After The Fire By Lady Boss
	Title: “After The Fire” Rating: PG13 (mild m/m) Author: Lady Boss E-Mail: pikachu_524@yahoo.com Distribution: The Boss’s Office - Anyone else, let me know where and ask nicely Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be, but when those numbers come up, they’re mine Summary: Adam and Mark learn that some flames never go out. “You slept with him?! Christ Adam what the hell were you thinking?” “I know it wasn’t the brightest thing to do…” “It wasn’t the brightest thing to do?” The other voice parroted. “Dude, pulling a rib on Stephanie isn’t the brightest thing to do; sleeping with your ex when you’re just starting a new relationship is fucking moronic!” Sitting on the edge of one the beds, Adam watched Jay pace back and forth as he sat in Jay and Chris’s hotel room. This was the first time he had a chance to see either Jay or his boyfriend Chris Jericho since the Royal Rumble, “No Way Out” giving them a chance to hang out and catch up on things. Top of the list being Adam’s confession. “Jay,” Chris said from the other bed. “Just cut him some slack will you? It’s not like he cheated on you.” “How the hell could you do this to Oscar?” Jay demanded as though he hadn’t heard Chris. “Didn’t we talk a few weeks ago and you were telling me how happy the two of you were? How the hell could you go and sleep with Mark again?” “It just happened.” “Are you going to tell him?” Chris spoke. “I’ve thought about it.” “You should’ve thought about not going to Mark’s room in the first place.” Jay snapped. “I didn’t come here to get judged.” Adam returned, tired of Jay’s attitude. “I wanted to talk about this with someone. My best friend especially, but if you’re going to be like this, then the hell with you.” Adam stood and headed for the door before Jay took his arm. “Adam, I’m sorry,” Jay apologized. “Don’t go.” Adam looked at Jay. “You going to spare me the sermons?” Jay sighed as he let go of Adam’s arm. “I just don’t understand why you slept with Mark again. You told me after New Year’s, it was over with you and Mark and you and Oscar were set.” “I thought so too but…” “But what?” Chris asked gently. Frustrated, Adam began his own pacing, “I told him on Valentine’s Day I would outgrow him because I loved Oscar. ‘Four years Adam,’ he told me. ‘You can’t ‘grow out’ of something like what we had.’ And you know the scary thing about it? He’s right.” “Do you still love him?” Jay asked. “A part of me does,” Adam admitted as he sat on the corner of Jay’s bed, hanging his head. “A part of me wants to say the hell with Sara, the hell with Oscar and just be with Mark again.” “Even though he’s hurt you so many times?” Jay challenged. “Telling you he’s marrying Sara and making promises he never kept. How can you still love someone who does that to you Adam?” “I don’t know.” Adam admitted, pushing his hair away from his face. “It wasn’t all bad. When we were together, when it was just him and me -” “That’s just it Adam, it’s not just you and him anymore.” Jay reminded. “He’s got a wife and you have Oscar. It’s not nineteen ninety-nine anymore. We’re not The Brood and there is no Ministry.” “I know.” “Listen,” Chris swung his legs over to sit on the edge of his bed. “I know you wanted a life with Mark; the whole little cottage, white picket fence, two German Shepards and all that, but I just don’t see it happening for the two of you. I know it’s harsh to say, but it’s true.” “He said he was divorcing her.” Jay groaned as he sat on one of the chairs by the table, dropping his head into his hands before looking at his childhood friend. “Don’t you know that’s what they all say? He’s just dangling that carrot in front of you Adam. He’s not going to leave her anymore than I’m going to be Raw World Champion. You can’t let him manipulate you like this.” “Next thing you know, you’ll be wanting him to come to Raw with us.” Chris spoke. “Might not be such a bad idea.” “Oh no,” Adam shook his head. “I’ve busted my ass to get my spot on SmackDown, I’m not going over to Raw and be one of Bischoff’s bitches.” “Are you calling us bitches?” Jay said with a bit of humor in his voice. “I don’t mind being called a bitch, but referring to us as Bischoff’s,” Chris shivered dramatically. “That’s just wrong.” Adam chuckled. “But you’re content with being Mark’s bitch?” Jay asked, his tone serious. “I never said I was his bitch.” “You go to his room and fuck him while Oscar’s waiting for you to come back. You sneak off to see him on Valentine’s Day and leave Oscar behind. You’re sitting here, thinking he’s serious about divorcing his