The Young the Brave and the Beautiful
Chapter Two
INDEPENDENCE INN. FAITH AND BUFFY’S ROOM. DAY. Faith and Buffy, having arrived in Stars Hollow from LA, enter their room and throw their bags on the floor. Buffy looks anxious.
BUFFY: Just one bed.
FAITH: What’s wrong, B? Don’t you mind sharing a bed with me? It doesn’t bother you, does it?
BUFFY: Oh, no… It’s just… When Willow booked the room, it might have been nice if she had booked a room with double beds, that’s all.
FAITH: Well, don’t hog all the covers. OK?
Faith can’t help but let out a wicked smile. Oh, so much that is unspoken between them!
FAITH: That was one long flight. Damn, I’m starving. Let’s unpack later. Let’s see if we can find a place to eat in this flea-bitten dusthole.
They head downstairs.
LOBBY. DAY.
Faith and Buffy walk up to Lorelai at the front desk.
BUFFY: Excuse me miss. Is there any place we can get something to eat around here?
LORELAI: Yes. There’s Luke’s. Great hamburgers. But if I were you, I’d stay away from the honey buns today, though. Had one this morning, and boy, let me tell you, whoa, you talk about the runs, I mean, not a pretty picture.
BUFFY: OK… (to Faith beneath her breath): Boy, is she a screwball.
FAITH: I have a feeling there’s going to be a lot of screwballs running around loose in this town.
LORELAI: Just hang a right out the front door, make a right at the end of the block, walk two blocks down, make another a right, and Luke’s is on the corner across from the high school. Can’t miss it.
BUFFY: Thanks.
Faith stares at Lorelai.
LORELAI: Is there something wrong?
FAITH: Oh, no. It’s just you look familiar, that’s all.
LORELAI: Well, people say I look like Tina Turner. But no way. I mean, c’mon, I’m like way prettier than Tina Turner.
FAITH: Uh, huh…
Faith and Buffy leave.
SIDEWALK. DAY. Faith and Buffy head towards Luke’s.
FAITH: You know, I think the nut job at the front desk and the girl I saw in my dream may be related.
BUFFY: What, you think they look alike?
FAITH: Yeah.
Just then, Rory and Paris walk out of Luke’s. Faith sees them and stops dead in her tracks.
FAITH: Hey, Buffy. There she is. The girl I saw in my dream!
BUFFY: Are you sure?
FAITH: Yeah, I’m sure. Of course I’m sure.
Faith and Buffy run up to Rory and Paris.
FAITH: I know you.
RORY: Excuse me?
FAITH: I know you!… I’m Faith.
Paris stares cynically at Buffy.
PARIS: Don’t tell me. You’re Hope. And Charity is running around here somewhere.
RORY: Paris!
BUFFY: What?
RORY: Umm, nothing…
BUFFY: I’m Buffy.
No sooner was the word “Buffy” out of Buffy’s mouth, than Paris was ready to fire off a barrage of zingers. But before she could get out a word Rory grabbed her and pulled her aside.
RORY: Paris.
PARIS: Rory, let’s be honest here, you can’t name your kid “Buffy” and not expect that kid to be the subject of innumerable witty comebacks.
RORY: Paris…
PARIS: What am I suppose to do here, Rory? I mean, you just can’t plop a Buffy in front of me and expect my snark meter to go to zero.
RORY: Be nice, Paris.
PARIS: Who are these bozos, anyway… You don’t know these girls, do you?
RORY: Ah, you’re so cute when you’re jealous… But I don’t know who they are. Let’s find out… Promise me you’ll behave.
PARIS: OK.
Rory and Paris snuggle noses together – too cute! They walk back to Faith and Buffy.
RORY: I’m Rory. And this is Paris.
BUFFY: Pleased.
PARIS: So you two are married too?
BUFFY: Uh, not that it’s any of your business, but no, we’re both single.
FAITH: I don’t think that’s what she means, Buff.
BUFFY: Oh… Ooooh! Ewwwww!
FAITH: No, we aren’t… You two –
BUFFY: Oh, God. I think I’m going to get the runs, and I didn’t even get to munch on a damned honey bun!
PARIS: Rory, I think this is another one of those awkward moments. Well girls, let me de-awkwardtize it for you and give you the skinny. Rory is my wife. We’re married. So if any of you Barbies have designs on her, you can just forget it.
FAITH: That’s not why we’re here –
BUFFY: Lord knows that’s not why we’re here!
FAITH: Rory, I saw you in a dream I had. There was some guy, tall, lanky, standing over you with a sword –
PARIS: Oh, God.
RORY: How could you know that?
FAITH: Like I said, I saw you in my dream. Actually, a vision… Look, we’ll explain everything, but first you have to come with us. Your life may be in danger.
Just then, BOOM!! A large explosion shakes the block. The four women hit the deck. They look to their right, and see that Mrs. Kim’s antique shop has exploded. The entire house has been demolished.
The four of them race over there.
RORY: Mrs. Kim! Lane!
They sift through the debris, desperately searching for survivors. The entire building is now just a mass of twisted, smoldering rubble.
PARIS: Rory, over here! I found Mrs. Kim!
Mrs. Kim is buried in a crevice in the debris. A massive antique bureau lies on top of her. Taylor comes running up.
TAYLOR: Oh, God… Don’t you worry, Mrs. Kim. We’ll have you out in a quick flash… (to the girls): This bureau must weigh a couple hundred pounds at least. Somebody find Luke!
RORY: No. I got it.
Rory lifts up the bureau and moves it aside. Everyone looks on amazed.
PARIS: How did you do that?
RORY: I don’t know. I just did.
