Disclaimer... The end! Oops, I mean, I don't know, this is fiction.


        "Hey!" Justin bounded up eagerly to Lance as Lance sat in their little corner, reading. It was the day after Christmas, around noon, and Justin had gone with Danny to go check on the planes. "Guess what!"
        Lance shrugged and put his book away. "We're getting out of here?" he suggested.
        Justin frowned. "Damn it, Lance, how do you do that?"
        Lance stabbed at the window at a plane that was getting ready to taxi. "I watched out the window."
        Justin followed Lance's gaze, then laughed and shook his head. "Well, you're right. Your plane leaves in an hour, and mine in twenty minutes. So get up off your butt and let's go! We're going home!"
        Lance laughed and gathered his things, pausing to study Justin's beautiful features. After Justin had fallen asleep in his arms, Lance had fallen asleep as well, and they stayed that way until almost 9 a.m, when Justin woke up. Justin left to go get coffee, Lance woke up and found Justin not there so he started to panic, and then Justin came back with two cups of coffee and Lance first smacked him on the back of his head, then hugged him, and Justin pulled him into his arms as they chatted and laughed together easily. Then, around 11:30, Justin went to go find out about the planes, and he was just now coming back. As much as Lance wanted to get home, he had to admit one thing.
        This was the best Christmas ever.
        Justin flashed Lance a charming grin and practically dragged him to the other side of the airport, where his plane was leaving from. They were already boarding, people pushing and shoving to try and get on board, so Justin simply sat down and waited. He was first class anyway, so it didn't matter.
        Ten minutes later, the terminal was practically empty, and Justin had to leave. They both stood and faced each other, Justin looking almost sick to his stomach.
        "Be careful, okay?" Justin warned, nibbling his lower lip. "Call me as soon as you get in, and if something happens to your plane..." He trailed off and rubbed his forehead, then looked up. "Lance, you are my best friend and I love you."
        Lance's eyes widened and he stared at Justin, frowning slightly. "Justin, nothing's going to happen to my plane," he reassured him. "And I love you too. But don't worry. And yes, I'll call your cell phone as soon as I get home, okay?"
        Slowly Justin nodded. "Take care, Lance."
        "You too, Justin. Now go." Lance hugged him quickly and then stepped back, feeling like his heart was bleeding. "I'll see you in a few days."
        Justin smiled sadly. "Okay. Bye Lance. Have a nice trip home." He turned, handed the woman her ticket, and then started down the terminal.
        Joey's words and earnest eyes flashed into Lance's mind. "You say that when you're saying goodbye to Justin," Joey had warned. Joey had been right. It was almost impossible to say goodbye. It ached in ways Lance didn't know existed, and loneliness began to settle in, a loss so great that it choked and strangled him. He had to get to Justin.
        "Justin!" Lance shouted desperately, feeling his heart crying. He wasn't sure what he was going to do or say when he reached Justin again, but he had to be with him one last time; look into those blue eyes one more time.
        Justin turned back, those blue eyes bright, and Lance shoved past the attendants that tried to keep him at bay. Justin stepped back towards Lance, and Lance rushed at him, throwing his arms around Justin's neck and hugging him tightly. Justin's own arms around Lance's waist were tight and firm; a secure grip.
        "Take care," Lance whispered, feeling tears sting at his eyes.
        "Come with me," Justin whispered back, and when Lance tried to pull away to look at him with wide eyes, Justin held him tighter. "Come home with me. Spend Christmas with me."
        Lance closed his eyes. "I can't," he refused, his voice broken.
        Justin dropped his head to Lance's shoulder. "I know," he whispered, his voice sounding hoarse. "I don't want you to go. I don't want to go. Stay with me," he pleaded. "We'll go anyplace. It doesn't matter where."
        Lance couldn't help the tears that slipped down his cheeks. They were going to be apart for a few days, he swore at himself, not a year! "You have no idea how much I'd love to," Lance breathed, his voice wavering. "But we can't."
        Justin sniffed, and Lance realized that Justin was crying, too. "I can't ask again, Lance," Justin told him, choking on a sob. "I'm already torn too much."
        Lance pursed his lips, his eyes rolling upwards to try and repress his tears. "So am I," Lance whispered back hoarsely. "I love you, Justin."
        "I love you, too." The answer came back automatically, but it wasn't without thought and sincerity. Justin meant it. Justin never said anything he didn't mean.
