Do Unto Others By Temptation Eyes

Chapter One...Watching, Waiting

Adam eyed the young man as he ate his meal. He was smiling and listening intently to the others sitting at the table with him. His green- gold eyes fixing on whomever was speaking, his head occasionally tilted to one side when something particularly interesting or perhaps perplexing was said. Adam had a full plate of food before himself, but ate few bites, chewing automatically when he did, not tasting the food on his tongue. He had no interest with those at his own table, who responded to his lack of involvement in their conversation in kind. His own greenish eyes flickered over the younger man, his face, his form. The delicate grace of even the simplest of his moments. His hands, like those of an artist, the nimble fingers gripped his silverware like some kind of artisans tools. The muscles rippled slightly under his smooth skin with every movement. The thin, sharp lines of his eyebrows and the painstakingly detailed curves of what little facial hair the young man allowed. He eyes traced the delicate curve of his upper lip and the slightly putty fullness of the lower. Adam’s stomach fluttered when the other man’s pink tongue snaked out to reclaim a crumb from those tempting lips. His now iridescent blue hair pulled back into a sloppy looking bun on the back of his head, a few of the unruly azure strands falling to skim the bare skin on the back of his neck, just below the abstract patterns shaved into his lower scalp, and shoulders, like-wise bared by the simple white tank top he wore. His unusual taste in clothing present in his pants- neon orange tiger-striped- and those clunky black boots he loved to wear. A few more strands fell over his forehead, a few of those reaching down to his eyes. Occasionally, he brushed at them, not bothering with it any further than that. Now, he laughed lightly at some amusing thing one of the other men had said. Briefly, Adam felt a twinge of curiosity at what had made the beautiful man laugh. Jeff Hardy was one of his very good friends, and Adam had always felt a bit in awe of the man who was just barely past being a boy, even if he was twenty-four and a, so called, adult. Years in the business had not jaded him in the slightest the way it might have others. The way it had Adam himself. His cool confidence in himself was something Adam had craved for his own. Oh, to be that free, to know just exactly who you are and what you are, and not care what anyone else thought. Of course, it is not so easy for all of us. Adam was not sure if he knew who he was, or even who he wanted to be, and he was a few years older than the Hardy. Jeff was still the same energetic kid he was when Adam had first met him. He reminded Adam, as the cliche goes, of himself when he was younger. No, Adam Copeland had never dyed his all the shades of the rainbow, nor had he dressed in funky, punky clothing the likes of which Jeff Hardy sported. It was more of an internal aspect, and innocence, maybe even a naivety he had. Jeff’s easy way, coupled with his passion for life drew people to him like moths. And if ever Adam saw a flame in his life, Jeff Hardy was that flame. Adam wasn’t quite sure when he’d suddenly began spending so much time thinking about this, maybe it had started the moment they had met. He also wasn’t quite sure when he’d begun distancing himself from the rest of the group. He should have been sitting at that table, maybe next to the very person he spent so much time pondering in his mind, joining the friendly conversation like he had for years. But something had been happening to him. He didn’t know how long it had been going on, but he knew it was happening. He let his eyes roam over the young man freely. He felt a dark heat inside himself. He wasn’t certain what it was, or what it meant, but he felt he needed to appease it. With his love of life, and the easy friendship he’d given Adam so readily, Jeff Hardy was the cause, Copeland knew that much. Maybe, then, Jeff Hardy was also the cure. Before he knew it, the occupants of the table stood, Jeff with them, and began clearing their places. Matt said something to him, gesturing to Jason. Adam felt a twinge of longing. Jason was still the one Adam thought of as his best friend, but they weren’t as close as they used to be, and it didn’t have anything to do with the on-air break up of E&C, though that helped him keep his distance. Adam had to admit to himself that he missed his relationship with Jay, he just didn’t really know what to do about it. With the thoughts he was having, he wasn’t sure he was the same person who Jay had grown up with. All the uncertainty he felt made him draw further and further into himself, and the more he drew away from the people he cared about, and who cared about him, the stronger that dark heat within him became, seeping into his soul and spreading like cancer. If he didn’t do something about it soon, like cancer, it would kill him. Or his soul at least. He watched the men leave. Or more to the fact, he watched Jeff leave with them. They dropped their trash in the can and trouped out the double doors leading in and out of the dining area. The WWF’s catered meals seemed to always go to waste on Adam, since he never ate much, and now spent his time studying the younger of the Hardy Boyz more than anything else. He sighed and stood, muttering a good-bye to his table-mates and tossing his trash away. Jeff was standing alone in the hallway. He leaned against the wall, drinking water from a bottle. Adam watched from a little ways away as the young Hardy, with head tilted back and lovely eyes closed, gulped down the cool liquid. He was out of breath from his match, which had been against Scotty Too Hotty. Adam had marveled right along with the marks