  Ribbon placed on January 8,2000. The pink breast cancer awareness ribbon is up in honor of a sweet friend and sister in the Lord ... my friend Cathy. She has been diagnosed with breast cancer as of the last week of 1999. Cathy is the mom of 3 precious little ones.
 When I met Cathy in 1998, we hit it off very well from the beginning. I had a baby and not long after, she was expecting. When her baby Katie came, we would meet in the ladies restroom at church. We would sit on the sofa and talk and visit, while baby Katie nursed contentedly. Every week, we would part,jokingly saying "meet you in the bathroom next week!" Life was good! We had no reason to think anything would change, except that we would get to know each other better, and grow closer. WRONG! In December of 1999, everything changed. Baby Katie was about 7 months old and suddenly began to bite the breast that fed her . . . she became so persistent that her mom was forced to go ahead and wean her, though she had hoped Katie would nurse for much longer. It seemed she suddenly did not want to. Within days of that weaning, Cathy would find a lump, that would send her hastily, to the doctor. The week between Christmas and New Year's, she was diagnosed with breast cancer. My young, HEALTHY friend was facing a fight with a ferocious beast. It was not the first time I had seen cancer up close. But it was the first time I had faced it in someone so young, and so apparently healthy. In January, Cathy had surgery to remove the cancerous breast. She had a port implanted in her chest, to receive chemo through. In February she began receiving chemotherapy, first CAF at 3 week intervals, and now taxol every week . . . chemo that will go to mid September 2000. Now that the midway point in treatment has passed, it's a time of apprehension. Just what exactly is happening, if anything? Is the cancer anywhere else? One node tested positive so the cancer was classed at stage II. Is the chemo working, doing anything at all? When treatment is over, then what will happen? Will the cancer be gone? Or will it come back?? All worrisome questions that lurk in the shadows of our daily lives and threaten to rob of us peace. Gone are the carefree days when we thought little of our mortality. It seemed we had another 30, 40, 50 years before even contemplating that. A passage of scripture comes to mind from Psalm 90:12 - "Teach us to number our days O Lord, that we may gain a heart of wisdom." Cathy does not take her days for granted. She has learned to receive every day as a gift. Even if it's a chemo day, it too, is a gift. And I am learning some things as well. The things of this earth are temporary, they are passing away. . but the one who does the will of God will abide forever. For years after my own precious loved ones died of cancer, I was afraid to even get close to someone that had it. They had my sympathy, but I could not draw near to them, in friendship and love. It was too painful to endure the loss that it might eventually bring. Better to not get too close - then it would not hurt so bad. For years I lived like this. Then the Lord introduced me to Cathy! Good thing I didn't know she had cancer lurking within, (Which she probably had when we met, unknown to all of us) or I would have run fast, the other way! And so many good things would not have happened, that have happened as a result of her coming into my life. God was sneaky! He formed the attachment, He created a bond there, before He let on that she was sick. So when faced with the heartbreaking news, I was caught! I could run away, and try not to think too much about her, not talk to her anymore, not get any closer . . . then if the unthinkable happened, it would not hurt me so bad. . . right?! But I could not deny what God had already placed in my heart - a love for her! So after crying my eyes out over the news, I sat down and composed a letter to her, as follows:
With the letter, I sealed my decision. If I could have the opportunity of knowing and loving Cathy for one year, five years, or fifty years . . I wanted that opportunity! And with the glad assurance that we would be friends always, in heaven - I was freed to just love her, and take whatever may come. Am I scared? You betcha! I don't want her to ever suffer the ravages of cancer out of control. I want her to beat it and die of old age! I don't even want to imagine having to say goodbye to her, here on earth. I pray we will grow old together! We can be hip, cool, lil' ole lady friends together :-) BUT . . if God has other plans, He will help us to be faithful friends all our days on earth - and then seal that friendship in heaven forever. He will give us the grace we need, when it is needed, for whatever is in store. And the tie that binds, will remain. I'm counting on that! Because I know that what is on the earth, is fading away, but he who does the will of God shall abide forever. When it comes right down to it - who of us DOES know the future? What person knows the length of their days upon the earth? She could live another 50 years and I could be thrust into eternity this very day. Cathy does not know what the future will bring, but she does know the One who holds the future. And He holds her securely in His hands. Trustworthy is He! And so we will trust Him - we have no other choice. To Cathy : May God speed you to cure & bless you with long life, and make His face to shine upon you always! Never give up!  Click on the button above to visit a support site complete with online chatting for patients and friends, where help, information, sharing and encouragement can be found. There is also a guestbook on this site for sharing your experience with cancer. Cathy shared her own experience there, along with hundreds of others. You can read her own words below. There is a lot to learn there. If you visit the support site, be sure to use your back button to return when you are done, as I have much more to share with you!
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