        That helped to give Lance courage, and he somehow pulled away and took Justin by the shoulders, looking up into those wet blue eyes that were crying freely. And then, after a hesitation, Lance leaned up and gently pressed his lips against Justin's cheek. It was a long, lingering kiss, and when it was over, Justin's blue eyes were bright, and his lips turned into a smile.
        "You'll have one of those waiting for me when we meet again?" Justin asked.
        Lance smiled, blushing slightly. "I'll have a million of them."
        Justin gently kissed Lance's forehead, and then spoke with his mouth dangling precariously close to Lance's. "So will I," he promised softly, and then somehow they released each other, their hands interlocked until Justin was too far away, and Lance stared after him, slowly turning to look up at the terminal, where Danny and Ramond looked back at him, tears in their eyes. They were blocking the entrance to keep anyone from seeing, and Lance silently made a note to raise their pay to ungodly heights.
        Lance hesitated, looking back at the way Justin had disappeared from, and then let out a soft curse and hurried up to the terminal and to his own plane.
        How it was possible that Justin wasn't gay, Lance didn't know, but he suddenly wasn't sure if Justin was telling the truth anymore.

        Lance's conversation with Justin as soon as he got home was short and to the point. They were both safe, and now assured of that fact, they wanted to enjoy their time home with their families.
        "Mom!" Lance exclaimed happily, throwing his arms around her as she opened up the door. Diane staggered a few steps, and then hugged him back tightly.
        "Hi," she greeted, sniffing happily. "Welcome home, baby."
        Lance laughed and squeezed her until he was sure he'd broken a few ribs, and then pulled back to look at her. "Did you have a good Christmas?" he asked.
        She laughed. "It was good, but it would have been better if you were here. How was your Christmas?"
        Lance smiled faintly. "My best ever."
        Diane arched an eyebrow and grinned, pulling Lance inside the warm house. "By all means, tell me all about it."

        "Hello?"
        "Hi, is Lance there?"
        Lance grinned. "Jace!" he exclaimed happily. "How's it going?" He dropped down onto the couch, then froze when he heard JC sniff. "JC?" Lance asked, sitting up straight and listening as intently as he could. "Josh? What's wrong?"
        "It's over, Lance."
        Lance's heart stopped beating. "What?" he breathed. JC couldn't be breaking up with him, they weren't even together!
        "Bobbie and I broke up."
        Lance felt his heart plummet into his stomach. "What happened?" he asked, horrified.
        JC sniffed again. "We just didn't work, I guess. I really don't know. One minute we were laughing together, and the next she was saying that she didn't think things were working out between us." JC's voice broke. "She knew that there was someone else."
        Lance froze, bewildered. "Someone else?" he repeated, and as soon as the words were out of his mouth, he knew exactly what JC meant.
        JC meant him.
        "I'm sorry, Lance," JC whispered, and Lance could hear the tears in JC's voice.
        Lance cleared his throat. "JC, don't be sorry. Are you at home?"
        "Florida."
        Lance nodded. "Okay. I'll be there as soon as I can."
        "You'll what?!" JC exclaimed, sounding horrified. "Lance, you can't! That's not why I called you!"
        Lance shrugged. "Well that's what you're getting. So sit tight, and I'll be there as soon as I can."
        "Lance, no--"
        Lance hung up and then opened the phone book, looking for the phone number for the airport. The phone rang in his hand and he picked it up. "Hello?" he asked off handedly.
        "JC said that I'm supposed to try and talk you into staying. What is he talking about?"
        Lance paused mid search as he heard Justin's familiar, but confused, voice. "JC and Bobbie just broke up," Lance answered. "I'm going to go comfort him."
        There was a long silence, and while Lance should have been looking up the number for the airport, he was instead listening to Justin's quickened breathing.
        "It's not like that," Lance continued finally. When he said nothing, Lance went on. "Justin, it's not."
        "I don't care what it's like," Justin finally answered. "What you and JC do is none of my business. If you want to go home with him, that's your own call."
        Lance suddenly remembered that Justin had tried to get Lance to go home with him, and Lance rubbed his forehead, thinking about how messy this was getting and how crazy it was driving him.
        "Justin, please don't be mad. It really isn't like that--" Lance tried again.
        "Why would I be mad?" Justin interrupted. "Nothing personal, Lance, but if I was gay, you wouldn't be my type."
        That hurt. It felt like a physical slap, and Lance stiffened. "Touche," Lance returned quietly, feeling like a hand was squeezing his heart. "Then I'll see you Wednesday."
        "Sure." The line went dead, and Lance stared at the phone in his hand as tears slowly slipped down his cheeks.

