Client: Barry R.

D.O.B: September 10, 1960



Barry can usually be found in the kitchen trying to weasel a morsel of food
or fulfilling his duties as Kentley's official "Kitchen Assistant".  His
loud "GABBA GABBA"'s can be heard throughout the entire house -- much to
the delight of the other clients.  He will sit during the preparation of
supper and critique the cook's skill or lack thereof.  Raised on a steady
diet of "Pasquale", and "Yan Can Cook", the man really knows what he's
talking about.



Speaking of food, it seems to be a bit of an obsession for Mr. R.  He
lives for the weekends when his mother drops by with her weekly smorgasbord
in hand.  Barry quickly devours the dinosaur-sized meal and then gives Mom
five as a thank you.  He will then burp approximately 87 times, saunter out
of the kitchen, and plop himself down on the couch -- loudly vocalizing his
contentment.



Barry loves to engage in water sports, such as kitchen waterpolo, "splash
the window", and "let's see how fast I can make the staff run when I'm
pointing the kitchen hose at them".  In much the same vein, Barry LOVES
getting a bath every night.  He will splash happily in the tub as he LOUDLY
yells "GABBA GABBA GUY!  GABBA GE!!" -- driving the staff and other clients
completely nuts.  The only difficulty presents itself when attempting to
get him back out.  The harness used to transport elephants to and from zoos
seems to work quite well.  Or just throw a few trays of ice cubes in the
water.



Barry also enjoys the occasional television program -- especially WWF
Wrestling and "Married with Children".  Each time the theme from a favorite
show begins to play, he will rush towards the screen.  The entire house
rocks as if a 7.5 scale earthquake is in full swing as Barry stomps loudly
and bellows: "GABBA GABBA OH... BABY!!!" at the top of his lungs.



Another favorite activity of Barry's is lying like a beached whale on top
of the picnic table while stretching one of socks into an unrecognizable
mass of fabric.  Naturally, he is yelling "GABBA GABBA"  and "OH! BABY!!!"
at the same time.  I'll bet you saw that one coming down Nash Road.  Not
too predictable, eh?  Anyway, the neighbors are, needless to say, thrilled
to be living next to Kentley.



Of special note is Barry's wife of two years,  Patricia W. III,esq.  Both
Patti and Barry are perfect examples of upper class breeding -- extremely
well-mannered and overflowing with social grace and sophistication.  

Patti and Barry enjoy whiling away the hours sharing Patti's glass slipper
and discussing current events.  As a gesture of affection,  Patti will grab
Barry's hand and then proceed to slap herself on the stomach, chest, and head
with it.  Again, an example of their fine breeding.  Apparently, this has 
become all the rage at cocktail parties amongst well-to-do socialites.



In conclusion, Barry is a wonderful individual whose fine breeding and
exquisite taste has made him the toast of the town among Hamilton's social
elite.  In the smorgasbord that is life, he has sampled everything, and
enjoyed the meal immensely.



Signing off...



     






  	
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