wife. If his yanking your chain like this doesn’t make you his bitch, I don’t know what does.” “And what about you?” Adam looked at Jay. “If Dave called and said he dumped Luna and wanted you back, you wouldn’t be out the door? And don’t give me some nice, pat answer because Chris is here because I’m sure that’s something he’s thought about as well.” “There’s a difference Adam; Dave’s not here. He’s in Puerto Rico or some other company. He’s not here day in, day out the way Mark is, so he isn’t a temptation to me the way Mark has obviously been to you.” Adam had to admit Jay had him there. “And another thing,” Jay continued. “Even if he did call out of the blue to tell me what I would’ve wanted to hear four years ago, there’s no way I’d hurt Chris the way you’re going to hurt Oscar if you keep this shit with you and Mark up. I have too much respect for Chris’s feelings to go behind his back. Too bad Oscar can’t say the same thing when this all comes out and you know it’s going to.” “I know because I plan on telling him.” “When Adam? When are you going to tell him? Hmm? When he’s so in love with you he can’t think straight? When you’ve got him so under your spell you’re all he thinks about? Too late Adam, he already is and what do you think’s going to happen when you do tell him?” “Better he hear it from me than from someone else.” “At least we agree on that.” Jay said. A pause. “I better go,” Adam stood. “I told Oscar I’d meet him for lunch.” “Adam?” Adam looked over his shoulder at Chris. “I know it seems like Jay’s saying stuff you don’t want to hear, but he does have a point.” “I know.” Adam looked over at Jay. “It’s like you said at Christmas; we’ve always given each other advice about our relationships and even though we thought the other was full of shit at the time, it always seemed to work out in the end, right?” Jay nodded. “I’m hoping it’s going to work out for me and Oscar.” “I hope to God it does Adam. I don’t want to see you hurt again.” “I know.” Jay stood and walked to Adam, throwing his arms around him in a friendly embrace. “I don’t know about you,” Chris said, “but I’m thinking ‘threesome’ right now. Wanna do it?” Both Jay and Adam looked at Chris before laughing. “You’re serious?” Mark looked across the table at Glenn as they sat in a Denny’s, the brunch crowd sparse, allowing them a little privacy. Even though they weren’t brothers in real life, after the amount of traveling and rooming together they had done, they both figured they were as close as brothers, which made it easier for Mark to talk things over with him. “Very.” Mark said before taking a drink of his watered down soda. “And when exactly did you come to this epiphany?” “After we spent the night together.” Glenn’s hand froze, his glass hovering between table and mouth. “After you two what? When?” “A few days after the Rumble.” “I thought he was with Guitterez.” “He is.” “So what the hell happened? How did you and Adam get together again?” Glenn lowered his glass. Mark told Glenn the whole story. “Then on Valentine’s Day night I figured why keep lying to myself anymore? I love Adam. I always have.” “If you did, you wouldn’t have married Sara.” “I know.” “So when are you going to drop this little bombshell on Sara?” “Soon.” “How soon?” “She’s going to be here for No Way Out. I figured I’d tell her then.” “I don’t know Mark.” Glenn sighed. “Don’t know what?” “Adam’s with Oscar now. Who’s to say if you go through telling Sara it’s over, you find out it was all for nothing?” “It won’t be for nothing.” “Telling Sara doesn’t mean Adam’s going to dump Oscar for you.” “He might not have much choice.” “Why? You gonna turn stalker on him?” “Nope.” Mark tossed his napkin onto the plate in front of him. “Adam said he’s going to tell Oscar what went down between us and knowing Oscar,” Mark folded his arms and rested them on the table, leaning inward a little. “There’s no way he’s going to forgive Adam for cheating on him.” “You never know. He might.” Mark shook his head. “Nah, never happen. In talking to the WCW contingent here, if there’s one thing Oscar will not tolerate and that’s being cheated on. That’s what killed his relationship with Konnan.” “And what about Sara? You just going to leave her high and dry?” “No. We’ll work something out.” “What you ought to work out is staying married. Sure you still love Adam, but damnit man, he’s moved on and remember,” Glenn pointed at Mark, “you’re the one who wanted to give the marriage thing another try.” “That was when I wanted to marry Adam.” Glenn sighed in irritation. “Man I wish you’d take those damn