at the high spots Jeff managed in the match. After the Vengeance PPV, when the Hardyz had had their match, which was supposedly going to cause the long awaited break up of Team Xtreme, but instead caused them to have an epiphany of sorts, the brothers had been having more singles matches than tag team bouts for the first time in their careers as actual WWF Superstars. Not only were they having more singles matches, but they were getting back to the insane spots they used to pull when just starting to make a name for themselves among the fans. Adam’s eyes took in every detail of the young stud, as J.R. liked to say. His skin was flushed and shined with sweat, which dripped in little trails down his amazing body. He wore no shirt, having pealed the skin-tight garment off and tossing it to the crowd during the match, much to the delight of the frenzied fans. His well formed chest and flat stomach heaved and contracted as he swallowed, taking shallow breaths of air every few gulps. The ring through his navel glinted in the hall light. His fingernails, as always, were painted some near-black color, which was chipping. That gorgeous blue hair was loose now, as Adam had found he preferred it to be, and was dark with sweat, clinging to his skin in a delicious way. His black cargos hung enticingly low on his hips, the band of his underwear was showing a good inch or two at least. The black and white, spat-like patterned boots he wore to the ring completed the picture. Copeland eyed the Hardy’s Adam’s apple as he swallowed. He didn’t know why, but it seemed anything physical about this man drew his attention like a magnet, even the simplest of motions and attributes. The curve of his throat, the swing of his hips when he walked, his ears, his wrists, the way he lounged in a chair, all this and everything and anything else filled Adam’s senses and kept him endlessly enthralled. The dark heat craved the sensory input obtained from even the most pedestrian encounter with the man. Adam worried about himself. The darkness in him was the strongest it had ever been, and it felt as though it would overcome and consume him at any moment these days. For years he had been able to fend it off. It had only really affected him when he was alone at night, curled in his bed, or even at times on the floor, hugging his arms, knees drawn up. He was a grown man cowering and empty in those times. A waking nightmare he had to contend with, but he had dealt with it. Until he had met Jeff Hardy, that is. Now, he was afraid of what might happen if he wasn’t so very careful. He kept the dark heat at bay, but he was only so strong. He knew, eventually it would win out. And God help him when it did. Jeff opened his eyes. He looked about him, his green-gold eyes falling on Adam. He smiled. Adam felt a flash of warmth at the friendly grin. He really did like Jeff. He was an amazing person. He walked towards the younger man. Suddenly, he regretted his decision. Every step closer to his young friend and colleague, the feeling of foreboding grew. On the outside, though, he was just plain old Adam, same as he ever was, a small smile to match Jeff’s on his own sensual lips. “Hey,” he said, simply. Jeff nodded in greeting. “What’s up?” he asked. The little North Carolina accent like velvet on Adam’s eardrums. Jeff’s voice made his ears feel the way he imagined a cat felt when lovingly stroked by a caring owner. Adam shrugged. “Nothing much, you?” The words flowed easily. If he only knew, Adam mused darkly. He didn’t like the way he was feeling inside, but couldn’t fight it back. “Not much either,” he told his friend. “You going with the guys tonight?” “No,” he said. He hadn’t even been invited, had no idea when or where they were going that night. The fact stung somewhat, despite the fact that he usually declined when they did ask now a days. He was starting to lose his place in the group. This scared him. The prospect that he had alienated his friends to the point where they no longer wanted his company bothered him a great deal, as did the thought of how much time he would be spending alone without the comfort of his friends to keep the dark at bay. “Yeah, me either,” Jeff stated, wrinkling his nose at the thought, looking thoroughly adorable for a moment. Adam’s smile widened slightly. He was about to ask Jeff if maybe they could do something together that night. Just hang or whatever. It had been a while since they had done that, and Adam missed the easy closeness. “You don’t have, like, a date do you?” Adam smirked in response. “Yeah, Jeffro. Hot date. Rosie Palm’s about the only one I can find these days.” He grinned at the blush that crept into Jeff’s already somewhat flushed cheeks. “Awe,” Adam cooed, like an adoring grandmother. “Look at little Jeffery blush! Aren’t you just precious?!” He punctuated the last word by reaching out to pinch on of his friend’s cheeks. Jeff’s blush deepened and he batted Adam’s hand away. Copeland chuckled as Jeff grinned shyly. “Well, you have been avoiding us all lately, I figured a chick would explain a lot,” the younger man reasoned. Adam chewed his bottom lip, thinking about that statement. “Avoiding you guys? Have I been?” he asked, feigning disbelief. Jeff nodded, though his expression and voice were a little uncertain when he spoke. “Well, it seems that way,” he said. Adam shook his head. “Nah, I’ve just been busy, and tired. It’s not that I haven’t been going out with you guys, I haven’t been going out at all. I’ve been doing a lot of thinking these days, you know?” he explained. It was partly true, but the part that was left out was the most important, and worrisome. Jeff nodded his understanding. “Then, if you can tear Rosie away, you wanna hang out or something tonight?” he said, grinning mischievously. Adam