        "I told you not to come."
        That being the first thing that Lance was greeted with when JC's door swung open wasn't exactly promising, but Lance shrugged it off.
        "And I told you that I was. So hold this." Lance handed JC his suitcase and then grabbed his other one. "Okay, inside." He waved JC in, and then followed JC to the guest bedroom, which was also coined 'Lance's bedroom'. Once all of his stuff was dumped in the middle of the floor, Lance turned to JC and gave him a large, tight hug.
        "You okay?" Lance asked softly.
        "Not really, but there's not a lot anyone can do to help me." JC sighed and dropped his chin to Lance's shoulder. "I'm glad that you're here."
        Lance smiled. He had known that, but he was still relieved. "Me too. My family was already driving me nuts."
        JC laughed slightly and looked into Lance's eyes. "It means a lot that you cut your vacation short to come here."
        Lance arched an eyebrow. "Who said anything about cutting a vacation short?" he returned easily. "I fully intend on enjoying this little foray into Florida with my best friend." He wrapped an arm around JC's shoulders. "Come on Jace, it'll be okay. I promise."
        JC smiled weakly and allowed Lance to lead him into the living room.

        "Only 1 day til we're all back together, man," Justin soothed Chris gently. "Don't worry. Just one day."
        "I miss him," Chris whispered hoarsely. "The phone isn't enough, Justin."
        Justin sighed and rolled his eyes upwards to try and control his tears. Tell me about it, his mind drawled sarcastically. "I know, Chris. It's okay."
        Chris sighed and then his voice came back stronger as he changed the subject. "Lance called me earlier."
        Justin stiffened. "Oh?"
        "Yeah. He was crying."
        Justin felt his heart break, but he forced himself to remain impassive. "That's too bad. Why?"
        "Because you're being a dick to him, Justin!" Chris shouted back.
        Justin's jaw fell and his eyes widened. Chris, of all people, to scold him? It must be serious. But then again, Justin hadn't done anything. Lance was the one that trapsized across state boarders to be with his boyfriend, not Justin!
        "He can't figure out what he did wrong," Chris continued coldly. "And so he thinks you're mad at him for some reason... He didn't really say, just mentioned something about 'going home'. What the fuck did you do to him, Justin? JC said that he's cried practically nonstop ever since he got there, when he thought JC wasn't around to hear, of course. And JC's devistated. Not only has he lost Bobbie, but he lost Lance too, to someone that doesn't even want him. How could you fuck with his mind like that? I thought you were his friend!"
        Justin's jaw was still wide open. Lance wanted him?! But Lance was with JC. Well, right now, anyway. Chris had no proof... But god, he was making Lance cry? Justin felt like crying just hearing Chris say the words. And it was Justin's fault, so Justin couldn't even get mad at Chris.
        "I didn't fuck with his mind," Justin finally returned off handedly, still trying to process all of what Chris had just said.
        "The fuck you didn't!" Chris snapped. "You think I'm stupid, Justin? I saw all those looks you shot him. All those times you touched him, all those times that you were all over him, and that was just in public! I don't even know what you did with him in private! And Lance knew you were straight; he knows that you're straight. But you did everything you could to try and show him differently while still telling him that you weren't gay. How could you do that to him? To Lance?!"
        "I don't know," Justin whispered, feeling tears slip down his cheeks. Had he really confused and hurt Lance that much?
        "Well you better make it right," Chris warned darkly, his voice calm and dangerous. "No one fucks with Lance, Justin. Not while I'm around."
        Justin heard Chris start to hang up the phone and in a split second made a life altering decision. "Chris!" Justin shouted loudly.
        There was a hesitation, then, "What?"
        Justin closed his eyes against the tears. "I wasn't fucking with his mind," he whispered, feeling himself begin to choke on his tears. "I-I..."
        "You?" Chris snapped impatiently.
        Justin stiffened and swallowed hard. "I love him."
        There was silence, and then a laugh. "Good for you, Justin," Chris complimented, sounding like the normal Chris that Justin knew. "It took you long enough." Then, "Hey Joe, he finally admitted it!"
        Justin's jaw dropped as he heard a click. "You did?" he asked eagerly. "Good for you, Justin! It's about damn time!"
        Justin couldn't believe his ears. "It was all a setup?" he asked, astonished. He'd played right into their grasp!
        Chris spoke seriously. "No. None of it was a setup. I am deadly serious, Justin. Don't fuck with Lance's mind. He hasn't stopped crying when he's alone. Like I said, we don't know what's really going on, other than JC lost Lance to you, and Lance thinks that he's all alone now."
