I'm Still Standing By Mistress
	TITLE: I'm Still Standing AUTHOR: Mistress EMAIL: TakerMistress@w..., sammie_y@h..., america_bad_ass_babe@y... RATING: R CONTENT: Slash, Language, Some mention of sex...sorta, angst CATEGORY: Slash, M/M, Angst SPOILERS: Um...Taker and Jeff match over the belt and the stuff leading up to it. SUMMARY: What does it take to break a man DISCLAIMER: not mine don't sue DISTRIBUTION: Tracy, anyone else ask first I thought it would break me. I thought it would leave me broken and bloodied on the ground. When you walked away. I knew it would end me. I could hear my heart shatter with every step you took. The tears fell in a flood I though would never stop. My soul lay gasping for breath, devoid of the life you took with you. I though it was love. I thought it was forever You held me in your arms every night. Your voice was soft, silky granite. Whispering promises of a future of happiness and bliss. Your body was warm against mine, keeping away the chill of night and fighting the nightmares of loneliness and depression. Then like a shot in the dark, no warning at all, you were gone. No more stolen kisses or looks filled with love. No more whispers in darkness, wanting to keep the peace with us. No more caresses of your flesh on mine. No you. No me. No us. Just and empty place in the bed, and empty place in me. And I thought that was it. Because you broke my spirit. You shattered my will. My soul. Your ripped out my heart with your bare hands and squeezed the life away. You broke my dreams. Shattered them before they came true. Like smoke and mirrors. They were an illusion you took with you when you walked out the door. But I saw you everywhere. I couldn't die in peace. I had to be reminded that you were still there. I saw you in my dreams. I saw you every day, every show. Your red hair shining with the stage lights, eyes flashing danger and predatory anger. But no remorse. No regret. You continued to live while I died a little each day. I suffer, you should suffer. And that's why. That's why I jumped you from behind. That's why I stayed. Let you see me. Let you see my anger, my hurt. That's why I fight. Why I strike out at you every chance I get. So you hurt too. So you can see what you did to me. So you will know. I want you to feel every hurt and pain I do. I need you to feel it. But you're stronger than that. You always have been. You barely feel what I do. You barely even acknowledge me at all. Barely even know I'm there. Until I talk. I can see see it in your eyes then. Because you can hear it. Loud and clear. And I can see your own hurt, your own pain. I don't care any more. You did it. You did it to me. You did it to yourself. And it was brutal. It was painfully brutal and deadly. It hurt, so bad I just wanted it to end. But I couldn't let it. I couldn't let you beat me, not at this. Not this time. I can't. You may have beat me in front of the fans, but I won't let you beat me down. I won't let you break me. I'm still standing. With my heart bleeding on the floor I'm still standing. With the light gone out of my life I'm still standing. And even if I die inside, if I only breath one more breath of hope, I'm still standing THE END