smirked at the comment. “I don’t know, kido,” he said, knowing full well, Jeff did not liked the be called that. “She’s very demanding.” Jeff shook his head, laughing lightly the way Adam had seen him do earlier in the dining area, and countless times before, though it still affected him the same way no matter how many time he witnessed it. He grinned. “Funny,” Jeff said. “But really, you want to?” Before he could stop himself, Adam nodded. “Sure.” Jeff’s eyes seemed to light up the slightest bit. Adam knew he hadn’t imagined it, he just didn’t know what it meant. He liked it though, that Jeff was so happy, for whatever reason, to be spending time with him. The darkness liked it, too, which worried Adam. Just then, Matt rounded the corner, smiling when he saw his brother and friend. Adam waved a greeting to him as he neared the pair. “Hey, Copeland,” he said genially. He patted Adam’s bare shoulder, as Adam, too, was in his ring gear, his match had not yet occurred that night. “We’re all heading out to a club after the show, coming? Or you gonna be a stick in the mud, like my little brother here? Wild one, my ass.” Matt added with a disgusted look that dissolved into a grin. Jeff only rolled his eyes, slurping down the last of his water. The way he’d said it, the familiar, casual tone meant a lot to Adam. He hadn’t been burning his bridges. Not quite yet. He’d been getting out the matches, though, he knew that. If he didn’t figure it out soon, he really would lose his friends. He shook his head at the darker Hardy. “Nope, you’re looking at a pair of sticks here, Matt. I’m just as firmly stuck in the mud, I’m afraid.” Matt shook his head, giving Adam the same disgusted look he’d shown Jeff. Then he shrugged. “Okay. See you in the morning then,” he said. Adam nodded. “We’re all gonna go out to breakfast at IHOP.” Matt grinned happily. Adam allowed a small laugh at the man’s childlike enthusiasm. Matt just loved going out for breakfast. Especially if they could find a place with chocolate chip pancakes to go with his chocolate milk. He was usually very good with his nutrition, but you get him in a Perkins, Ponderosa, IHOP, Bob Evans, and he turned back into a crayon coloring, straw-paper shooting five year old. And, if all else failed, he always, always left with a cookie in his hand. It was an endearing trait, though. “I wouldn’t miss it,” Adam assured him. Matt smiled and patted Jeff’s side before continuing on down the hall with a wave good-bye. Adam looked back to Jeff. An uncomfortable silence, the first he could remember ever having with the man, passed between them. Jeff shifted from foot to foot and scratched his stomach. Adam decided it was time to go. He had a match anyway. He told Jeff he’d catch him later at the hotel, and headed off for yet another match with Test, though his mind was definitely not on the former bouncer. The darkness pulsed low in him like a heart beat, only far more sinister, and insistent.

Chapter Two...Sinister Urges

Adam and Jeff sat on the floor in front of the two twin beds in the hotel room he and Matt were, as was the norm, sharing. On the television was some bad horror movie involving zombies and weird leach-like creatures. They chatted back and forth, trying to decide just what the movie was about. It was about half over and they still hadn’t figured it out. Adam wore a T-shirt and jeans, simplicity itself. Jeff, on the other hand, wore a white wife-beater, trimmed in red, which made the seems resemble a candy cane. He wore baggy black pants, with glittery blue slashes randomly placed all over them. No shoes, barefooted, his toenails painted to match the ones on his fingers.. His hair was once again up in that beautifully sloppy bun, a pesky strand kept falling in his eyes, tempting Adam to brush it back behind the delicate arch of his ear. He often wondered just how Jeff managed to pull off looking so alluring, at any time, and still seem so pure. Jeff laughed at a comment Adam made about the leaches in the movie and Vince’s ass. He gave the older man a playful shove, which Adam returned in kind. He put a bit more force into it than Jeff had, though, which knocked the smaller man over. They both laughed. Then, Jeff whirled on Adam, pouncing like a blue-haired panther, he suddenly tackled the tall blonde to the floor. Adam grunted with the force of the impact. Jeff’s quiet, gentle manner cleverly concealed the strength he truly had. He pinned Adam to the floor on his stomach, trying to lock the larger man’s wrists behind his back. However, though it was easy to forget just how strong Jeff really was, Adam Copeland was still stronger by a good margin. He quickly bucked the Hardy Boy off his back, and reversed their positioned, he kneeled over Jeff’s back, and batted mildly, harshly at the back of his head, knocking the bundle of hair loose. “Heeeyyy!!” Jeff whined. Adam laughed and backed off. Jeff sat up and straightened his clothes, running his fingers through his hair and quickly reforming the messy bun. He pouted at Adam, his delectable bottom lip pushed out. “Awe, poor baby,” Copeland cooed, ruffling the newly straightened hair. Jeff batted his hand away, and scowled playfully at his friend, sticking out that pink tongue. Like some kind of wave, the darkness surged up in Adam with frightening force. His eyes narrowed, his teeth clenched almost painfully. “Don’t make promises you can’t keep,” he said. His voice was soft, but intense, making Jeff’s eyes go wide. The smaller man gaped at him in a mixture of shock and confusion , his mouth hanging open the slightest bit. “What? I don’t...” Jeff’s brows bunched, his eyes questioning Adam silently. Copeland felt a heat flood him, calming his senses, removing his doubts. He reached forward and slipped his hand around the back of