        Justin closed his eyes, and slowly recomposed himself. "Joey, what are you doing at Chris'?"
        "I'm not," Joey told him cheerfully. "He's with me."
        Justin hesitated, his heart beat speeding up slightly. "With you?" he repeated hopefully.
        "I told you the distance was killing me," Chris returned easily, and Justin could hear his grin, then his jaw fell when he heard a kissing sound.
        "Oh, tell me you two did not just kiss!" Justin exclaimed excitedly, though he was still thinking about Lance.
        "Okay, we didn't just kiss," Joey told him.
        "You just kissed, didn't you?"
        "Quite a few times, actually," Chris answered, and Justin knew he was grinning.
        "Aw, you guys... That's great. That's just great. I'm so happy for you. It's about time!"
        They both laughed. "Well, it's kinda your fault, Justin," Chris told him. "After you made me admit to being in love with Joey, and then Joey saw you and I together and I saw him and Lance together that day at the hotel... It just clicked."
        "Wait... You guys have been together ever since?" Justin couldn't believe his ears.
        "Surprise," Joey teased.
        Justin burst out laughing. "I'm impressed."
        "Be impressed later. Go call a certain blond haired, green eyed boy that we all know now," Chris ordered.
        Justin smiled. "Gladly. Bye guys."
        "Bye!"
        "And congrats!" Justin shouted, then hung up the phone, his heart pounding in his ears. Nervously he dialed JC's number, and waited, his heart drumming in his ears.
        The phone picked up, someone cleared their throat, and Justin heard a thick but trying to be normal, "Hello?"
        "JC?"
        JC sniffed and cleared his throat. "Justin? Is that you?"
        Justin felt his heart plummet into his stomach. "Yeah, JC, it's me. Are you okay?"
        "Yeah, I'm fine. Want me to go grab Lance? He's making lunch."
        Justin pursed his lips and the next words out of his mouth he knew were going to ruin his life. "No, Josh, but thanks. I actually called to find out how you were, not to talk to Lance."

        "I thought you were going to talk to him," Chris snapped as they took the taxi to the hotel. Justin was fidgeting nervously in his seat, wringing his fingers in his lap.
        "I was. JC picked up the phone crying and I couldn't do it, Chris. I couldn't take away the one person he loves more than life." Justin closed his eyes and opened them slowly, turning to the window. "I'm cruel, but not heartless."
        Joey's hand came down on Justin's knee. "You're not cruel, Justin," Joey soothed gently. "We know that you were trying to do the right thing."
        Justin sniffed and pursed his lips, tears coming to his eyes. "It wasn't easy, you know?" he asked sadly, sniffing. "It was one of the hardest things I've ever done. Just... Letting go."
        "You haven't let go," Chris objected. "If you had, Lance would be with JC, and you wouldn't be crying."
        Justin swallowed hard. "I let go," he stated again. "I let him go."
        Chris frowned and scowled at Justin, but Justin gazed sadly out the window. No matter what Chris said, he had let Lance go. And he had done it out of love.

        Lance and JC dropped their belongings in their rooms before going over to Chris' room, knocking on the door. Lance had a large, sick pit of dread in his stomach, and JC wasn't even touching him. Actually, JC was keeping his distance, which made this even harder. No one wanted him. Not JC, not Justin, hell, not even his family wanted him. He had said he was leaving and they practically threw him out. They'd gotten used to life without him, and he didn't fit into their little puzzle anymore. The only place he fit was with these four other men, and honestly, he wasn't as hurt as he thought he should be. He loved these guys. They were his family.
        The door swung open, and Chris' eyes lit up. "Hey!" he greeted happily, throwing both arms around the two of them in a large hug. "It's about time! What took so long?!"
        "Our flight was delayed," JC answered, and Chris led them into the hotel room. Joey was sitting on the couch, but Justin wasn't there. Lance's heart skipped.
        "Well welcome back!" Joey exclaimed, standing and hugging them. "Miss us?"
        "I missed Chris," Lance teased lightly, even as Joey bear-hugged him. Chris grinned proudly while Joey made a sound of protest and then laughed good naturedly before hugging JC.
        "Next time, you get your own damn ice," Justin said, coming into the room. Lance turned around quickly and Justin, at the sight of him and JC, stopped short.
        "Hey," Lance greeted weakly.