blinders off and look at the big picture; yeah you and Adam had a night together and I’m sure it blew both your minds, though in your case I think it disintegrated it, but is grasping for another chance with Adam worth the pain you’re going to be causing not only to Oscar and Sara but Adam as well?” “How is my wanting to be with Adam again hurting him?” “You know as well as I do, your relationship with Adam wasn’t all hearts and roses.” Mark shifted in his chair, memories of that time making him uncomfortable. “I know, but things are different now.” “Yeah, because Adam’s trying to move on. Trying to put the past behind him. Okay granted, he may have got caught up with you that night, but he’s not here now, is he? He’s not sitting across this table from you and he won’t be because he’s got someone new in his life and I wish to God you would let him have that Mark. Let him be happy with Oscar the way you’ve been happy with Sara all this time.” “Damnit I want to, but…” “But what?” “But I love Adam so fucking much it hurts.” Mark held up four fingers. “Four years Glenn. You expect me to just forget all about that? Forget everything Adam and I meant to each other?” “No. All I’m asking is get your head out of that haze it’s in and open your eyes. Think with your brain and not with your dick.” “Like you did during the whole thing with Tori and Sean?” Mark fired back. “You couldn’t make up your mind about them either.” “Yeah and they left me. Who’s to say it won’t happen to you too? You break Sara’s heart to be with Adam and Adam might not want you anymore, then where the hell are you going to be? I know this is something you don’t want to hear, but it’s true man; you could wind up being alone because no matter how well thought out your plan may be, something’s always going to come along and throw a wrench into the works.” “I know.” Mark checked his watch. “I have to get going. Sara’s flight’s going to be here in an hour.” He stood to leave. “Just think about this some more? Make sure you know what’s inside the Pandora’s Box you’re going to open if you decide to go through with ending things with Sara.” “I will man,” he and Glenn slapped hands. “Thanks for hearing me out anyways.” “Trust me anything’s better than having to listen to Rob’s philosophy of life.” “See you later.” Mark put his sunglasses on and headed out the door. Waiting for the okay to disembark the plane, Sara twisted her wedding ring. It had been almost two months since she had seen Mark and she was worried. She shook her head. Fuck worried, she was scared shitless. Scared Adam had worked whatever magic he had before to get Mark back and scared of Mark telling her it was over between them. The phone calls she made to keep up with the girls on SmackDown were really snooping missions to find out how things were really going backstage. So far everyone told her the same old, same old; that Mark was behaving himself and Adam and Oscar were a serious couple. So why did she have this pit in her stomach that she knew something wasn’t right? Especially the past couple times Mark called her. She could hear something in his voice when they talked but wasn’t sure what it could’ve been; loneliness? Boredom? Guilt? She sighed. She hated feeling like the shrewish wife checking up on her husband by flying all the way from Texas to Montreal to find out if Mark was cheating on her again. The original plan was for her to wait and head up to Seattle for WrestleMania, but luckily a scheduling fluke at work and her worries about Mark being around Adam convinced her to throw some things in a bag and catch a flight up to Montreal. And hopefully find out what’s really been going on. Finally getting off the plane, Sara walked the hallway, half expecting to find Mark waiting for her at the gate, but didn’t see him until she got over to the luggage carousel, where he was signing autographs for the mob that always found him no matter how hard he tried to disguise himself. Grateful for her own slight anonymity, she got her bag from the carousal and watched Mark sign everything from slips of paper to magazine photos. She felt bad for picking a flight when there would be so many people around, knowing Mark preferred them to make a quick getaway when her plane came. It wasn’t that Mark didn’t like signing autographs or taking photos with fans but he didn’t want her to feel second best to his career, even if he had no problem making her feel second best to Adam. She watched him look in her direction and gave him their signal, a quick wink. She almost laughed as he disentangled himself from the