Jeff’s neck, drawing him close as he moved towards his young friend. He didn’t speak, didn’t give any warning of what he was about to do. He pressed his lips to the soft sweetness of Jeff’s, taking in the whole experience like a sponge to water. He felt the younger man tense and try to pull back, but the bed behind him, and Adam’s hand firmly cupping the back of his head prevented his escape for the moment. Adam’s own tongue flicked over the dry lips, wetting them with his saliva, tasting his friend. But the lips didn’t not part. Not to be denied, Adam’s other hand came up, his thumb forcing Jeff’s chin down, opening the small cavern of his mouth to Copeland. His tongue stole into it, running softly over the moistness of the Hardy’s inner cheeks, flicking the roof of his mouth, finally probing the other man’s sweet tongue. Jeff gasped into Adam’s mouth, his tongue beginning to move against the older man’s hesitantly. Adam growled and tilted his head to the side, plunging his tongue deep into the younger man’s mouth, ravaging it without regard. Jeff’s hands were on his shoulders, pushing him back. Trying to push him away. Suddenly, the realization of what he was doing struck Adam like a bucked of ice water. He pulled back from Jeff so fast he stumbled back onto his ass. He stared at the younger man in horror at what he’d done. Jeff’s hair was disheveled once more, blue strands hanging down in chaos. His eyes were wide in fear, astonishment, and perplexity. He hands were planted firmly on the carpet, his muscles straining as he pressed his back against the bed. Adam noticed his mouth, hanging open. His lips were wet, rosy and swollen from the rough kiss that had been force on them. “Oh, God,” he choked out. He felt as though he were going to faint. He jumped up to his feet, and bolted for the door. “Adam!” Jeff called to him. Adam, stopped in the now open doorway, and looked back at his friend. Jeff had not stood, but was kneeling in front of the bed, one hand resting on it, his eyes confused and compelling. “Jeff,” Adam forced out. “I’m so sorry, man.” Before the blue-haired man could say anything else, Adam had slammed the door behind him and flown down the hallway to the elevator, jamming the buttons frantically, like that could make it go faster, afraid that Jeff would follow him into the hall in search of answers he couldn’t give. Once in his room, Adam went for the bathroom and splashed cold water on his face, bending over the sink, trying to steady himself. He couldn’t bare to look at his reflection in the mirror. He went back to the main room, not bothering to turn of the bathroom light, and flopped back onto the bed. He sat up and tossed his shirt off. His skin felt so hot, he was suffocating in the light clothing. He reached for his zipper, horrified to find the prominent bulge. The encounter had given him an erection. His fingers felt like ice, and he couldn’t bring himself to remove the now uncomfortably tight jeans. He threw an arm over his eyes, and ground his teeth together in rage and frustration. It hurt, ached within him. He was losing control, and it scared him to death. The darkness pulsed in him still, more insistent somehow. It had tasted freedom and craved more. He rolled onto his stomach, pulling the pillow tightly into his arms. He felt the hot tears burning behind his eyes and let them fall. He cried into the hotel room pillow, his body convulsing with harsh sobs. He hiccuped and coughed and cried on for a good long while. The pain and fear that plagued him for so long holding him full in its grasp. He couldn’t stop the choking wails that were muffled by the pillow no matter how he tried. His mind raced, horrible memories that never seemed to stay buried took over, playing in his head. He couldn’t comprehend what was happening to him. Why was he acting this way? And why had he forced that kiss on Jeff? Jeff didn’t deserve that! He was kind, and compassionate, with his gentle innocence. As Adam had been when he was younger. As Adam had been when Ryan... It took so long to remember just what happened. I was so young and vestal then, you know it hurt me, but I'm breathing so I guess I'm still alive even if signs seem to tell me otherwise. I've got my hands bound, my head down, my eyes closed, and my throat wide open. He screamed into the pillow, shaking violently. Slowly, numbness consumed his tormented mind, bit by bit, then his body followed in suit. He stared into the shadows of his hotel room, not seeing, not hearing, not feeling, not caring. Was he breathing even? It didn’t matter. His eyes felt heavy, and it didn’t matter if he closed them, so he let them fall. An exhausted sleep claimed him, filling him with a blissful black, somehow so different from the heated darkness that plagued his consciousness. When he awoke, he found it was about three am. He rolled onto his back, the numbness fading as his became more and more awake. He sat up, then stood, running his fingers through his tangled blonde tresses. He went to the bathroom, and washed his tear stained face. The darkness was back with a vengeance. He wondered, not for the first time in his life, whether it wouldn’t be easier just to end it all right here. But he always found some reason to go on, much to his regret at times. He still could not look at himself in the mirror. He thought about Jeff. What was he doing now? Sleeping? Sitting up, trying to figure out just what had happened between himself and Adam? Having a drink? That idea appealed to Adam. Now he felt like going out and getting drunk, if only he had gone out with the rest of the group and not stayed in that night. That would have stopped this night from happening. Or would it? He didn’t really believe that. The darkness was too persistent. If not tonight, it would have