        Justin smiled back, but it never hit his eyes. "Welcome back you guys." He held up the bucket of ice and rattled it. "Ice?" he offered them, sneering at Chris.
        Lance frowned and held back the tears that were starting to form, thinking about the desperate goodbye that he and Justin had shared the last time they saw each other. Things had gotten so messed up in only days... It wasn't fair!
        Justin set the bucket on the countertop of the kitchen, came back, and hugged JC. "How're you doing?" he asked fondly.
        JC smiled weakly. "I'm good. How're you?"
        "Fine, fine." Justin grinned at him and then moved to Lance, hugging him briefly; a weak hug that made Lance want to cry. "How're you?"
        "Okay," Lance answered back, his voice sounding shaky even to himself.
        "Good answer," Justin agreed, then turned to face both of them. "Did ya'll have fun in Florida?" He paused. "Are ya'll aware that I'm the only one that didn't spend these past few days with someone from this group? I think my feelings are hurt."
        There was a knock on the door, and Justin smiled. "Maybe they're not." He pulled open the door while Lance exchanged confused looks with the others.
        Britney stood there, and she smiled happily at Justin before giving him a long, deep kiss.

        Lance paced back and forth on the floor of his hotel room, shaking his head. He couldn't believe Justin's nerve. He couldn't believe his own nerve for not believing Justin's nerve. He couldn't believe that any of this was happening! And he couldn't believe that he couldn't stop crying.
        There was a knock on the door and Lance yanked it open to reveal JC, who was looking nervous and fidgeting.
        "What's up, Jace?" Lance sighed, holding out the door for JC to enter.
        JC smiled weakly at Lance as he walked into the room. "I was hoping we could mourn broken hearts together."
        "Jace, my heart isn't--"
        "Lance, we've been best friends for five years. Don't finish that."
        Lance smiled weakly. "I knew there was a reason I loved you, Jace."
        JC brought Lance into his arms as they sat on the couch together. "It'll be okay," he assured Lance softly. "Everything will work out."
        Lance curled up in JC's arms, feeling safe and protected for the first time in days. Why oh why couldn't he and JC just get together already? It was so obvious how perfect for each other they were. Damn Justin and that southern charm. He hated Justin Timberlake. He really, truly did.

        "Okay, guys, big smiles for the camera!" the photographer instructed.
        The guys all flashed wide grins, and when the picture was taken, Lance jumped on JC's back. JC laughed and staggered a few steps, and Chris began pummeling Joey. Justin stood in the middle and shook his head, and the photographer snapped the pictures.
        "Die!" Lance shouted at JC, mock strangling him. Justin couldn't bare to look at Lance anymore, because it was very apparent that Lance and JC were together. The only thing Justin hadn't seen yet was a kiss, but other than that, they were always all over each other, Lance sat in JC's lap, they were always whispering and laughing together, and they radiated happiness.
        Justin hated JC.
        JC grabbed one of Lance's legs and gave him a jerk and a twist, so that somehow Lance's body was thrown over JC's shoulder, his butt beside JC's face. JC gave it a smack as he paraded around with his prize, while Lance yelped in protest.
        "On the couch, guys!" the photographer begged.
        Justin sat down on the back of the couch, setting his feet on the cushion, and making sure that there was plenty of space between him and the opposite side of the couch, which JC and Lance would almost definitely take.
        They did.
        Lance was very clearly avoiding Justin, though it was a polite avoidance. If Justin was there, he wouldn't ignore him, but he was polite and cool to him, treating him as nothing more than a mere acquaintance.
        The past three days had been hell.
        Today was New Year's Eve, and tomorrow would be New Years day, and they'd be ringing in the first year of the new millenium. And Justin would be doing it alone.
        He'd sent Britney packing that morning, but none of the other guys knew that.
        Justin was a total mess on the inside, and it didn't help that Chris kept glaring at him. Chris knew that Justin had brought Britney there to take his mind off of Lance, but Justin had had an alterior motive as well.
        He knew it would drive Lance straight into JC's arms.
        Bitterly, Justin realized that he'd been right. JC had an arm around Lance's shoulders and they were laughing together. Justin couldn't help but look forlornly, longingly, at Lance, startled when he suddenly realized that pictures were being snapped like mad of his expression and of the group; not to mention who he was staring at. Justin frowned and quickly looked away from Lance, worried that he would be caught. What if they used one of those pictures in a magazine? They were at Janet's house hours before the party was even to begin taking promotional shots for a magazine, and then they were going to change there and start out the night with a bang, doing a set of 8 songs for the party.