fans, which were now nothing more than a few underdressed groupies, the children and families long gone by now and walked over to where she was standing. “Hi.” He said, his smirk noticeable. She fell in love with him when he smirked at her like that. “Hi,” she returned. “I couldn’t help noticing you standing over here.” “Oh really?” She looked over his shoulder at the seething groupies. It was a familiar game with her and Mark, but it was a fun one to her even after all this time. “Yeah.” He rubbed at his beard. “I was wondering if you had time, maybe we could go have some coffee or whatever you like.” “I don’t know. My mother always told me to stay away from big scary biker types.” “Well, is she somewhere around?” he asked before mouthing, “Are they still watching?” She nodded. “But you know, mother also told me to never travel alone and as you can see, I never listen to what my mother tells me.” “Lucky for me then huh?” He held out his arm. “Shall we?” “I’d love to.” She linked her arm with his and followed him out, handing him her carryon to carry. As they walk by, she could hear one of the girls mutter ‘bitch’, but she didn’t care, having heard it so many times from other groupies before. It wasn’t until they were outside the airport before they both broke out laughing. “Oh man,” she said. “If looks could kill, you’d be a widower there, big man.” He snorted. “Please, like I’m into jailbait.” “And that redheaded one, I’ve seen Stacy wear more fabric during a swimsuit photo shoot than what she was wearing.” “Not to mention the one in the hip huggers.” “Oooh,” Sara shook her head as she and Mark made their way to his rental. “I don’t think they were hip huggers babe. She looked more like the ‘dun lap’ type.” They both chuckled as Mark put Sara’s bags into the trunk. Closing it, he turned and walked into a welcoming embrace from her. She nuzzled Mark’s neck, liking how he smelled, the mixture of his shampoo and cologne just as she remembered and how warm and engulfing his embrace was. Standing there, not caring who was watching, she held onto Mark, wondering how long she would have him. In their hotel room, Adam watched Oscar talk to his family in Spanish, his making out a word here and a phrase there, but didn’t pay much attention to what was being said as he was sat on the sofa trying to figure how to tell Oscar what happened between he and Mark the other night. He went over and over in his head what he was going to say and how he wanted to say it, but nothing sounded right; it was either too blunt or too over dramatic. He sighed at his thoughts, figuring there was no right way to tell Oscar the truth other than to come right out with it. Listening to Oscar laugh at something the person on the other end said, he got up and walked around the room, pausing at the window. And wished he hadn’t when he saw who was out there. Mark…and Sara. He watched them as Mark unloaded the trunk of Sara’s luggage, carrying the suitcase and carryon bag while Sara had her purse on one shoulder and her other arm wrapped around Mark’s waist as though sending him a message whether intentional or not; ‘he’s mine and don’t even think of trying to take him from me’ If she only knew. He wondered why it still hurt so much to see Mark with Sara. Why even though he was in love with Oscar, it still ripped him up to see Mark with her; doting on her the way he had Adam when they were together, sharing the same bed, and… Adam shook his head, not wanting to go there, the images of Mark and Sara making love too much for him. “Mom said hi.” Startled by Oscar’s announcement, Adam turned around and saw Oscar hanging up the phone. “Hi,” he said weakly. “What’s going on?” Oscar walked over to there Adam stood and looked outside. Adam looked down but there was no sign of either Mark or Sara walking around out there. “Nothing,” he moved away. “Just watching some of the people coming in and going out.” “Something wrong?” “No. Why?” “I don’t know, you seem a little distant today.” “Just my neck bothering me.” Adam walked to the bed and sat down. “Want me to rub it down for you?” “No. I’m good.” Oscar watched Adam lie down on the bed and stare up at the ceiling. He couldn’t put his finger on it, but there was something definitely going on with Adam and it had to be more than his neck. He walked over to the bed and stretched out beside Adam. “Amante?” Oscar asked. “Hmmm?” “Can I ask you something?” “Sure.” Adam looked at Oscar. “What?” Oscar looked down at the bedcover before looking back at Adam. “Do you still love me?” Adam blinked. “What? Where did that come from? Of