happened eventually, it was inevitable. He ran his hands over his face. This was driving him insane. He needed some kind of release from the torment of his mind, his soul. As he went back into the room, knock sounded at his door. It nearly caused him to jump out of his skin. Who in the Hell would... A thought came to him. The others surely had to be back by now. Jeff, would he have told... What if that was Matt at the door, demanding an explanation from him about what he’d done to Matt’s baby brother? Adam’s mouth went dry and he licked his parched lips, to no avail. He waited, hoping if he didn’t answer they would go away. The knock came again, it was a bit louder. This made Adam realize that the first knock had not been very loud at all. Hesitant was a more accurate description. If it had been Matt Hardy, he would have been pounding away at the door to wake the dead. Adam moved towards the door, placing one cold shaking hand on the wood and peering out the peep hole. He gasped in shock. It was Jeff! He was still wearing the clothes he’d had on, which suggested he had not been to bed that night. His arms were crossed and Adam saw a look of trepidation on his face. Trepidation and determination. One thing everyone knew of Jeff Hardy, when he made up his mind to do something, it got done. Adam, stepped back, trying to clear his head. He knew Jeff was not going to leave until he opened the door. He’d sit in the hall all night if needs be. What in the Hell was he going to tell the younger man when he asked for answers? He wasn’t even sure himself what he was doing or why. Anther knock, more insistent and longer this time. He resigned himself, he was stuck. He flicked on the light. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath and opened the door. Jeff looked up at him, his eyes, though questioning, were calm. Adam took in the sight. Jeff looked just the same as when Adam had left his room. He hadn’t even put on his shoes. He looked just as tempting, making the darkness swell and pulse, clouding Adam’s mind as it had before. He felt no worry now, no doubt. It was like his screaming mind had settled quietly under the cover of the soothing darkness that warmed him now. It seeped into his eyes again, seeing Jeff standing there, so innocent, so pure. “Adam, I think we need to talk,” Jeff stated firmly. The corner of the tall blonde’s mouth quirked up in a slight half smile. He nodded. “I agree,” he said, his voice going soft, and intense once more. Jeff looked slightly uncomfortable under his odd gaze. He shifted his weight, and waited for Adam to say more. The larger man stepped back, gesturing for his friend to come inside. Jeff stepped into the room, brushing past Adam. He headed to the window, stopping to look back at his friend. The door clicked shut with an odd sound of finality.

Chapter Three...Violence and Pain

“Adam, what exactly is going on?” he asked, the tone laced with a soft plea. Adam shrugged. “I’m not exactly sure, Jeff,” he said. He voice was calm, soft, not sinister in the slightest, but he still observed the way Jeff tensed up even more. It made him feel good, some how. “Why are you all the way over there? Afraid of me?” Do unto others that which has been done to you. Jeff’s eyes darted to Adam’s. He blushed. The feeling of calm, pleasure increased a bit. “No,” the smaller man said. Adam chuckled. Jeff frowned slightly, and moved to stand before his friend. This was just the effect he was hoping for. He leaned close, his face mere inches from Jeff’s. The younger man did not back off. “I think you are,” he said, his voice velvety smooth now. He stepped to the side, his moves gracefully intimidating, like a stalking cat’s. He slowly circled his friend, his prey. I'm treading water, I need to sleep a while. My lamb and martyr, you look so precious. Won't you come a bit closer, close enough so I can smell you. I need you to feel this, I can’t stand to let it burn too long. He leaned in so close he felt his own breath flow back to him off of Jeff’s soft skin. He inhaled the younger man’s scent. It filled his senses, and coursed through him like a drug. Even though they weren’t touching, he felt Jeff shiver. He reached up and lay his hands on the Hardy’s hips. Jeff jumped, but did not try to pull away. Adam smiled darkly. He moved in, brushing his lips over the sensitive skin of Jeff’s neck. He didn’t kiss it, only nuzzled it, moving his lips over the flesh lightly. Jeff gasped, and arched his neck up towards Adam’s mouth like a cat. Adam smiled. He licked his lips and slipped his thumbs under the waistband of Jeff’s pants. He leaned in and placed one soft kiss on the warm, fragrant skin. Then, he bit down cruelly, causing Jeff to jump and yelp in shocked pain. The younger man wrenched himself from his supposed friend’s grasp and moved away a few steps, his hand going to his neck instinctively, finding deep bite marks, saliva, but no blood. He gawked at Adam, too shocked to speak. “Awe, did I hurt you, baby?” Adam asked. Jeff backed away, fear coming off him in waves, affecting Adam in a way he’d never experienced. “Come here, I’ll kiss it and make it all better.” Jeff whirled and race for the door, but Adam was faster. He caught the younger man, and pinned him against the wall mere feet from his escape. He ran his hands down Jeff’s back, cupping his ass possessively, kneading it through his pants. Jeff tried to push off the wall, but Adam forced him full against it. He spread the smaller man’s legs apart, and placed his own feet on the inner sides of Jeff’s to keep him from closing them. He rubbed his erection rudely against the blue-haired man’s rear end. Jeff shivered as Adam gently kissed the injury he’d created only seconds ago. He blew softly on the wound. Jeff released a small, mewling plea. Adam