        Justin wasn't looking forward to it.
        Joey wrapped an arm over Justin's knee, and Justin smiled weakly at him. Joey seemed to be the one who understood Justin's position the best, and Justin was ever grateful to him.
        The guys were given noise makers and party hats, and they blew on the little horns and rolled the noise makers in an early celebration. They laughed when they had confetti on them, except for Justin, who was inwardly scowling. He wasn't in the partying mood, and now he had to try and get this damn confetti out of his hair. Life just wasn't fair.
        Finally, they were free to go, and Justin all but ran to the back to shake out his hair, change his clothes, and sulk. He planned on hiding out for as long as he could, but even so, it was so close to the time to go out there that he and the other guys had to go warm up.
        They started out with some simple harmonies, moved up to songs, and then practiced the songs they'd be singing that night. Justin's heart wasn't in it, and he lifelessly sang his words.
        "You could put a little feeling behind that," Chris suggested, and Justin closed his mouth and looked up at him.
        "You want to take the lead?" Justin asked. "Take it. I don't want it."
        Chris sighed and shook his head. "Just sing the song, Justin."
        Justin scowled at him. "I was trying, and then you interrupted me."
        "Alright, don't," Joey interrupted, putting a hand on Chris' chest. "Cut it out, both of you. We don't need to fight, we need to sing."
        Justin rolled his eyes. "Trying," he reminded sing-songingly, then scowled. "Let's just do this and get it over with, can we?"
        "Don't sound too enthused, Justin," JC sighed sarcastically.
        Justin could hardly bare to look at him, knowing that Lance was practically on his lap, but he managed to anyway, and ended up catching sight of the most beautiful man in the world. Damn Lance for making his heart flutter like this. "I'll do my best," Justin returned coldly. "I need water." He stood and walked out, practically shaking.
        On the trip to the kitchen, Justin paused as he saw a picture of him and his friends. Not as Nsync, but as a group of friends hanging out together and having a good time. Lance was standing between Justin and JC, and Chris and Joey were on Justin's other side. Justin had an arm wrapped around Lance's waist, and Lance had an arm around Justin's, while JC had his arm around Lance's shoulders. Justin and Lance were leaning in together slightly, though it was only apparent if it was being looked for. But it was true, they were leaning in together. Justin vaguely remembered thinking about how heavenly Lance's cologne had been... That had been so many months ago, way back in July! Had he known he loved Lance the whole time? What was it that Lance said? It only took a split second to fall in love? Justin had agreed to believing him at the time, and yet now he knew it was true. It had taken only a second, and he had fallen head over heels for Lance Bass.
        With a sigh Justin turned away from the picture and went to go get his water. When he returned a few minutes later, the guys were all harmonizing. Justin carefully avoided looking at Lance as he sat down on the mantle and closed his eyes, listening to the harmony and soothing sound drift over his body. This was the part about music that he loved. When he could feel the other guys' voices, calming him down. Specifically, he found Lance's voice and listened to it, loving Lance's rich low voice. And then, as they hit the key that was when he was supposed to start, he opened his mouth and joined them.
        The sound was rich and powerful and strong, full of meaning and passion that Justin had lost long ago. The surprise could be heard in the other guys' voices, but they kept going, and Justin didn't stop either, never opening his eyes. His thoughts were all focused on Lance, and the love he felt for him, until he was so consumed by the emotion that he didn't even think about the words, just let them flow. When the song was completely over, he allowed his voice to die out. And then, he opened his eyes.
        Chris was the first person he saw. Chris' eyes were wide, his jaw was unhinged, and he was staring at Lance. Joey was looking between Justin and Lance and back again, and JC was looking down at Lance sadly, and then up at Justin with understanding in his eyes.
        Lance was sitting there calmly, his hands folded in his lap, his green eyes burning into Justin's.
        Justin was utterly confused as to what the other guys were doing looking at Lance. Was it possible that they were able to pick up his thoughts through his voice? He hoped not. He scowled at them and then stood when Janet came into the room to wish them all luck. The guests had all arrived, at least, most of them, and it was time to go out there.
        They all hugged in a large group, and then treked on out to the ballroom, where there was a stage set up. The lights dimmed and the guys assumed their positions. At the last second, Justin couldn't help but look over at Lance, who was staring out at the crowd. Slowly, Lance's eyes came over and met Justin's, and Lance smiled, the first genuine smile Justin had seen from him in days.
        It made Justin's heart sing.