course I love you.” “Don’t bullshit me.” “I’m not.” “Are you still in love with Mark?” “Oscar, where is this coming from?” “Just a vibe I get whenever we’ve been together lately. It’s as though you’re a million miles away and I can’t reach you.” “I’ve just had a lot on my mind.” “Like what? What’s bothering you so much that you can’t talk to me about it?” Adam knew that was the perfect opening, the one he’d wanted and needed to tell Oscar the truth about what happened that night, but seeing the look on Oscar’s face, he knew he couldn’t tell him. Not right then. “I’ve just been worried about things.” “Like what?” “You, me, my neck, the way things are going ass backward backstage. Shit like that.” Oscar heaved a sigh of relief. “You know you can talk to me about that.” “I know but when we’re together like this, I don’t want to even think about the backstage bullshit.” Adam slid an arm under Oscar and turned so they faced each other. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to make you worry.” “Can’t help it.” Oscar pushed Adam’s hair back. “I keep worrying about something coming along and fucking us up. Know what I mean?” Adam did. Too well. “I just don’t like bothering people with my problems.” Adam said weakly, reaching out to touch Oscar’s face. “Your problems are my problems, amante.” Oscar tilted his head forward to kiss Adam. “You should know what hurts you, hurts me too.” “I know.” “I mean if we’re really going to make things work between us, we can’t keep things from each other. We have to be totally up front with each other whether we want to hear it or not?” “Even if it means my telling you to lay off the tacos before going to bed?” Adam joked. “Even if it means -” Oscar paused. “What is that supposed to mean?” Adam tried to keep the laughter in but was having a hard time doing so. “I hate to tell you babe, but I don’t think you’re supposed to let everyone know what you had for dinner every time you fart.” “And I suppose my smelling your breath when you burp is paramount to a romantic encounter?” “Of course,” Adam defended. “How else are you going to know how you taste after I give you head?” “Isn’t kissing you enough?” “Oh no babe, you’ve got to have the full experience and that includes smell.” “Oh yeah?” “Yeah.” “Well experience this then,” Oscar turned Adam onto his back, pinning his arms over my head. “Oh help! Help!” Adam mocked. “I’m being attacked by an over gassed twelve year old.” “Oh yeah?” Oscar ground his crotch against Adam’s. “Does that feel like a twelve year old to you?” Adam tried not to purr. “I wouldn’t know. I’m not Kurt.” “Ha, ha,” Oscar returned, leaning down to kiss Adam, but pausing before he reached Adam’s lips. “If you burp in my mouth, I’ll kick your ass.” Adam laughed before Oscar kissed him. “Mmm,” he purred. “You had hot sauce with something this morning didn’t you?” “Mmm-hmm. Eddie.” Oscar joked as he kissed Adam, who returned in kind. Oscar released Adam’s arms to hold his head in his hands, moving every stray strand of hair out of the way as he did so. Adam lay there, taking in the taste and the feel of Oscar’s mouth and hands. “I love you so much Adam,” Oscar whispered as he moved his lips over to the side of Adam’s neck. “I don’t know what I’d do if I lost you.” Hearing that, the familiar stab of guilt hit Adam full on. He ran his hands down Oscar’s back, but emotionally he couldn’t get into the attempt of lovemaking on Oscar’s part, the concern over telling Oscar what happened with he and Mark weighing heavily on his mind. Something Oscar figured out as well. “Something wrong?” Oscar looked at Adam. Staring up into Oscar’s childlike eyes, Adam tried to find the voice to come out with everything but he couldn’t. “My neck,” he whispered. “It’s starting to act up.” “Why didn’t you say something?” “I didn’t want to ruin the moment.” Adam reached up and ran his hand over Oscar’s shaved head. “This was what I was talking about,” Oscar got off Adam and sat up, tucking one leg under him and bending the other to rest his elbow on. “We can’t keep things from each other.” “It was nothing.” Adam dismissed. “Besides, it wasn’t as though I wasn’t enjoying it.” “I know, but still, if your neck hurts, you should tell me. If you have a problem with my choice in dining, tell me and if you’re still in love with Mark then tell me.” Adam sat up. “What makes you think I’m still in love with Mark?” Now it was Oscar’s turn to be uncomfortable. “I’m sorry. It just slipped out.” “Don’t be sorry.” Adam assured him. “Listen Oscar, I know it hasn’t been easy on either of us since Mark got back, but