pulled his shirt loose and slid his hands under the garment, caressing Jeff’s taut skin. He bunched the material in one hand, looping it through the shoulder straps as well. He bent and kissed the small of Jeff’s back. Then, his hot tongue came out to lap at the salty skin. Jeff shuddered as he tasted the skin just above his waist band. Adam placed one hand on the other man’s shoulder, holding him firmly in place. He licked a trail up his back, pausing when he reached the bunching of fabric in his hand. He pressed Jeff harder against the wall with his one hand, and yanked at the shirt. Jeff yelped again. It tore easily, coming away from the tanned skin in a tattered mess. He tossed it away. His hands momentarily explored the exposed skin greedily. “Adam, please,” Jeff begged. His voice was soft, scared. Released in this sodomy. For one sweet moment I am whole. Do unto you now what has been done to me. “Why are you doing this?” he pleaded, looking back at the older man over his shoulder. Adam responded by pressing his body full against Jeff’s, letting him feel his heat and, once again, his erection. “Precious,” he whispered into the younger man’s ear, tracing the arch with the tip of his tongue. Adam thought of Jeff. He was so pure, so innocent. Uncorrupt. Unaware. Like Adam had been when he was younger. Adam envied Jeff his naivety, craved it for himself. He hated him for it, wanted to take it away. He moved his hand around, shoving it roughly into the younger man’s pants, claiming his cock. He found it was semi-erect. He smirked. “Look at this. So sweet, like a little angel, Adam. But look, you’re getting hard, aren’t you?” Ryan had told him that when he’d seen Adam’s own young member. He heard the older boy’s words as though they’d been spoken. He’d stolen Adam’s innocence, and replaced it with nightmares and the darkness. Now, he had a baby of his own. His own little angel to cast down. He buried his nose in Jeff’s hair, stroking him slowly, gently. Jeff writhed in front of him, trying to escape. Adam groaned when Jeff pushed back against him, rubbing his sweet little ass against Adam’s hard cock, which was demanding attention. He envisioned himself pulling Jeff’s pants off. That smooth, round little bottom of his. He ached to bury himself within the little angel. He craved the escape from his own tormented soul. You're breathing so I guess you're still alive even if signs seem to tell me otherwise. Won't you come just a bit closer, close enough so I can smell you. I need you to feel this.I need this to make me whole. There's release in this sodomy. For I am your witness that blood and flesh can be trusted. And only this one holy medium brings me piece of mind. Got your hands bound, your head down, your eyes closed. You look so precious now. “Precious,” he whispered. Jeff was crying, he could feel him hiccup. He was cold, so cold against Adam’s hot skin. Shaking. Had he been this way with Ryan? A cold sliver of memory seeped into his mind, creeping along his raw nerves. “Oh, little angel. I need this, you understand don’t you?” He hadn’t understood, but he did now. He needed Jeff. Needed Jeff’s innocence to take away his own corruption, his own darkness. It made no sense, but some how it made perfect sense. He understood what he was doing now, and why. Jeff whimpered. Adam felt that cold skin, heard him weep. He understood what Jeff felt, too. The memory of his own violation slithered around his mind. Finally coming to his eyes. He didn’t see Jeff anymore, he saw himself, terrified, humiliated, crying on the ground, Ryan walking away and leaving him there broken. The pain, mental and physical, had almost driven him to take his own life then, but he’d backed out like he would in the future also. But it wasn’t himself he was destroying, it was Jeff. Jeff Hardy who’d never given him anything but trust and friendship. Jeff Hardy, beautiful, gentle, caring, clean, Jeff Hardy. The darkness pulsed within him, rising like a tidal wave. He needed this! He had to have some peace! It was him or Jeff! Show me something Thought I could make it end Thought I could wash the stains away Thought I could break the circle if I Slipped right into your skin So sweet was your surrender We have become one I have become my terror And you my precious lamb and martyr. He pulled his hand out of Jeff’s pants and grabbed his hips roughly. I have found some kind of temporary sanity in this shit blood and cum on my hands. I've come round full circle. My lamb and martyr, this will be over soon. You look so precious. He pulled back, violently throwing Jeff towards the bed. The younger man landed on his stomach, scrambling to face his assailant. Adam looked at Jeff, and felt a wave of nausea wash over him. He rushed to the bathroom, not totally making it to the toilet before he vomited, some of the awful stuff splashing on the tile floor. He cried as he threw up over and over again. He was hysterical. He wiped at his eyes, even as he continued to regurgitate. Adam continued to dry heave even after he’d expelled all the contents of his stomach. He sank to the floor, his body wracked in violent sobs that threatened to have him throwing up all over again, but he was too exhausted to even get to his knees. He wanted it to end. All of it! He hugged his arms, trying to stop the harsh crying. He forced himself to crawl to the shower. He rose on his knees, his fingers searching frantically along the shower shelves. He almost shouted in relief when he found what he as looking for. He sank down next to the bath tub, his legs stretched out in front of him. He tried to steady his shaking hands and clear his teary vision enough to accomplish the task at hand. He fumbled as he fought with his razor to remove the blade. Everyone who’d seen it asked why he