        The music started and so did Justin, facing the crowd quickly. The songs went well, thankfully, and Justin had to admit that his voice hadn't sounded that good in a long time. He was really on a roll tonight. He wasn't sure what it was, but he was sounding good, without trying to be conceited.
        When their set was over, they scattered. Justin went to go hang out with the Backstreet Boys, who were very supportive and friendly, Joey and Chris were with some record execs in the living room, and Lance and JC had disappeared someplace. Justin had no idea where they were.
        "You sounded great tonight," Nick complimented Justin. "I mean, really great. You had major power behind that. Lots of feeling."
        "Yeah," Brian echoed. "I got chills."
        Justin blushed. "Thanks. I appreciate it."
        "It's true," AJ told him. "We're merely stating facts."
        Justin grinned and laughed slightly. "Well thank you for stating the facts. It felt good tonight. Like I haven't done it in a long time, and it was like... I don't really know how to describe it..."
        "A release?" Nick supplied.
        Justin paused and stared at him. "Yeah. Exactly like a release."
        Nick grinned. "I know the feeling. Sometimes when I'm out of it for a while, I'll sing, but it won't mean anything to me. And then, one day, something happens, and it's like... Wow. My voice is back, and I'm finally singing again. It's the best feeling."
        "Almost euphoric," Justin agreed. "It was great."
        Nick laughed and nodded, slinging an arm around Justin's shoulders. "Let's go get some punch," he suggested. "I'm famished."
        Justin laughed and went into the kitchen with Nick. Nick snatched up a bunch of food from the table while Justin got them drinks, and they made their way back to the family room, where the other guys were.
        Justin joked around with the five of them for a while, and then left to go wander around and see if he couldn't find Chris and Joey. The person he really wanted to find was Lance, but Lance and JC were gone. No one had seen them the whole time, and Justin got sick to his stomach thinking about what they were doing. Alone. Together.
        Speaking of, the bathroom was right there.
        After Justin had lost what little bit of Nick's food he'd eaten, Justin rinsed out his mouth with mouth wash, relieved to find some in the cabinet under the sink. He straightened himself out and forced a charming smile in the mirror, gave himself a disgusted look, and then walked out.
        "Hey!" someone called. Justin froze, knowing that voice, and slowly turned to see Danielle Fishel, Lance's ex girlfriend, hurrying towards him. She gave him a big hug, which he weakly returned, and flashed him a broad grin. "How have you been, Justin?" she asked warmly.
        Justin smiled weakly. "Good, Danielle. How about you?"
        Danielle waved her hand, taking a sip of her wine. "Great, fine. Have you seen Lance?"
        Justin stiffened. "Nope. I don't know where he is."
        She frowned slightly, then brightened. "Okay. Well, see you later!" She brushed past him and down the hallway, and Justin sighed in relief, making his way out to the living room. Really, all he wanted to do was find one of his friends, sit next to them, and never move for the rest of the night. He had no idea why he'd agreed to come to this party. He could have stayed at the hotel and done the same thing, only been more comfortable.
        That was it, he was going home.
        Justin turned on his heel and went to the front door, hardly being able to go a foot without being stopped by someone who wanted to say hi and chat for a few minutes. Justin, exasperated, finally ducked his head and hurried to the door, charging out of it and searching for his buried limo.
        "Gonna call a taxi," Justin muttered, pulling out his cell phone and dialing the operator. He was connected to the taxi company and waited impatiently as he slowly froze on the front porch. "Hi, I'd like a taxi." He prattled off Janet's address. "Yes, okay. Thank you." He ended the phone call. Twenty minutes wasn't so long, he supposed, and the cold air would be good for him. He wandered out to the street, past the guarded gates, and waited for the taxi to come. Half of him wanted to go back in there and get Lance, but his rational side won out and he simply stood where he was, waiting for the taxi. Lance was with JC, now, and Justin had lost. Justin was alone.
        10:58.
        The taxi pulled up to the road and Justin hopped inside, telling him the name of his hotel. The taxi driver took off, and Justin waited silently for them to reach the hotel.
        11:25.
        Justin climbed out of the taxi and paid him before going inside the hotel, sighing as he made his way up to his hotel room. He placed his key in the door, turned the handle...
        And found himself all alone in the hotel room.

        "Five minutes til the ball drops!" Someone announced. Lance looked over at JC and smiled. He was glad that he and JC had worked things out. They really were better as best friends. Their kiss that night had proven that. Lance would have been happy if they could find Justin. Even if Justin was going to be a silent jerk, Lance didn't care. It wouldn't be right to ring in the new year without him.