he’s married to Sara and it looks like he’s not going to leave her anytime soon.” Adam felt his chest tighten with the comment. “So there’s nothing to worry about from him.” At least not right now, Adam thought. “I hate this you know? I hate being suspicious of people and their motives. I mean ever since what happened with me and Carlos, I can’t find myself really getting too close to people again and I fucking hate it.” Adam said nothing, remembering what Oscar had told him about his relationship with Carlos aka “Konnan”. He lay there and let Oscar get his feelings out, knowing if the roles were reversed - and they had been - Oscar would return the favor by listening to him. “I thought when I went to WCW and he was there, everything would be perfect. Not ‘perfect’, perfect but here was someone who was a Latino as well. Someone who could relate to what it was like being Spanish in this business. Someone I thought I could lean on and get some support from, from time to time. Never turns out the way you hope does it?” Oscar played with his sneaker string. “First it was with one of the other luchadores, then he hooked up with the Wolfpac and it was any of them…” Oscar sighed. “I finally got sick of it and left, you know?” Adam nodded. “Went back to doing Indy dates and shows in Japan to forget about him, then I got watching the television one night and I saw you.” “And ran screaming.” Oscar laughed. “Not really. I thought you were the most handsome man I had ever seen. I was nervous about asking you out you know?” Adam nodded. “Eddie and Chavo were telling me I should give it another go. Forget about what Carlos did and move on, but damn I was so scared.” “Why?” “I don’t know. I think it had to do with my learning to trust someone again. To put my feelings and my heart into another person’s hands and worry about having both shredded again. When it came to you, I was worried you might not want to be with me because of your history with Mark, because you might still be carrying a torch for him.” “I’m not.” “I know, but I still feel like I have to keep my guard up and wait for the other shoe to drop.” “You don’t have to.” Adam hated himself for lying like this. “You don’t have to worry about me being like Carlos. If things don’t work out for us, it’s only going to be because we both decide it’s not working.” “And is it? Working for you I mean?” “Yeah,” Adam covered. “It is.” “I’m glad.” “So am I, Oscar,” he reached for the smaller man and pulled him down so he could rest his head on Adam’s chest. “So am I.” Arriving at the arena that afternoon, Sara walked around in the chaotic swarm of activity while Mark went over his match that evening. Saying hi and stopping to talk to everyone along the way, she wandered over to the commissary where some of the wrestlers were sitting around grabbing a late lunch, reading, playing cards, or just relaxing. She looked around on the pretext of finding a seat when she saw him sitting by himself over at a corner table. She took a deep breath and walked over to where he sat. “Hi Oscar.” She greeted. “Mind if I sit down?” “No,” Oscar stood and pulled out a chair for her. “Have a seat.” “Thanks.” She scooted her chair closer to Oscar. “So,” she began, not sure how to word things. “How are things here at SmackDown?” “Chaotic as usual. How’s your job going?” “Pretty busy. I’m lucky I can get enough time to call Mark sometimes.” She looked around the room before asking. “How are you and Adam doing?” “We’re doing okay. Still getting to know each other a little at a time, but I think it’s going to work out for me this time.” “I’m glad. You two really are cute together.” Oscar laughed. “That’s what everyone says.” “And you believe them.” “Of course.” Sara chuckled. “I don’t blame you.” Another awkward moment passed. “I never had the chance to say how sorry I was the baby thing didn’t work out.” Oscar said. “Not that I’d call a baby a thing but -” Sara held up her hand. “I know what you mean and thank you, but never fear, I can have one any time Mark and I are ready.” “Are you? Ready I mean?” Sara looked at him. “Is there a hidden meaning to that question?” Oscar sighed. “I won’t lie to you Sara, I’m worried about Mark being around Adam as much as he is.” “You’re not the only one.” “How do you cope with it though? With him on the road and with Adam here on the same roster…?” “I just have to trust Mark.” She looked at her left hand where her simple band of gold was. “I just have to believe him when he says it’s over between them.” “But you don’t think it is.” “Tell you the truth Oscar, no, I don’t. It