had such an old fashioned thing. This was why. He yelped as he accidentally cut himself on the tip of his right index finger. He laughed at the fact. He was about the slit his wrists, they’d find him with a little cut on his finger, too. It wasn’t funny, but he was hysterical. “Adam?” came Jeff’s voice. Adam’s head shot up. Jeff stood right there in front of him. No shirt, no shoes, hair a mess, and a huge bruise forming on his shoulder. “Get out!” he shouted. Jeff didn’t move. What the fuck was he doing?! Why hadn’t he gone, gone running for help?!! “Adam, what are you doing?” Jeff asked, his voice panicked. Adam gawked at the younger man he’d just tried to rape. “Get OUT!” he screamed. “What the fuck are you doing? GET OUT!” Jeff still did not move. Adam finally got the blade out. It glinted in the light. “Christ!” Jeff shouted. He lunged for the older man as Adam brought the razor to his right wrist. He caught his hand, struggling with the man. “LET GO!” Adam screamed, trying to shove the smaller man away. Jeff seemed a lot stronger than normal, he twisted Adam’s left hand painfully until he was forced to release the blade. Adam shouted in insane anger and punched Jeff hard in the face. It didn’t even phase the younger man, who responded in kind. Adam’s head snapped back from the impact. He tried to get to his feet, but Jeff struck him again. His head hit the rim of the tub this time, knocking him a bit senseless. “Jesus man, what the Hell is wrong with you?” Jeff questioned his voice both angered and concerned at the same time. Adam felt himself being pulled into the bathtub. He groaned. “Just go,” he said weakly. “Yeah fucking right, man!” Jeff ground out at him through clenched teeth. He finally managed to get all of Adam into the tub, then reached over the taller man’s shoulder and turned the water on. It came out icy at first, then the hot kicked in. Jeff pulled the shower door shut as the hot spray washed over them. Adam tried to stand, but Jeff held him down with surprising strength. He could only turn partway to look up at the younger man. “Why are you doing this?” Adam asked, a sob in his voice. The water washed away his tears as they fell. “Why are you?” Jeff demanded. Adam couldn’t say anything to that. It was all too much for him to handle. He bit his lip and tried to turn away again. Jeff caught his shoulders, not allowing this. “Adam, what is going on?” he asked. Adam tried to answer, but his words were incoherent sobs. Jeff then did something, no one, especially not Adam Copeland, could understand. He brushed the wet hair from his attacker’s face, and pulled Adam’s head down onto his chest. He hugged him close and rested his chin on the soaked hair. “It’s going to be alright, Adam,” Jeff promised. “Whatever is happening, whatever you’re going through, we’ll figure it out.” Adam could have screamed at him, if he’d had the energy. He’d just assaulted the man horribly, and now here he was, holding him and making promises to make everything alright. He wanted to shake Jeff and make him realize that he was suppose to hate him. He was supposed to be disgusted and run for help, not hold him close, like they were still... friends. All he could do though was feel a gratefulness so immense it left him too weak to even raise his head. He cried onto Jeff’s bare chest, the heat of the water warming his iced body, but not so much as the warmth of the man who held him. “I’m so sorry, Jeff,” he sobbed. Jeff nodded, his chin rubbing against Adam’s scalp. “I know,” he said, simply. “We’ll work it out, don’t worry.” If Adam hadn’t been crying already, that would have been his undoing. He wrapped his arms around his friend, holding on for dear life. “I love you, Jeff,” he said against the wet flesh under his cheek. “I love you, too, Adam,” the younger man said without hesitation.

Chapter Four...Redemption From An Angel

Adam sat on his hotel bed, in only his boxers. Jeff came back from the closet with an extra blanket. He was wearing a pair of Adam’s pants, the legs rolled up a bit at the bottom. He wrapped the taller man in the soft blanket, giving his shoulders a reassuring squeeze. In addition to the bruise on his shoulder, Jeff now had one forming on his cheek from Adam’s punch. Adam himself had a split lip and black eye, along with a huge knot on the back of his head. And, of course, his cut finger. Jeff grabbed on of the room chairs and pulled it up in front of Adam. He sat down and patted the older man’s knee. “So, you ready?” he asked. Adam looked at him a moment, then nodded with a sigh. “Where should I begin?” he asked. He really needed to be told. Jeff cocked his head to one side. “At the beginning, why all of this happened,” he said. Adam nodded again. He took a deep breath to steady himself. Then, he looked at Jeff’s concerned, caring face. He began at the beginning. “When I was younger, about fifteen, I met this guy. Ryan. He went to my school. He was a senior, and I was just a freshman, but he started hanging around with me. He thought I was pretty cool, he said. We had a lot of fun together. I thought he might have really liked me, you know? But then, things started to get weird. He gave me odd looks, and acted different. I don’t know how to explain it, but it was strange. “Then one day, out of the blue, he asked me to go with him somewhere. It ended up being behind the school, when no one was there. He shoved me up against the wall, and called me his little angel. Said he needed me. Then, he broke me. He ripped my clothes and fucked me right there against the wall. When he was done, he dropped me in the dirt, pants around my ankles, bleeding, crying, and just walked away. “I didn’t know what to do. I thought it was my fault. I was so scared he’d tell everyone. Scared my parents would find out. So, I