        On Lance's other side, Chris shifted nervously. "Where is he?" he muttered, looking around for Justin.
        Lance shook his head and scanned the room as well. "I'll go check the ballroom," he told his friends, standing from the couch and making his way to the ballroom, silently cursing themselves for not bringing their body guards. The one time they didn't bring them, and Justin slipped away. If he was hurt... Lance was going to kill him!
        "Hey, Lance!" Nick Carter greeted, slinging an arm around Lance's shoulders. He'd obviously had a little too much to drink, but he was still slightly sober. "What're you doing?"
        "Looking for Justin," Lance answered off handedly, searching the room desperately. Justin, where are you?
        "I think he went back to your hotel," Nick told him thoughtfully, then laughed drunkenly. "I don't 'member. Just 'member him runnin' outta here like his ass was on fire."
        Lance stopped short. "You saw Justin leave?"
        Nick nodded. "Didn't look too happy, either."
        "When?" Lance demanded.
        Nick shrugged. "'bout an hour ago."
        Oh god, could Justin have seen his and JC's kiss? It had only lasted for a few seconds... Shit! Lance took off back to the living room, where everyone was on their feet and waiting excitedly for the countdown to begin.
        "Nick said he went back to the hotel," Lance told his friends frantically. "He's not here!"
        JC frowned worriedly. "Nick who?"
        "Nick Carter!" Lance snapped, then shook himself. "Sorry, Jace." He took a deep breath. "Justin's not here. He went back to the hotel about an hour ago."
        "30 seconds!"
        Lance shook his head in disbelief. "This is not happening. Tell me this is not happening."
        Chris took Lance by the shoulders. "What the hell are you doing still here if he's there?" he demanded. "Go!"
        "Go where?"
        In unison, four heads turned to look at Justin.
        "You're here!" JC exclaimed. "Lance said that Nick said that you went back to the hotel--"
        "I did," Justin interrupted smoothly. "I forgot something."
        "10 seconds!"
        "What?" Lance asked, utterly bewildered and yet relieved at the same time. Justin was here. They were going to bring in the new year, the new millinium, together as a family; the five of them.
        "5...4...3...2..."
        "You."
        Lance's jaw fell. Justin didn't just say what he thought he said, did he? He couldn't have! It wasn't possible!
        All around them, people were kissing one another, and Justin smiled, leaned forward, and gently placed his lips against Lance's.
        Lance had never felt anything more magical in his entire life. Around him, the entire world was a whirlwind of activity as people went from person to person, kissing quickly and then moving on to the next person. But Lance and Justin stood still, their arms wrapped around each other as they kissed. Lance had never felt anything so perfect in his entire life. His knees were weak, his stomach was full of butterflies, and his heart was literally aching for Justin.
        "I love you," Justin whispered in his ear softly as they hugged.
        Lance laughed out loud, hugging him as tightly as he could. "I love you, too," he laughed happily. "I love you so much!"
        Justin cleared his throat, his eyes lit as he pulled away. "Wait," he ordered, then took a deep breath and closed his eyes. "I want to get this right." He opened his eyes and smiled. "Love is where you can't wait to see them again. Where you can go to a movie and actually watch the movie. Where you can be at the same party in completely different rooms and know that it's okay for you two to be apart for hours and hours and hours, maybe even weeks, and yet you don't love them any less and you don't have this desperate urge to be with them at all times. A want, yes. A longing, yes. A desperate desire? No. Where they'll wake you up in the middle of the night just because they want to hear you speak. Where you can feel their eyes on you even when you can't see them; you can feel them before you see them. When you're in a crowded room and you almost instinctively know where they are. Where the silences are half of the relationship. Where you can read their mind and know their thoughts and finish their sentences. Where even though you're not connected by blood, you're family. Where you want them to know everything about you, the good and the bad, because you want them to share in yourself. Where you want to be with them at all times and yet you can still function without them during your day. Where they're weak, you're strong, and you're strong, they're weak. Where they complete you even though you complete yourself. Where you're completely comfortable with them, but you still get shivers down your spine when you see them, or your heart skips a beat. Where every moment is new and wonderful because you love them and they love you. Where they are your angel on earth. And that, James Lance Bass, is how I love you."
        Lance couldn't help it. He started to cry, and buried himself in Justin's arms. Justin loved him. He loved Justin. They were going to be together, forever. Lance was sure of it.
        And forever couldn't be long enough.

~~~~End~~~~


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