thoughts are closed,
cause you don't look there anymore.

The season is over and
I know I must be happy
but the loss is too big
and the pain too intense.
I need to tell you my new story,
see your eyes,
experience your smile
and taste the tea we usually drink.

I just so much wish
you could see the harvest of my life
from the seeds you have sown!
Especially now, when it's full in harvest -
I know your soul would have smiled.

But then again, although I'm sad -
I know I'm glad -
cause I know I've saved you.
I'll rest my heart in that . . .

Left Alone In The Past

Left alone in the past
Forgotten friendships buried, never meant to last
She walked away from me
Why couldn't I foresee?
Time standing still
Another way to deal, another pill
The sky is gray with hate
One thing tore us apart, your fate
Now what will you do?
Who will confide in you?
Remember the times we shared?
Remember how well we paired?
The consequences are tough
You only knew how to treat me rough
Who is next in line?
Will you, too, break their spine?
Look at what you've done
This time I will stand in front of you, I won't run
Don't bother me anymore
All you touch, you tore
What you wanted, you took
Now I glance back, I take one last look
You left me alone in your past
Forgotten friendships buried, never meant to last

My Best Friend

Once was here
now is gone
I will always
love forever
the laughs
the tears
the smiles
without her
my life has no direction
no ups nor downs
no smiles or frowns
I miss her
I cry
I see her
I lie
what ever went wrong
I can mend
I will always
love forever
my very best friend

Goodbye

Well maybe now I should just say goodbye
You used to be my friend
But I never felt I really was yours
So maybe this is the end.
I'm different from you, all of you
Each other we've never understood
I hope that if I do tell you goodbye
That it won't be for good.
Whenever I'm mad it hurts me so bad
And you don't even care
I don't know why, I just want to cry
And someday I won't be there.
The streaks on my arm they've done me no harm
They're only made of pen
But once they are blood that turns brown like mud
They'll be there again and again.
If I'm mad at you I'll hurt myself too
But that doesn't really matter
Although when I hurt I feel like dirt
And my spirit's bruised and battered.
I do not know why it has to be so
I really wish it did not
But the way this has been going
it is basically shot.
You don't need me and we don't need we
And that's how I think I know why
These words are the ones I have to speak-
I love you, but goodbye.

Reaching

I reached out for your hand
You didn't seem to care;
You can only reach so far
When no one else is there.

Others also reached for you
Hoping to make you see;
That we're just as important
As he will ever be.

We wish we could reach further
But we are only so strong;
We hoped your eyes would open
So that you'd see you're wrong.

It hurts to have to reach far
When you once were so near;
It's hard shouting out for you
With our voices you don't hear.

We wish you'd extend your hand
And sense the friendship there;
Knowing what our memories mean
Showing us you still care.

We realize you don't reach back
Instead his hands with yours;
You can't handle both the worlds
So you close common doors.

We're done reaching for the past
You are now on your own;
We hope he is all worth it,
Without him you're alone.

Flowers

It may not be the same,
But some things never change.
I feel it and I trust it,
I still believe in forever
Because that's what my heart knows.

Memories are the dew drops on our petals
That re-open the buds that have closed.
Flowers wilt as seasons change,
Though they grow a little more with rain.

The sun will shine when in need,
And left behind, a precious seed.

Losing A Piece Of My Soul

I came to you the hour I was in pain
Looking for answers, I cried to you in vain.

I shared the many skeletons hiding in my heart,
I knew then you'd be my friend,
I knew it from the start.

Troubles ran like rivers, flowing through my life,
You picked the pieces up and help me through my strife.

When home wasn't home to me no more,
You opened up your heart, and opened up the door.

We cried into night until the early morn.
We solaced each other's pain and shared our many thorns.

As time flew, the air grew thick,
I saw our friendship fading, and my heart grew sick.

The day had arrived,
When it was time to say goodbye.

Now I sit alone,
reminiscing the past I'd blown.

Friends

You fell in love, friends went away,
Knowing you'd have a closer friend one day.
I thought that friend would always be me -
Things have changed, as we can see.
You'll fall in love again one day,
Then once again your friends will go away

Maybe Not Forever

There are so many stories I still want to tell
There are so many I love you's left unsaid
There are many tears left uncried
There are many dreams left to fall apart

I miss our long talks
I miss the nights when all was alright
I love you like a sister, you were my angel,
Yet I wonder why you left me here to die

We were forever best friends-
When one fell to the ground
The other one was there to help her back up.
We healed our broken hearts
With a hug and a gentle smile.
We stayed up every night looking at the stars,
Giggling like little girls and having midnight talks.