hurt like hell when I asked him about Adam and he admitted everything to me.” “How did you find out?” “He said Adam’s name in his sleep one night. I asked who ‘Adam’ was, not knowing it was Adam Copeland and Mark told me about them; about their history and how they were still together while he was on the road.” “And you didn’t divorce him?” “I thought about it, I mean I heard from Debra and a couple of the other girls how while their husbands were on the road, they let them have a lover but I never understood why. Why let someone who swore to love you and only you go out and let someone else into their bed, even if it is while they’re on the road. I even asked Mark that question, even though I know their relationship took place long before he and I met.” “What did he tell you?” “He talked about how unless you’re in the business and go through what he does for a living, there would be no way to really understand why some of the boys turn to each other for ‘comfort’,” Sara air-quoted. “He talked about how the other guy knows what it’s like to be sore and tired and worn out and how some of the wives - not that he’s blaming the female gender - expect them to be all perky and healthy when they come home. I told him I wasn’t naïve; I knew how hard it was for the guys injury and traveling wise, I just couldn’t understand why they needed each other that way. Know what I mean?” Oscar nodded. “And what did he tell you when you asked him that?” Sara sighed. “He told me during all the traveling and sharing hotel rooms, feelings do come out and sometimes you act on them without a second thought. Sometimes it’s only for one night and other times, they wind up turning into something more. Then there was the mini bombshell he dropped while we were first dating that he was bisexual.” She chuckled. “Maybe that should’ve been the first red flag to tell me things weren’t going to go so smoothly, but I thought I could handle it. He was choosing to be with me after all, right?” A beat. “But when he told me about he and Adam, I realized I couldn’t handle it as well as I thought and the thoughts of divorce did pop up again, but the baby scare happened and I never gave it another thought. Even after it came back false, I never gave divorcing Mark another thought. Besides, I love the big lug too damn much to let him go.” “Yeah he seems to have that affect on people.” Oscar said. “It’s not that I’m slamming you, Adam or any of the other here who are gay; that’s another issue I’m not going to touch. I just can’t understand why, when you marry someone, that that person isn’t enough for you. That you have to turn to someone else for ‘comfort’.” “Like you said, the traveling and the working conditions make strange bedfellows out of people. Look at Steve; he was married when he and Debra were working together, and Paul ended things with Joanie when he and Stephanie worked together with the McMahon-Helmsley era. It’s just this business is so inclusive, sometimes outside relationships seem like an intrusion.” “I guess I can see your point there.” Sara admitted. “It’s just I was raised an old fashioned kind of girl. That once you’re married, you stay faithful. No matter what. I just have a hard time figuring out what it is Adam offered Mark that I can’t.” “I don’t think it’s anything about what one offers that the other doesn’t. I think it has more to do with history. Adam and Mark had those near four years together and everything about who they are is sort of entangled with one another. I’m only hoping it doesn’t take that long for me and Adam to be the same way.” Sara smiled. “You really love Adam don’t you?” Oscar nodded. “More than anyone will ever know.” “I’m glad. Really I am.” “Thanks. And don’t give up on Mark. I’m sure once he realizes Adam’s moved on, he’ll get his head straight.” “Oh I don’t plan on giving him up,” Sara said. “Not without a fight.” “Tell him yet?” Adam paused in getting his gear out of the bag when he heard Mark’s question. He looked over and saw the larger man standing in the doorway, people walking to and from their destinations behind him. “Tell Sara?” Adam returned, hating the way he felt whenever Mark was around. “Not yet.” “Same here.” “I thought you were so hot to tell him about us.” “I was.” “But?” “I don’t see what concern it is of yours.” Mark walked into the room, the door closing behind him. “I meant what I said about my leaving Sara for you.” “And I meant what I said about my not wanting to be the reason.” Adam took his shirt off. “Like I said, you may not care about Sara’s feelings, but I do care about Oscar’s and