'Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until  the next morning?'

'The youngest son,the 20-year old,how old is he?'

'Were u alone or by yourself?'

'How many times have u committed suicide?'

Q:'How was your first marriage terminated?'
'By death.'
'And by whose death was it terminated?'

Q:'Doctor ,how many autopsies have u preformed on dead people?'
'All my autopsies are on dead people'

'Did he kill u?'

Q: 'You say the stairs went down to the basement?'
'Yes'
'And these stairs , did they also go up?'

Q:'Mr. Slattery,u went on a rather elaborate honeymoon,didn't u?'
'I went to Europe, sir.'
Q:'And u took your new wife?'

Q:'So the date of conception of the baby was 8 august?'
'Yes'
'And what were u doing at that time?'

Q:She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q:How many were boys?
A:None.
Q:Were there any girls?

'Was it u or your younger brother who was killed in the war?'

Q: Did u recall the time that u examined the body?
A: The autopsy started around 8.30 PM.
Q: And Mr. Smith was dead at that time?
A:No, he was sittin' at the table wondering why I was doin' the autopsy!

'All your responses must be oral, OK'
What school did u go to?'
"Oral!"

'R u  qualified to give a urine sample?'
"I have been since early childhood!'

'Can u describe the individual?
'He was about medium height & had a beard.'
'Was this a male or a female?'

'Doctor ,before u performed the autopsy,did u check for the pulse?'
'No'
Did u check for the BP?'
'No'
'So then it is possible that the patient was alive when u began the autopsy?'
'No'
'How can u be so sure ,doc?'
'Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar'
'But could the patient still be alive,nevertheless?'
'It is possible that he could be still alive & practicing law somewhere...'

'Were u present when your picture was taken?'

'Is your appearance this morning pursuant to the deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?'
'No,this is how I dress when I go to work.'

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