You said you had to go-
I wished it wasn't so.
You said we'd always write.
You said it would be like old times.
I looked in your eyes as you looked into mine,
With smiles like everything was fine.

Yet we both knew well that this was our last good-bye.
We knew that we would never again
Have those long talks and play like little girls again.
We knew all the pain we'd cause ourselves.
I also knew that my angel was being taken away,
Yet we promised no matter what we'd remain forever best friends

And Where Were You?

I never thought I'd see this day,
I never thought I'd feel this way,
You...a stranger to me now.
I'm left with emptiness...
I wish I knew how it could be,
That we were once so open and free.
You were like my brother.. yet so much more
I wish I would have seen what I see now before.
For, I did not and it's too late...
My friend, my lover once, is now unknown.
And what hurts the most is I now know..
What I lost.. and I'm alone.
To face a challenge life has sent,
And not a moment with you I've spent.
I hope one day I can forgive you, my friend..
I miss you....
Why did you go?

I Can See The Pain

I still see your face in my dreams
It hurts and it doesn't help at all
I still want you in my life as crazy as that seems
I want you to catch me when I fall

I still remember the first time we met
There was something so different about you
Your friendship was something I wanted to get
That smile when you said hi to me was so new

Out of no where you called me on the phone
I wanted to sit there and talk to you forever
You were so new, so crazy and unknown
I just knew that our friendship would never sever

Two years and we are barely holding it together
What happened to the way this all used to be
I never wanted you out of my like ever
I sat there for a long time pretending not to see

We decided to go out and make it all all right
It didn't work out of course we knew it couldn't
We couldn't even really stand each others sight
It shouldn't end this way but it did and I shouldn't

I miss you and everything you were to me
Ten years from now we will look back on it all
We will be older and finally be able to see
That love will stand the test of time and never fall

The Forever Friend

On my own, but mostly the savannah,
Where the tumbleweeds fade away and die,
Before the glassy sun burns a summer of crystals,
The glistering waters of the high seas
Of which was so far a place as of where vultures roam.
I looked around but you weren't anywhere...
You used to say that you would never die,
But I took the wrong meaning into my heart.
Now the sea is wild with despair,
Deep blue like a prairie of flowers blue,
Where all children of God rest in eternal peace.
I saw you at the end,
You and I, brother and sister of nature,
Brother and sister of heaven and earth,
Your usually calm and heavenly eyes full of tears,
Bitterly falling one after one into a river,
Then the river of life turned red in blood.
My eyes watched in horror.
Slowly and deadly your heart became poisoned,
You disappeared without saying good-bye,
Not a word came out of your mouth.
You became like desolation in its grave.
When once the skies were a realm of stars
And the sun shone brightly in summer skies,
You were there to share the calmness;
But now I stand here in midst of the tall grass
And only the savannah remains.

Lost And Found

There is a storm in my heart
It tears my inside apart
I am bleeding and I am hurt
Like a wingless little bird

Then it turns dark
And for a moment I see
The pain that was inside of me
And on a journey I embark

In search of answers
In search of truth
In search of understanding
In search of you

My guiding star in darkness
Like a little stream in the desert
Everything about you seems flawless
But that is what causes the hurt

Your perfect features do not belong to me
You do not deserve my chains
You need to live and see
What it means to be free

So spread your wings and fly away
For I can not fulfill your dream
But if you should fall one day
I'll guide you and be that little stream

So go and discover it all
And know that wherever you go
Whatever you do and might feel
The only thing you need to do is call

Betrayal

An echo fades into the night,
an eerie mournful sound.
A shooting star disappears from sight,
and I crumble to the ground.
There is no life within this garden;
my sobs are the only sound.
I have poisoned the honeyed fountain
where your love could be found.

Dazed, I stare at the stars above,
my grieving howls fill the night!
Unintended betrayal of love
has hidden you from my sight.
I remember how it used to be
when we shared our fears and delights.
You are a treasured friend to me.
How can I make things right?

Feeling afraid, cold and lonely,
I long to tell you how I feel,
but you don’t want to hear me.
The pain for you is much too real.
Should I back away and build a wall
and block away how I feel?
Or, should I give you a call?
We both need some time to heal.

An echo fades into the night
as our friendship disappears.
How do I know what is right?
How can I ease my fears?
If I do call you again,
would the old wounds reappear?
I can’t stand to cause you pain.
Hurting you again is my worst fear!

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