I’m not going to hurt him because you finally decided to do something about what you shouldn’t have done a couple years ago.” Mark folded his arms across his chest, some of Glenn’s words coming back to him. “So…what? You don’t want to be with me anymore?” Adam held an “Edge Army” shirt in his hands. “I’ve wanted to be with you for so fucking long Mark.” He looked over at the big man. “Just you and me, like you promised we would.” “And you’re getting that.” Mark said softly. “You’re getting what you’ve always wanted.” “But the thing is, I don’t want it anymore. I don’t want the lies and the secrecy and the hiding and the hurting. I know we have to keep things secret for work and we have to be careful when we do any appearances. That I’m used to. But who’s to say after you divorce Sara and a year or two have passed, you wouldn’t get that urge to want to have a family and break my heart again to find yourself another woman to do that with? Hmm? How do I know that?” “You have to trust me.” “I did that once before and look what happened.” Mark rubbed at the bridge of his nose. “What do I have to do to prove I mean it this time? That I want to be with you?” “I don’t want you to prove anything to me. I just want you to let me move on. Just like I’m trying to let you move on with Sara.” “That’s the thing Adam. I can’t move on.” “Then that’s something you’re going to have to work on. Because I’m not going to hurt Oscar by dumping him for some pipe dream that might never come true.” Adam returned his attention to his bag, taking out his tights and boots, laying them to one side before he was startled by the touch of Mark’s hand on his arm. He turned to shake it off, but was greeted by the feel of Mark’s lips on his. He tried to move away, but the part of him that longed for the warmth and the feel of Mark wouldn’t allow it and it was this part Adam listened to as he wrapped his arms around Mark’s neck; Mark wrapping his arms around Adam’s waist, the hands sliding down to cup and caress Adam’s ass through the jeans he was wearing. Without realizing it, he felt Mark pick him up and before he knew it, found himself seated on one of the sinks in the bathroom area of the dressing room. He pulled his head back and looked at Mark. “We can’t…” “We can.” Mark’s hand went to the fly of Adam’s jeans, unbuttoning the top button before doing so to the other buttons that were there, but was stopped by Adam, who grabbed hold of his hands. “I don’t want to hurt Oscar like this.” “But?” Adam looked into Mark’s eyes as though they were daring him to contradict what he was feeling right then and the realization hit Adam hard. The realization Adam tried to deny but couldn’t any longer. He closed his eyes and rested his head on Mark’s shoulder. “I still love you,” he admitted, his voice a harsh whisper, tears burning in his eyes as he looked at Mark. “God help me but I still love you.” “I love you too.” Mark pressed his lips onto Adam’s. “I’ll always love you.” He said before slipping his tongue inside. “You’re sure this will work for us this time?” Adam asked when the kiss broke. Mark looked at Adam. “I’ll make damn sure it will.” He raised a hand to Adam’s face. “You’re all I’ve ever wanted Adam. All I’ve needed.” Losing his voice in that second, Adam responded the best way he could by kissing Mark. Feeling Mark’s hands make another try for his button fly, Adam stopped him again. “No, not here. Not now.” “Why?” “Because the guys’ll be coming in to start changing soon and that includes Oscar.” Adam watched Mark bow his head before sighing. “You’re right.” Mark straightened. “So what are we going to do about our situation? I’ll tell Sara tonight if you tell Oscar.” Adam hesitated, remembering how vulnerable Oscar was when he had discussed what he’d been through and how he felt for Adam. “I need some time…” Adam whispered. “That’s something we don’t have much of, Devil Baby,” Mark said, using the nickname he’d given Adam when they met. “I just…I just can’t throw this at him.” Adam stammered. “I…I have to break it to him gently.” “Okay then. WrestleMania. We’ll give each other until then. If not…” Mark shrugged. “We end things between us. For good.” “Okay.” Adam nodded, hating himself. “WrestleMania.” Another quick kiss and Adam slid off the sink before following Mark out to the changing area. Making sure the coast was clear, the person, who’d hidden away in the lavatory when he heard Mark and Adam enter, slipped out and could only stand there in shock and disappointment over what he had heard. Damnit Adam, he thought. How the hell could you do this? How?