BUFFY (to Faith): Are you thinking what I’m thinking?
FAITH: Yeah. She must be a Potential.
Buffy, Faith and Taylor lift Mrs. Kim out of the crevice and carry her to the grass.
RORY: Lane!
MRS. KIM: No, Lane she not there. I the only one in building.
RORY: Thank God.
TAYLOR: Don’t worry, Mrs. Kim. Just lie there still. The paramedics will be here any second.
MRS. KIM: No. I fine… (to Buffy): There is very little time. Come, we must go somewhere where we can talk.
BUFFY: Are you talking to me?
MRS. KIM: Yes I’m talking to you!
BUFFY: Um, we don’t know each other.
MRS. KIM: I know all about you. You are Puffy the Vampire Slayer –
BUFFY: That’s Buffy, with a “B.”
MRS. KIM: Buffy. Puffy. What difference does it make!… There is no time for this. We must leave now. Help me up.
Buffy helps Mrs. Kim to her feet. Loralei comes running up.
LORALEI: Oh my God! What happen here?
TAYLOR: Not sure. The antique shop just exploded. Maybe a natural gas leak…
MRS. KIM: Uh… Yes. That’s it. A gas leak… But I am all right. No one was hurt… Lorelai, can I go to your house? I need to rest. A very traumatic experience.
LORALEI: Of course.
They help Mrs. Kim to Loralei’s house.
LORALEI’S HOUSE. LIVING ROOM. DAY. Mrs. Kim sits on the sofa, sipping a cup of coffee. The four girls and Loralei hover around her.
RORY: Ma, you can go back to work now. Mrs. Kim is fine. If I need anything, I’ll call you. OK?
LORALEI: OK.
Loralei leaves.
MRS. KIM: Good grief. I thought she would never leave.
BUFFY: How do you know who I am?
MRS. KIM: Because my daughter, Lane, is also a vampire slayer.
PARIS (to Rory beneath her breath): I think that explosion shook something loose.
MRS. KIM: I am perfectly sane, Paris, I can assure you… Buffy, will you fill these two in. But do it quickly. Time is of the essence.
Buffy gives Rory and Paris the lowdown on Slayerdom. After Buffy finishes, Rory and Paris burst out into laughter.
BUFFY: They don’t believe me.
MRS. KIM: We will prove it. Rory, how do you think you were able to lift that bureau off of me?
PARIS: Adrenaline. Pure and simple.
MRS. KIM: Here. Rory, I bet you can lift me and this sofa in the air with one hand.
PARIS: Impossible.
Rory tries it and is able to do it.
PARIS: Oh, shit.
Faith tries and is able to do it. So is Buffy. Paris tries it and the sofa doesn’t budge.
RORY: No! No! No! I can’t be a vampire slayer. I get queasy at the sight of blood… I’m going to Yale! I’m going to be a journalist! I’m going to travel all over the world and get my picture on the cover of Time magazine! And me and Paris are going to live happily ever after! I am not going to spend my life running around cemeteries hunting down things that go bump in the night!
Paris comforts Rory.
BUFFY: I know how you feel. I like majorly freaked out when I first found out. But you are what you are. You can’t run away from it.
MRS. KIM: Enough of this… There is more. More that you, Buffy, don’t know about… That was no gas explosion. Kirk destroyed my home and business.
RORY: Kirk?
FAITH: Who is Kirk?
RORY: He’s the guy you saw in my – your – dream… I don’t understand. Why would Kirk do that?
MRS. KIM: Because Kirk is a vampire. A very old one. And he came to my house for the express purpose of retrieving that which was taken from him over five hundred years ago. And when he didn’t find it, he tried to kill me and destroyed my home.
BUFFY: But that’s impossible. Vampires can’t survive in the daylight.
MRS. KIM: Kirk is unlike any vampire that has ever existed. Enormously powerful. He is also a warlock, experienced in the dark arts… It is an ancient story. Over a half millennium ago, the secret society of the Knights of the Templar, of which Kirk was a member, possessed a very rare, valuable object. A Slayer by the name of Alexis – she was French – captured this object. Alexis is also known to history as Lionhearted. She is the greatest slayer that has ever lived… At any rate, the object she captured was so valuable that a separate line of slayers came into being solely to protect it. These slayers are known as Guardians. My daughter, Lane, is a Guardian. She is with this object now and is prepared to defend it with her life. That is why I have been so strict with Lane, so that she can fulfil her sacred duty as a Guardian.
Now, Buffy, you spoke of this witch Willow who cast a spell so that any potential slayer might have the power of a slayer –
BUFFY: Yes.
MRS. KIM: My guess is that the releasing of so much energy is what led Kirk to me and Lane. Perhaps it came to him in a dream, like Rory came to Faith in a dream… Rory, since Kirk has been in your dreams, that can only mean that not only are you a vampire slayer, but also a Guardian. If – God forbid – something should happen to Lane, then you would be next in line to defend this object, with your life if necessary.
BUFFY: I almost hate to ask. What is this object?
MRS. KIM: The Sangreal.
FAITH: What’s that?
RORY: God, no! No!
BUFFY: What is this Sangreal?
PARIS: The Sangreal is the Holy Grail.
BUFFY: Oh, shoot!
MRS. KIM: Rory, you know the cave by the lake where you and Lane use to go when you were kids?
RORY: Yes.
MRS. KIM: That is where Lane is now. You must go to her. I fear it is only a matter of time before Kirk is able to find her. Once you reach Lane, you must help her to protect the Grail and defeat the unspeakable evil that Kirk represents. Please, you must leave now. I fear it may already be too late.
They leave.