never told anyone.” “No one?” Jeff asked. Adam knew what he meant. “No, Jay doesn’t even know,” he told Jeff. “I withdrew for a while, I felt so disgusting, and I was having nightmares.” “How did you keep it a secret so long?” He asked. “I buried it way down. I started forcing myself to act normal again, as time went by, it got easier. Jay thought it was just because I had just realized I was gay. I thought I had it dealt with.” “Then, what happened?” Adam looked at Jeff a moment. “In short, you did.” “Me?” he asked, shocked. “What about me?” “You are a wonderful person Jeff, and you have a purity about you. It’s hard to... to say it in words. And something sinister inside of me reacted to it. Craved it. It’s an insanity. I was so scared, I didn’t know what would happen. What I might do. I tried to kill myself, but I chickened out.” Jeff stopped him for a moment. He rested a hand on his knee. “You don’t chicken out of suicide, Adam. I think it was harder for you to live with this, than kill yourself.” Adam did not know what to say to that. He lowered his eyes in shame. He didn’t deserve any kind of praise, not what he’d become. “Go on,” Jeff prodded gently. “Well, it built up. I was obsessing over you. You didn’t notice me watching you all the time?” Jeff shook his head. Adam shrugged and went on. “I started to resent you for what you had. Your innocence, or whatever you want to call it. And, well, I went crazy. First it was that kiss, and then you came up here. You know the rest.” “Why didn’t you go through with it?” Jeff asked. Adam looked at him. “I told you,” he said. When Jeff didn’t seem to know what he was talking about, he sighed. “Ryan didn’t care about me, so it was easy for him to... rape me, just as easily as he probably did others. But, when I had you there, against the wall, I realized I needed you, too. The way he’d needed me. It was you or me.” “And you chose me?” Jeff said, his eyes widening a bit. “Yes, I chose you. Like I said, it was easy for him because I didn’t mean anything to him. I love you, Jeff.” Adam looked at his hands. “I tried to kill myself in the bathroom, because I’m scared. I don’t know what to do. My soul is corrupt. I’m a monster, now, just like him.” Jeff caught Adam’s chin, forcing him to look up. His eyes were fierce as he spoke. “You listen to me. You are not like him, and you will never tell me otherwise. You are a good man, Adam. If you can’t see that for yourself, trust my judgement. If you weren’t, I would not be here right now. And your soul is not corrupt. You are not corrupt. You don’t have a soul, you are a soul, you have a body.” Jeff sighed, and his expression softened. “You are just a troubled man, Adam, that’s all. I don’t fault you for that.” He reached up and brushed the still damp hair from his friend’s face. “We’re gonna get you a good doctor, they’ll help you, and it will all work out,” Jeff sounded so sure. Adam wished he had half the confidence in himself that Jeff had in him. “I promise,” Jeff insisted. Adam searched his eyes. He really meant it. Jeff would be there for him, every step of the way. This struck something inside of Adam. He felt more tears, tears he didn’t think he had, gathering in his eyes. Jeff smiled, and brushed his cheek with the backs of his fingers. Adam leaned into the touch. Jeff scooted forward on his chair, and pulled Adam into a warm hug. The taller blonde rested his head on Jeff’s shoulder and wept silently, smiling gratefully. Jeff patted his back, and stroked his wet hair. “Tired?” Jeff asked. Adam sniffled. “Yeah,” he said. In fact, his whole body was screaming for rest. Jeff pulled back, and stood, pushing his chair back to where it belonged. He went back to Adam, unwrapping the blanket, and pulled his friend to his feet. Jeff pulled the comforter down and gently maneuvered Adam into the bed. He pulled the blanket up, tucking the older man in as though he were a sleepy child. He then went and switched off the lights, leaving the bathroom one on. He came back to the bed, and made sure Adam was comfortable once more before being satisfied. He leaned in and kissed the older man on his forehead, softly and sweetly. Adam felt the tears once more, as he stared up at the younger man in awe. “Jeff, you’re amazing,” he breathed. Jeff smiled softly, patting the shape of his arm under the blanket. He picked up the extra blanket and moved away. “Good night,” Adam called. Jeff chuckled in the darkness. “Good night, Adam,” he said. The sound of creaking furniture came to the blonde’s ears. “Aren’t you going?” he asked. “Nope,” came the simple reply, then the rustling of the blanket. “Now, go to sleep. We have an appointment to keep in the morning.” “What appointment?” “IHOP. You promised Matt.” “Jeff, I don’t think...” Adam trailed off, not sure he could go through with seeing his friends after what he’d done. “Good, don’t think. Adam, you are still our friend. You are still my friend. Don’t forget that. People care about you.” “What about the bruises?” Adam asked. “We’ll tell them we got into a fight with some assholes when we went out to get a bite to eat.,” Jeff told him. He yawned loudly, as if signaling Adam that it was time for quiet. Adam thought a moment, then said one more thing. “Jeff, you’re my hero, you know,” he said sincerely. “I mean it, my guardian angel.” For a moment, there was silence. Adam thought maybe Jeff had fallen asleep. But then he spoke up at last. “I love you, too, Adam. Now, get some sleep. I won’t leave, I promise.” Adam sighed and snuggled down in the bed. The fact that Jeff was not going to leave helping ease his nightly worry of nightmares. The vastness of how much Jeff cared for him made his own heart swell with joy, and made him think, for the first time in forever, that things really would be alright.